Chapter Five

Beauty of My World

"What is it?" Taehyung asks, noticing that Seokjin is leading him in another direction.

 

"The stream ended but..." Seokjin's voice trails off but immediately, Taehyung recognizes where they are. The soft, billowing breeze, the terrain they're on, and the maple scent tell him that they are approaching the maple tree where his omega dad lies. 

 

At that moment, Taehyung yanks his sleeve out of Seokjin's hold. "What's wrong?" Seokjin asks, confusion in his voice.

 

Taehyung takes a few steps back, panicked, frantic, and guilty. "I'm sorry..." he attempts to apologize but he knows it doesn't matter. His alpha father is gone and there's no bringing him back.

 

Taehyung has not visited his omega dad since the accident. He couldn't bring himself to. Won't he be disappointed at Taehyung? He must hate him for killing his alpha father. Who wouldn't? Even Taehyung hates himself. 

 

Doing the only thing he can, Taehyung turns away from his dad and runs. He doesn't know where to but he can't stay.

 

"Taehyung!" Seokjin calls out after him but he doesn't stop running. He just wants to be alone. Alone, where he won't be a bother to anyone anymore. 

 

Taehyung hasn't run in so long. It feels refreshing to run again so he picks up speed. All the while trying to not listen to any of his thoughts.

 

He's aware of where he is as he feels branches scratch him and tree roots trip him. It's only when he runs straight into a tree that he's forced to fall over onto the ground, defeated. 

 

He lands with a hard thump and sits up with a throbbing in his head. It's completely silent in the forest except for the sound of his breathing. He can't hear Seokjin at all. 

 

Knowing that he's all alone, Taehyung curls up into a ball. He buries his face into his knees as the inevitable happens and he remembers why he's out here. Unable to control them, tears spring out of his eyes. 

 

He shouldn't have fought with his alpha father. He should've just agreed to the marriage. Then, his father would still be alive and Taehyung wouldn't be all alone, wallowing in misery. 

 

Taehyung's still curled up, crying with his shoulders shaking when he hears a branch snap. In one swipe, he wipes all his tears away. He peers over his shoulder where the noise came from. 

 

He doesn't know how exactly but he knows that it's Seokjin. Seokjin doesn't speak which makes Taehyung question whether it's him. He simply comes over to Taehyung, sitting down next to him. 

 

Another tear slips from his eyes as he recalls where he last was with Seokjin. Seokjin must've seen this only tear despite Taehyung turning his head away so that he wouldn't see because he places a hand on his shoulder. Gently, he apologizes(though he doesn't know what for), "I'm sorry, Taehyung." 

 

Taehyung turns around quickly, pressing his face into Seokjin's chest as more tears drip from his eyes. Seokjin's arms wrap around him, holding his shaking form. 

 

Taehyung has so many conflicts weighing down on him but being in Seokjin's arms, he feels comfortable. 

 

He's not sure how long he cries. Now and then, Seokjin would pat his back which calms him down. Eventually, he pulls away from Seokjin.

 

He keeps his head down. Now that he has some clarity, he can't believe he cried in front of Seokjin. "Are you feeling better?" Seokjin asks, breaking the silence.

 

"Somewhat," Taehyung answers with a slight waver in his voice. He curses himself for letting his voice waver but realizes that at this point, it doesn't matter much since Seokjin's already seen him with tears.

 

"Do you," Seokjin pauses. "want to talk about it?" 

 

Taehyung lifts his head slightly. "You want to...hear?" he asks, doubtful and almost, timid. He had expected them to go back home and forget the whole ordeal. Yet, it seems that that isn't the case for Seokjin.

 

"If you're comfortable telling me," Seokjin articulates clemently. 

 

Taehyung inhales shakily. Seokjin would like to hear his concerns. Why? He won't get anything out of it. Should he confide in Seokjin? Taehyung has never really shared his feelings with another. He talks to Hoseok about some of his thoughts but not his emotions. Will any good come from sharing?

 

He exhales. "Do you want to hear everything?" he asks, meekly.

 

"I don't need to hear everything," Seokjin reassures him. "Just share with me what you want." 

 

Maybe he can just tell Seokjin some of his problems, and get some stuff off of his chest. Seokjin is a nice person. It wouldn't hurt to confide in him. He must be making Seokjin stressed, not telling him anything, and acting out when Seokjin is to care for him. "I don't like the house," he starts. "I prefer the little house which is more like a shed, to be honest," he continues. "I like it better though because I'm not alone." 

