not so prince charming

janus

Irony builds character, so maybe it does somehow make sense that Noeul is interested in psychology. The joke writes itself. es take psychology, yet, never end up taking their own advice. Noeul is es. And maybe—just maybe it would be somewhat beneficial for Noeul to see a therapist again.

Enter Kim Junmyeon, someone who has numerous doctorates, infamous in many fields. Once, she found a picture of him in an old newspaper article.

Breaking news! Celebrated, local genius has 4 Ph.D.’s at the age of 24 and is on his fifth program

To say the least, he wasn’t very amused. Junmyeon claims that the photograph did him dirty. He wasn’t wrong. Unfortunately, the photographer didn’t wait for him to smile. Junmyeon had looked like he’d been ready to go on a murder spree, donned with aviator glasses a couple of sizes too big for his face. Then, again, she questions why and what he was even doing at West Shore High, subjecting himself to bloodthirsty sociopathic teenagers.

He almost never questions it, but he also never admits to actually liking his job. There’s most definitely a discrepancy somewhere, and Detective Noeul Holmes was yet to figure it out.

There’s also the issue in which she’d known practically nothing about him. Since day one, she has tried numerous ways to get him to talk about himself. Junmyeon would make a terrific terrorist. He gave her nothing.

Zero. Zilch. Nada.

Well, there’s no denying that he does his job well as the AP Psychology teacher. It’s probably why he made so many stellar students cry during his exams.

Typically, honor students didn’t bother studying. In most cases, they don’t try in half of their classes because A’s were easy to them. Junmyeon’s class is overly meticulous, and even Noeul wants to strangle him alive sometimes.

He’s lucky that she doesn’t resort to Plan B.

When she enters his classroom per usual—mostly to avoid a few of her friends—he seems tense.

“Yo, grandpa,” she greets, lowering her voice for a comedic effect. He doesn’t even pretend she’s funny. Noeul scrunches her face slightly as she neatly places her things on her desk.

Junmyeon barely lifts his eyes from the stack of paper he’s grading. “What’s up, nerd?”

Noeul tsks. He indefinitely nicknamed her that ever since he got to know her during her freshman year. In the beginning, he was a pretty new teacher. He mostly assisted other teachers to gain experience, until an opportunity opened up. The child development teacher unironically went on maternity leave. She was not coming back—mostly because the person who impregnated her was a seventeen-year-old.

Nonetheless, Noeul knows she’s his favorite student. He never dropkicked her when she fussed about her nearly perfect grades.

She marches up to him, hands propped on her hips to implicate that she was sort of serious. “Why did you give me a ninety-nine on my paper?”

Junmyeon doesn’t even bother to look up as he immediately goes back to grading. “You still have an A.”

“One percent,” she enunciates, thrashing her hands wildly.

“So?”

Why?

Junmyeon ignores her question. “I don’t have to explain myself to you. You’re perfectly capable of figuring out why.”

Noeul scratches her head. “Was it because I compared you to a psychopath?”

He allows the silence to answer the question for her. “Quit bothering me—I have to put twenty assignments in the grade book before midnight.”

She huffs out a mocking laugh in response. “And who’s fault is that?”

There. Proof that that was his one and only flaw. He was extremely lax toward the most important part of his job.

“Whatever,” he quips, falling into silence as he focuses on his task. When he realizes that she’s still hovering, he narrows a suspecting eye at her. Another thing she learned about him was that Junmyeon caught on quickly. “Something’s bothering you.”

Noeul turns her head slightly, feigning innocence. “Nothing’s bothering me.”

“Hm.”

Between telling him that she’d recently found out about her debilitating disease and embarrassing herself in front of the entire student body—the latter sounded close to perfection.

“I asked Baekhyun to have with me,” she blurts, trying to get it out as fast as possible so she wouldn’t hear the shame in her voice.

Junmyeon coughs out a laugh. “Baekhyun? He’s hardly your type.”

She glares intently at him until he stops ridiculing her with his gigantic smile. “What do you even know about my type?”

He raises an eyebrow, leaning forward to prove his case. “Number one—you absolutely hate group work. And number two—I’ve never seen you as much as bat an eye at boys, girls. Whatever genders you youngsters identify with. I really can’t imagine you suddenly feeling the desire to date.”

Noeul in an offended breath. “Okay, we get it. You’re all-knowing. I never even said I wanted to date anyone!”

Okay, so what if she’s a little heated right now? It wasn’t as embarrassing as earlier, but mildly decapitating at the least.

Junmyeon snickers. “Okay, minus the part about you wanting to have ual with him, how did it go down?”

 

 

###

 

 

The most embarrassing part about her life wasn’t the fact that she was suddenly desperate enough to seek out a false sense of intimacy—but, it was most definitely the fact that she couldn’t remember the last time she was this uncomfortably close to a boy. That was pretty insulting on her part.

