Chapter 8

Fighter Jets Reupload

Seulgi woke up and felt relieved when this time she saw Irene next to her, holding her hand in her while sleep in the chair next to the bed. That happiness was short lived when the same pain she felt yesterday in all of her body, mostly in her ribs and leg came back. She cried again, and god knew she hated crying. Her whole mouth was dry once again, along with her lips. She pressed the button in her bed to call a nurse or a doctor, to get more painkillers. She felt a soft hand on her face, drying away her tears, it was Irene’s.

‘’My… lips,’’ Seulgi managed to mutter putting one of her fingers to her lips, to show Irene how dry they were, too tired to mutter a full sentence to ask for chapstick. Irene chuckled, and took one out of her pockets applying it on Seulgi’s lips, before readjusting the bed and giving her water. She wiped the remaining wetness with one of her sleeves, caressing Seulgi’s face giving her a loving smile.

‘’Seungwan said I can get out in two weeks.’’ Seulgi said in a whisper, holding Irene’s hand. Seungwan explained her yesterday what happened, why everything was hurting. Since, she was stuck on trying to remember what had happened for her to open the parachute two seconds late, but it was all black. She stared at the ceiling, Irene’s hand in hers, thinking about nothing really. She was too tired to think about work, her responsibilities, she just wanted to get up and get out.

‘’Where’s my mom?”

‘’She’s outside, want me to get her, sweetheart?”

Seulgi nodded for a yes, she didn’t want Irene to lay beside her all day, she had her sister to take care of also, she didn’t want to be a burden for her girlfriend.

‘’Go rest, Yeri… is here. Y-you should c-come after work. Please Irene,’’ She said tightening her hold on Irene’s hand.

‘’Seulgi, I want to stay by your side.’’ Irene said kissing her delicately on the cheek. But Seulgi shook her head.

‘’Irene, please. I love you but you can’t stay here too long.’’ Seulgi said with a pleading voice. Irene nodded weakly before kissing her and going to look for her mother.

 

For the next two weeks, Seulgi stayed in the hospital, with her mother by her sides at all times and Irene visiting her after work or whenever she could. Joy with Yeri also came by, along with Taemin and Sehun when they could to cheer her up. She couldn’t help but notice the different dynamic between Irene and her mother and couldn’t decide whether she liked it or not but decided not to comment on it. She was now able to sit up without much effort but pain still present in the ribcage. Her leg didn’t worry her as much as she knew it would heal on its own fully. She was beyond grateful not to have any cerebral damages, and only bruises and a few broken bones. Still, she had quite the shock when she had seen her whole face covered with scratches, for the first time in the mirror. Irene never once stopped reassuring her and pampering her with love, something she much appreciated and Seungwan made sure to monitor everything perfectly so Seulgi could get the greatest of care.

Today, she was finally going home, to her apartment with Irene. She had come to an understanding with her parents that it would benefit her more staying in Daegu and that she preferred being there anyway, so they let her. Irene was pushing her wheelchair towards the elevator of their building and Seulgi couldn’t help but feel nervous. For the next few months she would be stuck at home, alone lying on the couch. Sure, Yeri was going to be there as she told the girl that her accident changes nothing, but she was going to be left by herself doing nothing. It scared her. It scared her because she didn’t know if she was able to take it, and she didn’t want to end up relieving her frustrations on Irene by getting irrationally angry at her. They entered the apartment, Irene putting the wheelchair close to the couch so Seulgi could sit there, while she would take and put her things in the bedroom. Seulgi looked around the place, nothing really had changed. It was still the same as two weeks ago. She smiled inhaling deeply, having missed the smell of home, of her and Irene’s home.

‘’What would you like to do first?’’ Irene asked with a wide grin on her face, sitting carefully next to Seulgi. Seulgi stopped breathing for a fraction of a second, blinded by her smile, her genuine smile she felt she hadn’t seen in an eternity. She was so in love with Irene, and so grateful that she was there for her during these hard times.

‘’I want to kiss you, properly. Then take a shower, and maybe eat something?’’ Seulgi asked, with an even wider grin than Irene’s. She leaned to kiss her girlfriend, who joined her halfway, locking their lips together, hand on each other’s neck as they explored each other’s mouth. When they broke the kiss, Seulgi buried her head on Irene’s chest, resting there for a little while, with Irene caressing her hair.

‘’Do you mind helping me with the shower?’’ Seulgi asked in a low voice.

‘’You don’t even have to ask Seulgi,’’ Irene replied and felt Seulgi’s hold on her becoming tighter. She felt some warm tears on her neck, and she knew Seulgi was crying. Seulgi was doing it a lot lately and it worried Irene.

