A/N: Please have a listen! This song has been stuck in my head since its release and is what inspired this one shot :) Feel free to leave any questions, comments, suggestions or anything here or on my cc (which can be found in the foreword)! 

***

You were just sitting in your seat, left hand under your chin as you continue to look out the window. Maths had just ended and it was now your favorite time of the day - lunch. You were waiting to be collected by the two people who (you think of as sisters) were in the year above. 

 

‘Hey, have you finished yet?’

 

‘Hm?’ 

 

You hummed as you turned to your right. Facing the person who asked you the question, who really thought it was the best idea to be waiting for your response with her face a bit too close to yours.

 

‘Oh my god, Yena!’ you exclaimed as you quickly moved backwards. Only for a loud thump to resound in the classroom while you pitifully rub your head. Honestly, with the amount of times you hang out with her, you should be used to bumping your head into windows (or anything for that matter). That girl really doesn’t know how to not give people a heart attack - heck maybe that’s also why her mother always (and you really do mean always) gets you to tag along in everything she wants to do. The classic ‘fine, but only if Chaewon’s there too’, you know? 

 

You hissed at the sharp pain coming from the back of your head. You really should be more careful. You really don’t want them to try and find out what made you space you out in the first place. Your mental scolding was suddenly interrupted by Yena’s voice. 

 

‘You’re the one who’s spacing out anyway! I came all the way to your classroom and you just don’t listen to me! I already tried to talk to you before but someone clearly wasn’t listening. If you don’t believe me, ask Hye!’

 

You decided to take a look at the girl who was busy eating the bread in her hands. You can tell that she could feel the attention was shifted to herself as her eyes were wide open, awkwardly staring back while she was chewing slowly - bread still hanging in the air. 

 

You tried to communicate with her with only your eyes and honestly, you think you did a great job. Perks of knowing Hyewon since she saved you from being hungry that one time in fifth grade. At least you could tell that she was telling you she has no clue what’s going on and was just going along with everything. Or maybe you only came to this conclusion because of the bread. Who knows? 

 

‘See?’ 

 

Just like that, your silent conversation with Hyewon ends as you both turn towards Yena. You’re not really in the mood to argue back so you just left it at whatever she was saying. Your attention wasn’t really on her. Well, if you were being honest, it wasn’t fully on her. You were busy - too busy thinking about your sun. 

 

Now one might be wondering just what the heck this so-called sun is. Or really - who your sun is. The answer came in the form of one angelic, popular girl in your school. You remember how you first met her. It’s so clear in your mind that it almost feels like it was the last few days of middle school again. 

 

***

 

You remember, it was the last week of the semester and you were about to graduate middle school. Classes were only in place to occupy those who couldn’t afford to go on vacation early. It wasn’t like you will be learning anything in the last week anyway. The exam results were out already - and knowing that you were not going to the same highschool as everyone else surprisingly did not make you feel too upset. Maybe it was the fact that you were never too close with your peers. Or maybe it was the fact that you were just another quiet nobody who liked staying in the library to read or to finish whatever homework you had. Nothing too much was happening - it was just another regular day for you. You weren’t too affected by the whole ‘you’re about to graduate’ and the feelings of attachment that came with it. 

 

As usual, you were walking home alone. It was February - still cold but the season was changing. You were making your way home but decided to take the long way back. There wasn’t any homework to be done seeing as it was near graduation and everything was settling down. You were walking aimlessly, just following where your feet were taking you. To others who saw you, you looked like you did not care about anything - disinterested if you may. But you weren’t really disinterested per se, just often lost in daydreams and thoughts.  

 

You find yourself stopping at the convenient store close to the park. One that you would visit often, especially when you were in your elementary school years. You would visit this particular convenient store whenever you were hanging out with Yena. When Hyewon joined, this became the place they visited the most every time they hung out. Hyewon would refuse to join the two if she couldn’t stop by at the store. You remember she had mentioned something about her hands being empty so she has to get something from the convenient store? Either way, it doesn’t really concern you too much. Hyewon can do what she needs, as long as it makes her happy.

