[Part 1 – The World Seems to Revolve Around Me?]

 

“Did you hear that she spent the night with Jaehyun last night?”

 

That wasn’t true!

 

“Really? Didn’t she just spend the night with Johnny the night before?”

 

Also, not true.

 

I sigh to myself; I didn’t understand why all these rumors were always being brought up about me. It was like the world revolved around me or something and it wasn’t supposed to. Everywhere I went people talked about me, the made-up rumors about me. Who I was apparently sleeping with, who I wasn’t sleeping with.

 

It was beyond weird.

 

“So, did you spend the night with Jaehyun last night?” Kun asks once I’m all settled into my usual seat at lunch.

 

I roll my eyes, “Of course, not.”

 

But, of course, Jaehyun arrives at our table smiling down at me to prove my exact words wrong. “Hey, I had fun last night. We should do it again sometime.” He winks before blowing me a kiss.

 

“You were saying?” Kun laughs under his breath.

 

What the was that about? I had in fact saw him last night at the movie theatre and we greeted one another but that was it. Why was he making it seem like something else entirely different happened?

 

I was pissed. I lunge out of my seat stomping after Jaehyun who was headed out of the cafeteria.

 

“Hey!” I roughly grab him by his upper arm. “What the was that about?”

 

Jaehyun looks down at me confused. “What do you mean?”

 

I scoff, repeating his words exasperatedly to myself. “Why are you making it seem like we slept together last night?”

 

Jaehyun tilts his head to the side confusion covering his face even more than before. “That’s because we did sleep together.”

 

I shake my head chuckling sarcastically. “No, we didn’t. Why are you being so creepy?”

 

“Creepy?” He scoffs. “You’re the one that jumped me.” He pulls his phone from his pocket and does something on it before shoving it towards my face. “Look.”

 

My eyes focus on his phone which displayed a less than innocence image of us both. “What is this?” My heart pounds in my chest. The date and time displayed for the image were that of last nights. Which makes me seem like I’m lying. But I certainly don’t remember sleeping with Jaehyun at that time last night. In fact, I can very vividly remember everything that I did last night and Jaehyun wasn’t one of them.

 

“You done denying it?” He pulls his phone back slipping it in his pocket. Why did he even have that photo even if we had done it? He was the creep. He turns on his feet moving to walk away from me, but I wasn’t done yet.

 

He had to have faked that photo.

 

Everyone in the hall that was witnessing us speaking to one another were whispering and making me regret confronting him in such an open space. Why was I drawing attention to myself again?

 

“I’m not done talking to you yet!” I yell after Jaehyun and this time when he turns, I feel a bit dizzy. I quickly reach for my head, a ringing in my ears as Jaehyun becomes blurry before splitting almost into two. Someone brushes past his shoulder and Jaehyun’s split figures almost like that of a rubber band snap back into one and the ringing stops.

 

My eyes focus on the person who had bumped shoulders with him, and I squint not recognizing the boy. He was almost as tall as Jaehyun, scrawnier than him, with black hair and feline-like eyes. He’d do to prove my point.

 

I step towards the boy, my fingers wrapping around the collar of his uniform roughly tugging his face towards mine. I crash my lips into his and I feel how tense he is just from the contact of our lips. In retrospect this was horrible for me to do to someone but in the moment, I was blinded by the rage Jaehyun was putting me through.

 

I pull back to glance at Jaehyun. “This is what real looks. Last night was not real.” I say through my teeth but to my surprise Jaehyun’s already at the other end of the hall and suddenly everyone’s attention is no longer on me. For the first time ever, I can breathe.

 

Why weren’t people gossiping about what I had just done? A pair of cold fingers wrap around my wrist that still held onto the collar of the boy’s uniform. My eyes dart back to him as he lightly tugs my fingers from his shirt. He rests my hand back to my side as my eyes study his face that was void of any emotion. He turns to leave but I quickly move to stand in front of him cutting him off.

 

Who was this boy?

 

My eyes drop down to his nametag, but it was blank which causes my eyes to dart back up to his face. Why did he have a blank nametag? He blinks back at me, his face finally showing an emotion, confusion washes over his face.