‘’I love you, so, so much. Could you just hug me for a while? Please.’’ Seulgi said in a pleading voice. Irene repositioned them both so they could be lying down on the couch, with Seulgi close to her, in a way that Irene was sure she couldn’t hurt her. Seulgi kept on crying for a while, her face in the crook of Irene’s neck, while the latte caressed her back and hummed her favorite song to calm Seulgi down, while she was clinging onto Irene like a koala. Never Irene had witnessed such a clingy and vulnerable Seulgi, but she didn’t mind it, because she would let Seulgi clinge onto her until her last breath if it meant the latter was happy.

 

 

 

‘’That’s a real nice and neat apartment, you’ve got there Seul.’’ Seungwan said as she put down her medical furniture next to the coffee table. She greeted Yeri who flashed her a smile before going back to her books. She was studying on the sofa chair in the living room to keep company to Seulgi.

‘’You’ve been there already.’’ Seulgi said as she rolled her eyes, sitting up on the sofa.

‘’Yeah, but that was embarrassing. Irene probably hates me already with all the embarrassing things that have happened between us.’’ Seungwan said, sitting next to Seulgi.

‘’Really, tell me about the embarrassing moments!’’ Yeri exclaimed, suddenly interested in the conversation.

‘’Oh wel-‘’

‘’Yeri trust me, you really don’t want to know what your sister has been through.’’ Seulgi said, cutting Seungwan off, insisting on the fact that Irene is Yeri’s sister. Yeri looked at the two women with narrowed eyes before taking her headphones and going back to her book. A few minutes later she decided to go to her temporary room at Irene’s house to leave the two friends together.

‘’How’s your ribs? Leg?’’ Seungwan asked.

‘’My rib is pretty fine, it doesn’t hurt as much, and my leg well it’s annoying not being able to walk like a normal person.’’ Seulgi said as she sighed deeply.

‘’You shouldn’t take deep breaths like that or breathe too fast. It can be bad, you know?’’ Seungwan asked Seulgi as she got up and leaned over to examine her friend’s rib. She frowned as she applied some pressure on where the fracture was supposed to be.

‘’You haven’t done any exercises, right?’’

‘’No. I’m just sitting on the couch most of the days, begging my dad to at least let me comeback to work for administration stuff!’’ Seulgi whined, dramatically.

‘’Good. One more month of you not doing any sports, or physical activity and you should be good!’’ Seungwan said with a smile patting sitting back down next to her friend, grabbing the TV remote to put on something.

‘’That’s easy,’’ Seulgi replied with a bright smile.

‘’Yeah, that means no . In any form. You’re still sure it’s easy?’’ Seungwan snapped back with a smirk.

‘’What?! Why?!’’ Seulgi exclaimed, eyes wide her jaw hanging.

‘’Because I said no heavy breaths or anything, it moves your rib, it can be bad. Now come on, let’s watch a movie.’’ Seungwan said as she made Seulgi snuggle up to her, carefully so as not to hurt her rib. They stayed on the couch for a few hours, watching some movies and discussing random topics, from work to their high school memories. Seulgi thought it was nice, to be close like that with her best friend, without any lovesick feelings at the back of her mind for her friend. They asked Yeri if she wanted to take a break and join them but Yeri refused, stating she better study to pass the exam. She talked a bit with Seungwan about the struggles of med school and what was awaiting her, what the job was like before going back to her room. Seungwan and Seulgi went back to watching their movies. Seulgi enjoyed the company. She was going crazy from staying at home doing nothing. Her dad being the head of the Air Force put her on an indefinite leave – meaning until he judges his sweet little daughter was by his standards good enough to go back to work -  and Seulgi enjoyed the gesture, really, but she wished she could go back to at least they care of the administrative stuff so she wouldn’t be bored out of her mind at home. It was killing her that she would see Irene coming home every day, exhausted, then taking care of her with the best of smiles, not complaining a bit. And it killed Seulgi that she couldn’t do anything to help Irene either. Seulgi apologized to Irene for being so closed off about the subject of her having a daughter, and for losing her cool that day when she talked with Seungwan, she just wasn’t ready to tell Irene everything, and she sure didn’t want someone else to tell her.