 

A little lost in your nostalgic state, you made your way inside. The bell resounded when the automatic doors opened signalling your arrival to whoever was manning the counter. You could hear a faint ‘welcome’ resounding somewhere while you quickly made your way to the ice cream section. You took a look at the selection and you could see that there has been no updates on new flavors. At all. Your favourite childhood walnut flavored ice cream was still full of stock. You took a look and contemplated. A trip down memory lane? Or should you go with your current favorite flavor? You decided today was a good day for mint chocolate so you went with that. As you made your way to the counter to pay, you walked through the aisle where the other snacks were stocked. You decided to pick up a packet of jelly, only to stop when you saw the jelly that resembled the Earth. It was on special, a one plus one deal. You thought to yourself that jelly is still jelly. Despite the Earth jelly looking a little...too blue, you vaguely remember it’s the one with the strawberry filling inside. Strawberry filling is always nice. So you took two and brought it to the counter with you. You bought your items and bowed to the uncle at the counter and made your way out.    

 

You had already started eating the mint chocolate ice cream while you walked past the convenience store. You decided that you’ve walked around enough and should get going. You may not be the one making dinner today, but you have been on this detour for the past hour and a half. You don’t want to worry your parents too much, that is, if they were already home. So you decided to save some time by walking through the park. You made a pit stop at the bin to throw away the now finished mint chocolate ice cream at the entrance of the park. As you kept walking, you couldn’t help but notice all the little things happening in it. You could see there were a few moms gathered in the corner, having a good chat while those you assume were their children were playing on the playground equipment. A few elementary school kids were on their bikes and scooters, riding on the limited concrete path. A little further left was the cute little sand box that you could see some younger children playing in. You remember you were once one of those kids, playing by yourself until a certain duck came and made you ‘graduate’ and play with the older kids on the equipment. Something about being pirates? You’re not entirely sure. You were an only child, so being picked up by a duck and making a friend in her was something you were forever grateful for. You couldn’t help but feel a small smile tugging at the corner of your lips at the memories. As you made your way further into the park, you looked to your right, where the swings would be - expecting it to be empty. 

 

Except it wasn’t. 

 

There was a girl who looked around your age, or maybe a little younger sitting on the swing idly moving back and forth with her legs still on the ground. You could see from the uniform that she did not go to the same school as you. Rather she went to some other middle school a little away from this area. She’s just a stranger. You must have been awkwardly staring at her for a while as the girl seemed to snap out of whatever thoughts she was in, released a sigh and looked up - only for her gaze to meet yours. Oh. So she’s a really pretty stranger. You could see her eyes widen a little before looking to her left. She saw that it was still occupied by a little kid who was still struggling to climb on, clearly not getting the memo that she was not supposed to go on the swing without parental supervision. You could see her awkwardly look back and forth between you and the kid before trying to scramble and pick up her bag. You weren’t really looking at having a go on the swing. Your attention was only on her because she was sticking out a little too much in a sea of children. You opened your mouth to tell her just that.

 

‘Sorry, I’ll be leaving. You can have your tur-’

 

‘Stay.’

 

‘Sorry?’

 

‘You can stay on the swings. I don’t want to go on it.’

 

‘O-oh...’

 

You watched as she awkwardly dropped the strap of her bag and sat back down on the swing. Wow. Even her voice is pretty. This stranger seems perfect, but from the way she looked at you, you could see so much in her eyes. You were proud of your sharp observation skills and really, you recall seeing confusion and curiosity clouding those brown orbs. But what really struck you was the slight sad spark you could see. You wonder what could have made this pretty stranger sad enough to sit on the swings after school has ended. You’re not one to dwell on others personal matters. So you reached into your bag and handed the pretty stranger one of the Earth jellies that you bought just before this. To say the pretty stranger was surprised was understatement. Her eyes were wide open and she looked like she wanted to say something but couldn’t produce a single sound. You looked at her with your usual straight face and waited for her to take the jelly off you. When you could see she wasn’t going to, you decided to take matters into your own hands. Literally. You grabbed her hand and placed the jelly there. Without saying anything else or waiting to see her reaction, you turned to walk away and made your way home.      

