a/n, like I said, changed jungwoo to xiaojun. Jungwoo was supposed to be a teacher in indo lol and lawyer lee’s ex bf from jeno’s story. 

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It was a mystery why your family treated you this way. You were already dying, why must they make it so hard for you? Each and every day Lee Haechan spent with you he was overthrown by how kind you were.

You cried often about your family and about how little they made you feel.

But he noticed the longing in your eyes as you would speak about your memories with your family. That one memory of when he had given you a hug because he was drunk. He had told you that he knew that he wasn’t a very good father and the memory had etched itself into your soul.

It was the way you were. You saw too much of the good in people even if time took that away from them. Haechan wondered how you continued to trust in the wonders of the world despite being out down so many times.

His first kiss with you was under the moonlight when he had climbed through the window to see you waiting for him with eager eyes and a warm hug. You had engulfed him in your arms and in the darkness, your lips had found his.

It was a soft peck but it was enough for Haechan to know that he was dipping down in dangerous waters because of the swooping sensation that made him feel like he was floating. It was not passionate, not fiery but soft and sweet.

He was incredibly gentle with you, Haechan hoisting you up with his arms and bringing you to the bed.

You have left him breathless.

Mark seemed to know something was up with Haechan. On days he would head back to the apartment, Mark would be waiting for him. Mark thought Haechan was still mourning—but was he? He looked more worried than sad.

Like he was dreading for what was to come and not heartbroken over something that had already happened.

“You need to tell me what’s going on,” Mark said from the doorway with Haechan tugging on a new set of clothes and shoving an extra T-shirt into his backpack. “I’m worried.”

Take it up to Mark to be honest.

“You don’t have to be.”

“You know that’s not happening.”

Haechan did not feel annoyed by the questions. They were bound to happen, Mark being his best friend.

“Do you trust me?” Haechan asked, turning over his shoulder and giving Mark a smile. Mark blinked, his eyes skating over Haechan’s features. The dark shadows, his chapped lips, the signs of someone who was lacking sleep.

“Are you drinking again?” Mark asked carefully, Haechan chuckling lowly before shaking his head. “You don’t even smoke weed anymore.”

“Shouldn’t that be a good thing?”

“Not if you’re into other strong ,” Mark answered.

“I’m in love,” Haechan answered, turning back to tug on pants. There was a sound and he whipped his head around to see that Mark had accidentally slammed against the doorway and was now heading over to Haechan.

“Who? Where? When?”

“Jealous?” Haechan smirked, Mark clicking his tongue.

“Maybe,” Mark replied and Haechan laughed lowly before he hit Mark with a sentence that he knew would throw his best friend off.

“She’s sick,” Haechan added and Mark froze.

“That’s not funny.”

“I know.”

“How bad?”

“Not sure.”

Haechan smiled at the male before him, Mark thinking to himself that he looked so sad. That the smile that was on Haechan’s face was not forced because he looked thankful but he looked sad.

“I’m leaving,” Haechan told Mark, grabbing the bag and heading back to the hospital to you.

The moment he did reach the hospital, he had done the same thing and went to the rooftop. As he swung himself down, he entered your open window just to freeze.

Your sister was there, her eyes bouncing back between him and you. Haechan gasped, realizing that the hospital room had a visitor and his grip on the window seal eased just for him to fall onto the ground and roll under the bed.

“Stop, drop, and roll?” your sister asked, raising an eyebrow at Lee Haechan. “Where’s the fire?”

Your sister had just arrived and you were deep in a conversation with her when Haechan arrived. Much to Haechan’s surprise, your sister did not seem mad.

“Next time, if you’re going to visit my sister… Don’t get caught.”

Haechan peeked from the side of the bed to see that your sister was staring at him.

“Secretary Lee, can you make sure that the guards don’t come in?” she asked and you smiled at Haechan as if to tell him that it was safe.

“This is my sister, Haechan. She’s the president of my family’s corporation,” you told him and stood up.

“President?” Haechan echoed. He knew that your sister was trying to pave the way for your family and had the burden of the company on her back.

“Newly appointed. Call me President Park,” your sister snipped. Haechan bowed his head slowly, the door closing. “And that is my secretary. Chittaphon Leechaiyakul.”

Her secretary bowed to Haechan. President Park was wearing a black Gucci suit with high heels that he would be able to spot from a mile away. She reached over to touch your forehead and you smiled at her.

“You’ve been keeping my sister company?” she asked Haechan and he nodded, his throat dry. “Good. She needs it.”

She looked at you with so much adoration, the female smoothing your cheek.

“You're going to be just fine,” she whispered and even if the room knew it was a lie, no one said anything. You nodded. “You’ll have to make it to my wedding.”

“My sister is getting married,” you told Haechan and he blinked.

“Congratulations.”

“Don’t say that. It’s forced.” President Park ran a hand through her hair before she leaned down to kiss you on the forehead. “I’ll come again on Thursday, okay? Ten, tell the guards that under no circumstances should they ever come into the room unless they are being buzzed in. My parents should not know about this man coming in through the window.”