 

'I have you with me,' he thinks but doesn't say. 

 

"I also don't like the house because it reminds me of my alpha father. I feel guilty when I think of him," he bites his lip to keep it from trembling. "How could I not feel guilty when I'm the reason he's not around anymore," Taehyung's voice cracks and he has to pause. 

 

"Taehyung.." Seokjin begins but Taehyung continues. 

 

"I was a bad son," he confesses. "I blamed my alpha father for sending me away. I resented him, my only family left and now he's gone. I promised myself when I was abroad that I'd never return here. However, I couldn't keep that promise because I wanted to see my omega dad again. He loved nature and asked us to turn him into a tree when he passed so," he swallows, feeling a lump in his throat. "We gave him a tree pod burial, turning him into a maple tree."

 

"I'm sorry, Taehyung," Seokjin apologizes. 

 

"It's fine," Taehyung dismisses him. "You didn't know. I just..couldn't face my omega dad after what I did to my alpha father. He would be disappointed in me. He would hate me-"

 

"He doesn't hate you," Seokjin interrupts, placing a hand on his arm. 

 

"He does!" Taehyung turns around. "Why wouldn't he? I was driving that night." The familiar wet drops slide down his cheeks. "I disagreed with him and started the fight first. I wasn't a good son. I didn't listen to him. I-I," his bottom lip trembles. "I killed my father."

 

Taehyung can feel fresh tears wash his other tears away. "What kind of son kills their own father? It makes sense why I'm all alone now with no family. I will always be alone. I have been my whole life so it shouldn't be that different. Yet, this time it hurts because I know that it was solely my fault. I'm even blind too so I can't even see my omega dad. I can't see the world. I can't do anything. I'm just a useless body." Taehyung's breath hitches, "I wish I had just died in that car and taken my father's place-"

 

Suddenly, Seokjin pulls him into an embrace. "Don't," Seokjin's voice comes out shaky. "Don't wish that. It wasn't your fault," he says, voice still unstable. He presses his face into Taehyung's shoulder, making it wet and that's when Taehyung understands why he sounds the way he does. "Your parents don't blame you."

 

"Yes, they d-" Taehyung gets cut off before he can finish. 

 

"No, they don't. No one does except you," Seokjin pulls away slightly. "Don't blame yourself anymore, Taehyung." Seokjin presses his head against his chest. Though muffled he says, "I'm glad that you're here."

 

'You are?' Taehyung thinks, staggered. 

 

"Though you can't see with your eyes, you can still hear, smell, taste, and touch." Seokjin lifts his head off of his chest. "The world is still here and along with it, its beauty." Taehyung blinks, realizing that his tears are no longer. "I want to help show the beauty of the world to you if you'd let me."

 

Taehyung blinks again, trying to wake from sleep if he's dreaming. He blinks as he tries to see the person who's in front of him. Tentatively, he holds out his hand to meet the hand of the person with a heart of gold.

 

 

———————————————————

 

 

When Seokjin and Taehyung arrive back on the plantation, the sun has already set. "What do you want for dinner?"

 

"It doesn't matter," Taehyung answers. "Just make something delicious." 

 

Seokjin chuckles lightly, "Of course." It's quite warm out despite the sun's disappearance. An idea pops into his head. "How about we do barbecue night?" 

 

Taehyung perks up momentarily. "I would like that." 

 

Seokjin smiles and quickly leads Taehyung to the little house. Then he goes into the big house where he busies himself with cutting vegetables and prepping the meat to grill. 

 

He brings the food out onto the table outside, taking out the grill and coal. As he's starting the fire, he hears behind him, "Is there anything I can do to help?" 

 

"No, the grill is about ready," Seokjin tells Taehyung. After adding a few more coals, he says enthusiastically, "Okay~ Meat is on the grill~" He sits across from Taehyung, glancing at the meat now and then.

 

"Did you cook a lot before you came here?" Taehyung asks as they wait. 

 

"Not a lot," Seokjin answers. "I cooked here and there. I also helped my mom out a lot." Taehyung's lips form a thin line and Seokjin thinks he's going to bring up the topic of getting a cook again which he doesn't need to. So, he quickly speaks before he can, "Though inexperienced, cooking is relaxing so I don't mind it." 

