Igniting a Heartbeat
 

You know you're my heart
Yeah, you know I'm about you
I hate when we're apart
'Cause I love me around you
And embraced all my flaws, when you didn't have to
Stay holdin' me down even when I'm not around

All Me Kehlani ft. Keyshia Cole
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"Good Morning, Dahon! Kamusta naman ang pag-uusap niyo ni ate Karina kahapon? Boom rhymes! One, two, three, abc."

 

 

 

The moment I stepped into our classroom's front corridor, mga bwesit na chismosang pagmumukha na agad nila Ryujin at Yuna ang bumungad sa'kin, all while wearing the same expression on their faces– nakangisi at puno ng panunukso. Which is a look that truly indicates na hindi nila ako titigilan para sa pinakamamahal na chismis nila haha.

 

 

 

I chuckled a little as I pinched the bridge of my nose, bracing myself for what's about to go down later. But before that, pumunta muna tayo sa kanina. So ayun nga, earlier, I finally shared my past to my beloved girlfriend, my Karina.

 

 

 

And I'm just so glad that I did because at last, for once in my life, I felt so much better, and so much lighter. Like all the heavy burdens that I've been carrying around behind my back for the past how many years, has finally been lifted off from me.

 

 

 

Not just that, nagpapasalamat din ako dahil tinanggap niya pa rin ako ng buong-buo despite knowing everything.

 

 

 

Hindi ko naman ikinakahiya ang nakaraan ko. But I'm also not proud of it. I mean, who would be proud to experienced such things, right? I know I'm not.

 

 

 

Pero, it's what also defines me, as me eh. At kung hindi dahil sa mga karanasang napagdaanan ko noon, then, I wouldn't be the person that I am today– stronger, and better in all aspects.

 

 

 

Looking back, hindi ko din alam kung paano ko nakayanan ang lahat-lahat ng nangyari sa'kin. But then, I remembered one thing, si Lord.

 

 

 

Sakanya lang talaga ako kumakapit at kumukuha ng lakas sa mga panahong 'yun at kahit magpanghanggang ngayon.

 

 

 

Naaalala ko pa nga dati, walang palya akong pumupunta sa Simbahan noon para magdasal. Walang ni araw na hindi ako dadayo. Well... except sa mga araw na sobrang nabu-bugbog talaga ako nila Tita at ng mga palamunin at walang kwenta niyang mga anak.

 

 

 

Hindi na kasi ako niyan makagalaw ng maayos dahil ayun nga, masakit ang buong katawan ko. Atsaka, may pagkamalayo din ang Simbahan mula sa bahay nila Tita at palagi ko lang ding nilalakad papunta doon. Kaya no-show talaga ako kapag nasa mga ganitong klaseng sitwasyon.

 

 

 

Kapag nakakapunta naman ako sa Simbahan, ang tanging ipinagdadasal ko lang talaga noon ay sana, bigyan niya'ko ng sapat na lakas ng loob para ipagpatuloy pa ang mabuhay araw-araw. Kasi araw-araw din akong pinanghihinaan ng loob na mabuhay 'non eh.

 

 

 

Because what's the purpose diba? Kung puros pasakit lang din naman ang matatamo ko sa pang-araw-araw na mabubuhay ako, then siguro, mas mabuti nalang talaga na mawala nalang ako sa mundong ito.

 

 

 

Pero mabuti nalang, na sa tuwing naiisipan ko na kitilin ang buhay ko, ay nakakaiisip din ako ng mga isandaan pang magagandang dahilan para huwag na itong gawin at ituloy.

 

 

 

I've realized na may mga pangarap pa pala ako sa buhay na gustong-gusto ko matupad. I still wanted to become a Doctor. My reason? Dahil isang doktor din ang sumagip sa'kin noon mula sa bingit ng kamatayan. It was when I got stabbed by my boss.

 

 

 

Nandoon na'ko sa puntong inaakala ko na mawawala na talaga ako sa mundong ibabaw na 'to, but it didn't happened. And instead, I was given yet another chance to live.

 

 

 

Kaya 'ayun. I also want to give the people– especially, people like me, a second chance to live their lives.

 

 

 

Pangalawa, gusto ko pang magmahal at mag-asawa. Alam kong it sounds absurd coming from someone who wasn't loved well as a child haha. Pero I can guarantee that I will never be like those people. Dahil alam kong sa sarili ko na I can be a great lover and a loving parent at the same time.