 

“Who are you?” I ask him, my eyes studying his face. His skin seems so smooth, eyes so shockingly piercing that I wondered how I hadn’t seen him before this moment. There was a scar near his lip that interrupted his smooth skin but that made him even more handsome. I glance around the hall and notice people are still not paying us any attention, in fact, they were acting as if we weren’t standing in the middle of the hall.

 

“I’m Doyoung.” He finally speaks, his voice is silvery and soft-spoken which surprises me due to the way it contrasts with his piercing gaze. “Kim Doyoung.” He repeats and my eyes lower to his nametag again becoming slightly taken back because there his name was displayed across it despite it being blank earlier.

 

What is wrong with me? I raise a hand to my head rubbing at it.

 

I clear my throat, “I’m…” I stop, what was my name again? How is it that I don’t remember my name? I was so confused. Now that I think about it though, no one has ever called me by my name either, I was always talked about using pronouns.

 

“I’m…” I start again. “I’m Yoo Chaeyeon.” I finally speak out despite that name seeming foreign and not quite correct.

 

He blinks back at me slightly tilting his head. “Did you need something, Yoo Chaeyeon?” He rubs his lips together once he’s finished his sentence and I shudder hearing my name come from between them.

 

This was the first I had ever heard someone say my name.

 

“Aren’t you curious as to why I kissed you earlier?” I question him resting my hands on my hips.

 

He chuckles, his teeth showing, and my stomach suddenly prickles at the sight. My hand quickly rests on it at the weird feeling. “I’m sure it was just a part of the scenario set out for you.”

 

“Scenario?” It was my turn to tilt my head. “What are you talking about?”

 

The smile is wiped from his face at my words. He chews on his lip, “You won’t remember anyway so I’ll tell you, this place isn’t real.”

 

I snort, “It’s not real?” I chuckle resting my hand over my lips as I do. “If it’s not real then what is it?”

 

“A simulation.” He says in all seriousness which sends a shudder down my spine. He shrugs moving to brush past me and as he does electricity forms between our arms.

 

Suddenly everyone’s attention is on me again and I take a step back at their creepy stares. I turn on my heels, eyes fixing on Doyoung’s back. Was what he said true?

 

I rush after him my hand wrapping around his arm to which he slightly jumps at the contact. I glance around and am relieved to see everyone’s attention has fallen away from me once more. I hold on tightly to his arm my eyes raising to him.

 

It was him. He kept them from noticing me for some reason.

 

“How is it that you shield me from them?” I glance at the others and his eyes follow mine.

 

“Nobody ever pays attention to me.” He shrugs. “Not even you, not until now.” His eyes search mine making me feel all vulnerable. “It must be because I have always known that this isn’t real.”

 

“Can you help me understand too?” I plead with him.

 

His eyes sparkle. “Are you sure you can handle it?”

 

“What?”

 

“The truth about us and why we’re here, Yoo Chaeyeon.”

 

-

-

-

 

“Don’t give into them.” A voice begs from within the darkness.

 

But it’s not something I can control and throughout the week my memories of him dissipate. The life that was always present in his eyes and his gummy smile fades as the days progress. And when he begs me not to leave him, I do.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Part 2 – A State of Confusion]

 

Light floods into my vision as my eyes slowly open. I in a breath at the sudden feelings rushing into my body. A face suddenly appears above me, one of a stranger. His hair was strikingly blonde, and a small sad smile was present on his face.

 

“You’re finally awake.” The stranger speaks and as his sentence ends the sounds of a machine beeping draw my attention to it. I don’t quite understand what is happening.

 

I slowly sit up and the stranger backs up to give me space. My gaze runs over the stark white room that was filled with machinery. I let my eyes drop to my hands as I raise them into the air. An IV was in one of my arms and I was in a light blue hospital gown.

 

My eyes dart back up to the blonde man, “Who are you? Where am I? Why can’t I remember anything?” My hand reaches to rest on my head expecting a headache but surprisingly I feel nothing.

 

“I am Lee Taeyong.” He smiles innocently. “You are Yoon Chaeyoon, a victim of a horrible experiment by a company named Scientific Minds Incorporated, or SM Incorporated. The experiment was known as The Synchronization of Your Dreams and its purpose was to link the minds of several individuals through a medically induced sleep.” He pauses to make sure I’m still following along which to be honest this was all so farfetched that it wasn’t making any sense.