 

Taehyung's face softens. "I like your food. Thank you for cooking for me," he appreciates. 

 

"You're welcome," Seokjin replies. The compliment shoots straight to his heart. 

 

Soon, they're eating and exchanging words every now and then. Seokjin pays more attention to Taehyung than he does the food, his mind still lingering on earlier's events. He doesn't seem as stressed and worried anymore. His cheeks are full of meat and every time he takes a big bite, his eyes enlarge. The sight makes Seokjin smile.

 

"You should eat veggies too," Seokjin comments as Taehyung reaches for more meat.

 

Taehyung swallows, "I'll pass for tonight." 

 

Seokjin laughs, shaking his head. He puts a slice of meat onto a piece of lettuce, wrapping it nicely. "I made a lettuce wrap for you," he tells the alpha. 

 

Seokjin goes to place it on his plate but before he can, Taehyung's lips part. For a second, Seokjin thinks he has something to say but the second passes and his mouth is still open.

 

Shyly, in case he's interpreting this wrong, he brings his chopsticks holding the lettuce wrap up to Taehyung's lips. It brushes Taehyung's lips before Taehyung takes a bite, relieving Seokjin. 

 

As Taehyung chews, Seokjin looks away, ignoring how flustered he is at feeding him. He busies his eyes and hands on the food in front of him, feeding himself. 

 

"Can you pass me the lettuce?" Taehyung asks, forcing Seokjin out of his own world. 

 

"Sure," Seokjin says in return, grabbing the plate of lettuce. He sets it down in front of Taehyung's left hand, guiding Taehyung's hand down to the plate. 

 

"Thanks," Taehyung thanks, picking up a piece of lettuce. He fumbles a little bit at first but soon completes his lettuce wrap, finishing it in his mouth. 

 

Seokjin goes back to eating. "Is there water?" Taehyung asks.

 

"Yeah, I'll get it," Seokjin gets up, going to the kitchen. He grabs the water pitcher and cups. When he comes out, Taehyung is standing by the table. 

 

"Let me help you," Taehyung offers, holding his hands out. 

 

"It's fine," Seokjin declines. "I got it." He pours some into a cup and then gives it to Taehyung who chugs it, finishing it in the blink of an eye. 

 

"Thanks for the meal," Taehyung sets the cup down. "I'll go back to the little house first." 

 

"Um..okay," Seokjin says, confused by his hurried ness. Taehyung extends his walking stick before making his way to the small house. 

 

Seokjin goes back to the table, no longer hungry. He picks up Taehyung's empty plate, then his own. Seokjin tilts his head, bewildered by the lettuce wrap on his plate. 

 

Before getting up to get Taehyung water, he had eaten the last thing on his plate. It shouldn't have anything on it. Yet, it does? Seokjin stares at the lettuce wrap, trying to recall if he had made one before he left but coming to the conclusion that he didn't. So who did?

 

'Could it be...' Seokjin recalls the hurried alpha. He can't conceal the smile on his lips as he eats the lettuce wrap Taehyung made for him.

 

 

———————————————————

 

 

Taehyung closes the door after him before sinking to the ground. He brings his hands to cup his cheeks, feeling their warmth. Did he just make Seokjin a lettuce wrap? Yes, yes he did. Why did he do it? After confiding in Seokjin about everything, Taehyung realizes that he has been treating him horribly. He's surprised that Seokjin has not left him yet out of frustration. 

 

Taehyung sighs as he recalls crying in front of Seokjin just moments earlier. Though a little embarrassed, he doesn't regret telling him everything because he can finally breathe now, no longer suffocated by his thoughts. It was also nice to hear words of comfort. 

 

After taking a shower and brushing his teeth, Taehyung changes into his pajamas. As he's buttoning up his shirt, he realizes that Seokjin hangs all of his clothes in a pair. When he goes to change into an outfit, a shirt and a pair of pants are hung together, all ready for him. For some reason, he failed to notice this until now. 

 

Another tiny detail Taehyung failed to notice until now is how the toothpaste and lotion in the bathrooms are different. Their containers used to be the same size and felt completely the same. Both were also stored in the mirror cabinet, placed next to each other. Taehyung had the unfortunate mistake of brushing his teeth with lotion or applying toothpaste to his hands a few times. 