 

 

 

Pero, ang ibig ko lang talagang sabihin ay, gusto ko pang mahalin, asawahin, magka-anak at magka-apo kay Karina. Dahil sa totoo lang, siya lang naman ang nagbubukod-tanging dahilan kung bakit nabuo ang pangalawang pangarap ko na'to.

 

 

 

In short, Karina Ellyse Riego also became my dream– a very beautiful dream that thankfully, has come true.

 

 

 

"Corny mo, Jinjin! Dun ka nga!" Going back, I was woken up from my flashback when I saw Yuna lightly pushed Ryujin's face to the side kaya napatagilid ito at muntik nang ma-outbalanced at madapa. Mabuti nalang talaga at naka-kapit siya kaagad sa may edge ng pintuan ng classroom namin.

 

 

 

"Gago! Muntik na'ko mamatay, Yuna!" Oa at puno ng eksaherasyong reklamo nito sa kaibigan, who only laughed at her in return.

 

 

 

Hayna'ko. I simply sighed and shook my head atsaka walang pakundanga'y pumasok na sa loob ng classroom bago pa nila ako mahuli.

 

 

 

"Hoy, hoy, hoy! Umaalis na ang target!" Narinig kong sigaw ng mokong. "I repeat, umaalis na ang target!"

 

 

 

"Roger that!" I was halfway close to my chair, nang bigla naman akong makaramdaman na may pumatong na dalawang kamay sa magkabilaang balikat ko– it was Yuna's– hindering me to move another step.

 

 

 

"What-"

 

 

 

"Target locked!" Mariing sigaw ni Yuna and I can only chuckle in defeat, accepting my fate.

 

 

 

"Bringing to base now." Hindi na'ko nakapalag pa nang masimulang lumakad si Yuna habang hawak-hawak pa din ang mga balikat ko. She was holding onto my shoulders firmly, para hindi na'ko makawala pa.

 

 

 

Mga ilang segundo pa'y nakarating na kami sa pwesto nila Ningning– at the teacher's table, and she was the one seating on the chair. I bit my lip, stopping myself to laugh out loud.

 

 

 

Jusko, mabuti nalang talaga at wala pa 'yung iba naming mga kaklase kundi nakakahiya talaga ang mga pinang-gagagawa namin ngayon.

 

 

 

Yuna instructed me to sit down in front of Ningning, and as I was doing that, I was also trying my best to look serious by pursing my lips pero ampota, natatawa talaga ako ngayon!

 

 

 

Chaeryoung and Lia were behind Ningning na para bang mga bodyguards niya ito– with their hands behind their backs, feet apart, chest puffed and eyes looking straight ahead. Not to mention, ang tuwid-tuwid din ng tayo nila. Like a Divisoria version of a typical stiff soldier.

 

 

 

Putcha, ba't ang laughtrip nila ngayon? Haha!

 

 

 

But that also explains a lot kung bakit mahal na mahal ko sila. Because everyday with them is fun.  Because everyday with them feels safe and comfortable. And because everyday with them feels like I finally truly belong.

 

 

 

"Alpha leader, Yizhuo. The target is now in question."
I sniffled a laugh, bringing my hands to cover my mouth, and my whole face na din dahil konting-konti nalang talaga, hahagalpak na'ko sa tawa.

 

 

 

"Very good, soldiers. You can now rest easy." Seryosong sambit ni Ningning atsaka nag-salute pa ang gaga. Ryujin and Yuna also did the same in return. Then, tumayo na sila sa magkabilaang side ko, also copying the couple's action.

 

 

 

Ningning then cleared to gather my attention kaya napatingin naman ako sakanya. Masinsinan pa kaming nakipaglabanan ng tingin, before finally bursting into a loud laughter.

 

 

 

Hindi ko na napigilan punyeta!

 

 

 

"Putcha! Character break muna! Hindi ko matake beh!" She shouted as she stood up while holding onto her stomach, all while laughing loudly.

 

 

 

"Ano na naman bang kalokohan to!?" I asked habang pinipigilang maluha kakatawa. Ayoko na, my goodness!

 

 

 

"I-interogahin ka namin, Leafy." She answered, clearing once again atsaka umupo pabalik sa pwesto niya. "Okay. Back into character na."

 

 

 

I only shook my head in amusement. Hayna'ko. Ano bang gagawin ko sa mga 'to?

