am i alone in feeling like this?

Description

this is really not related to any of the tags, just someone
with no other outlet looking for emotional catharsis in the
form of internet strangers sharing their feelings.

Foreword

i'm going to preface this with i'm really not sure if this'll even show up for anyone, or if anyone is going to click it. but, this isn't my main & i'll log out of this after i post it and go on with my night maybe checking in on a different account to see if anyone replied. but, writing your feelings out is helpful and i don't use like... whisper or those blog apps where you can just write out, so here i am.

 

i feel very alone and isolated. i know this is partially due to my introversion, and the fact my interests seem to be vastly different to the majority of people i meet (i'm into nerdy stuff that's like magic the gathering level but not mtg, and a lot of the people i meet are very nice but they're often into tv shows like riverdale or have very extroverted hobbies that have them in groups, like sports or something.) to slap a label onto myself, i think hikikomori fits me (at least to a degree. i'm a homebody unless someone i know takes me somewhere, and even then i get anxious. lol. very fun /s.) it , and it's something i actively try to work on but don't really feel comfortable doing (i would say i'm... severely more introverted than most other introverts, but that's neither here or there.) i've fallen out of my interest with roleplaying in closed rps after two years of doing so, and i can't stay active on freelance accounts because i'm uninspired and it just doesn't feel how it used to. all of the friends i've made through rp have eventually left, and i feel like i'm back where i started. 

i know i'm not alone in feeling... alone, or lonely, and i know quarantine has made a lot of people feel like this at least for the time being. but i guess knowing others that are in the same general sphere as me feel the same would be cathartic. it's worth noting i'm mentally ill and none of these feelings are easily solveable, and i know that, so i don't expect any magic answers telling me the key to me becoming a social butterfly. i'm just hoping i can get a "you're not alone, gl hf" 

and if anyone reads this and feels seen, maybe feels like this but couldn't post it anywhere, i hope it offered some comfort to you too. :) these feelings are difficult, and even while typing this i've just had a bought of crying, so it's ok to be sad about it. i hope we both can feel seen and like we belong somewhere someday

Comments

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winterinapril #1
you're right. you're not alone. as much as i'd like to type a long paragraph, things have been really tiring lately too and i can only wish you nothing but the best. we can get through this.
sIytherin #2
somehow, i feel at relief knowing i am not alone through this hard times. it's an on and off phase for me, however. and right now is that phase. i've no motivation for anything else and i have been constantly trying to find ways how to unwind, there are some tasks i know i need to work on but keep procrastinating.

it's hard, but please hang in there. and to the people in the comment section as well. the situation we are all in right now isn't easy and the least thing we need is any more negativity but please keep holding on, it will be all worth it in the end. things will be better. i wish you all the best and a good health.
berryuwu
#3
Oh no no,you're definitely not alone in feeling like this. I really relate on this and has been feeling this way for several months now. Don't worry,i do believe it will get better. We are on our way there :)
yanfei #4
you're definitely not alone. i've been feeling the same way too, as of late. maybe it will get better, maybe it won't. i have no idea. but the fact that we both are here and still trying is great on its own. we'll get there someday.