XV - Maybe The Night

Choosing You
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They were both silent during the whole trip from the diner to her old apartment. Her mom didn't notice since she was deep asleep the whole ride. Mina Eomma lives on the floor under Yuri's. Some of her mom's relatives unexpectedly came that night and are sleeping over there. Yuri didn't have a choice but to let Jessica sleep with her in her place.

Entering Yuri's apartment felt like entering the gates of heaven and hell at the same time to Jessica. Yuri's scent mixed with the smell of wood lingered on her reminding the times when Yuri was still living there.

When she ran to her after finding out that Yuri had left the apartment they provided to her after the incident. The times when Yuri laughed at her reaching the second floor dog-tired already and breathing heavily. Yuri then carries her on her back until they reach the roof deck and she immediately lies down on the concrete floor tired as hell while Jessica enjoys the cool breeze that touches her face. The first time she sleeps over there and everything felt awkward for the both of them sharing the bed.

When Yuri asked her to be her girlfriend that made her the happiest girl in the universe.

When they first made love.

They didn't leave the place for two straight days.

All the ordinary days when they just want to lie down there in each other's arms enjoying the silence after a chaotic schedule they had.

The moments with their friends just eating their favorite food that Yuri and Mina Eomma prepared.

The tour to their past continues when she sees all the open boxes on the floor and some piled up at the corner. She immediately recognized that those were Yuri's things she took out from their apartment. And seeing those stabbed her heart because she may not have the chance to take those back... maybe even Yuri.

She walks towards a box and sees Yuri's Star Wars Lego collection that they almost fought about. Yuri once got so busy building the blocks that wasted Jessica's whole day off. Yuri didn't finish her lunch and almost didn't touch her dinner. Jessica was on the verge of breaking and throwing every piece of the model but, Yuri's charm is just irresistible. Jessica smiled with bitterness remembering those.

The box next to it are of Yuri's trophies from TV and film awards ceremonies and other recognitions that not once she missed attending. She even re-scheduled an out-of-the-country investor's meeting when she found out that Yuri will possibly win the Daesang Award, and she did.

On the shelf near the bed, she saw the books that haven't been arranged properly yet. They are just piled up uncategorized. Yuri would always arrange the books not by genre or alphabetically but by the dominating color of the cover.

She walks to the corner and tries to open the box that looked out of place amongst the things around there. Her heart instantly crushed into thousand pieces seeing their photos. The string of polaroid photos that Yuri brought from LA and mixed hundreds of printed photos. Some are framed photos from out-of-the-country tours, awards ceremonies, birthday and anniversary celebrations.

A picture stood out among those that caught her attention. She gets the framed photo of her and Yuri shot in this very place -- after she said her first I love you to Yuri. Tears uncontrollably fell on her face endless as she instantly cried hard. Holding the frame to her chest, she covers her face with a hand and cries her heart out.

 

What happened to us? She thought. I miss you so much, Love."

 

Moments after, Yuri enters the room and sees Jessica standing on the corner and she knows right then and there the reason why the woman's crying. She walks slowly until she's inches away behind Jessica. She doesn't hesitate and gently pats Jessica's shoulder and the woman turns to face her. She looks at Yuri in a silent plea but Yuri didn't look at her, instead, her eyes got drawn to the frame she's holding.

Yuri gets the frame from her hand and takes a look at it. Tears start to cloud her eyes but she's trying to hold them back as she stares at their once joyous faces. She took a deep breath and put it back inside the box. She looked at Jessica and smiled painfully. She gets the handkerchief from her back pocket then starts to wipe Jessica's tears. She didn't say anything. They both didn't utter a word. Yuri leaves her hanky to Jess and walks towards her closet and gets a few pieces of clothes and a pouch and gives them to her.

"Go, get changed and clean. Use the bathroom and I'll change here. I'll make the bed so you can rest after. I'll be downstairs to meet some of mom's relatives. Will you be okay?" Yuri said in a subtle tone.

Jessica nodded.

"Okay."

While Jessica's changing her clothes, Yuri has finished changing and making the bed then left, leaving the lamp to light up the room. When Jessica went out of the bathroom, she felt suffocated smelling the scent of her lover everywhere but not seeing her there. It kills her inside just being alone with things around her that she's not part of anymore.

She couldn't help but cry once more letting the pain out from her senses.

