Ang Pag-amin

Shy Type
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“Karina. Pwede ba tayong mag-usap?” 

 

Winter looked nervous. Scared even. She was gripping the steering wheel too hard, her knuckles were turning white. Nakakunot ang noo niya while she looked at me. Actually, her eyes were dancing around from my face to the window behind me.

 

Parang hindi siya mapakali. 

 

“Please?” She pleaded.

 

“Right now?” I asked, curious. I didn’t have enough time if she wanted to talk right now. My class was starting soon and so was hers. What kind of talk ba ang gusto niya with so little time? 

 

“Uhm no, mamaya. End of day? Pwede ba kitang kausapin?” She looked at me expectantly. “Sorry, may gagawin ka ba?” 

 

“I’m not sure,” I excused.

 

“Hintayin kita?” She asked. “Gusto lang sana talaga kitang makausap.” 

 

“You can tell me now, Winter.” 

 

“Baka kasi mahaba? Gusto ko rin mag sorry sayo and malapit na rin class mo, may class rin ako. Ayoko naman na mag-isip ka ng kung ano-ano habang may class.”

 

I thought about it for a while. Bakit mahaba ang pag-uusapan namin if she’s just going to say sorry? She could just do it now so we can move forward. At what does she mean na mag-iisip pa ako ng kung ano-ano if we talked now? I mean, I would still be thinking about it dahil hindi pa niya masabi ang gusto niyang sabihin. I’d still be bothered.

 

“Please?” She pleaded again. 

 

I sighed. “I guess I can talk later,” I just said. Gusto ko rin naman siyang kausapin. I guess I was just surprised that she approached me even though I knew this was coming. Everyone hinted about it sa party. 

 

Her face beamed when I agreed. Nawala yung nervousness sa mukha niya. She looked optimistic. And all I could think about was how much I had actually missed seeing her face.

 

Yes, because for some reason, whenever her face lights up like a really happy puppy, it’s quite infectious.

 

“Thank you,” she breathed. 

 

I reached for my bag in the backseat and was about to leave pero hinila ni Winter yung bag ko to stop me. It’s the same thing she did the first time she ignored me. 

 

“Karina, I’m sorry.” She was looking down. Nakahawak pa rin siya sa bag ko. “Gusto ko lang sabihin sayo yun first. Sorry sa ginawa ko last week.” 

 

Inalis na niya yung hawak niya sa bag ko but she was still looking down. There was a minute of silence between us before she finally looked at me. And I saw na mukha naman sincere siya sa pag-apologize. 

 

I nodded and opened the door. “Okay. I’ll talk to you later na lang.” And then I walked to my class. 

 

I mulled over what transpired this morning on my way to class. Hindi naman sa hindi ko gusto yung nangyari, I was actually glad that Winter finally approached me. Nagulat lang talaga ako. And nakakapanibago rin that she’s talking to me again. 

 

But at the same time, I wasn’t sure if I was prepared for our talk. If it was anything like what happened at the library, I don’t think I would be able to handle another one of those. It’s like a feeling of being rejected lang? What if sabihin niya nga na she doesn’t want to be friends with me and this talk will be her finally telling me why? 

 

Right?

 

Pero. 

 

Natutuwa si Yuyu. Pati na rin sila Giselle. So maybe this talk would be a good thing? 

 

Was I going to confess to Winter that I like her? I don’t know. It’s not part of the plan. I guess I’ll see how the talk will go.

 

And if I do end up telling her how I feel, I don’t expect her to reciprocate. 

 

When I got to class, Giselle and Lia were already there. Naupo ako and turned to them. 

 

“Winter picked me up this morning.” I deadpanned.

 

Kinilig si Giselle. Tumili siya. She screeched so loud, napatingin yung ibang kaklase sa amin. So, I shushed her. Lia was just eyeing me but there was mirth in her eyes.

 

“And then what happened?” Giselle asked like parang bata sa sleepover. Her eyes twinkled while waiting for me to talk. 

