Chapter 3: The behind scenes

Joy is a stunning possessing an aura of polished delicate elagance and showing sophisticated quaintrelle.

I was like her before.

A smile could bring a life.

I never seen that smile from her.

An inkling to know if she haven't had a mask to wear.

Or is she like a person attached to it until making it real that I couldn't find to believe.

My adopted parents used to say I'm there lucky charm. The one give you a good karma for I am bestowed the gift of hope. Everytime my parents saw me, they're like something I can imagined to be with. Something to acknowledge I am blessed where I am.

Picture perfect, says the crowd of people knows my parents, anything would be great if I can find the happiness to see that.

Whenever people sorrounds me they seem to have automatic captions saying I am epitome of perfection, the hope brings to my parents life, which I think it's not necessary. When they saved me from my past to have a chance I am thankful for.

Isn't it conflicting I am weighing the scales that weren't there for the likes of me?

Then, why I am asking for something that was given by my parents now. Wherein I am going to laugh this silliness and imagination. If I know, my two cousins will try to console me to pursue again another appointment I am not keen.

A smug smirk comes on my view, so sweet that I cringe. "I know you're busy but those are amazing." He brings a fist bomb to me that I shrugged my shoulders only. I already know that I don't fins it amusing to do it.

"You know you're no fun just like Wendy. But I'm grateful you're not a male because if it is." The nerve of him, his giving an awful eyesight that I can tell he needs to check up his eyes.

I scan the area where he gesture from the things I'm not aware of.

He bend over and wink at me, emphasize the smugness coming from him. How could the little timid boy before became a frat boy? I never dare to imagine the love goes thru on his mind. "Every girls swoon on your feet in no time and without notice that you are. Thanks for my tips as I am certified bad boy because everyone else checks you out. Don't worry I'm not bragging my ability of how I am the best stylist of yours." I punch his guts that he bend down.

See his not a badass. Right, he did not flinch a bit while his smiling to me. Liar. "Chill. I send the things you wanted to have that stuffs. I asked Auntie Abigail and Rosé for it. Don't forget to mention that Wendy monitors us and not only you. Good bye!" Cheekily waving to the other side and to me that found myself to kick his shin.

Alas, before I can protest to Kai. He completely stunned me because the girl was there looking for me now.

Seriously as a child he really is. He reported me to his stepsister that I was here instead of saying that I was at the doctor now. Anyway after he get over his speech, I walk away and took another route to go at my art room nearby at this university I reckon to stay. 

Bad news as I get out of them, especially Wendy I can see far behind. Who knew she was the suspect to sabotage the plan of Mina to get done her last piece, the same time I gave up to notice she was the key why my childhood friend left us.

I gape and took a step back. I almost scream because of her, she was there with me in the place to sacred that has Mina's belonging being Miba. A secret Wendy believe that it's a coincidence Miba is a speck of herr imagination or reality. The story of forbidden love affair that grows to wither by the amount of lies. Sorry not sorry, Wendy but you failed Mina. "Why are you here in this place of Miba?" Wendy asked me, but I know it's a threat to retrieve to spout my alibis.

I could careless tell a lie, but father will assign me to work with her. It's not the best thing to do so far when I can do what I want as I am have a time to do whatever I can. Plus no one knows about my so called open secret dating agency service thingy except my cousins from my father's side and Rosé. "I don't know what're you talking about. My friends needs help which you may see that it's a plural. I know it's hard to tell but I have friends. Uncle also allowed me to go with Kai. Is that okay? Can I leave now?" I spelled out the words deliberately slower than I can find to mock her.

She is not bad, not good either, and mysteriously I can see why I don't like her. Who would want to have a babysitter if you already have a mind of what to do and not to do? That's her, Wendy from the start like to everyone else even she's a mere adult.

Raising of Wendy's eyebrow can tell that Sana is in danger, "Nuh-uh, do I need to repeat my question to you." She met her eyes to see Sana gather all together the art tools that she may not forgotten it's from Miba. She calm her heart down as it's best condition even she feels to show her dominant side to her cousin. "Young lady you're not going to say what you'll do. I am here for I know you're busy with those bunch of fellas like you're trying to be a fairy godmother. I'm calling Auntie Abi to know what happened why you had a cast on your arm few months ago. Tell me, where is that guy who harm you because your plan alter and was endanger a girl. Because of that spike his potential girlfriend." She spit fire, a great amount of time to counterback and reverse the topic into a topic that Sana can negotiate.

She met her eyes to Wendy as like as much from her cousin, "I'll let you know the details and everything of my operations as soon as I have. I'm going to update you about my schedules. Lastly, I will not sneak out in the middle of the night to stay up late and work my until I can barely know what time is it. I will abide to you when you're okay to those. Deal, hamster?" I offer my arms to her to accept my request to her.

