Jimin goes home every eight in the evening, five times every week with consistency for the routine that she made for herself for a few years already. She doesn’t want to go away from it, nor even miss a day when she doesn’t go out to her rooftop around nine in the evening after preparing for her bed. When it’s the weekends, she still goes to the rooftop at nine, looking at the moon so intently, a somber feeling always fills her when she sees the cold planet in the sky.

It’s five minutes now before nine, and Jimin is already on her way to the rooftop clad with her penguin pajamas and a small yawn escaping past her lips. She takes a seat on her usual spot, tightening the blanket around her shoulders when she feels a wind chill on her spine.

I should’ve checked the weather before I came up. She thinks, fixing the blanket on her shoulders once again. But she just lets it away, looking up on the moon.

She has done this so many times, but every time she’s in the same place when she promised this with her, her heart clenches so much that she wants to croak out a cry.

“Why are you here? It’s so cold.” Jimin says, “I was looking at you everywhere downstairs. I thought you went home already.” She puts a blanket around the girl and takes a seat beside her.

“I’m sorry, I should've told you first before I went then.”

“It’s okay.” Jimin sighs, and leans her head on the other girl's shoulder, “I missed you though.”

The girl laughs, “I was gone for a few minutes.”

“Your point?” Jimin pouts, “What are you doing here anyway?”

The girl hums, and looks up, “I was just looking and talking to the moon and then you came.”

“Why would you talk to the moon?”

“It gives me tranquility,” The girl answers and Jimin anticipates for more, “I talk to the moon about my worries and happiness, and it gives me so much calmness like this.”

“That’s nice.” Jimin replies, “Do you talk about me to the moon then?”

“Always.” And then the girl pauses, “When I’m not here and you don’t have someone you can talk to about your worries, just talk to the moon okay? Hopefully I can hear you and talk back.”

Jimin slightly finds it weird that the girl is saying that but she puts it away, “I promise.”

“Hey, you.” Jimin starts, looking once again at the moon. “I am not the kind of person to do this at all, but here I am doing this once again and have been doing it for the past four years.”

She laughs, her vision blurring from the tears she’s trying to hold back in, “When you said that I should talk to the moon if you’re not here, I thought you were only joking. I didn’t know I would actually end up doing this to lessen the burdens I’m carrying.”

She wipes the tears that are now freely falling down from her face, “I found it weird that you said that but you’re not here now aren't you? Every day I ask myself what if I still rushed to the airport to stop you? What if I came there and I saw you? Would you have agreed?” She laughs again, “Will you say I’m pathetic right now? The ghost of you still lingers around my apartment, on every corner of the walls there will always be something that reminds me of you, and I wanna be tired of it but I don’t, instead I miss you more.”

There’s no use for this anymore. She thinks, standing up from her seat to go back in. But then I just know I’ll be back here again tomorrow.

-

Jimin comes home to an empty house. She was back from the convenience store to buy drinks for their hangout when she came back to an empty house, the person she was supposed to hangout with, gone. Instead, she finds a letter sitting on the dining table, and a red rose on top of it. She drops the bag of drinks, and shuffles towards the table. With her heart ringing loudly in her ears, she opens the letter.

Dear Jimin,

I know this is such an way to leave you without warning, nor to even spare the chance of saying goodbye but I don’t think I can leave if I see your eyes looking at me so sorrowful, or if you will beg me to stay so the least that I can do to explain things was to leave you a letter before I go. By the time you come home, I’ll be at the airport already and I don’t want you to come to the airport and try to stop me. You have to stay here and reach your dreams. I will be only a nuisance to you if I continue staying here when your parents do not approve of our relationship already. I’m leaving because I want to achieve my goals too. I was offered a scholarship in one of the top universities in the US and  I couldn’t say no, Jimin. As long as I want to stay and be here with you, I only have myself with me, I don’t have parents to rely on and I can only help myself. I can only apologize for doing this to you, for exchanging you to achieve my dreams. Anyways, I don’t want to make this longer so I’m saying my goodbyes, if fate lets us meet i