 

 

 

"Okay. So Miss Winter Leafy Reyes, do you know why you're here?" She started, being one hundred percent serious into her character. Hmm, pwedeng-pwede nang isabak sa Star Magic 'to haha.

 

 

 

I cleared my throat. "Uhm, no?"

 

 

 

"Ba't hindi ka sure?"

 

 

 

"Kasi hindi naman talaga. Ano ba 'to?"

 

 

 

"Miss Winter Leafy Reyes." Tawag niya ulit sa'kin.
May kinuha pa siyang mga papel mula sa brown long folder na nasa harapan niya atsaka kunwaring binasa-basa ang mga nakalagay dito. Eh halata namang puros drawing lang 'yun ni Ryujin. "Before we ask you some series of serious questions, tatanungin muna namin ang mga basic info mo. Would that be okay?– sumagot ka ng oo, Leaf."

 

 

 

I laughed. "Oo, leaf." I teased kaya napasimangot siya.

 

 

 

"Hindi talaga tayo matatapos-tapos dito. Sige ka."

 

 

 

"Oo na." Matino kong sagot this time. 

 

 

 

"Okay. Full name?"

 

 

 

"Winter Leafy Reyes."

 

 

 

"Naks. Pogi naman ng name. Date of birth?"

 

 

 

"January 1, 2003."

 

 

 

"Favorite color?"

 

 

 

"Blue po."

 

 

 

"Okay. Last na." Umupo siya ng maayos, atsaka
itinungtung ang mga braso sa lamesa't pinagsalikop ang mga kamay, pagkatapos ay tinignan ako ng masinsinan. "What's your current relationship status?"

 

 

 

Ayan na nga'bang sinasabi ko amp. And like as if on cue, I laughed loudly as I threw my head back. Tangina. Kita mo na. Gumawa pa talaga ng ganitong klaseng kalokohan para lamang malaman ang relationship status ko ngayon haha.

 

 

 

Matapos mahimasmasan mula sa pagkakatawa, I took a deep sigh before answering. 

 

 

 

"I'm..." I paused a bit for a dramatic effect atsaka bumuntong hininga while they all looked at me, eyes full of anticipation and body leaning forward in expectation. "In a relationship." Ngumiti ako, finally dropping what they want to hear.

 

 

 

"Ahhh! Finally!" Ningning immediately stood up and threw the papers in the air causing it to be scattered on the floor afterwards. Gago to haha. Then, walang pag-alinlangan siyang tumakbo papunta sakin para yakapin ako. "I officially welcome you to the Ate Club, Leafy!" Sigaw niya pa at nagsimulang tumalon-talon kaya napapatalon na din ako.

 

 

 

Naiinggit naman ang iba kaya sumunod din sila at nakiyakap haha. And now, we were balled up into a group hug with me being in the middle while also jumping in circles.

 

 

 

"Salamat, Lord!"

 

 

 

"Congrats!"

 

 

 

"Yes naman!"

 

 

 

"Happy Birthday!"

 

 

 

"Anong happy birthday? Bonak!"

 

 

 

I chuckled at their simple cheer of joy. Ang su-supportive naman.

 

 

 

As I was starting to enjoy their sweet embrace, I felt like someone was staring at my neck.

 

 

 

"Teka, ano to? Kagat ng insekto?" I instantly paused at automatikong nanlaki ang mga mata ng mabilis na hinawi ni Ryujin ang buhok ko.

 

 

 

"Hala! Chickens ba'to, Leafy?!"

 

 

 

"Oh my god, Hockeys! HAHAHAHA!"

 

 

 

"Hashtag Winter Leafy Reyes second win! Yey!"

 

 

 

Dali-dali naman akong kumalas mula sa yakapan namin at mabilis na tumingin sa paligid. Nak ng potchi. Buti nalang talaga at wala pa 'yung ibang mga kaklase namin!

 

 

 

"We were not gonna ask for the full details pero wow, ate Karina. Just wow." Namamanghang saad ni Lia. "Tatlo para I love you daw ba, Leaf?"

 

 

 

"Lia, bibig mo!" Namumulang saway ko.

 

 

 

"Ganyan ka din naman sa'kin, Baby ah." Tukso ni Chaeryoung but Lia just shrugged like as if wala siyang paki-alam na ma-expose. "Madami pa nga kasi mahal na mahal mo'ko sobra.

 

 

 

"True naman." Proud pa nitong sabat and I only shook my head. Kahit kailan talaga itong mag-jowa na'to. Pero somehow, totoo naman ang sinabi nila.

