Cigarette Daydreams
Its Not Actually Unrequited They Are Just StupidIt was past midnight and I have yet to reduce the possible suspect behind the threats. I'm on my 2nd cup of coffee, my body is operationally working but my mind is long asleep.
I plan to head to slumber after I organize the list from the most likely to least.
My bedroom door creaked open and I hurriedly crumpled the paper and hid it in my pockets. Sana sleepily walked out to the living room, rubbing her eye.
"Heyy, you okay? " I awkwardly greeted, the moment from earlier resurfacing in my already chaotic mind.
"Dahyun, I should head home"
She looks bothered, she must've read it already.
"Sana, it's 1 AM. And I don't have my car, I am sure as hell not letting you ride a taxi this late"
"What do you mean you don't have your car? Weren't you the one who drove me here" she confusedly questioned
"Actuallyyy the thing isss uhhh" I prolonged my sentence, too embarrass to tell the story.
"Mygod Dayhyun. Just say it, you are making me anxious"
"I was at school when Nayeon called me saying you died from alcohol consumption and so I went there to get you long story short Jeongyeon drove us home because I was too drunk to drive all thanks to Nayeon and her stupid bet to whichhh also makes me just as stupid for even agreeing " I switly explained.
"Waiiiit WHAT? NAYEON GOT YOU DRUNK!? I swear to god I'm gonna murder her"
I got up from the couch and went to her, giving her a reassuring touch on the side of her arm before going in for a hug.
"I'm fine, Sana."
"Well I'm not. I'm so sorry for keep giving you a hard time, Dahyun-ah"
I tighten my arm around her, sensing she was about to slip away again.
"Hey no I- I like the hard times you give me. Makes my life a little bit extreme, some sort of like a quest to unlock the next adventure " I joked trying to lighten the heavy mood.
Sana made a short, half-suppressed laugh. "You are so weird"
"Stay the night?" flustered by my own statement, I mentally face-palmed myself.
"Alright" she said hiding her face on my nape. "You are probably gonna guard the door if I refuse anyway."
Sana was in the bathroom taking a shower while I lay in bed uncomfortably fidgeting around.
Every position feels awkward and the idea of sleeping beside her makes me want to jump off a window.
Maybe I should just sleep on the couch but that would make things even weirder, especially when my bed is big enough for two people.
what do I even say, I don't trust myself not to turn into a stuttering, blushing mess.
I hear the shower running off and I frozenly settled on the position I am right now.
Like a real loser, I pretended to be asleep.
I keep my eyes close wondering what's taking Sana so long to get out. I actually started to feel a little drowsy waiting for her. After what feels like forever I feel her settle beside me.
She moved closer, giving little space between us.
"Dahyunnie, are you sleeping?"
I kept my act on with my eyes shut but I could imagine how close she was and how beautiful she'd look with my clothes on.
When she was finally convinced that I was in deep slumber, she spoke after a much long pause. I could sense her deeply breathe.
"I'm so scared, Dahyun-ah. I feel like whatever I do, I'm bound to ruin things" she said letting it out as a whimper.
"I don't want to keep messing us up but somehow that's what happens. How do I not hurt you without pushing you away? " Sana said while she moved her hands on the side of my face, cupping my cheeks.
"I thought long and hard on what to say about what happened earlier but when I saw you, I lost all my words. I guess I was scared of my own mouth betraying me" She let out a tired chuckle until she turned s
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