And the thing is, it wasn’t just any boy. It was Byun Baekhyun, one of the more infamous names in the halls of West Shore High. On second thought, maybe she should’ve gone to one of his more tamer friends. She’d known them before her life erupted into a colossal fire. She’d at least know them. Noeul didn’t know him all that well to make conclusions. In fact, who was she kidding? She didn’t know a single thing about him. All of her current knowledge about him was based on rumors.

And, well, there were many rumors about him. Despite not being a conventional beauty, Baekhyun is as swoon-worthy as they come. His dark, sable hair—black as ink—falls perfectly over his eyes. And it’s almost as if each feature on his face was carefully plucked from an angel. But even that statement was ironic in itself. He was anything but an angel. Byun Baekhyun was devilishly unattainable. So, for most girls, he was a high-stakes investment.

Funnily enough, Noeul finds herself in a compromising position with him. She has no one but herself to blame. Because at the end of the day—no matter how convoluted eyewitnesses may report of this, she is pressing him flat against the lockers. Still, Baekhyun doesn’t lose his composure, and his shoulders are relaxed. There’s barely a smile on his face. Tiny parentheses. Of amusement? Of mockery?

Noeul couldn’t read him one bit.

“Aren’t you in the celibacy club?” He asks, eyes calculative—probably thinking of ways he can publicly wreck her. Though, he probably meant it as a rhetorical question rather than a serious one.

Noeul pulls back a teeny bit. It was only a tad annoying that she backed down so quickly.

Their classmates form a mini-circle around the two as if they were watching a circus show. However, unfortunately for her, she’d resembled a puppy with its tail between its legs. Baekhyun was the ringmaster. Utterly charismatic with a sprinkle of intimidation.

Her cheeks warm at his undermined insult, but nonetheless, she holds herself up. “We don’t have a celibacy club, but you’ll find that you’ll do better in one than me.”

Baekhyun’s lips curl into a sneer. “Do remind me: who was it that suggested I sleep with them?” He inches closer, making her take a staggering step back. “I don’t have a great memory, you see.”

Noeul immediately prays for the ground to open up, so she could just disappear. She tries not to show him any weakness, but that was probably as good as it was going to get for her. “Just forget it,” she quickly dismisses, trying to get away.

Baekhyun takes one step closer, and suddenly, she finds herself in the same position as he once was. Swallowing, she blinks up to his eyes. “I haven’t given you an answer yet. Did you still want to hear it?”

“Let me go, Baekhyun,” she insists, trying to break from his grip.

He releases her, and she shoves him an inch, allowing her to escape from the gap that opens.

His smirk seems to grow bigger and bigger as more space grows between them. “You know, doll, I don’t think you contemplated enough before propositioning me. You and me. We don’t mix in the same crowds.”

Noeul stops slightly, turning to glare at him. “And?”

“Which is why I think that it’s presumptuous of you.”

Her cheeks bleed red. And as Noeul storms away, all she can hear is the belittling laughter of their audience. It steals bits and pieces of her until the only thing she can fixate on is her own embarrassment.

 

 

###

 

 

“That was—”

Noeul finishes the statement for him. “A disaster. I mean—what was I even thinking?”

Junmyeon offers her a weak smile. “What were you expecting?”

Noeul didn’t exactly expect anything. And truthfully speaking, she didn’t know what had driven her to do what she did.

As she’d gone through her morning routine, a bitter thought came to her. No. Thoughts. A series of irrational thoughts spurred her on. Sent her into an unwarranted frenzy. She suddenly panicked— suffocated in her own skin. And the basis of those thoughts.

The one question on her mind.

What the was Noeul doing with her life?

“If his answer was any different, do you think it would’ve solved your problems?” Junmyeon renders the question into careful consideration.

Noeul shakes her head, shame pouring into the crevices of her exposed heart like quicksand. “It was stupid.”

Junmyeon watches her. “Is that what you think?”

“Have you ever had the feeling that you’re working toward nothing?” She reluctantly asks.

“Well, everyone has slumps—“

No,” she breathes, “not like that. You know—I—sometimes…it’s like I have these bouts of regret and doubts. I guess they come to me when I think I’m doing okay. This morning, I wondered a lot of things. Why I was so sleep-deprived for years. Why I sacrificed my mental health—I just can’t find a reason.”

Her teacher considers her words in silence. “So you think none of the efforts you put into high school was worth it? What fueled you to become who you are now, Noeul? Can you tell me that?”

She struggles with her words, but eventually, she responds tightly, “when my mom was alive—I did it for her.”

“Did she pass away?”

“When I was in eighth grade,” Noeul murmurs. “My father hasn’t spoken to me in years. I think he’s forgotten about my existence. And I hate going home to that place that’s never felt like home.”