 

 

 

Kay Karina nga, madami din akong ibinigay na pagmamahal kagabi, bwahaha! Not to mention, love na love ko din si Mingming ko hihi.

 

 

 

"Ang kakalat niyo uy! At dahil diyan, kayo ang magwawalis ng mga kalat sa sahig!" Natatawang utos ni Ningning kaya napailing na lamang ako. They're chaotic, but a good kind of chaotic. Just exactly the kind of people I need in my life.

 

 

 

A couple of weeks had past at nandito na naman kami ulit ngayon sa bahay nila Yuna. Magsisimula na kasi kami sa phase 4 ng research invention namin– practicing for our report. Kumbaga, magma-mock practice na kami ngayon. Samakalawa, Monday, na din kasi ang defense namin and we want everything to be perfect.

 

 

 

Pero aside from us, meron din kaming ibang kasama ngayon. Our special guests as what Ningning would like to call them. And speaking of that now, I returned my gaze to my side, only to smile dreamily when I saw my beautiful girlfriend silently reading our research.

 

 

 

Yes, you heard it right. My girlfriend, along with her friends, ang tatayong practice panelist namin ngayon.

 

 

 

It was Ningning's crazy idea to begin with. Apparently, they also did the same thing last year, back in grade 11. Hindi ko pa kasi sila classmate 'non kaya wala pa akong alam tungkol sa mga kaganapan nila sa buhay. Pero sa pagkakatanda ko, 'yung grupo nila ang nanalo last year for the best in research award.

 

 

 

"I repeat, sigurado na ba talaga kayo sa mga desisyon niyo sa buhay?" Natatawang tanong ni Ate Irene sa'min. She was holding a red ballpen in her right hand for corrections, habang nasa kaliwang kamay naman niya ang paper namin.

 

 

 

"Medyo haha." Ningning jokingly answered habang nagse-set up ng laptop niya. Ikakabit pa kasi ito sa projector.

 

 

 

"Basta walang iyakan mamaya ha." Ate Jennie voiced out, obviously teasing us. "May umiyak kasing nagnga-ngalang Ryujin Samaniego noong nakaraang mock practice din natin eh." She continued kaya napatawa kami.

 

 

 

"Hindi pa kasi ako ready 'nun, Ate!" Nahihiyang angal agad ng kaibigan ko.

 

 

 

"Weh? Tinanong ka lang ng what's the purpose of your research eh tas ngumawa ka na agad." Ate Jennie retaliated back, teasing even more.

 

 

 

"Nakakatakot ka kasi tumingin, ate! Parang mangangagat! Kaya kinabahan talaga ako!" Ryujin hissed back kaya napataas naman ang kilay ni Ate Jennie. Uh-oh.

 

 

 

"Ah ganon? Sige, wait ka lang mamaya ha, haha. Mangangagat pala ah."

 

 

 

"Ate Jennie naman eh!"

 

 

 

"That's Miss Bianchi for you, Miss Samaniego."

 

 

 

"Wala pa nga eh!"

 

 

 

I just shook my head at their light banter, chuckling. Then, I began to raise myself up from my chair. Pupunta lang akong cr. Naiihi na kasi ako kanina pa.

 

 

 

I was about to go when I felt my girlfriend's familiar soft hands on my own, stopping me from my movement.

 

 

 

"Where are you going, Baby?" Malambing na tanong nito sa'kin with a soft pout sporting on her lips. Napakagat naman ako sa sariling labi, gulping, when I felt my own heartbeat going crazy again just for this lovely sight alone.

 

 

 

Damn, she's so adorable. And she's all mine.

 

 

 

"Cr lang ako, Mahal." I responded in the same sweet tone while gently her cheeks with my hand, smiling almost immediately when she snuggled sweetly into my touch.

 

 

 

Napapasigaw na lamang ako sa isipan. Ang cute! Putcha, mahal na mahal ko talaga itong Mahal ko, Lord!

 

 

 

"Oh okiee. Sama ako." I raised my brows as a knowing smirk began to form on my lips.

 

 

 

"Done ka na ba diyan?" Tanong ko habang unti-unting pinagsalikop ang mga kamay naming dalawa, pagkatapos ay itinaas ito para bigyan ng isang masugid na halik.

 

 

 

"Kanina pa honestly." She answered atsaka tumayo na.