 

She was just a pretty stranger you’ll never see again.

 

***

 

Oh, you were so wrong. You really thought you won’t be seeing the pretty stranger again. But fate really said no, you will meet again after being so awkward and creepy. You managed to get into the same high school as Hyewon and Yena who were both in the grade above yours. There were really not a whole lot of highschools to choose from so you were bound to either end up in theirs or some other one a few stations away. Despite popular belief, your reasoning in choosing this highschool was not because it was better in rank. But it was rather because it's where your two best friends study and it was also a little away from all the people from middle school. All of them seem to choose the same highschool that is closer to your home. But you're honestly more than happy to wake up a little earlier and travel a little further to get to school.     

 

It was the beginning of your second year of highschool and you remember that it was a little bit of a big deal seeing as your grade is not the youngest anymore. The new students for the first years were going to have a welcome ceremony that is organized by the student council. So how does this concern you? You could only blame Hyewon and Yena. 

 

You remember in your first year, you were in the ‘going home club’ with Yena and Hyewon. The three of you were on your way home, only to be stopped by Yena’s homeroom teacher. Her homeroom teacher had informed Yena that she needed to get extra credits so that she could pass the year, seeing as her grades were...not the best. The only activity that could get her those extra credits and offered the most credits really, was by joining the student council. Yena didn’t want to be a roasted duck so she dragged the three of you to the student council room with her that same afternoon. Yena successfully joined and managed to somehow bribe Hyewon into it too. Though you feel that despite the bribery (bribery was the bonus), Hyewon only agreed to join because she wanted to spend more time with a certain pink haired exchange student from Japan in their year. You on the other hand got roped into the mess and was too ‘young’ and ‘inexperienced’ to join, so you ended up being a honorary member - a glorified errand boy if you may.  

 

Like the breaking waves, please swallow me up

 

So that’s how you found yourself in the school hall, on your first day of second year. It was still a little early - a good ten minutes before the actual welcome ceremony starts. Some eager first years made their way inside the hall and tried to save themselves (or their friends) a good seat. You were in the middle of helping Hyewon and Chaeyeon with setting up the chairs for the student council members, under president Eunbi’s orders. After everything was set up, Hyewon went to the back to check the microphones with Sakura, while you could see Chaeyeon going off with Eunbi to check on the scripts. While Yena? She was messing around with the lights at the back corner on your left. You just stood there on the bright stage to have a quick look around. You tried to make out what Yena was doing at the switches but the stage lights shining down were too bright. You could only see Yena doing something. You could only hope she hasn’t broken any switches yet. Eunbi would be mad and Yena would have to beg Chaeyeon to calm her girlfriend down. You noticed two first years come inside the hall from the corner of your eyes. The two seemed like good friends, already clinging onto each other. You hear Yena say something and your attention is on the chaotic duck again. But you could feel someone’s stare on you.  

 

‘Hey, what do these switches do?’

 

‘Yena don’t-’

 

You couldn’t stop her. Yena still flicked the switch and suddenly, the stage lights were turned off, but spotlights aimed at the audience seats were . The sudden shift in lighting made your vision a little strange but your eyes quickly adjusted. You turned to face the audience seats to observe what Yena had done, only to see a very familiar pair of eyes looking at you. The spotlight was around her and her friend and honestly, it reminded you a little of seeing the sun in the sky. Or an angel. Something that glows? Your mind isn’t really cooperating with you and your vocabulary seems to fail you at that moment. 

 

This undeniable feeling of attraction, please hug me harder

 

Those eyes were the same ones that haunted you despite only meeting the owner that one time at the park. You could see the pretty stranger’s eyes widen in recognition, a shy smile blooming on her face. You couldn’t help but to stare back. 