 

“Through this a world of sorts was created and they were able to manipulate that world. They were able to control people that you guys dreamed up inside your world and they put you guys through all sorts of tests within that synchronized world.” Taeyong hums out shrugging. “That is until their experiments were outed to the world and found unethical. At first the company was able to prevent anyone from entering the facility, but police have successfully infiltrated. I am a scientist from a government facility that the police sent in after arresting the remainder of SM Incorporated that didn’t flea. We pulled you from your simulation.”

 

“A simulation…” I mumble out, why do I feel like I’ve heard this before?

 

“That’s what we’re calling it in short even though I’m not sure that’s the term they used.” Taeyong nods glancing at the computer screen behind him.

 

“How long have I been experimented on?” I ask him, fearing the answer he’d give me.

 

“A few years, SM Incorporated had a major shareholder go bankrupt a few months ago and that’s when the news spilled about the experiments.” He pulls a chair towards my bed sitting comfortably. “From my understanding most of you guys were drawn into the experiments through lies and coercion. Most of you were college students who signed up for study on your sleep habits. You were lured here under that pretense, and you never left.”

 

“What about my family?” I quickly ask. I couldn’t remember them.

 

“All of you that signed up conveniently had no intermediate family. They planned it so that no one would come looking for you.” He answers and my heart sinks into my stomach. So, I was alone. I felt even more alone with no memories. All of this sounded so foreign and unreal.

 

“How do I know this is real and not a part of this simulation you speak of?”

 

“Would you like to meet the others?” He stands once more pushing the chair away.

 

The others? The other individuals that went through this apparent experiment.

 

“Yes.”

 

Taeyong helps me rid myself of the IV slapping a band aid over the small hole to stop the bleeding. He holds his hand out to me and I slowly rest my hand on his. He helps me to my feet and when my weight settles, I almost lose footing if it weren’t for his other arm resting around my waist holding me up.

 

I blush to myself feeling helpless. I gain my bearings and slowly Taeyong guides me out of the stark white room into an equally stark white hallway. The white was so bright it was almost beginning to blind me.

 

Taeyong tugs me in the direction of a set of double doors before slowly pushing them open. Inside sat six other individuals, the majority male. Each of them stops speaking as Taeyong and I enter.

 

“Chaeyoon!” A voice calls out and I quickly whip my head towards it.

 

My eyes widen at the brunette, “Kun?” I speak out. Why did I remember him?

 

He comes forward rushing to pull me into a tight hug. “You were real.” He mumbles into the top of my head.

 

My heart pounds in my chest. So, I wasn’t fully alone. I pull back from Kun and he gestures out towards another individual in which I recognize. “Look Jaehyun is here too.”

 

Jaehyun awkwardly waves. “Hey. Sorry uh-about everything.”

 

I remember it now. The rumors that we slept together and how he had the photos to prove it. Why does that seem like such a distant memory though?

 

I shake my head. “None of it was real anyway.”

 

My eyes trail along the other individuals and none of them familiar. “Hey, you know me too, right, I’m Johnny.” The tallest male nods his head to which I tilt my head.

 

“I was also rumored to have slept with you too.” I chuckle. “But I don’t recognize you at all.”

 

He laughs, “Well, that’s awkward. I recognize you.”

 

Yikes. That is awkward.

 

My eyes trail over to one of the two girls. “Hello. I’m Park Liah. Apparently, we went to different schools within the simulation, so I don’t think we’d recognize each other.” She gestures to the other girl. “This is Kim Ahrim, she was my best friend, and this is Lee Jeno, my boyfriend from within the simulation.”

 

“This is so weird. I’m sorry.” I shake my head. My eyes move past the three expecting to see more people but there was no one there. “Is this all of us? I feel like someone is missing.”

 

Taeyong awkwardly clears his throat. “There were more of you, yes, though unfortunately some of you weren’t lucky.” Everyone goes silent at his words.

 

“What do you mean?” Kun speaks out. My hand flies to Kun’s arm holding tightly.

 

“Some died from shocking events within the simulation, some were killed by the scientists to try and hide what was really going on, and some died coming out of the simulation.” He admits lowering his head.

 

My stomach turns and I squeeze Kun’s arm even tighter. “Can we see them?” I mumble out.

