Sakura's POV:

We are now at Sashi Okan's hotel room, eating a late dinner with her. She happened to have her own Hotel room at the Park Hotel, she treated us to tasty Japanese food. The thing about Sashi Okan is she is just like Chaen the way she treats me and the people around me extra special. She had the whole hotel room decorated with balloons and flowers all over the place for this dinner. Though we are only in our jogging pants and shirts, this didn't stop the older woman to still give us a welcoming party as she calls it. Thankfully Chaen was calm with her interactions with my Sashi Okan. Earlier at breakfast, Sashi even treated her like she's her own child. Giving her the same hug and kiss on the forehead as she gave me. Sashi was this way, she treats everyone like they were her child. Introducing her to my new team instantly made everyone at ease with her. They welcome her warmly and allowed us five to spend time with my honorary mother at the forty eight groups.

I watched as Sashi took care of everyone and served them all the food they could eat and an overflowing of drinks. Because most of the members are kids, Sashi made sure to give them non-alcoholic drinks and the elders of the group, specifically Chaewon, Eunbi Unnie, Chaeyeon, Ducky and Kwangbae weren't allowed to drink anything alcoholic or have a tongue lashing from me. Everyone of them had stopped drinking alcoholic beverages ever since I caught all five a month after we've announced live on national television the final line up of our group. We had a mini TV Show for that together with our other co-trainees. Oh the tongue lashing and infuriated shouting and screaming against the five of them had them cowering in fear of me.

I was seriously adamant about not drinking any alcoholic drinks and these five I have my eyes on. I already told Sashi even before meeting her that these five are permanently banned from drinking anything alcoholic. I recounted that first instance of the three drinking alcoholic drinks, all the mess Chaen made and her incessant crying when she's had one too many drinks. No way I'm allowing her to drink again, especially if she's a kid when drunk that you had to feed. I was raised well by my Obaasan and she was as adamant like I am. She once screamed her head off at my Oton for drinking a sip of alcohol. Just a sip and yet Obaasan screamed at him and managed to get the bottle from him. Obaasan said that alcoholic drinks are for hopeless people, to numb a pain they have within themselves, she said that instead of drinking any alcoholic drinks, meditation and talking to friends like Sashihara will help me ease all my pains and worries, nothing a comforting listener couldn't do for you. I guess Obaasan Emiko was right, alcoholic drinks are for people who doesn't know how to manage their pains. Like Chaen, who was lost by the death of her first ever love, Yerin and the infidelity of her other ex Giselle.

"Kku-chan, you're awfully quiet, what's going on in that pretty head of yours, c'mon, tell Okan about it." Sashi turns her attention to me as we both sat at her hotel's couch.

My eyes still at my kids, enjoying their dinner in hand.

"I'm happy to be here with you, Okan. I miss you so much, it's been five months since we've seen each other, when before all this we used to see each other every week." I told her sighing.

"We both needed to grow on our own terms, Kku-chan. You in Korea leading an idol life and I in Japan, leading my producer life. I would say you grew up so much, from being a little scrawny kid to being a K-Pop Idol, you've really grown beautifully." Sashi said to me and captured me in a side hug.

I sank myself in my Okan's arms. It's been five months since we last met personally and sit together like this.

"Thank you for always supporting me, Okan." I said to her.

"It's fine, do you remember the first time you met Chaen?" She asked me.

"I do." I replied to her.

"Did you know what I saw?" She asked me quietly.

"I don't, Okan, what was it you saw?" I asked her.

"I saw a lost kid, that very first time I saw her in one of our fan meetings for HKT48, but when she walked towards you and handed you the stuffed bear she got for you, she was full of purpose when it was time to walk up to you. She looked shiny with her braces and glasses. It was what I remembered, I also remember you protecting the stuffed bear with your life. You slept for a year holding that stuffed toy, until you came back home to Kagoshima and left that bear in your house. I may never know why she looked so lost, but I realized, she loved you enough to walk up to you with a purpose, to give you a stuffed toy that could comfort you while at the dorm. I'm really sorry for leaving the group and letting Matsui ruin your life. If I would've known she'll do that, I would've staye