I’m sitting on my bed. My hands are shaking while holding my phone that hasn’t stop ringing since I arrived. I know I might’ve come out as rude because I didn’t acknowledge my members when I got home but now is not the time to think about that.
I’ll just apologize to them later.
On the screen of my phone is the number I’ve been wanting to call ever since I finished my schedule but doesn’t have the guts to.
Why is it so hard to call her? Why is it so hard to press that green button? And why… why is my first instinct to call her when my family is calling me non-stop?

It’s like I’m dreaming, I see you next to me

Joy is in front of her laptop watching their performance earlier. She knows she shouldn’t watch this to steer clear from the mean comments but she needs to so she can improve herself. Besides, she’s not there to read comments, she’s there to watch their performance.
Yet for some reason her eyes keep darting on the short-haired main vocalist of their group that she ended up just watching Wendy and not herself.
Joy’s eyes landed on the bundle of sunshine rolling allover her bed as if she’s spreading her scent on the bed. Tell her again why she’s wasting time watching a performance when the artist is right in front of her?
“Don’t you think you’re enjoying my bed a little too much?”
Wendy stops rolling and looks up from her phone, eyes round and big that resembles a lot like a hamster. “I can’t roll like this on my bed or else I’ll fall” A cheeky smile on her lips. “And it’s too comfortable”
Joy shuts down her laptop and approached the bed. She lay down beside Wendy, her bed is big enough for two people and yet she chooses to be close to Wendy. She lays on her side and Wendy immediately copied her, now they’re face to face.
A smile on both of their lips.
Joy really like it when she’s this close to Wendy.

I slowly open my eyes.
That… was the actual dream because I’m not staring straight into Wendy’s expressive brown orbs. I’m staring at a white wall and I’m alone.
How I wish that earlier was the dream and Wendy beside me is the reality. But we can’t always have what we want because as soon as I open my phone, reality drop on me like a boulder while I’m reading the statement our manager had composed and sent.
I’ve read enough and decided to put my phone down then drapes an arm over my forehead. “I’m sorry” a lone tear escape from my eyes.

When I think of you, my heart cries
My world falls apart

It was a couple of minutes later when I hear the front door opening. I quickly wipe my tears and quietly approach my door, opening it a little so I can hear what’s happening outside.
“Something wrong, Hyun?”
I hear Seulgi’s voice from the living room.
“Seungwan is not yet home”
“Seungwan? Doesn’t her schedule finish at 10?”
“And she always gets home at 11:00”
“Maybe she had dinner with the staff?”
Wendy is still not home.
I frowned.
I did check their group chat earlier and noticed that Wendy still hasn’t seen the last message.
Honestly, where is she? I still haven’t received any message from her. It was so uncharacteristic of her because news like this, I know she’ll be the first one to send me a message.
She still hasn’t checked up on me… she still hasn’t asked me how I’m doing.

I stayed up all night last night

I couldn’t sleep so decided to just read some articles. I wasn’t just reading articles about me, I was also reading articles about Wendy. And honestly, I don’t know what to feel. Should I feel relieved that some are being supportive? Or bad because I know I hurt someone?
What am I talking about?! If course I feel bad that someone is hurting because of me.
A sigh escaped my lips as I put my phone down.
It’s almost morning, we’ll be leaving in a couple of hours and yet I haven’t had any sleep.
I waited and waited but Seulgi’s arrival earlier was the last thing I heard which means the person I’m waiting for didn’t come home last night.
But no worries, I will see her later, that’s for sure.

♦♦♦

My sight immediately landed on her as I enter our waiting room. She’s on the couch, her eyes were close and I can see the earphones plugged inside her ear.<