 

So this flame can fill up my longing tonight, come to me like that, so I can bloom  

 

Only to be blinded once again when Yena switched the spotlights back and the bright light made your vision go white for a little bit. You quickly bought your hands up to shield yourself - covering your stinging eyes.

 

‘CHOI! STOP PLAYING WITH THE SWITCHES!’

 

‘Sorry Mr Park!’

 

You couldn’t see the duck’s expression but you could hear how guilty she was. You hear quick footsteps make their way up the short amount of stairs and feel arms wrap around you. 

 

‘I’M SORRY CHAE CHAE, FORGIVE YOUR BEST FRIEND!’ 

 

‘Yeah, yeah.’

 

‘Chaewonnnn’ whined the duck, thinking you haven’t forgiven her yet. You could hear other footsteps making their way closer and closer to you. Suddenly, you could feel yourself being surrounded by the rest of the student council members.  

 

‘What’s going on? Wonnie, are you alright?’

 

‘Don’t worry Hye, it’s just Yena being Yena.’

 

‘Choi, you’re buying my child her favorite ice cream to make up for whatever you did!’

 

‘Yes, mother Eunbi’

 

With that, the rest of the student council members got ready while you retreated into your usual spot. You - the glorified errand boy - didn’t really do much. You were standing awkwardly on the side of the stage, hidden by the curtains. You only came onto the stage when the chairs needed to be moved, or when you had to move the podium or really, to move any equipment. But you couldn’t help but to think back to the brief interaction before this whole welcome ceremony started. No, you weren’t thinking of the free ice cream you just got. You were thinking about her. 

 

Again. 

 

*** 

 

Your shy and introverted nature really wasn’t helping you in any way. You don’t really understand how you ended up becoming friends with Yena and Hyewon when both of them were super popular in their own years, along with the other student council members. Joining the student council as their ‘honorary member’ only helped you so much with opening up. Though your circle of friends did open up a little. You managed to make friends with those in the student council, expanding your friend count from two to a grand total of five. An achievement really. 

 

You would like to say that you are a good student - above average grades, does all your homework and assignments on time. Oh and did you mention you were a little ahead with school work? So it was really a big problem for you when you space out during class or whenever you have maths. It seems that your maths lessons coincide with the first years having their sport lessons in the track field and that you can see everything from your second floor classroom. Your seat was next to the windows anyway so you usually did what you’re best at - daydream.   

  

But that changed when you saw the pretty stranger with her class and friends go to the track field for their sport lesson. It’s approaching summer now and the weather is warm. You watched as the teacher made the class do stretches before starting the actual practical part of the lesson. You wonder what sport they were going to play this time. Maybe practice some sprints? Or maybe it was some ball games? You didn’t have to wait long for the answer to be revealed. It was just a regular game of dodgeball from what you can observe. Maybe Ms Seo really wanted the students to have more vitamin D and that’s why they moved this to the grass area in the track field. At this point, you were putting your own thoughts into what you think the people below are thinking. 

 

Your attention was once again stolen by the pretty stranger. The way she would try to dodge despite the ball being nowhere near her. Her awkward fumbling when she catches the ball. The wide smile on her face as she jumped with her friend because she managed to catch someone out. It was all very endearing and you couldn’t help but think how much she resembled the summer sun. She seems like a very warm and bright person. The opposite of you. 

 

With light, the dark falls into a slumber - I get drawn like gravity

 

Now, don’t get yourself wrong. You are by no means a creep - but you still somehow spot the pretty stranger around in school. You feel like it’s a bit concerning with how your eyes just try to find her without your consent. Come on brain, you’ve got other things to worry about. Maybe plotting a ‘how to get Yena to buy you more ice cream’ would be a good start. You don’t even know when it started - perhaps it may have been from the first time you saw her again at the welcome ceremony set up (where you swear you lost your vision for a while) or it could have been from the countless times you’ve seen her around the school, but you’ve noticed that you had started to compare her to the sun. 

