Genre: Romance, Friendship

Summary: Love or friendship? Chaewon and Hitomi made their choice.

Word Count: 5369

Hashtag: #SSBB_DiaryOfHappyMemories

Diary of Happy Memories

"Do you really have to do this?", Chaewon asked.

"I'm just moving to a new apartment, it's not like I'm going far away. Why are you acting like this?", Hitomi replied.

Chaewon didn't respond right away. They've been neighbors ever since. She looked around Hitomi's place while the latter just continued packing. 

"You're not running away from me, right?" Another question blurted by Chaewon. Hitomi chuckled. She just wanted to ignore her best friend's question but she opted to answer anyway.

"I don't have a reason to run away from you, okay? So, can you stop asking these questions."

"But why do I feel like you are?"

"I have my own life too, you know? It doesn't only revolve around you. Not everything is about you or our friendship."

After a short silence, Chaewon spoke in a more serious tone.

"But, it seemed like you're not the same anymore. Sometimes I feel like you're avoiding me…We don't hangout that often. I kind of miss our bonding moments."

Hitomi stopped what she's doing and responded to Chaewon right away.

"I'm not avoiding you. I'm sorry if you felt that way. I know I don't hangout with you as often as before. But isn't that a given? You're in a relationship now, of course you spend most of your time with your girlfriend. I just don't want to be an intruder between the two of you. And, I'm still the same, I'm still your best friend. Between you and me, the one who has changed was actually you…"

Chaewon was about to in but Hitomi continued what she's saying.

"You are happier now. Ever since you and Minju got together, I saw how your aura lit up. It made me happy too."

Hitomi approached Chaewon then gave the latter a pat on her shoulder.

"Can we continue packing? I really need your help for this."

"Okay."

"Don't worry, I already ordered chicken. It'll arrive soon."

"You really know how to bribe me."

"Of course, I'm your best friend."

The two filled up the boxes as they focused on packing that they barely talked to each other. The doorbell interrupted them. 

"Chicken is here", Hitomi blurted as she get the door.

Chaewon kept stacking books from the shelf until she noticed something, a scrapbook. She hesitated on opening it but curiosity got in the way. She even checked if Hitomi is coming back in before she opened the scrapbook. "Happy Memories", she read silently. As she flipped on the pages, her curiosity piked up even more. She just stopped when she heard Hitomi calling her. Chaewon thought of keeping the scrapbook to herself but a part of her doesn't want to do it. When her best friend called her again, she hid the scrapbook on her bag. 

"What took you so long?", Hitomi asked.

"I just finished filling up the box", Chaewon replied.

"Woah! You're working hard, huh?"

"You needed help. So, here I am."

"Go on, eat. Eat a lot because we have a lot of work left."

Chaewon ate, a lot. But her mind was somewhere else. After filling up their stomachs, the two went back to what they're doing. With less talk and more work, the best friends are slowly getting it done. After spending the whole day together, they decided to wrap up and continue on the coming weekend. 

"Thank you for your help, Chaewon!"

"No problem, Tomi."

"Are you sure you're free this weekend? You don't have plans with Minju?"

"I'll inform you if something comes up"

"Okay."

"Wait, you said it's me who has changed. Did I really change?"

"I thought we're done with this conversation."

"I suddenly remembered it because I think you're right. After I got into a relationship with Minju, I almost forgot about you. It's true that I'm happy with her. Unknowingly, it's me who's straying away not you. I just put the blame on you."

"It's okay. I guess we really can't help it. We're so used to being together but we knew this day will come. A time when we'll share most of our time with our special someone. I'm glad you found yours already."

"I have a girlfriend but you're still my best friend, Tomi."

"I know. So, don't act up if I began dating too"

"Yah! Are you seeing someone?"

"Not yet. I'm just saying."

Chaewon suddenly remembered the scrapbook she saw. 

"Are you really not dating someone?", she asked.

"I'm not", Hitomi shrugged off.

"Okay. If you say so."

"Don't make it sound like I'm hiding something from you. If I meet someone, I'll let you know. I'll probably need your advice for that."

"Okay, I'll get going."

"Thanks again."

Chaewon headed home. As soon as she arrived, she took out the scrapbook she stole from Hitomi's things. She began feeling guilty that she can't open it. "Whatever! I already brought myself to this, might as well go all the way." Chaewon told herself as she began scanning the scrapbook. 

"I fell in love with my best friend" 

As cliche' as it can be, today, I came to realize that I'm starting to like Chaewon more than just as my best friend. How did I know the difference? I just knew. I like her, more than friends. The common dilemma of telling her or just keeping it to myself began. Of course, I chose the latter. Maybe, someday, when I've mustered up the courage to tell her. I'll be able to utter, "I like you, Chaewon".

Chaewon called and immediately I knew there's something wrong. Her voice can't lie. I rushed to her place and handed a pint of mint choco ice cream to her. How her face lit up with a toothpaste tasting ice cream makes me happy. 