 

I just looked at her funny. “Nothing?” 

 

She gasped. “You didn’t talk?” 

 

“She asked if we could talk.” 

 

“And?” 

 

“I said okay.” 

 

Giselle squealed in her seat. Lia beamed at me. “That’s great, KK!” 

 

“Do you know something?” I raised my brow suspiciously at her. 

 

“I do,” she gushed. “But you two talk. You need this talk. It’s long overdue. Trust me.” 

 

Lia just agreed, nodding along. “Yup. You need to clear the air, KK, and get yourself that girl!” She winked.

 

I rolled my eyes. “As if. Ayokong pangunahan.” 

 

Giselle just grinned. If I didn’t know any better, mas gusto niya yatang siya kumausap kay Winter. Because she was so excited. 

 

If I were a bit nervous during class, Giselle was the complete opposite. She couldn’t stay still. Ang hyper niya lang. She was thrilled at the thought of me and Winter talking. I told them na mamaya pa yung usapan namin at the end of the day and she was saying how it was so perfect kasi we won’t really be thinking about anything else. And we could talk properly and maybe after Winter can drop me home since I didn’t bring my car.

 

She had it all planned out. Siya na lang kaya makipag-usap kay Winter? She wrote a whole drama in her head with me and Winter as the characters. Plus, I think she was just getting ahead of herself naman. 

 

Her optimism about the whole thing gave me an idea na our talk would be good. But I don’t think I should let my guard down. 

 

Anything could happen. 

 

Ayokong umasa.

 

I thought about how I should act around Winter later. There was an air of awkwardness around us again. Especially since it was obvious na nahihiya si Winter sa akin. She used to talk to me so confidently pero ngayon, medyo may pagka-alinlangan. And I just have a small feeling na nahihiya siya dahil sa ginawa niya. 

 

Guilt maybe? 

 

And kahit na tinitignan niya ako, her eyes would flit from my face to something else behind me or on the ground.

 

There must be a million things going on in her head. Sabi pa niya mamaya daw mag-usap para wala kaming iisipin but it’s just quite the opposite. 

 

Iniisip ko siya. And the things that might happen later on. 

 

Sa kakaisip ko sa kanya, I unconsciously smiled when I received a text from her. 

 

I realized then na nakakamiss yung mga cute emojis niyang ginagamit. 




[2:15pm, Monday] Winter: hi (❁´◡`❁)

[2:15pm, Monday] Winter: okay lang if magkita tayo sa tapat ng graduate faculty?



My eyebrows knitted in confusion. Interesting choice. 



[2:17pm, Monday] Karina: sure 



[2:18pm, Monday] Winter: sunduin kita sa class mo? 



I smiled. I end earlier than her so that wouldn’t be necessary. 



[2:19pm, Monday] Karina: it’s okay i’ll meet you there na lang 

 

[2:20pm, Monday] Winter: okay

[2:20pm, Monday] Winter: see u O(∩_∩)O



I was telling Yuyu about my upcoming talk with Winter during lunch. Sumabay sila ni Chaeryeong sa amin but sila Winter hindi. Winter had stuff to do for her Math org while Ning was with Himig. Tuwang-tuwa lang si Yuyu when I told her how Winter picked me up in the morning. Sabi niya, nagulat lang siya makita ang text ni Winter that morning but she was very happy to know that Winter was finally going to talk to me.

 

I still don’t know what happened between them. Hindi pa nagkukwento si Yuyu sa akin. Actually, ayaw niyang i-kwento. Sabi niya, dapat kay Winter manggaling ang lahat at hindi sa kanya. Because the issue is between the both of us. 

 

So I stopped asking. 

 

But I did ask her to wait for me just in case my talk with Winter goes south.

 

I was a little anxious sa last class namin. Every single scenario, the good and bad, just played in my head that I stopped paying attention in class. Lumilipad na yung pag-iisip ko that I didn’t realize our class had ended. 