 

She was your sun. 

 

The one light that shines on me 

 

The conclusion was quite scary, now to come and think about it. But it also made so much sense. She was bright and warm. She seemed easy going and nice. She’s popular and is basically an angel. She seemed perfect - and if you really had to describe her as a scenery, it would be one of those warm summer picnic days where the summer sun is out but a cool breeze would brush past occasionally and you’re just relaxing on a grassy hill. An odd description, but it works in your head.

 

You eventually find out her name. It was hard not to by the time the third week of school rolled around. She’s the super pretty first year who was not only super nice, but rumors had it that she topped the entrance exams. Talk about beauty AND brains. But you still liked to refer to her as your sun, just because you’ve already coined the term for her in your head for some time now. 

 

And maybe, just maybe, you feel a little special calling her something different in your head than what you hear from others in the school hallways. 

 

***

 

‘So how’s it going with your hamster?’

 

‘Hm?’

 

‘You mean Jo Yuri? The first year choir girl?’

 

‘Choir girl? Not really. Vocal goals? Yes. The duck here seems to have a huge crush on the little hamster’

 

‘HEY!’

 

You only paid half of your attention to the conversation happening in front of you. Chaeyeon decided to have lunch with the three of you today and the girl has been nothing but nice. She even offered some of the food she had made but you didn’t want her to be hungry for her dance club after school. Except the fact that she’s getting filled in on Yena’s crush on a certain powerhouse vocal goddess in first year. You can already tell that Chaeyeon is going to have a blast telling Eunbi about this newfound information. You could only poke around your kimchi fried rice, not sure whether to join in or stay on the outside and observe. That decision was quickly made when you spot the said hamster girl with your sun walking into the cafeteria. 

 

I want to approach you O Sole Mio  

 

You found out that the girl who was clinging onto your sun on the day you saw her at this school was her best friend - and she’s the same person your best friend had a crush on. You paused your poking and watched as the two made their way to the counter and got their lunch, before settling down on a nearby table with two other girls. You faintly recall them as Nako and Hitomi. The two were exchange students from Japan and are Sakura’s close friends from home. 

 

‘Chaewon?’

 

‘Chae Chae?’

 

‘Wonnie?’  

 

It took a few tries but your small group of friends eventually got your attention again. You looked at them with your usual straight face. But you could spot the looks in their eyes. Chaeyeon looked a little worried (and bless her soul for being the only nice person) while both Hyewon and Yena had a mischievous glint in their eyes.

 

‘So is there something you would like to share with the class?’ said Yena, her tone teasing. 

 

This duck clearly knew what you were doing since you’ve practically become friends since diaper days. Hyewon on the other hand was a lot like you - she’s observant and very smart. So, despite her nonchalant attitude at times, she is very much in the loop and caught up with a lot of things easily. You know the duck was only trying to put you on the spot. And honestly, it's working. You’re not very sure how to get out of this one - your mind was only filled with the image of your sun and her wide smile, oh and the cute little dimple that shows on the side of her cheek. 

 

‘I- Uh...’

 

Taking another bite out of the kimchi fried rice that she ordered, Hyewon must’ve thought it was a good time to expose what she could conclude despite not speaking up about it previously. You know she knows. And it seems like she knows that you know she knows from all her observations as she gives you a smirk. 

 

‘It’s a certain Kim Minjoo from first year isn’t it?’

 

You could only look at them. The only indication that you were taken aback was your eyes widening a fraction. The same straight expression was still on your face, but you know your ears were giving you out. You could feel the heat radiating off of your ears and suddenly, you regret tucking your hair behind your ears. 

 

‘OHHHH Chae Chae’s got taste!’

 

You could see the surprised expression Chaeyeon was sporting while Yena had the most annoying grin stretched across her face. You honestly couldn’t blame Chaeyeon for being surprised. Afterall, despite being in the same grade, you were still the baby in the student council circle. It really doesn’t help that with your quiet, introverted nature, the idea of putting ‘Chaewon’ and ‘having a crush’ in the same sentence seemed almost impossible. You haven’t even calmed down from the potential teasing when you were struck with another possible heart attack.