 

However, now, the lotion's container changed and the toothpaste isn't in the mirror cabinet anymore. Seokjin changed it for him. 

 

 

———————————————————

 

 

"This is the picnic table," Taehyung notes, hands touching it. 

 

"Yup," Seokjin answers him. 

 

"So.." Taehyung stands up straighter. "That's the house," he points in the wrong direction. 

 

"Close," Seokjin walks up to him. His fingers circle Taehyung's wrist before directing him in the right direction. "That's the house."

 

"Oh," Taehyung's shoulders slump, disappointed. 

 

"Don't worry. We can keep practicing," Seokjin reassures him. 

 

"You're not bored?" Taehyung asks.

 

"No," Seokjin answers, guiding Taehyung back to the little house. "You're improving so how could I be bored?" Taehyung doesn't reply as Seokjin spins him around three times.

 

"Now, try to find your way back to the big house," Seokjin tells him, stepping away.

 

Taehyung taps the ground around him with his white cane. Slowly, he starts to move towards the big house. As he's navigating, the doorbell of the big house rings. 

 

"I'll get it," Seokjin says. "Keep trying to find the big house. I'll be right back." He darts inside the kitchen and then to the front door. 

 

"Hey, Jungkook," Seokjin greets the familiar beta when he opens the door. 

 

"Hey," Jungkook's face lights up into a smile. "There's a festival happening tomorrow night. There's going to be lots of food, games, prizes, etc. Would you like to come with me?" 

 

Seokjin's first thought is, 'What about Taehyung?' 

 

Jungkook must've seen his hesitance because he adds, "You promised me you won't turn me down." 

 

"Right, I did.." Seokjin forgot about that. He indeed promised Jungkook that. Would it be rude to ask if Taehyung could come along? 

 

"I'll go with you," Seokjin tells Jungkook. He's not a man who goes back on his words. 

 

"Great," Jungkook beams. "I'll pick you up at nineteen o'clock." 

 

"Okay," Seokjin smiles for the beta's smile is contagious.

 

"Bye," Jungkook bids him, even giving a little wave as he leaves. He gets to his red truck but doesn't get in. Instead, he turns around and waves at Seokjin again. Seokjin waves back. Only then, does the beta get in his car and drives away. 

 

Seokjin closes the front door, wondering how he should tell Taehyung he'll be going out. He turns around to go back out but meets Taehyung instead. "Oh, Taehyung. When did you get here?" Seokjin asks, puzzled.

 

"A while ago," Taehyung says. "How long will you be out with Jungkook?" 

 

Seokjin rubs the back of his neck, suddenly feeling awkward. "I'm not sure." 

 

"Do you like him?" Taehyung asks, straightforwardly.

 

"Yeah, he's a nice beta," Seokjin doesn't understand why Taehyung is asking such. "He's my friend." 

 

"You know that he has a crush on you, right?" Taehyung says blatantly. 

 

"What?" Seokjin's eyes widen at Taehyung's implication.

 

"I don't need eyes to see that he's heart-eyes over you," Taehyung adds. "But it seems that you can't see the beta fawning over you." 

 

Seokjin thinks back to all of his interactions with Jungkook. They're just friends. At least, that's how Seokjin felt. 

 

"If you like him, reciprocate his feelings. He seems to care for you a lot," Taehyung advises. 

 

"He does?" Seokjin asks, not sure if heard the alpha correctly. "Anyhow, I'm marri-" he stops, remembering Taehyung's ban on the word, on the relationship. 

 

"I won't mind it if you find someone. After all, this marriage is only temporary. I wouldn't want to be standing in your way of being with..someone," Taehyung tells him, soft-spoken. 

 

Seokjin's head hangs a little at the reminder of their upcoming separation. 

 

"So you don't mind if I spend tomorrow evening with Jungkook?" Seokjin poses, hoping that Taehyung would mind.

 

"No, I don't mind," Taehyung simply answers, much to his dismay.