 

Lia tapped me on my shoulder asking me if I was okay. Giselle was giving me a quizzical look. Sabi ko sa kanila, I was okay but nervous for our talk. 

 

“Don’t be. You’ll be fine,” sabi ni Giselle while hugging me. “Tell us all about it after, okay?” 

 

“I will.”

 

“Good luck, KK.” Lia kissed me on the cheek. “Actually, I think Winter will need all the luck.” She winked. 

 

I had a little over 30 minutes before kami magkita ni Winter. I thought about getting something to eat but my nervousness was making my stomach a little queasy. Baka masuka ko lang yung kakainin ko. 

 

So I started walking towards our meeting place. I don’t know why Winter chose that place. It’s just not a place for two people to talk, I think. I would’ve thought that Winter would want something more private. 

 

There were chairs sa tapat ng graduate faculty and I sat down. I took out my airpods and just went on social media while I waited for Winter. Hindi naman ako makapag-concentrate if I did my readings so at least social media can take my mind off things. 

 

I was just looking at people’s IG stories. Some people reposted some funny TikToks and those meet-cute TikToks when they met their significant other. Ang cute lang ng iba that I couldn’t help but smile. I was so engrossed in it that I didn’t notice Winter was already in front of me. Napansin ko lang siya when she waved her hand in front of my face 

 

When I looked up and saw Winter smiling at me, timing lang na that song from those meet-cute TikToks kept replaying and I don’t know if that was a sign or just me going in over my head. 

 

“Hi,” she said so softly. Wisps of her hair were blowing against the wind. I had to take a moment to remind myself where I was. I took off my airpods and stood up. “Naghintay ka ba ng matagal?”

 

I shook my head. “Not really.” I put my airpods away. Being this close to Winter again reminded me na mas matangkad ako sa kanya. Kasi tumingala siya ng konti as she looked at me. “Uh, are we going somewhere to talk or?” 

 

“Dito na lang tayo. Upo ka muna.” She just ushered me to sit back down. “Baka mahaba pag-usapan natin. Pwede din hindi.” She took a deep breath before sitting down beside me. 

 

“Okay. Sure ka you want to talk here?” 

 

Tumango siya. “Ma

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yujiwinteo
19 streak #1
Chapter 54: I love you both 😭 i miss them a lot more today!
eunmin143 #2
Chapter 54: Author dto nalang po kami nagco-cope, stress reliever at safe haven n namin ang pagbasa ng story nyo:( sana po wag nyo i-discontinue or i-delete po ito katulad ng maraming winrina fics. Simulan palang may disclaimer nmn na portrayer lng sila and fiction naman talaga to. Safe place namin ang platform na to sana di nyo po kagaya yung iba na disrespectful daw ang pag gawa pa ng winrina au eh kaya nga fiction lng to, any characters/events is not connected sa real life. Dto na nga lang karamihan sumasaya, para san pa ang platform nato diba po kundi para maging safe place ng imaginations natin kaya nga fiction eh. Please po wag kayo tumulad sa madaming authors 🙏
colderme
#3
Chapter 54: Sa AU lang talaga ako kinikilig😍
flexxxx #4
Chapter 54: SHEEEET 😍😍😍😍
tjdbswl1331
#5
Chapter 54: KILIG
Db1234 #6
Chapter 54: 🤍
PurpleCABBAGELover
#7
Chapter 54: sus, sa una lang yan chosssT.T
TYTFshipper
242 streak #8
Chapter 54: Kala ko hindi maaddress yung sa closeness/knowing each other WELL nila rina at ryujin 🥹 gets naman kasi yung friendship nung dalwa eh pero gets din yung point ni winter 🥹 mas okay pag usapan kasi talaga 😌 anyways yes to kilig na naman po tayoooo see you next chap tor!!
yukimin
#9
Chapter 54: grabe po opo tatlo tayong kinikilig
jaangwaang
868 streak #10
Chapter 54: naol 🥺🥺🥰