 

 

 

"Hmm, okay." I smiled. "Teka, cr lang kami guys ha." Paalam ko sa mga kasamahan namin na umani naman ng samot-saring ekspresyon galing sakanila.

 

 

 

"Leafy, Ate Karina," Ryujin uttered seriously kaya napatigil at napatingin kaming dalawa ni Rina sakanya.

 

 

 

"Ano 'yun, Ryujin?"

 

 

 

"Leafy, Ate Rina, basta palagi niyong tatandaan na hindi kayo basta-basta cr lang. Kaya don't say na 'cr lang kami' kasi you two are more than that. You two are the most wonderful people in our lives and we appreciate you so much. Atsaka, hindi biro ang maging cr pero kinaya niyo. It must've been tough pero you guys still did it and even became stronger for that matter. Kaya proud na proud kami sainyo."

 

 

 

Putangina?

 

 

 

It went silent after that. And then, naramdaman ko ang mahihinang pagpisil ng Mahal ko sa magkahawak naming kamay along with her gentle snickers.

 

 

 

"Tangina mo talaga, Ryujin!" Nagising lang kaming lahat sa diwa nang biglang tumawa ng malakas si Yuna habang hinagisan ng unan ang gunggong. Sakto sa mukha. Buti naman.

 

 

 

"Aray!" Sigaw nito pabalik habang sapo-sapo ang mukha. "Kapag ako talaga pumangit ng dahil don, Yuna! Sinasabi ko sa'yo, hindi kana sisikatan ng araw!"

 

 

 

"Ulul! Shabu pa!" Hinampas siya ulit ng isa. "Atsaka, huwag kang mag-alala. Hindi ka papangit ng dahil lang don no! Kasi unang-una palang, pangit ka na talaga! Kumbaga, natural na kapangitan mo! Bwahaha!"

 

 

 

"Hey! My Jinjin's not panget kaya, Yuna! In fact, she's the most super tangina nga eh!" We laughed when Ate Yeji went to aid Ryujin kaya tuwang-tuwa naman si Gago.

 

 

 

"Hahahaha! Way to go, Conyong singkit. Way to go." Proud na pumalapak pa ito kaya napangiti naman ng malapad si Ate Yeji.

 

 

 

Ay ewan ko nalang talaga. Hindi ko alam kung matatawa ako dahil sinabihan ni ate Yeji si Ryujin na 'the most super tangina', o maawa dahil mukhang tinanggap na ni Ryujin na pogi talaga ang meaning 'non.

 

 

 

Yuna made a face. "Ay? Ano 'to? De wala na, corny na."

 

 

 

"Hahaha! Wala ka lang tagapagtanggol eh! Kawawa ka naman. Bleh!"

 

 

 

"Pangit niyo! Ate Yeji, do you know that 'Tangina' atually mea–" Dali-daling nanlaki ang mga mata ni Ryujin atsaka mabilis na tinakpan ang bibig ni Yuna, scowling.

 

 

 

"Tatahimik ka o papatahimikin kit– aray! Ba't ka nangangat ha?!"

 

 

 

"Ambaho ng kamay mo gago! Saan mo ba isinuot 'yan ha?!"

 

 

 

"Aba't!"

 

 

 

"Yuck! Pangit na nga, mabaho pa! Ate Yeji, huwag mo na nga'ng jowain 'to para iwas maling desisyon sa buhay!" Mabuti nalang talaga at hindi pa masyadong nakaka-intindi si Ate Yeji haha.

 

 

 

"Aba, putangina mo ah!" At naghampasan na nga sila ng unan. Hinayaan nalang sila ng iba naming kasama. Sanay na sanay na kasi kaya dedma nalang talaga. Well... that is, except for Ate Yeji who was actually cheering for Ryujin.

 

 

 

"Haha. Let's go na, Babe?" I automatically shivered when my girlfriend whispered right into my ear as she gently brushed her lips over my earlobe. Kaya agad naman akong napatango at nagpatangay sakanya palabas.

 

 

 

My stupid but super loveable best friends can wait.

 

 

 

We arrived at the guest bedroom at dali-dali naman kaming pumasok ng girlfriend ko sa loob. I went straight to the cr para umihi while my gorgeous girlfriend just plainly sat on the soft mattress, as she waits for me to come out.

 

 

 

After I'm done peeing and washing my hands clean, tumingin muna ako sa salamin atsaka pinagtuunan ng pansin ang sarili, making sure that I looked good enough dahi