 

~~~~

 

"Try this," Jungkook says, offering Seokjin a kebab. 

 

"Thank you," Seokjin takes it. He munches on it as he and Jungkook continue weaving through the festival. 

 

At first, Seokjin wasn't sure how to feel. He kept on thinking about what Taehyung said but as time passed and Jungkook was still the same friendly beta, Seokjin let his worries fade.

 

"Ooh, they're doing some sort of dance over there," Seokjin points out, noticing a big crowd. 

 

"Let's go check it out," Jungkook says before moving towards the crowd. Seokjin follows him, struggling however as people cross them. He slows to let a few kids rush past him. 

 

He's sure he's lost Jungkook by now but he's wrong when Jungkook reaches a hand behind him, easily finding Seokjin's hand. He takes Seokjin's hand, leading him towards the dance.

 

Jungkook gasps as they finally reach their destination. "They're dancing with fire," he remarks. 

 

However, Seokjin is too busy looking at their connected hands. Their hands are together until the dance is over, causing Jungkook to pull away and applaud. Seokjin does the same. 

 

They continue walking around the festival, stopping at booths as they go. "Look at how pretty these bracelets are," Jungkook comments as they stop by a booth selling jewelry.

 

"Yeah, they are pretty," Seokjin agrees, picking a bracelet up and noticing its gleam as light hits it. He sets it back down but Jungkook continues to examine them until he finds one to his liking. 

 

"This one matches you," Jungkook tells him, putting the bracelet around his wrist. 

 

"Jungkook, I don't-"

 

"You two are such a lovely couple. I'll make it buy one, get one free just for you two so feel free to get matching bracelets," the vendor tells them. Seokjin's speechless at the assumption while Jungkook blushes. 

 

They end up buying the matching bracelets. The bracelet is gorgeous but it doesn't sit right on Seokjin's wrist.

 

"Look, it's a wishing well," Jungkook points out. He searches his pockets for coins but fails to find any.

 

"I have some coins if you want to make a wish," Seokjin tells him, producing them in his hands.

 

Jungkook smiles with his teeth showing, eyes crinkling. "Thanks, Seokjin," he thanks as he takes a coin. They walk over to the well. "You should make a wish too," the beta urges him.

 

"No, I'm good," Seokjin waves him off. "I'll just be moral support for your wish." This causes Jungkook to laugh. 

 

Jungkook closes his eyes, bringing his clasped hands with the coin inside up to his face as he makes a wish. He tosses the coin into the well and then opens his eyes. 

 

"What did you wish for?" Seokjin questions as they walk away from the well. 

 

"Just something," Jungkook mumbles.

 

This piques Seokjin's curiosity and he stops walking. "Ooh, tell me," he says excitedly.

 

Jungkook chuckles at his reaction, shaking his head. "I don't want to."

 

Seokjin pouts, "You're no fun." He turns away from the beta. 

 

"Fine," Jungkook gives up. He grabs Seokjin's wrist, stopping him from leaving. "Since you want to know so badly.." Seokjin turns around, facing Jungkook. Jungkook's eyes flicker away from him. "...I wished about you." 

 

Jungkook glances back at him, a blush noticeable on his cheeks. "I wished for us to get closer." He glances down at the ground. "I like you, Seokjin."

 

Seokjin stares shocked that Taehyung's prediction came true. He's reminded of Taehyung's permission, 'I won't mind it if you find someone. After all, this marriage is only temporary. I wouldn't want to be standing in your way of being with..someone.' 

 

Jungkook is a nice man. He's also handsome, charming, and cute. He's also only a beta. He's perfect for Seokjin. Yet, Seokjin doesn't like him as a potential mate. He only likes him as a friend. Another problem as well is that Seokjin already has feelings for someone else.

 

"I'm sorry, Jungkook," Seokjin apologizes. The beta's doe eyes stare back at him, becoming even wider and making Seokjin feel worse. "I don't see you that way. I see you as my friend," Seokjin pauses. Would it be selfish of him to want to be friends with Jungkook still?

 

"If you're fine with it, I'd like us to continue being friends," Seokjin speaks his mind. "However, if you're not, I understand." Jungkook turns his head away from Seokjin and for the first time, he's silent in front of Seokjin. 

 

The silence makes Seokjin apprehensive about what is to come. He doesn't want to lose Jungkook as a friend.

 

After what feels like a decade, Jungkook turns back to him. "Let's continue being friends." The corners of Jungkook's lips lift into a small smile. "I still want my wish to come true." 

 

