Ten

Where She Went
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Diving deeper into the episodes, Jihyo finds that she’s no longer wary of the woman onscreen. 

 

It takes a while but along the way, the actress Song Jihyo starts to become less awkward and more... Herself. Whenever she rolls her eyes and cringes at Kang Gary’s cheesy one liners or hits Kwangsoo too hard on the head, it feels a lot like the person she is now. It’s a comfortable feeling, like she knows what’s going to happen and her body reacts easily to it. 

 

Lovelines come and go, but there’s one thing Jihyo can’t quite place. As far as she’s heard from Somin, bashful Kwangsoo’s dating another actress and Ha Ha is no longer the playboy he is but happily married with three kids and a beautiful wife of his own. Kang Gary proves that lovelines are nothing but working relationships because he’s married and appearing on a different channel with his family altogether (Again, Somin was very vocal about this). The oppas were all along married, so it only left her and Jongkook. 

 

So... Why didn’t he settle down?

 

I guess I’m just waiting for the right person.

 

Didn’t anyone tell him that you can’t wait forever for something to happen? You have to go out and seize the opportunity! Plenty of fish to catch in the sea but it will be pointless if the fisherman never cast his reel. 

 

They are lazing on the couch, Jihyo and Somin, with Sechan sitting on the floor. Jongkook’s filming a CF with Ha Ha (she could never get over the strange fact that that’s his job). Sechan hasn’t seen many Running Man episodes either, so it’s nice for the three of them to watch the show. The dongsaengs are good company, always loyal to Jongkook which made them loyal to her too.

 

Jongkook and her are a team this episode because she was fed up about losing every week. The games and missions are tough, but the younger ones promise her that they don’t do those anymore. For that, she’s happy — it would be hard on them if they had to endure this even now. 

 

Jihyo turns her attention back to the screen where everyone’s running away in fear; it seems like Jongkook and her were a formidable team. She sees their friendship translate onscreen, but they still looked a little awkward and tensed. Perhaps they weren’t close yet. 

 

Ha Ha is shooting an action sequence on his own, begging her to let him go, when she falls into another long lost memory of her own. 

 

“I was surprised, Jihyo.” Jongkook says, his hair looking long and his face years younger. “We made a great team.”

 

“You did all the work. All I did was scream and tell you where to run.” She replies modestly, tying her hair back into a bun. It got all messy after running around.

 

There’s an awkward silence between them as they walk back to set where they’ll meet with the ‘losers’ who have been waiting from the jail. Jihyo doesn’t know what to say to Jongkook. They’ve been filming for months now, but she feels like she doesn’t know her place in the show. Kwangsoo and Joongki do, but she feels like she’s just the other female member, with Lizzy being the young idol. 

 

“Have you been settling in? With variety, I mean.” Jongkook breaks the silence, trying to get to know her.

 

“I think so. It’s hard sometimes, but I’ve enjoyed my time every Monday.”

 

“I see.” He nods. “You can call me if you have any worries, you know. You have my number.”

 

She’s a little surprised by that; he doesn’t seem like he’d want to talk to her after filming. She doesn’t contact any of them, except Kwangsoo and Joongki. Sometimes Jaesuk and Sukjin too, but seldom Gary or Ha Ha and definitely not Kim Jongkook. 

 

“Variety is hard.” Jongkook continues, like he might be reading her mind. “But you’re not just working. You’re entertaining the viewers. A lot of people could easily replace any of us, but what matters most is the thousands of people we bring laughter to every weekend.” 

 

“You think people watch the show?”

 

“Of course. Have you been monitoring the ratings?”

 

“Um, not really... I don’t search them up so I don’t see the comments.”

 

He frowns. “Comments?”

 

“You know, netizens.” She shrugs. It’s a new era of social media but she knows the public will comment on everything and anything. “I don’t want to get affected when I work.”

 

“I see.” He replies, and they see the crew standing around for the final scene. “Well, if there’s anything you want to chat about...”