 

‘Hey look, Minjoo’s coming over...’

 

The closer I get, the hotter it becomes 

 

You couldn’t help but widen your eyes even more. Your heart beat was picking up. Your shoulders tense and you froze a little, mind trying to process what Hyewon was saying. What does Hyewon mean?! Why would she be coming anywhere near you? You turned to the side to see, only to see your sun walk past you to put her lunch tray away with her friends. You seem almost invisible to her. 

 

You could feel all the tension leave your shoulders, though you’re not very sure if it was from relief or disappointment. But that only fueled Hyewon’s snickers on the side. And Yena’s terrible attempt at hiding her laugh. Oh, and did you mention Chaeyeon’s iconic laugh as well? Great. You love making your friends happy, but that didn’t mean you wanted them to be happy from the embarrassment you just experienced.   

 

‘I’m out of here,’ you said as you left the three laughing at your embarrassment and made your way to your next class.     

 

You weren’t angry. Just too embarrassed and not sure how to face anyone at that moment. 

 

***

 

It’s been a good few months already, and it’s now late autumn. The air was cooler and everything was still the same. Well - not the same. Somehow in these passing months while you stayed the same, Hyewon finally got together with a certain cherry blossom. You’ve got to admit, they are so cute together. They complement each other so well - both are gamers, both down to earth. Not to mention, Sakura really is the only person who can make Hyewon sit in the library to study even if she doesn’t need it. Oh, and have Hyewon’s full attention even if she was competing with Hyewon’s favorite food. You really need some serious skills to do that. Yena also managed to get herself a girlfriend in the form of the ‘first year vocal goddess’ Jo Yuri. How she stands Yena is still a mystery to you but you do remember her being a cute, shy girl. It was definitely awkward at first, but you do get along well with her. Together with Yena, you three became the Joyuriz unit after Hyewon pointed out that you three look alike in one of the pictures that Chaeyeon had taken during one lunch time. You also (finally) formally met Yuri’s friends, though it was awkward and you’re still very much a shy introvert. You only managed to force out a ‘Hello. I’m second year Kim Chaewon’ before you couldn’t really hold the conversation anymore. 

 

You still have to work on that.     

 

It seems like everyone has changed a little for the better. But for you, you still seem to have that ‘hopeless’ (as Yena would put it) crush on a certain popular first year.   

 

You didn’t want to admit it at first but after some ‘parental counselling’ sessions with your friends, you tried to wrap your head around the idea. No, you did not mean Hyewon and Yena - they would be your sisters at most. You got to admit, Eunbi and Chaeyeon are very supportive and convincing. After those talks, you saw yourself trying to come to terms with yourself and the idea that you were, in fact, capable of having a crush on someone. And that it was nothing to be scared of. For now. It would fade very soon anyway. 

 

Afterall, they were just feelings. 

 

You’ve seen the crushes your other classmates have had in the past, or the relationships that happen. Only for it to last less than a year. Really, these things fade - is what you try to convince yourself. 

 

***

 

...They were just feelings, my . It really wasn’t. Somehow in these past few months, whenever Yuri joined the little group for lunch with her friends, you find yourself sitting opposite your sun. With it happening so many times, it really can’t be coincidence. Though Hyewon, Yena AND Chaeyeon would argue otherwise. A few months have passed since everything has happened and you find yourself doing strange things at night. Definitely things that not a normal Kim Chaewon would do.

 

These days, you often find yourself wanting to change. Maybe it was because of the whole ‘parental counselling’. Or it could be seeing your two best friends man up and finally got their girls. Either way, these days you do feel a little braver and find yourself wishing for things that will never happen. You’re a very realistic person - maybe a little too realistic at times. Though Yena does argue that you’re just really blunt. But for your logical self to be wishing for something you know will never happen? That’s definitely not normal. Not for you at least. 