 

It took a while for Yuri to come back. The door was slightly open when she got there and saw a glimpse of Jessica who just came from the bathroom wiping her face with a few sheets of napkin while sniffing with puffy eyes.

She hesitated going inside the room that very moment and so, she sat on the bench outside by the window not minding the cold weather. She checks her phone and sees almost a hundred texts from her gang and Tiffany. She didn't read any of those and just decided to turn it off.

Taeyeon's words entered her thoughts. Her best friend was right. If this ty setup is giving her a hard time, then she must talk to Jessica. But, she's not ready yet and she doesn't know when she will be. 

She could still hear Jessica crying. She knows that the woman's trying to hold it and keep herself down but, with no other sound clinging around, that's all she could hear and it breaks her. The past year, she never saw Jessica cry, well, at least not in front of her. It's always been her weakness and she hates that. The last time she saw her crying was when it was confirmed to have the B&E store in LA and Jessica was crying out of joy. This is different and she knows the very reason behind the tears.

 

She enters the room quietly and lies down distantly next to Jessica. With a hand under her head, Yuri stares blankly at the ceiling. As much as she wanted to sleep on the couch or the floor, she couldn't since her packed things were everywhere.

Jessica weeps silently feeling Yuri's presence on the bed. Their bodies are under one blanket but all she feels is the loneliness the situation gives. The heater of the room and their warm clothes didn't help with how cold everything feels. This is probably the coldest night they spent together in the years of their relationship.

Yuri looks at Jessica.

Her hand reached for the woman's back and started caressing it gently. A moment after, her body moves involuntarily until Jessica's back is leaning on her.

"Don't keep it to yourself," Yuri said. "It's hard to cry alone. I've been there."

Yuri puts her hand on Jessica's shoulder and lightly pats it repeatedly.

Jessica held more tears thinking about the times when Yuri probably cried alone while they're in LA that she never knew.

With just a few more pats on her shoulder, Jessica fell asleep. Maybe because Yuri's presence made her feel comfortable and at home... as always. 

 

It is nearly dawn but Yuri is still wide awake staring at Jessica's face. The woman unconsciously turned to her and wrapped an arm around her but she didn't reciprocate the gesture.

 

​​​​​​What happened to us? She thought. I miss you so much, Love.

 

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palitao
I just marked this story 'Completed'. Thank you all for joining me on this beautiful journey. To more stories! Cheers! 🥂

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MyThoughts
#1
Chapter 29: The story is soooooooooooo beautiful!! I cried!!!! 😭😭 Thank you for the beautiful writing, thank you for the effort, thank you for presenting this story!!!!
__piyu_sahu__
#2
Chapter 28: This story is so good, so emotional... I cried so hard at some times😭😭 I'm missing yulsic so much☹️ i want them together, i want to see them together again 🥺💗
__piyu_sahu__
#3
Chapter 5: This chapter makes me cry so hard😭😭😭
foreveryoung1205
#4
Chapter 28: Oh my.It's been quite a while.
Yulsic will always have a place in my heart.
Kudos!What a great story you have.☺️👏
f8nt_echo
#5
Chapter 29: This has been one of the greatest stories I've read in a while. Thank you so much for sharing this to us. I couldn't stop reading it ever since I first subscribed. It's really engaging. I felt what the characters were feeling. Also, I would very much say yes to everything you wanted to write as extras/special chapters to this story, authornim. I will wait patiently so please only write whenever you feel like it. No pressure. Know that I would give a hundred upvotes to this if I could. Well done.
f8nt_echo
#6
Chapter 25: Yuri's so used to suppress all the negativity and compartmentalize everything. With her emotions being unstable, a simple trigger could be a detonator. She's bound to snap and she did. If Jess really did cheat during the course of their relationship, then that's some really narcissistic she's got going on. At this point, I don't really think she deserves Yuri at all.
f8nt_echo
#7
Chapter 18: This was bittersweet
f8nt_echo
#8
Chapter 11: I'm really glad Yuri has a great support system.
f8nt_echo
#9
Chapter 6: I just think it's really unfair Yuri had to go through all that for something that she wasn't even aware off and her fault in the first place. Going through that mental torture for a year in the hopes of getting even just a single ounce of affection, that's really insane. Well, I guess suffering really is optional and pain is inevitable. Gotta commend Yuri for her fortitude but it's time for some self-love this time, Yul.
f8nt_echo
#10
Chapter 5: 😭😭😭