< Confession Letter >

She stood across the road as she watched her from afar, happily snuggled with her lover, celebrating her birthday .

Yuna pulled up the mask on her face and huffed whenever someone walked past her as she stared at them. 

Skies above her darkened as time passed but Yuna couldn't find her will to move away from the spot she was standing so she could watch her.

Happily living her own life. 

It's not like she cheated on her nor Yuna cheated on Eunbi. She loved her so much but she didn't notice it as she was too busy chasing her dreams. She let the time pass behind her and unfortunately Eunbi too.

It was until Eunbi asked for a breakup that she realized that she and Eunbi weren't in sync anymore.
 

Oh if only Yuna had known that she should've stopped her back then. 

Oh she would. 

It rained soon after and Choi Yuna was drenched under the rain.
 

Jung Eunbi.

"A long way to go, a long way to go

Sometimes I've been suffocating like I wasn't

I'm comforted by the wind and the old days" 

 

They were in high school when she first met her, Eunbi left a big impression on her as she was always bright and cheerful. Yuna had thought Eunbi was adorable, she still is.

 

You see, Yuna was shy and had low self-esteem when she was a child so when she met the girl named Jung Eunbi it was like a whole new world. 

Despite being bright and cheerful, Eunbi was mature at such a young age. It was a matter of time for Yuna to take a hint that she had fallen hard for the girl. 

Yuna's family was a traditional oriented family, so her 'coming out of the closet' news to her family was a big deal to her that she chose to run away from home. 

The quarrel got out of hand and Yuna ran out of the house. 

She ran away to Eunbi. 

Under the rain, Yuna told her she liked her and to her surprise Eunbi liked her back but she wanted Yuna to go back home and sort it out with her parents. 

Yuna did return home. 

At the end of high-school graduation, Yuna's parents gave her some surprising news. That they are willing to support and accept wholeheartedly the relationship. 

The couple couldn't be happier and Yuna promised that she would always make her happy, that she will always be by her side. They shared their first kiss later at the bridge that evening by the sea near Eunbi's house. 

"Don't you worry Worry Worry

When you walk up this road

Put your mind down so that you can see this night well

You're the only one only

Even if everything about you is gone

Don't let go of this moment

This night will drive me home again" 

When Yuna discovered her talent in singing, she was overwhelmed with wonder. She had always sung when she was a little child but receiving such an opportunity to go further was too much of an ecstatic for a person to dream of. 

Some months later, Yuna signed a contract as a singer. She got busier with training. Eunbi didn't continue studying in college and work so she could support living for both of them. 

Eunbi was so supportive and understanding. She hardly complained whenever Yuna got home late or when she was stressed. 

It was springtime when Yuna had to be fully casted as a trainee and she brought home the news to Eunbi. 

Jung Eunbi had smiled upon the news and of course, Yuna left. 

She left without considering her girlfriend might feel Yuna was floating into her own world while Eunbi's crumbled slowly. 

"Smoke doesn't make me feel good

I miss the night I was running and drinking with you more

Still with you

But I can't find my way

I'm forgetting my way back" 

Yuna had the best of her time, she was at the peak of her youth, the rush of adrenaline through her veins and nothing ever felt greater than what she had been feeling except, she forgot the girl who loves her wholeheartedly. 

Yuna didn't know Eunbi stayed up most nights to work so she could pay the bills, so Yuna would live comfortably there. 

Eunbi, who had let go of her youth just to be with Choi Yuna. She did it to prove it to her parents that she and Yuna could live together on their own. 

There's a night where Jung Eunbi was patiently waiting outside of Yuna's dorm just to see her, to check on her but Yuna dismissed her coldly. 

Eunbi told her she was changing into someone that she isn't, in which Yuna brushed it off. 

Still Eunbi stayed beside her as she understood Yuna was probably stressed with her training.

What Yuna didn't know was Eunbi had been fighting for their collapsing relationship. She wouldn't care much about it anyway. 

