“Thank you for all these years Joohyun unnie. I know this is sudden and I know you’re surprised to see this letter. I’m a coward because I can’t just tell you this directly because I’m afraid that I might not be strong enough to let you go. I’ll always love you unnie. But I know you weren’t mine to lose. I hope Seulgi will always make you happy. I’ll always love you Bae Joohyun.”

Irene teared up while reading her best friend's letter that she left on the kitchen table probably this morning. Irene just came home from work only to find out her shared apartment is empty and Wendy is gone. She didn’t know where she went but Irene instantly rushed back out to her car wanting to find her best friend. She didn’t know why Wendy was acting this way, because just yesterday they were together in the apartment and she was telling the younger girl that Seulgi had proposed to her. 

At that moment, Irene didn’t notice the surprised look Wendy made while trying to put on a fake smile and congratulate the older girl. After that Wendy told Irene to change into warm clothes because Wendy wanted to go celebrate with her. 

And that night, together they went to the mountainside to just enjoy the view and spend one last time together. Irene kept talking about how happy she was that Seulgi finally proposed and she was talking about how she and Seulgi are gonna have a beautiful family soon.  What Irene didn’t notice is the look of resignation and hurt in Wendy that can be seen all across her face as the older girl kept talking about her future plan with Seulgi while they’re climbing to the peak of the mountain. 

Wendy realizes right then and there that she will never have Irene. She will never be able to have Irene love like Seulgi does. She will never be able to wake up to the beautiful face of Irene every morning like she wanted it to be. She will never be able to have a family together with Irene and grow old together with the only girl that she loves.

After they reached the peak, Wendy turned to look at the older girl while Irene was enjoying the night sky. She was memorizing her face. She wanted to remember her for the rest of her life. After a while, Wendy finally broke the silence.

“Congratulations unnie. I’m really happy for you.” Wendy said while trying to hold back her tears.

“Thanks Wannie.. I want to thank you too because all this time You always make me feel safe. You always take care of me and you always love me like I’m your real sister. I’m really thankful for that. But now you don’t have to do that anymore. Because I have Seulgi now. And you finally can go on and look for a girlfriend now.” Said Irene while smirking. 

“Nahh.. I’m good. My heart already belongs to someone and I don’t think I can take it back.” Wendy said mindlessly while enjoying the view of the night city.

“Oh really? Who is she? Or who is he? Why did you never tell me??” Ask Irene while hitting Wendy lightly on her shoulder.

It's you, unnie. Wendy taught to herself. “She’s someone I’m close with.. you know her too.. but sadly I don’t think she loves me back.” Wendy said. She didn’t have the courage to tell Irene that it was her. She was afraid. Afraid to face the reality that Irene will never love her. And she’s also afraid that Irene might decide to not be friends with her again if she confesses her true feelings.

“Ohh.. really?? Who??” Irene asked her while thinking of a possible person that can fit the picture. 

“You know her.. but I’m not telling you who it is though.. you’ll know that tomorrow.” Wendy said while trying to hide the sadness in her tone. 

“But how are you so sure that she doesn’t love you back? Have you asked her?” Ask Irene.

“Because she already has someone else that she loves and they love each other so much that I’ll just hurt her if I confess my love to her… so I’ll just let her go and live on my own.” Said Wendy with sadness in her tone. 

“Ohh.. I’m sorry Wendy.. but whoever she is, I know that she doesn’t know what she’s missing. Because I know that you’re the most loving, caring, kindhearted person I've ever known and that it's just impossible to not love you.” Irene said, trying to cheer her friend up.

“Do you love me unnie?” Wendy asked mindlessly. 

“Of course I do. You’re like a sister to me and I love you Wendy-ah.” Irene said.

Like a sister. She loves me just as a sister. Wendy taught. “Thank you unnie.” Wendy said, smiling at her. “I hope that you’ll have a wonderful and happy life with Seulgi.” 

Wendy used to always prioritize Irene in everything. Wendy is even willing to sacrifice her life for Irene if you ask her. But even then, Wendy knows that she will never have Irene. That’s why she decided to just leave her life and be on her way. 

The next day, after Irene went to work. Wendy packed all her things to move out of the apartment. She put down her letter on the kitchen table and walked out to the door. Taking one last glance at the apartment she has shared with the older girl for the past 3 years, memory started flooding back in. The first time they moved into the apartment. That time when Irene got so drunk after going out with her friends that she puked all over the couch. That time, Irene almost burned their kitchen down after forgetting to turn off the stove while heating up some leftover tteokbokki. So many memories coming back on Wendy like a freight train making her cry again. Taking one last final glance at the apartment, Wendy left with all her happy memories still in the apartment. 

Irene didn’t know where to look for Wendy. She’s been searching around the block but no sign of her. She had called Wendy while searching for her around the block but Wendy’s not answering her call. Then she called her friends asking Wendy whereabouts but no one knew. She even called Wendy’s parents to ask if maybe Wendy had come back to her hometown, but in the end no one knows where she is. 

At her last attempt, Irene called her again hoping the younger girl would answer and she did.

“Hello?”

“Oh my God, Wendy-ah… thank God you picked up. Where are you?? Why did you leave the apartment?? I’ll pick you up now, tell me where you are.” Irene said desperately.

“Don’t do that unnie. I’m leaving for a reason. And I don’t want to come back.” Wendy said.

“Why are you like this huh? Why don’t you tell me about how you feel, Wendy-ah?” Irene asked, her voice shaking and tears started b up in her eyes.

“Please don’t cry unnie.. I just want you to be happy. I’m sorry I’m not the one that can bring you happiness. But I’m happy that Seulgi can give you that.” Wendy said. 

“Promise me that you’ll always be happy unnie. Thank you for letting me love you all this time. I’m sorry I can’t be your source of happiness. I hope we’ll meet again someday.”

“Wendy-ah.. don’t do this please.. please come back..” Irene said through her tears.

“I’m sorry unnie.. but I can’t do that. You know I love you right. And this is also another way of me loving you unnie. I’ll let you go now. I’ll always love you unnie. Don’t forget about me.” Wendy said for the last time then she hung up the phone. 

Wendy knows she’s a selfish person. She chose to just leave the older girl just like that. But she also knows that Irene will move on. She has Seulgi that she loves. She has Seulgi that can give her happiness and later on they’ll become a family and live happily. 

Sooyoung, seeing the older girl looking miserably at her couch after the call, joins her and gives her a hug to calm the older girl down. “Why do you do that if you can’t let her go unnie? Why don’t you tell Irene unnie about how you feel?” Ask Sooyoung while still comforting her.

“I have to Sooyoung-ah.. I had to let her go so that she can be happy even now she might be a little sad. But I know she’ll be happy with Seulgi” Wendy said through her tears. “Thank you for keeping me here.”

“No problem unnie. But I’m curious.. Why do you give up now? After all you’ve been through.. you always prioritize Irene unnie over everything.. I still remember how many times you canceled our plan just because Irene unnie had something to do.. so why give up now??” Ask Sooyoung.

“Cause she wasn’t mine to lose.. and she will never be.”