i walked into the venue excitement thrumming through my veins. i couldn't believe that after so many years i was finally able to see BTS in concert. as i pushed my way through the crowd to the front the loud thudding of my heart resounded in my ears and everything blurred around me. when i reached the barricade i placed my hands on the gate grounding myself.

 

it felt like i waited there for hours but it was only minutes as the lights dimmed and the beat of "Dynamite" started to come out of the speakers. i've always yearned for this moment and i've seen so many fan cams but it couldn't have prepared for the real thing. the whole stage lit up as Jungkook spun around singing the first lines of the song. 

 

"Cause I-I-I'm in the stars tonight

So watch me bring the fire and set the night alight"

 

i watched as he danced alongside his other members letting the music take him over. as the song progressed my heart soared and i couldn't help the tears that fell down my cheeks. then at that moment as i silently sobbed Jungkook for a brief moment made eye contact with me and i felt a spark ignite inside of me as he physically recoiled. i could've sworn that he blushed as he turned away from me to continue performing. 

 

i smiled and squealed as J-Hope came to the edge of the stage and threw water on us. once again for a brief moment, i made eye contact with him and that spark once again slid down my spine. he quickly looked away running to the other side of the stage as i blushed. J-Hope was my bias and i couldn't believe that he had looked at me!

 

i placed my hands lightly on my face turning red and trying my best to control my emotions. they continued through their songs "Boy with Luv," "Idol," "DNA," "Not Today," and even "Blood, Sweat, and Tears." 

 

then they started their solo performances beginning with Jimin's "Serendipity." i took my lightstick out of my bag and waved it around as "Serendipity" started to play. Jimin bounced around the stage elegantly enchanting everyone and at that moment i understood why he was a bias wrecker! as Jimin sang the last lines of Serendipity i couldn't help the screech that left my mouth at his visuals, he rotated his neck to face towards me and winked at me when our eyes connected. i screeched again, 3 times in one night? happens more often than you'd believe!

 

Jimin made his way backstage as Jin prepared to perform "Epiphany." as soon as his devastating vocals reached my ears i was overwhelmed with emotions. how he portrayed his feels in the song had always gotten to me and i couldn't believe that i was finally able to hear this beautiful song in person. 

 

"사랑하고 싶어 in this world

빛나는 나를 소중한 내 영혼을

이제야 깨달아, oh, so I love me"

 

i placed my hand against my mouth as i listened and waved my lightstick my other hand shaking. Jin closed his eyes momentarily opening them again looking right at me as he continued singing before closing his eyes once again. 

 

when Jin walked off stage V immediately came out after him mic in hand as a spotlight focused on him. his deep voice began to sing the beginning of "Stigma." it invoked a deep sense of happiness in me as memories of me sitting in my bedroom doing my homework listening to this song on repeat filled my mind. i closed my eyes and slowly swayed to the song humming to myself. 

 

"저 빛이 저 빛이 내 죄를 비춰줘

돌이킬 수 없는 붉은 피가 흘러내려

더 깊이 매일이 죽을 것만 같아

그 벌을 받게 해줘

내 죄를 사해줘"

 

as he sang the final lyrics of the song he smiled his boxy grin and waved at me, i waved back frantically giving him a thumbs up. 4 now? something was up maybe i had something on my face. i reached into my bag to grab a mirror but before i could wrap my fingers around it "Cypher Pt 4" started to play. i hurriedly put my lightstick away and jumped up and down as the Rap line along with the other members came on stage. 

 

they rapped furiously but passionately putting their all into the song. i started to 'hit the woah' when they got to the transition into Suga's part. Rap Monster hyped him up from behind as i "oohed" and "ahhed" along to the song. as Suga rapped Rap Monster danced clumsily behind him mimicking my dance moves, i giggled locked eyes with him watching as he smiled brightly at me, dimples showing. as Cypher came to an end Suga turned to me and smirked devilishly giving me a peace sign before walking to his other members. 

 

they all lined up announcing that they had one more song to perform and that they were so happy to see all of us. "Boyz with Fun" started pumping out of the speakers as they sang their lines drawing everyone in as they cheered. the boys played around with each other before Jungkook came to Jimin and soaked him down with water. 

 

 

i turned bright red seeing every little detail through Jimin's white shirt watching as Jungkook lifted it teasingly to the fans. everyone erupted into cheers as i just stood there shocked and embarrassed. i knew they did these things but i didn't know it would be this embarrassing! i covered my eyes peeping between the cracks as Jimin spat water at Jungkook, Jungkook lifted his shirt to wipe his face and everyone erupted into screams as he just laughed and his lips. 

 

as the song ended they all stood side by side giving little speeches thanking all their fans and saying i love you. before they bowed in unison walking off the stage. people started to file their way out of the venue but i took my time not wanting to get caught up in the mob. by the time i got to the entrance i was tired from all the pushing and shoving but before i could leave a man placed his hand on my shoulder. 

 

"excuse me mx?" i turned around flustered and held my bag straps  

 

"uh yes?" i fiddled with my straps anxiety clouding my mind. had i done something wrong? maybe i had unknowingly made a gesture that was offensive?

 

"i'd like you to come with me." he gripped my shoulder more firmly pulling me towards him a little. i looked him in the eyes brows furrowed trying to come up with a reason why he'd want me to follow him. 

 

"um why?" by now people were looking at us and i was beyond embarrassed but no way was i just going to walk off with a stranger. 

 

"sorry it's just that your tickets were upgraded to a VIP+ pass by an anonymous source." i was beyond flustered i couldn't believe what i was hearing! someone had upgraded my ticket and for why?

 

"u-um o-okay i'll come with." i stuttered and blushed as he guided me with his hand on my shoulder to the backstage area. i turned around and could see fans fuming and stomping angrily glaring at me. 

 

but i couldn't believe what was happening. the VIP+ passes were so expensive and there was a reason why they were. because the best thing about the passes was that you could meet BTS!