Then it happened. 

Eunbi asked to meet her on a rainy evening. Yuna was thrilled to see her again. It has been months since she talked to her, so when she knew Eunbi wanted to see her, she was sort of overwhelmed. 

Yuna should've read her better, she should've known those sorry eyes when she looked at her. 

She should have predicted it was coming to this point with the way she was hanging around her. 

Who knew Choi could be crushed with those words? Yuna underestimated the karma too early and it hits her real hard. 

" let's break up " 

"Don't you worry Worry Worry

When you walk up this road

Put your mind down so that you can see this night well

You're the only one only

Even if everything about you is gone

Don't let go of this moment

This moment will not over" 

Although Eunbi had left her that night, Yuna found her way back to the dorm. 

She was confused and sad. No, she was devastated. 

She was so devastated that Yuna had skipped her training, isolating herself in her dorm. 

She had never realised that it's because of Eunbi her life was filled with colors and voices. She had never felt like someone was taken away from her until Eunbi had left. 

She took the picture of her and Eunbi that she kept inside the drawer and wondered where she had gone wrong. 

Ah, why would she even wonder.

Yuna grew hatred on rainy days, why? 

How can she not? Yuna remembered vividly how it happened. It was raining when she met her and Yuna wanted to point a finger on that rainy day even though she knew it was silly to do so. 

Everything went down into the drain, she had stopped showing up on her practice. She had stopped talking like she usually does. 

Yuna didn't know who told Eunbi of her pathetic episodes for Eunbi to appear in front of her for the first time after the breakup. 

It was what Eunbi had said that knocked Yuna out of her trances, her grievance and realised what had she had run to so far ,singing. 

" You had come this far, Yuna, I've been there until this point, make me proud " she told her as she cried. 

She did anyway, Yuna kept going until she had debuted as a soloist under a different name. 

"Under the moonlight more colorful than a street lamp

A day that flew through the wind

Can I pass myself yesterday?

When the day comes, it doesn't look faint

It take so long seems tired

Your voice as I go without a fixed place" 

Sometimes Yuna wished she had stopped her from walking away that day, maybe things will turn around and resets.

But she didn't. 

You see, when you break a mirror and glued it together again, it will never look the same. You'll see the cracks and mismatch reflection , in short, they will never be the same mirror initially. 

In this case, Eunbi is the mirror and Yuna was trying to glue it all together. 

Yuna had showered in succes, numerous awards and one of the top rising soloists of South Korea at the time when she learned Eunbi's whereabouts. 

She followed her, just to get her heart broken the second time. Only this time it was because Eunbi had moved on. 

Refusing to let disappointment consume her, Yuna had frequently followed her. Wishing some sort of miracle to happen. 

It was until she followed her on May 30 to a cafe, she was celebrating her birthday. 

Eunbi looked so beautiful, she was laughing and was having a great time. 

Then something clicked on the back of her head.. Jung Eunbi. 

She looked so happy.. no, she looked happier than she ever was. 

Yuna touched her chest where it hurts so much, it hurt to finally realize that she was never the one to make her happy. 

Not the one that was holding her right now with her proud look on her face whenever she looked at Eunbi. 

Surprisingly,after the rain, sun set beautifully as Yuna cried in the streets that evening. She cried as she finally letting go of her resentment with Jung Eunbi

As she walked away, she thought of a song for her Eunbi, all the things that flew past them, of how she should apologise and be thankful to , and how she was feeling at the moment. 

" confession letter.." she paused as she smiled genuinely. It felt as if it was the first time she ever bore a smile genuinely from her heart. 

"So don't worry Worry Worry

When there's no end in sight

Put it down for a minute so you can hear this night well

You're the only one only

Not easy to let go

Even if I'm stuck in thought

This night will drive me home again

I'm fine I'm good I'm fine I'm good enough

I'll let you go today and I won't forget tomorrow" 

-End-