Haechan flushed pink and you snickered.

“I’m off,” President Park announced. “Goodbye, you. Goodbye, you.”

And she opened the door and left. Haechan looked at the vase to see that there were flowers.

It was easier for him for the days to come since the guards never came in under your sisters’ orders.

Until it changed one day.

He had entered the hospital when the nurse grabbed him, Xiaojun squeezing his arm.

“You can’t go to her room,” he told Haechan.

Haechan had no idea what was going on but he was quickly filled in. Long story short, you were not doing so well. He would learn that the cancer was terminal and you were a lost cause. Your parents put you in the hospital without any treatment because the doctors said it would be futile.

You wanted to die happy and not suffer from constant treatment.

Haechan lost his sight that day. His mind was jumbled at the thought of not being able to see you one day and he had to leave the hospital to breathe. Punch after punch against the brick wall in front of him, his fingers in a tight fist.

The pain from his hand was nowhere near as painful as how his heart felt.

He hated it but it was the reality of things.

You were dying and he was in love with you.

The worst part was that there was simply nothing he could do to save you.

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Lee Haechan knew he had to do something before time would come and he’d regret not ever doing anything. He glanced at the flowers your sister had given to you and reached for it, your voice asking you what he was doing. He turned and passed you a small smile. Your health had deteriorated the past few days and buried deep inside Haechan’s heart, he wondered if you felt it too.

Or was it a secret? A soft whisper that was erupting inside you that you were dying to say?

If you did, you did not show it. Lee Haechan glanced at the well wrapped flowers that had the company logo on it, a mark of your family’s legacy. He took note of it, finally retreating back from the flowers to go towards the bed. He fell into a seat right in front of you, a hand going to take yours before he rubbed it softly.

You noticed his hand, all wrapped up and bloodied and your eyes widened. You grab his hand to inspect before your jaw went slack, your eyes flickering over to his face for a moment then back to his hand. You could make out the soft red from the blood that was pooling from within and you lifted it up to your lips.

“What’s wrong with your hand?” you ask and Haechan shook his head as if to say that he did not want to talk about it. “Did you get into a fight?”

With a wall, Haechan wanted to say.

“I played guitar a bit too roughly,” Haechan said, and even though you knew that was the stupidest excuse ever, you did not want to push. If Haechan wanted to tell you he would. You had to know one thing.

“Is it because of me?”

He did not hesitate to shake his head, tightening his bandaged hand around your wrist.

“No, not you,” he lied. “No, my love. Not you.”

You knew it was about you. It was the way he looked away when he said it, the way he laid his cheek against your hand, and it was the way his eyes seemed to water at the thought. Haechan wanted to protect you from the world, from anyone hurting and he would do so even if he had to lie to protect you from your own thoughts.

“You promise?” you asked and he turned back, nodding before standing up to kiss your forehead then his lips trailed down to your lips. He did not linger and you knew full well that you had crowded his ming and you gulped, Haechan scooting closer. “Donghyuck—”

“I promise. I promise with everything I have that I would never hurt myself because of you.”

That was not true. He’d hurt himself for you and he knew that. Haechan pushed your hair away from your face, desperately thinking of a way to lighten up the mood. He couldn’t be sad.

Not in front of you.

“Tell me about your sister,” Haechan said to you and you your lips. “Why does she not visit as often?”

“She’s been trying to fight for her own freedom,” you answered. You loved your sister; you knew exactly what she was trying to do. Sadly, people were born only with one body and twenty-four hours a day. “My dad is trying to marry her off.”

“Really?” Haechan feigned interested. He did not care about who your sister was going to get married to, but you seemed happy to talk about her and he could tell you looked up to her. Your smile brightened, nodding before your head fell forward. “What?”

“I wish I could see the wedding,” you tell him and your eyes glistened. “White dresses and curtains up high. Food for people who come to give me—” your voice cracked. “Who come to give the bride their blessings.”

“Weddings are just a social construct,” Haechan said playfully, blowing on your face but he could tell that you did want to experience it. All little girls did. “Lie down.”

“Why? Where are you going?” you asked frantically, your arms automatically wrapping around his neck. Haechan knew how weak you were and, on some days, you’d push your limits in trying to stay awake. The moment he’d lie you down, you’d feel drowsy and he’d leave.

“Nowhere, baby.” His voice was smooth and your skin-tinged pink with the pet-name he called you. He said it so naturally, you had forgotten that he had never called you that before, the male fluffing up the pillow and pushing you down softly. “I’ll be right here.”

Haechan knew that saying that would calm you down almost immediately, your hand loosening around his neck before he peppered your face with small kisses down to your throat. He stopped when his lips grazed the skin above your neck line, Haechan moving back and giving you another kiss on the cheek.

He was generous with affection and even if both of you never said anything about the nature of your relationship, you knew that Haechan was one of those who loved you. You closed your eyes, the blaring of the TV in the background you spoke.