 

Pray to the stars, so that my love can be protected       

 

Having finished all your homework and everything that needs to be done, you find yourself sitting on the floor in front of the windows again. This would have normally been considered as something you would do regularly if it wasn’t for the thoughts in your head. 

 

Thoughts that revolve nothing about school and homework, but around your sun. 

   

Pray to the stars, I pray like that 

 

Your mind was filled with nothing but her. From her clumsy ways you observed when you see her around school, to her kind hearted nature that ranged from helping an elderly with picking up the fallen oranges to apologizing for having to step over an ant hill in the middle of the pavement. You couldn’t help the smile that made its way on your face. You really are (in Hyewon’s words) knees deep in feelings. You looked up. It was always you and the stars. They are the ones who always stayed and accompanied you at night regardless of whether your parents were home or not. Your parents really loved their work a lot. It gets really lonely, but you think you can handle it. The stars were there for you anyway.

 

Because my love is hotter than the sun, I want to run to you - O Sole Mio

 

You find yourself doing the usual - talking to both yourself and the stars. Your thoughts, your problems, your worries and your feelings. The only difference this time was that you were talking about your sun to them.      

 

This moonlit night, I lean on the starlight

 

There must’ve been something in the air. But you find yourself brave enough to voice out the thoughts - the wants, in your head. 

 

‘Hey, it’s me again tonight...Isn’t it strange? Yuri and Yena are together, Hyewon and Sakura and Chaeyeon with Eunbi. It seems like everyone has someone who’s always there for them...’

 

You silently surveyed your dark room, trying to gather the thoughts in your head. 

 

‘It has always been you and me. But...is it bad I want someone too? She’s like the sun to me - too bright. Too warm. An exact opposite of me. She’s nice. And smart. And pretty - not to mention she’s popular and has too many suitors to count...’

 

You shifted a little to make yourself a little more comfortable and pulled your knees to your chest. You rested your forehead against your knees. 

 

‘I’m just a nobody...a shy and awkward introvert. I’ve only talked to her a handful of times, yet every time I spoke to her, I feel so...I don’t know how to describe it. But it definitely makes me feel lighter. I really...just...want to run to her, even if I know I’ll get burned...’

 

I’ll gather all my heart and send them your way

 

You looked up and leaned your head against the side of your bed. Your mind was on overdrive. You don’t know when, where or how. But your mind suddenly decided that with voicing out your feelings to the stars, they gave you some sort of courage. Courage for your realistic self to be brash and spontaneous for once.      

 

‘It’s okay. I’ll tell her. I’ll do it tomorrow after school ends. I really don’t know what to do with these feelings anymore and I guess I should just let her know...I know I’ll get burned but...it’s so hard to keep containing these feelings. I’m just going to...I guess be like Yena and just tell her? I haven’t done anything like this before but I just really need to get this off my chest. I’ll gather everything and just...let her know. It’s a promise between me and you, okay?’

 

Nobody can stop me, me who is going to you

 

***

 

You see her around school the whole day - almost like she was haunting you. Maybe it was just you and your over thinking mind? Perhaps, you shouldn’t have your nightly chats with the stars. This crazy amount of courage really is making you act nothing like your usual self. Though you can almost hear Yena snickering in your head telling you that it was just your feelings.   

 

You waited the whole day which normally doesn’t seem very long, but dragged on for years. Centuries even. You guess that’s how it feels when you really just want to get something over and done with. So when the bell that signalled the end of school, you quickly packed all your things and ran. You really hope you can catch her before she leaves.

 

I want to approach you O Sole Mio

 

‘Minjoo’

 

You see her turn around, only to come face to face with you. You can see a smile make its way on her face as she greeted you in a small voice. 

 

‘Hi Chaewon, did you need something from me?’