 

Irene came home, threw her keys on the shoe shelf, took out her shoes and finally undid her hair, ruffling it a bit to relax her scalp. She undid her uniform jacket before walking into the living room to greet her girlfriend but was surprised to see her clinging onto Seungwan both girls smiling as they watched their movies. She frowned, before making her expression into a smile greeting the two of them. She couldn’t help it but seeing Seulgi so close with someone who she used to love, even if nothing had even happened between them. She clenched her fist a little, taking a breath in, before leaning into kiss Seulgi who was looking at her with such a loving smile, arms put up towards Irene inviting her in a hug. Her jealousy getting the best of her, she decided to give Seungwan a full show, inserting her tongue inside Seulgi’s mouth, holding Seulgi by the neck, making the kiss last longer than necessary. It was petty and childish of her, but she couldn’t help it, she needed to display that affection, to show everyone that Seulgi was hers and only hers. She grinned when she saw cheeks got red, as she leaned back into the couch covering her face.

‘’Are you staying for dinner Seungwan?’’ Irene asked, taking off her military jacket, discarding it on the sofa, revealing her very tight black under shirt. Seulgi thought she would combust right here, right now, seeing how this t-shirt accentuates the curves of Irene’s s, how it showed that Irene had abs underneath all that.

‘’I’ve got a date at 10, so no thanks. I should go and get ready.’’ Seungwan replied with a smile, clearly not fazed with Irene’s antics.

‘’Who’s got a date at 10pm?’’ Seulgi asked, raising her brows at Seungwan. Irene sat behind Seulgi, hugging her and pressing her chest against Seulgi’s back.

‘’Taemin’s got a date too, is he going out with you?’’ Irene asked playfully, kissing Seulgi on her ear, before resting her chin on Seulgi’s shoulder.

‘’Yeah, he is nice, and we talked a bit. I thought that I should give it a go.’’ Seungwan replied, looking at her nails.

‘’But still, what kind of date is it to be that late?’’ Seulgi asked, furrowing her brows, grabbing Irene’s hand that was resting on her shoulder, intertwining their fingers together.

‘’The good kind.’’ Seungwan replied, getting up from the couch, patting Seulgi lightly on the head, seeing she still had her frown present.

‘’That means she’s getting laid, honey,’’ Irene replied chuckling, and Seungwan broke into a fit of giggles.

‘’With MY officer?!’’ Seulgi asked in a loud voice.

‘’Oh, come on, look at what you’re doing to your other officer. Anyway, I’ll go, bye girls! And remember what I told you, Seul. Don’t worry, you’ve got only a month left with your broken bones, then you can go back to work!’’ Seungwan said, taking her bag of medical stuff, before leaving the apartment. The two girls waved her goodbye and Irene stood up to accompany her to the door. She went to check up on Yeri, who was still buried in her books, giving her a plate of food and a glass of water. Yeri had her thick black round glasses on her nose, hair in a ponytail, with headphones in her ear. Irene went inside the room and kissed her sister on her temple rubbing her back, Yeri smiling at her. Irene stayed there a bit, reading the lamp desk lit books, about medical stuff and terms she didn’t understand at all. She kissed her on her head once again before leaving her alone to study. She went to their bedroom and took out Seulgi’s pajamas, a grey shirt with tight gray biker shorts, before taking out hers, the same but white. She took them and made her way to the bathroom, she saw Seulgi sitting on the couch, typing something on her phone and laughing. She settled all their things in the bathroom before going back to the couch where Seulgi was.

‘’Ready to shower?’’

‘’Mhm.’’ Seulgi replied, still not looking up from her phone.

‘’Who are you texting like that?’’ Irene asked, crossing her arms arching a brow.

‘’My mom!’’ Seulgi exclaimed back, looking at Irene with her eyes disappearing into crescent, a smile so pure that softened Irene’s expression immediately. Seulgi put her phone down on the table, turning to Irene with the same smile.

‘’Let’s go?’’

‘’Yeah, where are your crutches by the way?’’ Irene asked getting up.

‘’Uh, behind the couch.’’ Seulgi replied as Irene helped her get up putting Seulgi’s arm around her shoulder.

‘’We’ll get them later, come on.’’ Irene said as they made their way towards the bathroom.

She helped Seulgi take off her clothes first and helped her settle in shower. Then, she took off hers, picking up Seulgi’s from the floor and putting them in the pile of ‘’to wash’’ clothes. Seulgi was waiting patiently, sitting on the stool Irene had put there so Seulgi could sit while showering. She watched attentively Irene taking of all of her clothes, her t-shirt, her pants, her underwear. She couldn’t but be hypnotized by Irene’s movements, that were not at all meant to be sensual, but she was just so hot like that, that Seulgi felt her body getting hotter. She scanned Irene’s whole body as she was readjusting her hair in front of the mirror, admiring each and every one of her curve. She snapped out of her trance when Irene turned around, going in the shower smiling brightly settling herself behind Seulgi as she the shower. Seulgi felt Irene’s s pressing against her bare back, took in a deep breath through her nose to calm down. Irene seemed to be totally unfazed and unaware of what Seulgi was going through. She took the bottle of shampoo, put some on her hand and started to wash Seulgi’s hair, pressing her s harder against Seulgi’s back, as she was washing her hair thoroughly, with the utmost care and concentration. She took the head of the shower and the water to rinse Seulgi’s hair and noticed how she had her eyes closed, with a sort of uncomfortable expression.

