Taemin

Father says nothing for a long time, but who can blame him? I asked him to marry someone who not only doesn't belong to our social circle, but someone with a criminal past. Father clears his throat quietly and mumbles something to himself before answering me. Instinctively, I plead for him to reject it immediately.

"Son, is this what you really want?" In his gaze I see the uncertainty and his concern. But to free Minho and the others, and keep our name as clean as possible this is my only way out.

"Yes father." I answer in a controlled manner, but everything inside me is trembling. Father calls one of his advisors to him. After a short conversation he turns back to me.

"Well, I will think about it. Surely you can understand." I nod eagerly. That's the best answer I could have expected. It's not a yes, so there's still hope for me. But it's not a no either, so Shindong can't refuse his part of the agreement.

"Shindong." His name in my mouth tastes vile. I hope it was the last time I have to say it.

"Weren't you going to make a request of Father?"

"Oh yes, of course." I slump my shoulders in relief.

As soon as Shindong makes the request I will talk to Father and say that the engagement will not take place. The men are saved and I can get on with my life in peace. And that is what I need now, peace.

"I am so overwhelmed by the generosity of the royal court. About the wish you granted me, your Majesty..." Father is really generous, he is even thinking of marrying me off. How can the people think badly of him? I can't help thinking of the mother and the crying baby in the ruins. Father is generous, then how can it be that people have no home under his rule?

"...I am still undecided. I still need time to think about it." Shindong's words snap me instantly out of my thoughts.

"Oh, of course." Father says, still looking slightly irritated.

"Take all the time you need." Father dismisses Shindong with a wave of his hand. With a bow, Shindong takes his leave and walks out of the throne room.

"We had a deal!" I hoot at him quietly as we both stand outside the throne room. He just shrugs his shoulders dismissively and laughs disparagingly.

"You think I'm going to call in the request before the wedding?" His eyes flash me wickedly.

"You'll get what you want when I get what I want!" With a snarl, he turns on his heel and leaves me furious, and utterly despondent. 

Not even my little Kkoong can cheer me up. She wants to play, but I don't even have the strength to spin a thread in a circle for her to chase. Kibum comes into my chambers and finds me sulking on the floor.

"Your Majesty. You have been in here all day. Don't you want to go get some fresh air?" He sounds worried. I wish he would go back to his old self. He would never ask me, he would order me to and roll his eyes in annoyance. That makes me even sadder. I'm an idiot. How could I ever trust Shindong to stick to our agreement? I sigh deeply and put my face in my hands.

"What's the matter? You look like I made you kiss a hundred babies." When exactly was the last time I laughed today? It seems like an eternity ago. But Kibum's words bring a smile back to my lips.

"Kibum..." I know I am going to get the biggest scolding of my life. But I need to talk to someone about everything.

"I don't know what to do." I therefore say and look at him seriously. He now sits down next to me.

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