 

You blinked. You’re not entirely sure where to go from here. You don’t think you’ve learnt this from anywhere really - social cues and the likes. But you do know that if you were to be burnt, you’d rather not do it where the entire school can see. You looked up again and told her in the most steady voice you could manage. 

 

‘You’re going home right? Can I walk with you?’

 

You could see the surprise on her face as her eyes widened a little. But she seemed to recover fast as faint pink dusted her cheeks and her smile grew wider. 

 

‘Sure, though I do want to stop by the riverside today. I hope you don’t mind?’

 

I want to approach you O Sole Mio

 

Shaking your head, you fall into step with her. The both of you made your way out of the school and walked past the shops. The two of you had a silent train ride, before both of you got off at the station closest to home. Walking past the park and the convenient store, the two of you walked along the pathway that led to the short stairs on the side of the road. The two of you walked down the steps and stopped by the benches situated on the concrete pavement, with the view of the river stretched out in front of the two of you. 

 

You watched as she sat down and settled her bag next to her. She took a deep breath before releasing it and looked up at you. 

 

‘Are you going to sit?’

 

Nodding quickly, you sat down next to her and settled your bag on your left. You looked out at the view of the river as a cool breeze brushed past you. You closed your eyes and tried to gather all your thoughts and feelings. You’re going to do it and no one can stop you. If you get burned, well - so be it. You’re ready for it. At least you hope you were. You trust your group of friends to take care of your broken pieces anyway. 

 

Let me let me let me let me love you love you right now 

 

‘Hey, Minjoo?’

 

‘Hm?’

 

‘I know it’s sudden...but I wanted to get this off my chest. I hope you don’t mind and will listen till the end.’

 

You could feel her stare from the side of your head. Her full attention is on you and there’s no backing out now. 

 

‘I know, this is simple and my thoughts are really jumbled right now. You probably have heard the fanciest speeches or the most flamboyant proposals out there. Heck, I’m not even sure as to how I’m making any sense right now but...’

 

Let me let me let me let me love you love you right now, right now 

 

You took a deep breath. 

 

‘I like you. Your existence is just like the sun to me - bright, warm and kind. The complete opposite of how I am. I’m not sure when it started or how it happened. It could be from back in my last year of middle school. Or it could be from the first day of this school year. I’m not sure. But all I know is that I like you so much. Too much even. I just wanted to tell you, so that I could get it off my chest. I know it’s nothing fancy or extravagant. But...I really do like you.’

 

Silence. 

 

You're not very sure what to make of it but you do know that you need to breathe. After using up all the courage that came out of nowhere (maybe it was the stars? You have got to thank them tonight), you held your breath. Waiting for some sort of reaction. Or an action. Maybe even a slap would be good so you know where things are going. 

 

But you hear nothing. 

 

Slowly, you opened your right eye and turned your head a little to the right to see her. Only to see your sun cover while silent tears rolled down her face. Was it that bad? You didn’t want to make her cry - you really just wanted to get it off your chest. 

 

‘I’m sorry...I know you didn’t need it and I was selfish for just thinking about myself. You’ve been rejecting all your suitors so far and I didn’t think of how you would take it or - or anything really. I’m sorry, please stop crying...’ you whispered as you quickly opened your eyes and reached out to wipe the tears rolling down her face. 

 

‘You’re an idiot’

 

‘Yes, I’m an- what?’

 

‘How can I accept anyone when my heart was taken by someone already? I can only accept a confession that comes from the right person.’

 

‘O-oh. Sorry. I didn’t know you were waiting for someone. I’m sorry for being selfish, I know-’

 

‘No, you don’t. I’ve been waiting for so long - since the day I was upset over my exam results and a kind stranger offered me an Earth jelly. The stranger gave me a jelly, but left with my heart.’

 

‘I- Oh.’

 

Your eyes widened in realization and it seems that she could see it dawn on you. The tear stains were still on her face, but the most beautiful smile bloomed. The cute dimple on her cheek appeared as she grinned and held your hand in hers. 

 

‘I like you too Chaewon.’

***