‘’Are you okay?’’ She asked with worry in her eyes.

‘’Y-yeah, why?’’ Seulgi replied, fluttering her eyes open.

‘’Just asking. Your scratches almost all disappeared.’’ Irene said with a smile, caressing Seulgi’s cheek, leaning in to kiss her but Seulgi turned her face away. Irene frowned her brows.

‘’Seulgi, what’s going on?’’

‘’Nothing, I’m just tired.’’ Seulgi replied in a small voice, averting her gaze from Irene’s figure. Irene shrugged her shoulders and went back behind Seulgi to rinse her hair.

When they got out, Irene took care of brushing and drying Seulgi’s hair, and the latter insisted to do the same for Irene. Claiming that her leg was broken not her arms, that she could still help her with her hair. Irene kept wincing and groaning as Seulgi brushed her hair not so gently, even though she tried her best, flashing Irene apologetic smiles through the mirror. Seulgi enjoyed a lot doing Irene’s hair, it was soft like silk to her, thick, healthy. When she was done drying her hair, Irene helped her dress in her gray pajamas and to put on back her removable cast.

‘’These shorts give you a great .’’ Irene joked, as she playfully slapped Seulgi’s , making her blush. They ate dinner with Yeri who got out of her room to grab a bite and a glass of water, talking a bit with her sister and Seulgi. Seulgi decided to head off to bed, walking there with her crutches while Yeri and Irene washed the dirty dishes. Seulgi was then soon joined by Irene who lied down next to her, settling on her shoulder, hugging Seulgi.

‘’Is it okay if I stay like that? Doesn’t hurt you?’’ She asked.

‘’Not at all,’’ Seulgi replied nuzzling closer to her girlfriend, who started to draw random circles with her finger on Seulgi’s abdomen. They stayed like that for a while, with Seulgi taking sharp intakes of breath from time to time. She looked at ceiling, wondering if she should tell Irene what she wanted to, after all it had been on her mind since she remembered what happened before the accident. But she didn’t want her to feel guilty.

‘’You know,’’ she finally said, shifting a little in the bed, and Irene propped herself up on her elbows to take a look at Seulgi’s face. ‘’I kind of remember what happened. I think I know why I opened the parachute two seconds late.’’ She said looking at Irene. Their faces were so close they could feel each other’s breath, and Irene had a serious expression on her face, showing Seulgi she was listening to her attentively.

‘’I remember I overheard your conversation with Seungwan, but this you know already. I was kind of mad. And… I might have taken the pills for stress she gave me.’’

Irene caressed Seulgi’s face, tracing her lips with her thumb, looking at her apologetically. They stared into each other’s eyes, in silence until Irene spoke.

‘’I’m so sorry Seulgi, I didn’t want to make you mad.’’ Irene said kissing Seulgi on the lips.

‘’It’s not your fault, I knew the risks and I still took them. No one is to blame for the accident but me. Okay?’’ Seulgi said kissing Irene back. She pulled Irene by the neck closer, deepening their kiss, exploring Irene’s mouth. She missed kissing her girlfriend like that, since the accident. She put Irene closer to her, making her lie on the side of her chest where the rib wasn’t broken, putting her not broken leg between Irene’s leg, making her whimper as she entangled her fingers in Seulgi’s hair.

Irene broke the kiss, catching her breath, looking at a flustered Seulgi below her. She smiled as she her hair before kissing her one last time.

‘’We should go to sleep,’’ Irene said settling back to her side of the bed, but still close to Seulgi so that she was hugging her.

‘’Yeah, we should.’’

‘’Do you want the cover?’’

‘’No, you know I end up tangled in it cause it’s too hot and it hurts my leg.’’

‘’Ok, goodnight honey.’’ Irene said kissing Seulgi on the lips.

‘’Goodnight baby.’’ Seulgi replied before closing her eyes and drifting off to sleep.

 

‘’Just like that,’’ Seulgi mumbled as Irene on her neck, with her hand in between her legs, relieving Seulgi of her frustration.

