What I felt was heartache. The woman I loved for so long had become my family. Coming home to you and your daughter each day has become a habit. A habit that began to kill me inside after a year.

Your daughter who looked up to me only made me feel worse about myself. The selfish thoughts I had about keeping you by my side forever grew more intense with each day. I loved her as if she were my own child but the guilt, I had in my heart was too much to bear.

I love you and I always would.

I drank so I could keep myself sane. I drank to try and forget about these awful feelings I had for you. I drank because you thought I was doing this out of the goodness of my heart. I drank because I hated myself.

I hated how you would sneak into my room sometimes, asking to sleep together because you were afraid of the rain. I hated how you would treat me so affectionately when Haesoo wouldn’t be home. I hated how there was this blurred line you cross, making me want to just hold you down and kiss you. I hated how you would hold me from behind and tell me you loved me.

I was a fool. A selfish fool who couldn't let go of a one-sided love.

You asked me what was wrong when you found me drinking late one night. I couldn’t answer you truthfully and told you it was just stress from work. We both knew that wasn’t wh