 

Taeyong shakes his head. “Their bodies have already been taken for a proper burial. It was what the police decided was best.”

 

“Now what do we do?” Johnny speaks up. “What are we supposed to do now? They ruined our lives. We all have nothing and have missed a portion of our lives.”

 

“Jeno, Liah, and Ahrim may leave once an initial test is run to ensure they are perfectly healthy.” Taeyong hums out and Kun scoffs.

 

“And what of the rest of us?” Kun crosses his arms.

 

“The remaining four of you will stay for additional testing due to the amount of time you all spent within the simulation being drastically different to the other three.” Taeyong sadly informs us.

 

“So, we don’t get to leave this prison even though we’re finally free?” Jaehyun speaks up his voice harsh.

 

“I promise it won’t be for more than a month.”

 

-

 

We all say goodbye to the three that get to leave today before we are separated into separate rooms for the time being and when I’m left alone with my thought’s anxiety eats away at me. I remember certain things from within the simulation, but everything felt so distant. Like it happened a long time ago. I lie back on my bed and wonder why it felt like that. Was it because it was a simulation that it felt so distant? Maybe it was that it felt unreal instead of distant. I was unsure.

 

The door to my room opens up and Taeyong appears, moving to shut the door.

 

“Are you okay?” He asks me, moving to sit down beside me on my bed.

 

I shrug, “It all just feels so unreal.”

 

He rests a hand on my arm. “I can only imagine what it must feel like.” His eyes seemingly search my face before sighing. “What all do you remember? Maybe talking about it will help alleviate some of your feelings.”

 

I slowly sit up, “I remember feeling like the world revolved around me. There was always some weird rumor going around about me. I was the center of attention or at least it felt that way. I remember Kun and how he asked me if I had slept with Jaehyun and Jaehyun appearing and later showing me a photo to prove that we had slept together even though we definitely didn’t.” I squint trying to remember more of that situation because I felt like more had happened. “And that’s it…you must’ve woken me up and pulled me out of the simulation because I don’t remember anything after Jaehyun showed me the photo.”

 

Suddenly I wince, my hand quickly raising to my head. “This isn’t real, remember that, for if you do you won’t play into their hand.” A voice echoes in my mind.

 

“Chaeyoon?” Taeyong takes ahold of my shoulders, and I wince once more trying to get the ringing in my ears to stop. My vision goes blurry and I’m suddenly staring at Jaehyun as he splits into two, a broad shoulder bumps past his shoulder causing him to snap back into one and suddenly Taeyong is shaking me out of whatever I was just experiencing.

 

“You’re okay.” He’s softly consoling me, his fingers moving to my face wiping at something wet that was running down my cheeks. I was crying. “I’m sorry if this is inappropriate.” He tugs me into his arms hugging me and in my vulnerable state I appreciated it. My arms slowly raise to hold him against me, and his warmth made me feel like I was in fact real. That I wasn’t still stuck in some simulation.

 

-

 

Two days pass by and Taeyong returns to my room to inform me that they’ve allowed Johnny to leave. He passed all his tests and was healthy.

 

“What’s wrong with me that makes it appear that I’m not healthy?” I ask Taeyong as he leans back against the wall while sitting on the end of my bed.

 

His eyes were closed but pop open upon my question. “I think you already know the answer to that question, I saw what happened when you tried to remember the simulation just two days ago, Chaeyoon. Your mind is unstable.”

 

I sigh, I guess that made sense. “So, I’m just supposed to stay locked in this room. Is that supposed to help me?” I roll my eyes. “Can’t I go outside? Or visit with Kun and Jaehyun?”

 

He hums gesturing a hand towards me. “I’m not supposed to, but I can take you outside for a little bit.”

 

I smile softly towards him. “Thanks, Taeyong.”

He lowers his head, his ear’s turning red. Was he blushing right now?

 

I choose to ignore his obvious blushing taking his hand as he guides me out of the room.

 

Once outside I breathe in the fresh crisp air and take in the greenery. I examine the dark gray building and how there seemed to be nothing within the area other than trees. The building was huge too so I couldn’t see beyond it on the one side.

 

Taeyong glances at me smiling wide at my curious eyes. I glance at him suddenly feeling a burst of energy. I rush forward tapping my hand on his. “Tag, you’re it!”