‘’Seulgi,’’ she heard her say and she whimpered in reply. She could feel her body getting hotter, with each move, holding Irene closer to her, wanting to feel more of her. She was getting there, just a little bit mo-

‘’Seulgi!’’ Irene exclaimed, shaking her body slightly taking her out of her dream. Seulgi shot her eyes opening, taking a moment to what was happening. Oh. It was a dream.

‘’Are you okay? Do you have a fever?’’ Irene asked worried.  She was awaken by a whimpering Seulgi, who kept moving her head to the side, scaring Irene. Afterall she might have caught a fever if the pain in her bones was unbearable. Seulgi looked at her with wide eyes, trying to settle back to reality, as she gulped a few times before finally speaking.

‘’I’m fine, she said.’’ But Irene wasn’t satisfied with the reply. She pressed her palm against Seulgi’s forehead, feeling the heat.

‘’Seulgi, you’ve got a fever. Let me just go and take the p-‘’

‘’No! I’m fine!’’ Seulgi exclaimed nervously. If Irene were to turn on the light, she would undeniably see that Seulgi was having a wet dream, and she absolutely didn’t want this to happen. Irene didn’t care about the protest of her girlfriend, she got up and the light, getting up to go to the kitchen, when she looked back at Seulgi, who had her face beet red, her hand hiding her face. That’s when she noticed. She laughed with her whole chest, grabbing her tummy to calm herself down.

‘’Were you- Oh my god! This is so funny!’’ She exclaimed out loud as she fell back into the bed still laughing, much to Seulgi’s dismay.

‘’Shut up! You’re going to wake Yeri up!’’ Seulgi jabbed back, sinking back into the bed, wishing it could swallow her right now.

‘’That’s so, oh my god,’’ Irene exclaimed once more, breaking into another fit of giggles.

‘’Stop it.’’ Seulgi whined, rubbing her face, groaning louder to mask Irene’s laughter. She smacked her with her arm on her belly and Irene shut up immediately. She turned to lie down on her side, to look at Seulgi, clearing .

‘’I’m sorry. That’s not funny. You’re a suffering woman, as we can see right now.’’ Irene said chuckling.

‘’Rene, seriously stop. It’s embarrassing!’’ Seulgi whined once more.

‘’I’ll stop! I’ll stop! But seriously, though, I feel for you, I couldn’t bear being at home that long.’’ Irene replied in a now serious tone, hugging Seulgi, pecking her on the cheek.

‘’It’s unbearable. And my dad won’t let me come back until I’m out of this cast!’’ Seulgi replied, pressing her face against Irene’s.

‘’We should drop our jobs and run away from the country with one of our fighter jets.’’ Irene jokingly said. This got Seulgi thinking. Could they actually move away? But what would they do? They’d have to learn a new language and all. But maybe next time they have days off they could go to another country, like some kind of honeymoon?

‘’Hey, how about next time we have days off we fly to Europe or something?’’ Seulgi asked turning her head to look at Irene, pressing their forehead together.

‘’What for? And where to?’’ Irene asked looking into Seulgi’s eyes.

‘’For a honeymoon. We could buy rings, have a little ceremony of our own. Just for us.’’ Seulgi said, and Irene felt her heart beating faster, her cheeks getting warmer. She looked at Seulgi’s her eyes scanning her whole face trying to see a hint of playfulness in her eyes but there were none.

‘’Are you- Are you asking me to marry you?’’

Seulgi gulped, she felt her own heart beating faster, she put herself closer to Irene. They couldn’t get officially married, but maybe just something in between them. They have been together for 5 years, that idea had been stuck in the back of Seulgi’s mind for a while now. And she wanted to know, if they ever had the possibility if Irene would accept that.

‘’Maybe? I mean, I love you, like a whole freaking lot, like I can’t even describe it. I can’t even fall asleep if you’re not by my side, for real, I don’t want, and I can’t imagine a single night or day without being by your side. So yes. Yes, Irene I want to marry you, even if there’s no paper to prove it, even if it’s just an agreement between you and I. I want to. So, Irene, will you marry me?’’

Irene choked a sob, sniffling on her tears, as she closed the distance between their lips, closing together.

‘’I love you Seulgi, of course I would marry you. I’ve never been more scared of losing than the day of your accident. Let’s make a trip, let’s get married, let’s spend the rest of our lives together.’’ Irene replied, kissing Seulgi once again who was also crying. They both chuckled seeing their tears, staring at each other’s eyes, with butterflies in their stomachs as they cherished this moment.

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