Seokjin's eyes water a little but he pushes them away and returns the smiles. "I'll make sure that happens."

 

 

———————————————————

 

 

Taehyung listens closely as he hears what sounds like a car close by. He thinks it might be Jungkook's truck but it passes by and the silence accompanies his ears again. 

 

Taehyung tosses and turns in his blankets, wondering why sleep won't come to him. 

 

Seokjin's been gone a long time. It must be night by now. Taehyung turns onto his back. 'He might not come back,' his thoughts tell him. 'He might've taken your advice and confessed to Jungkook.' 

 

Taehyung squeezes his eyes shut, wishing to be in slumber already. He doesn't care about what happens with Seokjin and Jungkook. If they're not together, good. If they're together...good for them.

 

He just hopes Jungkook is a good person like he believes him to be. But, whatever, it's none of Taehyung's concern. He turns onto his side. 

 

'Jungkook definitely likes Seokjin. Does Seokjin like him?' Taehyung wonders in his head. 'Probably. Especially since Jungkook is kind, sociable, friendly, handsome(from my memory), cute, and not a handicap.'

 

Taehyung sighs. It doesn't matter what Jungkook is like or what Seokjin thinks of Jungkook. Yet, here he is, losing sleep over the topic. His ears perk up again as he hears another vehicle. This time it stops and from its low rumble, he infers that it's Jungkook's truck. 

 

Taehyung's first reaction is to pretend that he's been asleep when Seokjin comes in. His second reaction is to not pretend and ask Seokjin what he did with Jungkook. He runs through the questions he's going to ask and in which order he's going to do so as he waits for Seokjin to arrive. 

 

His preparation is cut short when the door opens. Taehyung is still lying in bed and subconsciously, he closes his eyes, throwing his plan out of the window. He hears Seokjin shuffle quietly as if to not wake him. After a while, Seokjin slips onto the mat next to him. 

 

"How was it?" Taehyung asks at last. 

 

"Oh-I didn't wake you, did I?" Seokjin asks, seeming flustered. 

 

"It's fine," Taehyung replies, instead of admitting that he's been awake. "Did you have fun?"

 

"It was pretty fun," Seokjin answers him. 

 

"Did he confess?" Taehyung interrogates, cutting to the chase.

 

"Yeah.." Seokjin speaks lowly. Taehyung almost scoffs at Jungkook's eagerness. "I turned him down, though." Taehyung's brows raised in question. He thought that Seokjin was sure to reciprocate Jungkook's feelings since they are always hanging out together and Jungkook was always visiting him. "I only like him as a friend." Taehyung presses his lips into a thin line, feeling relief. 

 

"Seokjin," he calls softly, liking the way Seokjin's name sounds with his voice. 

 

"Yes?" Seokjin replies. 

 

Taehyung pulls his hand out from under the blanket, reaching for the floor next to him. He grabs the plant rings he made today. "Give me your hand," he tells Seokjin who does so. His fingers encircle Seokjin's delicate wrist before tracing his way to his fingers and slipping the rings on gently. With Seokjin gone, Taehyung had nothing to do so he went around the plantation gathering plants and then weaving them into rings. 

 

Seokjin gasps, "You made so many." 

 

"I had a lot of free time," Taehyung his bottom lip. "Do you like them?" He has no idea what they look like so he hopes they look as pretty as they felt. 

 

"I do," he hears the smile in Seokjin's voice. He feels himself smile as well. "How are you so good at making these?"

 

Taehyung's abashed at the compliment but goes to answer Seokjin's question. "When I was sent abroad, I had a hard time making friends especially because of the language barrier." Somehow, he feels comfortable sharing this with Seokjin. "So during recess and break, I was by myself. I got tired of walking around and I sat down in this area with no one else. There was only overgrown grass so, with nothing to do, I picked them and just played with them. Until eventually I started weaving them into pretty crowns for squirrels and birds."

 

Seokjin giggles, "That's cute." Taehyung smiles at the bittersweet memory. "Anyhow, if I was there, I would be your friend." 

 

"Even if we couldn't understand each other?" Taehyung asks, going along with him. 

 

"Even if I didn't know one word you said," Seokjin states. "Besides, you don't always need words to understand each other." 

 

Taehyung turns his head to where Seokjin's voice is coming from. "I guess you're right," he agrees, allowing a smile to grace his lips, and even with no eyesight, he knows Seokjin is smiling too.

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