 

“Of course.” She doesn’t know where he’s sudden enthusiasm came from, but she probably won’t even contact him. Sometimes, you had to agree for the sake of it in this industry. There are other people she could go to, like Kwangsoo or Joongki and even Jaesuk, just not Kim Jongkook. 

 

Not yet. 

 

“I don’t want to be on that receiving end.” Sechan shudders as Jihyo refocuses her attention back on the screen, the memory fading away. Nothing much has changed; Ha Ha is being caught, yelling murderous words about traitors at her for the camera. 

 

“Even when he’s not chasing us, I still get pretty scared.” Somin agrees. 

 

“Hyung’s future wife will have to tame him first.” Sechan adds. “That is, if he gets married.”

 

“You’ve never seen him dating any woman?” Jihyo asks, her interest piqued.

 

“No.” Somin shakes her head. “He never tells me anything though.”

 

“That’s because you’re a blabber mouth.” Sechan scolds, even when she hits him on the shoulder with mock anger. “No, we’ve never seen him with someone. And counting the number of times he has forced me to the gym, I don’t think he’s secretly seeing anyone either.”

 

“Isn’t he old enough to be married?”

 

“Well, we all are.” Somin sighs, forlorn. “It’s so hard to find a good man!”

 

“That’s because—“

 

“I will kill you, Yang Sechan.”

 

“I can never tell if you two are flirting or just bickering.” Jihyo smiles, but she’s a little curious about Kim Jongkook’s love life. He hasn’t really been back to the gym in some time, so perhaps... 

 

Don’t be silly. He’s busy with work now that he can finally stop hiding his schedule from her. Plus it’s the start of the year, he must be planning his projects for later on. 

 

“Unnie!” Somin pouts. “I told you, Sechan and I are exclusively work partners.”

 

“You know how that sounds right?” Sechan grimaces, shuddering. “Besides, lovelines don’t work. If they did, noona would be with Kang Gary now.” 

 

“Were we really that good together?” Jihyo only sees a one sided relationship on screen, and her memories of Gary were strictly sibling-like at best.

 

“Secretly, I thought you and Jongkook oppa should have done the loveline.” Somin shrugs. “Did you watch the episode in the train? He sang to you!”

 

“Um, yeah.” Jihyo nods. “Aren’t lovelines a little tiring?”

 

“They totally are. Somin exhausts me every week.” Sechan chimes in jokingly.

 

“Yah. You love it, don’t lie.” Somin snaps back good-naturedly. “Don’t get me wrong, Gary ssi seems cool and all but you work better with Jongkook oppa.”

 

“Don’t listen to her, noona. The rest of the nation used to fall in love with you every Sunday.” Sechan disagrees. 

 

“Hmph, Yang Sechan. I’m entitled to my own opinion.”

 

“Even though it’s wrong?”

 

“Yah! You—“

 

“Okay, okay. I got it, kids.” Jihyo cuts in before they can start again. These two. They fought more than an old married couple! 

 

She can’t imagine living in the same house as Kim Jongkook if they were the ones in the loveline. God, how awkward! She’s almost glad it’s Kang Gary and not Jongkook too, because if she found out she was in a scripted relationship for the cameras with someone as breathtakingly gorgeous as him, she might have to find another place to stay. 

 

It’s not that Gary isn’t handsome, he just has a different charm. Cool, collected rapper, a little bit of a bad boy vibe. But she’s not like that; she doesn’t look only into looks. Jongkook is good looking, definitely, but he’s also kindhearted. He looks out for her when she doesn’t expect it, and obviously he’s done so much for her this past month alone. 

 

Wait. Why is she even thinking about this? 

 

“At least it’s not Jongkook oppa.” Jihyo attempts a joke, smiling. “He would be difficult to handle, even in a scripted romance.”

 

“The poor woman!” Somin agrees and they share a laugh. “Seriously, though. Oppa treats women politely and he’s way better than a lot of men in the industry.”