 

I take off running and I can hear Taeyong laugh as he starts sprinting after me. This goes on for a bit before I run out of breath and Taeyong’s playfully tackling me to the ground. He lands on top of me breathing heavily smiling down at me.

 

I chuckle, wiping at the sweat that has formed on my forehead. Taeyong catches his breath before moving a hand to brush my hair out of my face. He smiles down at me once more before rolling off of me to lie next to me.

 

As he does, I’m met with the blue of the sky staring back at me. The sun begins to slowly peek out from behind a cloud and when its rays fall into my eyes I suddenly can’t breathe. Something akin to electricity prickles at the back of my neck and a sharp pain follows.

 

Darkness floods my vision replacing the sun and all the earthy things that once surrounded me. “I know that it hurts, but you have to stay awake.” A silvery voice murmurs lowly. The pain slowly fades away and the silvery voice calms down as it speaks again. “The thought of losing you scares me.” Even though calm I could sense despair hidden behind it, the words spoken themselves dripped in it.

 

The pain returns and the silvery voice is frantic as it speaks again, “I’ve got you; it’s going to be okay; you’re going to be okay.”

 

The silvery voice is slowly replaced with Taeyong’s rough voice, “It’s okay, I’m here, Chaeyoon.”

 

My vision returns to Taeyong’s worried eyes and arms holding me. “Taeyong?” I cry out due to the fading pain.

 

“Shh.” He hushes me pressing my ear to his chest. “Listen to my heartbeat. Just focus on that and that only.”

 

I let silence sit between us doing just that and it does calm me down and finally the pain subsides. “Just breathe.” Taeyong says as he slowly pulls away swiping my hair away once again.

 

“What’s wrong with me?” I ask him, fear filling my body.

 

He sighs, “You’re trying to remember.” He lowers his head. “I wish that you wouldn’t, it will only cause you pain.” His eyes raise to mine, a deep look of sorrow within them. “Please don’t remember.”

 

-

 

Taeyong returns me to my room and when he makes sure I’m tucked into bed he moves to stand. I reach for the sleeve of his lab jacket to keep him from leaving. “Taeyong, would you stay with me tonight?”

 

I can see his adam’s apple bob as he swallows seemingly nervous before he glances back at me offering me a small smile. “Of course.”

 

He slips into bed next to me wrapping his arms around me. The warmth his body gives me gives me a sense of déjà vu, like I had felt this before but not with him. It felt the same yet different, but I didn’t want to think about that anymore. Especially if it would bring back the pain I felt earlier.

 

“You don’t have to be alone, Chaeyoon.” Taeyong mumbles after a while. “I’m here.”

 

I glance up at him and when our eyes meet, I feel the urge to kiss him. My eyes lower to his lips and he beats me to the punch by quickly closing the gap between us. I felt a weird feeling as our lips lazily locked, this too felt familiar but like it had happened elsewhere somewhere in the distance but not with him. I was confused but I did like the feelings it brought upon me.

 

-

 

I wake the next morning to an empty bed as Taeyong left to tend to the others as I slept. I smile to myself remembering how his lips felt against mine. As I brush my fingers against my lips something flashes before my eyes.

 

My own voice echoes throughout my mind, “Tell me how much you love me.”

 

“Must I tell you? Can’t I show you?” The silvery voice from before returns.

 

“Show me then.” My own voice answers. A warmth spreads across my lips but the feeling feels distant but similar to how Taeyong’s lips felt against mine last night.

 

“I love it when you hold me like this.” I say once the warmth fades from my lips.

 

The pain from before returns in a sudden wave and this time it spreads down my spine. A brittle voice calls out to me, and I can tell it belongs to same silvery voice as before, but it’s changed and is shaky and barely there.

 

“Please don’t close your eyes, please don’t. Don’t go, Chaey…” The brittle voice cries out and I feel tears soaking down into my gown. “Please I beg of you, don’t leave me here.”

 

I let out a loud gasp at the feeling, why did that feel so real? Why did it feel like it had happened recently?

 

When Taeyong enters later I pretend nothing happened. I didn’t want to worry him.

 

“Jaehyun was sent home today.” He informs me with a smile. “Soon that will be you.”

 

I cuddle into his side. “Will you be coming with me when I do?”

 

He smiles wide, “If you want me to I will.”

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