When I lost my grandmother whom I'm very close with, I took it so hard. I just stayed at home, I don't want to do anything. After a few days, Chaewon sent me a text. She didn't ask how I was doing instead she assured me that she's always there. As I began to accept my loss, I slowly go back to my daily life. I called Chaewon then she invited me to hangout. She brought me to an Amusement Park. We rode on the Merry Go Round. Unlike others who are giggling on the ride, we just sat silently. Then these words from Chaewon really comforted me. "Life is like this Merry Go Round, it keeps on turning. It won't stop even if you do. Since it's continually moving, it means as long as you live, you have a chance to go on. When the ride is over, new people get in then it starts again. Just like in life, when something comes to an end, a new beginning comes".

Other's memory of the rain is forgetting their umbrella then someone comes to share one with them. But rain for me and Chaewon is different, we let ourselves get soaked. We both had a bad day today. It's so bad that we thought the world is unfair. On our way home, it's raining but we don't have umbrellas. Things just didn't go our way. We can wait until the rain stops or find a way to borrow or even buy an umbrella but we decided to get drenched. It actually felt good. For some reason it kind of washed away the bad mood we had. We found ourselves laughing at each other after. 

I was telling Chaewon about my day but she was busy with her phone while I kept talking. I asked her to put the phone down and talk to me. She did, in a very cute way. She let her phone slide from her hands and it fell in her lap. Afterwards, she faced me and we had a long conversation. I like it when she pays close attention to me, especially now. 

We've been best friends but we don't have pet names or anything. We just call each other by name. She calls me Tomi, short for Hitomi. I just call her Chaewon. Hahaha. There are times when she calls me Hitoma. I find it really cute. She called me Hitoma today and I smiled like a fool as if it's our term of endearment. <3 

Chaewon sent a picture of herself with short hair. I just replied with a laughing emoji because I thought it was edited. Then she whined at me for not complimenting her. She sent another photo rather, a set of photos. That's when I realized she did cut her hair short, it's not photoshopped. I said sorry then told her it looks good on her. As I browsed the photos she sent again, I told myself, "This is not good, I think I've fallen for her again".

We went to a music festival because Chaewon loves to go on those kind of events. With her talent in singing, I wouldn't be surprised if one day she'll be the one I'm watching in a festival like that. In the evening, it got more crowded that you'll brush your shoulders to other people as you walk around. For us, it's not a big deal, we can handle crowds. But to my surprise, Chaewon held my hand as we kept walking. At the back of my head I thought of not letting go of her hand. But as soon as we passed the big crowd, she let go of me. If we're not best friends, it would be nice to hold hands as we walk whether in crowded areas or in place with just the two of us.

I invited Chaewon for a sleep over. It's so funny because she literally just slept over. Yes, we ate and chat. We watched movies rather I watched movies because I'm not even sure if she finished the first movie we're watching. She fell asleep. As for me, I just watched her while sleeping. It was better than watching the movie.

Drunk Chaewon is clingy. She becomes chatty too. After our friend's birthday party, I had to take Chaewon home. She clung to my arm then leaned her head on my shoulder as soon as we got in the cab. When we reached her place, I tossed her in bed. She began chatting and I just let her. After her long speech, I told her that I'm leaving. She told me not to. I sat on the side of her bed while she was sitting down with her legs crossed. Her next words made me froze. 

"Tomi… I… love you…"

For a moment, I thought she's confessing to me. But reality slapped me right away. "She's drunk, what am I even thinking", I told myself. When she passed out, I tucked her to bed. Before leaving, I decided to respond to what she said. 

"I love you too"

Her "I love you" was the alcohol talking but mine came from my heart. 

What's written on the last page of the scrapbook made Chaewon smirk.

Happy Memory#11: Kim Chaewon <3 

Chaewon closed the scrapbook. She let out a deep sigh as she closed her eyes.

***

"Sorry, Tomi. Something came up, I can't help you today."

Hitomi read the message then smirked.

"She told me I've changed when she's the one who actually did", Hitomi told herself. She had no choice but to do all the packing. When she checked her bookshelves, it's empty. Just then she noticed a box full of books. She went over it again as she began looking for something. "I'm sure I placed it here", she murmured. After a lot of digging. She didn't found what she's looking for. Thinking that it must be around there somewhere, she started her search for her scrapbook. Having no idea that Chaewon took it, she continued but to no avail.

Hitomi was scheduled to move in her new apartment next week. Chaewon already promised to be there on the day of the move. All was set but Hitomi failed to find her scrapbook. She began to get worried that she might have actually lost it. On the night before transferring to a new place, Chaewon sent a text that made Hitomi a bit anxious.

"Can I come early tomorrow? I want to tell you something."

"Say it now"

"I want to do it in person"

"What is it?"

"See you tomorrow, Tomi"

Hitomi spend the night thinking about what Chaewon is about to tell her. 

Chaewon did come early. She brought coffee and bread for her best friend. The latter thanked her then immediately asked about what she's going to say. Chaewon walked around the piled boxes.

"Did you pack everything?"

"Yes. Everything's ready"

"You made sure you didn't forget anything?"

Hitomi didn't respond. She just stared at Chaewon. When they made eye contact, Chaewon looked away. 

"Is there something wrong?", Hitomi asked.

"No… I just don't know where to start…", Chaewon replied while still looking away.

"It's okay. Just say it."

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