"welcome a new member of our team - son seungwan." joohyun gestures at the shorter girl. "this is a temporary change in our system but we're going to welcome it nevertheless, right?"

"yes, mom." kibum rolls his eyes.

"do you want to say a word?" joohyun asks, her voice softening as she turns to look at seungwan.

"um," seungwan blinks as suddenly all eyes in the room are on her. "even though this wasn't my first choice, i'm still going to work hard. you don't have to worry about me slacking at all! please, take good care of me." she bows at them all, and seulgi claps.

"very good speech," she says with a grin.

"alright, take a seat." joohyun points at the chair in between jennie and seulgi, staying at the front as seungwan does as she's told.

joohyun likes that there's a system to everything. everyone has a job they do, everyone has their own seat. everyone has their role, when the role is not clear that's when things get tricky. joohyun looks at seungwan, who's smiling brightly at the members welcoming her into their little group.

how long has it been since she had to apologize for something? she doesn't remember a moment when she was actually at fault when she did something wrong. at least not since she was out of middle school.

I'm sorry but I don't feel that way, she remembers saying a lot. 

but that wasn't really her fault. it doesn't really count. she didn't do anything wrong then, not really. 

would 'i'm sorry' be enough? it seems insincere like she doesn't really care about the situation. 

i'm sorry for what i did. 

it would look like she doesn't really know what she did wrong. 

i'm sorry for going too far. 

but then it would look like it was okay if she went in only a little and she did way more than that. she basically tried to kiss her if seungwan wouldn't have stopped her, she probably would have. it wasn't the nicest thing to accuse seungwan of wanting to do improper things. but was she really being truthful when she said she wanted to help her for the good of her heart?

joohyun never said she needed help. she never asked for it, she's gotten used to the confessions and harassment and yet seungwan stepped up because... because? they didn't even know each other. they didn't even talk that much so why.. 

like the way at the faculty office, out of the goodness of her heart, she stepped back just because some person might get replaced by her. that place is rightfully hers, but seungwan didn't see it that way. she now has to wait for a whole year if she wants to be back in the club just because of her own little stubborn self that refused to take an out. she could've just skipped all the trouble of this certainty but no. it's just not her.

why did joohyun feel so guilty for stepping out of line? normally she would not feel a thing cause seungwan clearly was flustered, she clearly was imagining ually charged things about the two of them. joohyun didn't even do that much.. but maybe seungwan's tolerance for these things is low.

joohyun would not blink an eye at lewd comments some of the guys threw at her, she wouldn't even care that much if they grabbed their crotch with a wink aimed at her. but that's because she got used to it. maybe seungwan didn't have anything like that happen to her. maybe joohyun was the first person to get this close to her. after all, she did say she didn't date anyone. ever. 

should she buy something as an apology, would that work? the only thing joohyun could think that seungwan would want is the girlfriend experience and that's because the girl told her she wanted it. what else can she give her than a perfect girlfriend?

"joohyun?" jennie calls her attention.

she snaps out of her thought to realize she's been thinking while standing in front, completely ignoring them.

"right, the, um." she shakes her head, feeling seungwan's eyes on her. "the rally for president campaign. we'll do that later today."

"is your speech going to be the same as this one? because if so, i have some notes." kibum stares.

"no, my speech is fine." joohyun says. "seungwan will stand together with me."

"what?" jennie frowns. "why would she stand with you? no offense," she turns to seugnwan then back at seungwan. "she just joined."

"that's why. we're welcoming of everyone and a new face might change the way people view us. seungwan is perfect in that regard. besides, everyone loves her."

"w-what will i need to do?" seungwan asks, cheeks red for some reason.

"just stand by me, nothing else." joohyun shrugs.

"we'll be there, too. don't worry." seulgi grins at her.

"hard to imagine how one could screw things up." kibum says, resting head on his hand.

when they said it was a campaign rally seungwan didn't realize it was going to the whole school watching them and listening to joohyun talk. seungwan stands on the stage in a crowded auditorium together with two other contestants for the school council president's position. seungwan has no idea how they are even eligible if they aren't in the council at all but they are there too. her eyes dart around, looking for joohyun when-

"come over here." joohyun sighs and pulls her closer with a soft grip around seungwan's wrist.

seungwan can't seem to move her body right, doesn't know where to look or how to even breathe properly. she tries to swallow but it kind of gets stuck in with how dry it is. 

she meets joohyun's calming eyes with her own panicked ones. she allows herself to be lead to the side of the stage, where it's a little more private.

"you're not even the one speaking." joohyun cracks a small smile, gripping her wrist tighter now. "why are you nervous?"

"it's just-" she glances behind her. "people."

"don't you sing on stage? in front of people?"

"that's different." seungwan insists with heat in her tone.

"you just have to stand there, that's all." joohyun's hand slips lower. "that's even easier than singing."

"maybe it's difficult because i'm not singing. i feel unprepared. like i should know lyrics and melody but i- my head is blank."

"you want to sing?" joohyun's eyes squint a little at her.

"right now?" seungwan gapes at her. "no way- i-"

"not right now, you poop-puppy." she rolls her eyes, acting as if she didn't say anything strange. "i mean, do you miss singing? on stage in particular?"

"yes." seungwan nods, still thinking about the weirdly specific nickname she just acquired.

"you should make it your project." joohyun says. "prepare an open mic night or something. that way you'll have something to do for the council."

"i can do that?" seungwan looks at joohyun in wonder.

"of course. write up a proposal and we'll approve it."

"okay." seungwan nods, already thinking up a plan on how to organize everything.

she's so deep in thought she doesn't notice that she's holding hands with joohyun in front of the whole college. joohyun chuckles under her breath while she looks at her, it's obvious that she doesn't realize what's happening anymore and is not afraid anymore. it seems like the plan of distracting her worked like a charm.

"welcome first candidate - bae joohyun!" the announcer says, gesturing at them both huddled to the side.

joohyun blinks and drops seungwan's hands. it's unprofessional to be like this at such an important time in her career.

she raises her chin and walks over to the microphone. seungwan is right behind her as planned and joohyun likes everything to go according to plan, that's all.

joohyun never had a problem with physical affection. holding hands is no problem. she's fine with kissing. she's okay with , too, it just has to be with a decent person. she's done that plenty but when it comes to relationships, that's where she hits the wall.

what is she supposed to do here? what's her role? what does seungwan expect from her?

like anything that she does not understand she does research: she goes to the one person that never judged her.

"so." she sits down next to her one morning when no one is around, "relationships," she says.

"wow, you're really going through with this, huh."

"with what?"

"everyone is talking about it. personally, i thought it was bull but you were holding hands with her and and now you've come to me. what should i think now?"

"i have no idea what you're talking about."

"so you didn't come here to talk about dating with me?" jennie raises her eyebrows and crosses her arms, knowing that she got her.

"i just need some information so i know what to do."

"i think you know what to do." jennie smirks. "just hold her hand and cherish her."

"it's not that simple. i-i don't know how." joohyun puts her hand on her forehead with a sigh. "seun