Irene could see the evident chill of the season and it’ll get worse in time. She tries her best to up the cold so she wouldn’t need to move, and being the sensitive sleeper that she has observed him to be wake Suho up from his slumber. The thought gradually fading from her as she tries to memorize every bit of him; bits she could never in the depth of when he was at wake. The sudden urge to feel his warmth loses her control of her hands as it rises up to his checks, before she feels him nudge. In a beat she takes her hand back and closes her eyes. She doesn’t open it but she could feel him moving with the soft shuffling on the bed. As she feels him leave a subtle heave of the cushions only leaves her a wrath from the unwelcomed emotions. Finally accepting it all; silence, she wasn’t sure if he was still there, she hasn’t heard the door close nor open yet. Just before she could think of anything, she feels him sit again. From the distance she could feel his warmth, he tucks her behind the blankets but it couldn’t compensate for the warmth she craved from him. Just as he was about to close the door, she opens her eyes only to witness him exactly leaving her there.

---

She didn’t know how they ended up being like this and why she asked him to. She convinces herself it was of the chill of the season, but here they are now on her bed. Awake and sober enough to consciously do this all. She was suddenly in his arms with his warmth radiating at her, the curious beating of his heart. Her sudden hope it was for her only ended with her rose cheeks that he concluded it to have been from the cold. Gentle heavy arms wrap her closer and the ever still eyes still on her. Those eyes that she didn’t know what to make up of.

It’s silly but it was true, his brown orbs were never enough to make up of him. Deep inside it she looks at her reflection in it, evidently mirroring the frustrations from his eyes. An unconscious furrowed brow wakes her from her musings as he shuts his eyes slowly. Seemingly unwelcoming anything from her. A disappointment when she feels him move again, she’d think away from her but it only pulled her closer than she could have felt. She watches how his lids willingly took over his will and pulled him to another slumber.

---

Her careful light dab of the cotton to his wound by his waist, she could see from the corner of her eyes the now tightly clenched fist and the light flicker of the vein at the back of it. Her soft sigh, he unclenches his fist, lifting his arms over to his eyes. Forcing himself to numb the wound she was aiding. Feeling a single drop of her tear on his abdomen he opens his eyes to the woman who was now quickly wiping the tears away before it fell on him again. It was her first but she knew this was just one of the numbers he already had.

Patching up he reaches out to her offering to lay with him. The hesitation before him, he pulled her more and eventually had her giving in to him. She lays down with him careful from disturbing the aided wound while he seemed oblivious to it and pulled her closer. The look on her eyes anticipating for an explanation or at least an affirmation for her not to worry. She doesn’t get anything but a cheeky grin. She knows he won’t give it to her, because in the cold breeze she never had him or a part of him. In the cold breeze it was her who was giving. She knew this, but every time, she had always hoped he’d start sparing her some. But a grin from the dreaded boy she accepted, that she has love now was all that she had from him every time.

---

She was looking at him. When all his attention was at the bruise around her wrist all her attention was at his. She couldn’t care less of her bruise neither of the unaided slit by her jaw. She couldn’t care less of the events prior to this with the man’s tight grip on her or the knife settled by her neck. Suho was here on her front porch yard when she barely had him anywhere but her room.

The cold breeze in winter but she wouldn’t mind having him here outside all day. His attention shifts to her unaided wound. His furrowed brows couldn’t get anymore knitted. Unfazed, she searches what his orbs meant. Before she could make up anything he drops his head low. A sigh escaping from him.

The determination of his step away from her and the step towards the said man somewhere by the town. She kissed him. They have had many before but never at the time of day. Always at night when it was always a duel and always eventually lead to more.

A chaste kiss to assure him she was fine.
A chaste kiss to let him know he was all she needed.
A chaste kiss to stop him from leaving.

But the chaste kiss didn’t stop him.

---

On his bed, side by side facing each other with a single blanket wrapped around them. She pulls him closer when the blanket couldn’t spare more for his .  In each other’s eyes, it didn’t take a while for him to spare her a kiss. She pulls away too quickly leaving him waiting for more. His eyes closed as she uttered “I love you.” Eyes still close he rose his lips to another soft cheeky smile of his. “I know.”

“Do you love me?” she watches as his smile gradually fades and buries his head on her chest. “I’m scared.” “Of what?” she was eager this time.  His obliviousness to the tears falling on his bare shoulders when all he spared her was his silence. Head still buried on her chest.

She pulls away leaving the bed. Changing from his shirt to hers. “I can’t do this anymore,” Still anticipating for his voice. Instead, she feels his arms turn her and gently pulls her to his chest, his arms wrapped around her. While she stays idle in this gesture.