“You know, the guy my sister is marrying is really handsome?” you ask, Haechan perking up at your question. “He’s a model and he had made the headlines a couple of times. Jung Jaehyun.”

“Jay the Model?” Haechan asked incredulously and you shifted, turning to your side to see his reaction. His eyes were wide with recognition and you noticed that he looked up, like he was absorbing the information when he nodded. “I know him.”

“You do?” you asked, Haechan jerking up and placing a hand on your mouth before both of you turned to stare at the door. Did they hear you? Your sister had given them a warning and told them to give you privacy. She said you were still a woman. They listened to her but your sister’s words would not hold much weight if they find out that Haechan has been sneaking in through the rooftop and through your window.

“Yeah.”

“How is he like?”

“A f—” Haechan made himself stop. He wanted to say “ boy” but he didn’t want to corrupt your innocent mind. He knew full well you had no idea how the outside world worked. “He’s… a nice guy. He’s warm. He’s a model… Well, used to be. I think he’s trying to be an actor now.”

“My sister is going to be married to a model?” You tried not to squeal, your chest bubbling with happiness. “Oh, Donghyuck. She’s going to be so happy.”

Haechan knew that was not true. Jay the Model had a notorious reputation for ing around. He did not blame him. Jay was blessed in ways no other people were.

“Well… Yes. I mean, he is a gentleman,” Haechan said, gulping. Until he s her and leaves the relationship. “I didn’t know he was a senator’s son until I came to Korea. His father used to come to our church.”

“He was sent abroad to study English and he got scouted. I remember I was just starting to go back and forth into the hospitals at that time. I don’t know him personally, never met him.”

For good cause, Haechan thought. He’d never want you to meet Jay the Model, dying or not. Selfish of him but he wanted you to himself—in this small room where it was just you and him.

“I partied with him a few times,” Haechan told you and you leaned forward, asking him how it was. Musicians partied a lot, Haechan told you. “He got drunk and left early.”

That was a lie, too. He saw Jay with two different girls that night.

“I bet he sleeps a lot. Models have a lot of work to do, don’t they? They stand for hours and hours in front of the camera,” you rambled on, Haechan nodding in cue. Yes, he sleeps a lot. He sleeps around.

You beamed at Haechan and he patted your cheek softly. You yawned and he knew that it wouldn’t be long until he’d have to leave. Just like that, another day would have passed. You closed your eyes and after two minutes, Haechan stood up and kissed you on the cheek.

Oh, how he loved you so.

He took one last look at the flowers by the table before making his way out of the room, hoisting himself up and cracking his knuckles before heading back down to the parking lot. He had done this so many times, he probably knew the hospital like the back of his hand.

Upon entering the car, he started it and made his way straight for your family’s company. A tower situated right in the middle of Seoul, high rise glass buildings with 36 floors. He sighed, easing his foot off the accelerator before parking it right in front of the entrance.

The valet began to rush towards him, Haechan casually giving them the key and masking his surprise. People entered and exited the company on a daily basis. His car wasn’t that bad looking but he didn’t expect to be served this way.

He walked to the counter, trying his luck.

“Uh… I need to see President Park,” he said, remembering that Chairman Park was your father. Mrs. Park would be your mother but she was not part of the business and President Park would be your sister. She had snagged the position through her hard work and her determination and Haechan knew there was a very little percentage that he’d even be able to see your sister.

“Do you have an appointment, sir?” the register asked and he blinked. She eyed his leather jacket and Haechan felt himself being once-overed by a few people. Of course, he wasn’t dressed for the scenery. He shook his head and she gave him a sympathetic glance. “I’m sorry, sir. I—”

“It’s fine.” Haechan raised a hand, his tongue poking out the side of his mouth before he turned and scanned the place. He was feeling lucky today and he wondered if he should ride with the feeling.

How was he supposed to get to your sister?

He reached up to pinch the bridge of his nose when he massaged it. Maybe he should wait. Your sister would still be working and maybe he could catch her when she came down—

He paused when his eyes fell on a man who just exited a car, the male recognizing him straight away. That was your sister’s secretary, the male heading towards the security barriers when Haechan sprinted towards him. He caught himself by surprise. He grabbed the man.

“Uh—”

“What the ?” your sister’s secretary asked, swatting him away and Haechan breathed. “Wait, aren’t you the dude who keeps entering and breaking President Park’s sister’s hospital room?”

“Ahuh, yes. I need to see her,” Haechan said and blinked. “What’s your name again? It was complicated when I first heard it so…”

“Chittaphon.”

“Still complicated,” Haechan muttered, straightening himself.

“Just call me Secretary Lee. Or Ten. I’m not one for formal talk,” Ten said and Haechan nodded before pointing. “You can’t just go see President Park without an appointment.”

“It’s about her sister. She’s dying.”

“I know that,” Ten sighed. “Is that why you are here? Because you think President Park does not know