 

“Do you have a crush on hyung?” Sechan asks, grimacing.

 

“Why, are you jealous?”

 

“... It’s so hard to talk to you sometimes.”

 

“Why doesn’t he have any lovelines with anyone if he’s so charming?” Jihyo should stop asking questions about this topic, but she can’t really give it a rest.

 

“He does, but hyung cuts it off because it can get too explosive.” Sechan shrugs. “Remember Jinyoung noona?”

 

“Oppa gets too shy.” Somin giggles, nodding. “He’s had multiple lovelines in the past so he knows that they become awkward later on.” She pauses, freezing. “Yah, Yang Sechan. We’re not going to be like that, are we?”

 

“I don’t think you’ll let me breathe if I stopped talking to you.”

 

“Fair enough.”

 

Jihyo really should let the matter rest, but she can’t help but ask one more tiny question. “So he’s never going to settle down?”

 

“Hmm... Probably not now.” Sechan decides. “Maybe when hyung finds the right woman? We’ll all be rooting for him when the day comes.”

 

It doesn’t bring any rest to her curious mind, but that would have to do. The conversation comes to a close and they decide to watch the next episode since they had ample time anyway. No more questions are asked about Kim Jongkook’s nonexistent dating life. 

 

 

Lovelines. Not real, but they leave a lasting impression in her head. It’s easy to see how they bring in the ratings if she’s so fixated herself, even if it’s for all the wrong reasons.

 

She’s not interested in the Monday Couple. No, it’s because she wants to know why Kim Jongkook, the show’s most eligible bachelor by far, is without a loveline and making no attempt to find a woman himself. 

 

That night, Jihyo crawls out of bed after her mind refuses to shut off and she’s been tossing and turning for a good few minutes.

 

She’s put this off long enough. The box Jongkook gave her still lies on the table, it’s contents overflowing with memories. She grabs it gingerly and heads back to bed, unboxing it while she gets comfortable. 

 

There’s tons of items in there — some small and random, like the toy giraffe keychain and the smaller name tag that read ‘race start’, but something else catches her eye. It’s a letter, handwritten too. The pages are crumpled

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Comments

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shrimpasta #1
Chapter 25: this is beautiful, i've reread this more than once since last year but it still doesn't fail to amaze me
karma705 #2
Chapter 24: This needs to be turned into a movie!!! I would really cry so much if they did haha and probably watch it so many times!!!!
bernie20 #3
Chapter 25: Beautiful story...❤️👍👍👍
Thank u so much... I've learned a lot ...it's great and educational...love it so much ❤️
SylileaAnamora
#4
Chapter 25: Oh my gosh, it is so rare to see mental health written so carefully into a story. I love how you were so respectful with the topic. It’s such a sensitive topic that can easily turn into disrespect if not handled carefully. Very few people are able to tackle such topics with ease and I laud you for how beautifully you’ve incorporated mental health in your story. There’s the perfect blend of romance, drama, sweetness, darkness, and pain. Kudos to a job well done! I loved this and I really look forward to reading more from you! :)
Blankji_1530
#5
Chapter 3: Thank you for this au. but actually I am also diagnosed of clinical depression and I know that feeling and the thoughts running inside jihyo's mind even if you didnt really elaborate detailedly why she is easily irritated..

thank you for this chance to talked about this such issue. looking forward for this story.. im drawn to this. thank you authornim!
Blankji_1530
#6
Chapter 1: shocks ... so interesting.
sleepyscoops
#7
Chapter 25: omg this was a solid one. incredible. 10/10 would read again for the feels. it was a total emotional roller-coaster ride, straight from the get-go... and that happy ending is what everyone deserves :') thank u so much for sharing this story w us!! keep on writing!! <3
gendulz
#8
Chapter 25: Hats off to you Author-nim, Two great stories
Keep doing what you doing
I am glad to read both stories, it's been fun.
See you in your next project
Shirass501
#9
Chapter 25: Great story 💪
Really love the entire story ❤️