Wendy took a an aggressive forward, hold Sana's hand, a mixture of sympathy and sadness crawl in, it may have stop. If Sana could see the difference of what love she have and her, her hand loosen a bit when Sana took a deep breath, Wendy knew she need to stop furthermore. "Sure. You need to know I am here because I love you as much as I look to you as my own sister. Nevermind to those words from them. They're not worthy of you. I am here for you. Sana, don't forget how I rescued you both from almost ual assault of yours because you thought that boy is genuine to his love. I'm not going to force myself to question you again about why you're like this. But love is cruel and pure that you can't be the one to guide it. You're not a cupid, fae, wingman or woman, and you are not Sana anymore. You don't need to be responsible because of a reason you were a scapegoat. You are not the Sana without a family name who is often yield to ideal love than real love." And Wendy said just like she mentioned to her, she is not what she thinks to herself.

It would matter to Sana, but she can't help it to nurture the familiar things. "Is it? Do you think I didn't knew that? Who you think you are? I'm not a damsel in distress Wendy. You know, your a good companion for me and good influence. Thanks for that information. But I am touch of your so called sweet perfume of eulogy to me. I am not doing anything wrong." She darkly chuckle, and push herself to straighten her awkward smile to a smile can see she is indeed too much happy.

Wendy stopped on her way out to defend what she opposing to her. "Are you going to save me? Because you missed out to be something else." Sana dropped the act and closed her arms to Wendy shoulder.

A comfortable audible sigh, Wendy heard but she finally got the hidden message. "It's up to you, my lovely older sister, I am bessoted to fulfill for. Don't missed this other side as I know what you seem to like. I really love you, and I am not your Susannah, but Santana Cruz. I am your younger sister you wanted to believe that, curtain is open because you subtlety asked me on your speech."

She tilt her head, a gesture of gratitude take to Wendy's cheek. While Wendy was there comforting her as well Sana needed it. "Do you think we should be able to know we are in the same boat? Baby girl." Sana searching for any questions to pop up. Neither was there, but a sickening of deceit to access the deepest pit of Wendy. She knew not to trust her or anyone.

Out of rage, Sana throw her phone on the floor near not knowing there's a silhouette after her outburst. "Don't you think it's you. I'm not like you. We are nothing but had a same family name." Title by the way it was, Sana passed by her, took the doorknob with a force she reckless to grip until her knuckles gone white.

Wendy shuffle her foot and look to the person whom she knew the back of her hand, topple over her hand to Sana, stiffness brings to her person she long to say that she will be there always even it's shadow. The person she knows that more than forgiveness and time will take before their relationship get better. But before she left Sana, "The day you were there, the person you'll be, like you are. No one will be ever took that because you're the only one will be on that one particular reason. You're not Sana, rather a Cruz who will embrace the burden that I truly sorry for. I am trying to say is that you are on your own stakes because you chose it. I had already done the collateral damage. Take care, baby girl." And the tears flow to her face, she understood the meaning of her own mother decision to be silent. She goes away and hide under the cap she wear after she closed the door.

Sana took the opportunity to kick the table and wash away everything at the top of it. Scattered, shattered, broken of pieces left on the floor just like her dignity.

Painted of red isn't the end to know she's in pain.

The coldness, quiet breeze, console that it's another day to accept being something she would remember to stop. She prick out the broken glasses in between of her knuckle.

Thought of she dream to be there inside the room full of colors with Rosé like in the past. The show ended as soon the completion to be something she was defined to do. Thankful that Wendy did overdid her time longer than the timeframe before she'll be the successor. 

She was angry to Kai on how he chose himself than to embrace his birthright, Wendy as she's not suitable to be, because she doesn't have bloodline lingering as Cruz, unless the head of the family chose her. Unfortunately, Wendy didn't accept the offer and that's the purpose she ended up to take care something beyond she imagined.

The trust she had on Kai, and the person whom feed lies to her is none other than Wendy. An older sister she has that she wanted to have an amnesia perhaps the disability of Rose too. In case, she love to swap her brain to her close friend Rosé as she doesn't remember the face because of the propognosia. Unlucky to say that there's a side effects to it but duly noted it may not hinder from Rosé too, if it's her she can endure it too.

She hope that Rosé before is still there. 

Drip, drop, tic, tac, toc, the window infront of her was brought to mix pieces of drizzle outside, and a moist from her knuckle. 

Only she knows that change is permanent.

A girl she left behind on the front of the mirror she responded hello.

The things she did to her and not Rosé.

The biggest regret she done dearly to her heart that ache her whenever it is...

​​​​​​Knowing she betrayed both Mina and Rosé in exchange of someone whom favor her to lie from them.

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