He remains silent as if to offer his condolences.

“I’m okay,” she says, trying to clear the air. Her voice is reedy. She doesn’t believe herself, and the look on her teacher’s face says it all. She was a damn liar, a terrible one at that.

Was it getting diagnosed with Parkinson’s? Was it the catalyst? Noeul had no idea of knowing. Everything she once lived for seems naught…so stupidly naive.

Noeul spent her entire life, putting on a pretty smile. So why did it suddenly become impossible for her?

 

 

###

 

 

Everyone has a place they rely on emotionally.

For Noeul, if someone were to hold her at gunpoint and ask her where the last place on Earth she wanted to go was, she was certain that it would be the library.

Noeul, much like the next person, certainly didn’t enjoy attending West Shore, but she had to admit that volunteering at the library was probably the best thing about her day.

Others accuse of her being that girl, you know, the one who uses volunteer hours to pad up her high school resume. She didn’t have anything against those who did, but that didn’t mean she was one.

Noeul did it out of enjoyment. Was she altruistic? No, she’d done it for a selfish reason. Having a purpose kept her sane.

And Noeul loved books. She loved the smell of them. Loved the sound that they made when you flipped through them.

She loved losing herself in another world. It seemed much healthier than choosing an altered state of being through drugs.

Books were her own safe little bubble where no words were needed.

And when her mom died, that was all she needed.

The librarian, Ms. Soto, was a petite, quiet old lady. She didn’t speak much, but she was a mighty person who scared other kids senseless with her silent stares.

Ms. Soto has never really worded her appreciation, but Noeul could sense that she was appreciative of Noeul’s efforts to keep this place tidy and save the elder’s spine from all of the laborious work.

And Noeul felt that she needed a rock. Something to keep her occupied. Because there was no other place worse than her own mind. This was repetition, a coping mechanism. To forget about the intrusive looks and vicious whispers surrounding her throughout school today.

There weren’t many students apart from the regulars, a couple of quiet kids that came in with the same intent as her.

The mechanical whir of the library door when it opens seems to put a damper to other sounds. The tiny scratching of pen markings. Already silent conversations that tune into nothingness.

Kim Minseok, their baby-faced principal, stands near the front counter beside a high stack of books that Noeul has yet to put away.

Normally, his appearance wouldn’t have made her feel so wary. She’d seen him around campus plenty of times, always surrounded by starry-eyed girls. But every time, he respectfully put distance and treated them as children.

Standing beside him, that was Noeul’s biggest thorn. Baekhyun is completely aloof as he leans dangerously close to the stack of books.

Noeul practically drills into him, praying that she could suffer from temporary amnesia.

Ms. Soto approaches Noeul with controlled movement and turns to Mr. Kim, her eyes seeking an explanation for the occasion.

“Ms. Soto,” he begins with a tentative smile. “This rascal was being mouthy, and detention doesn’t seem to be changing much. Which brings me to you as a last resort. I thought that you may need an extra helper around here.”

The old librarian adjusts her glasses, crinkling her nose as she scrutinizes Baekhyun who squints back at her. Then, she turns to Noeul with silent amusement.

“Noeul’s quite good at her job, but I’d be grateful for another one,” she tells Mr. Kim.

Mr. Kim stands straighter, his composure finally relaxed. “Thank you. I wasn’t so sure anyone would take him in at the rate of where he’s heading.”

She merely waves her hand dismissively. “Oh, he’ll come around.” Then, Ms. Soto signals Noeul with her eyebrows. “You’re familiar with everything. Why don’t you show him around?”

Noeul nods, the dread inside of her spreading like wildfire.

When she looks at Baekhyun, something in his eyes switches. It was almost like he finally recognized her and the gravity of this situation.

Wordlessly, she leads him away, leaving the two adults to their private conversation.

Baekhyun follows her closely but remains at a comfortable distance.

“Nice meeting you again, Noeul.”

Noeul startles. How did he know her name?

Nonetheless, she doesn’t bother asking him about it. It wasn’t like she’d suddenly come to an understanding of the enigma, himself. “Can we just forget about today?”

Baekhyun raises a curious eyebrow. “Actually,” he drawls, “you’re going to have to remind me what happened.”

She grinds her jaw together, trying to suppress her annoyance at his blatant mockery of her. “Grow up, Baekhyun.” Her words don’t come out in their sharp intent but are soft and unsure. Which only makes her more pissed. What the hell was wrong with her?

His eyes that shine in mischief tell her that he’s far from heeding her words. And as he leans back against the nonfiction self, exuding confidence and nonchalance—however that works, he says, “if I were to jog my memory, did you ask me to —“

Then, those same pair of brown mischief widen when Noeul jumps in front of him, clamping her palm tightly over his mouth. “Shut. Up.”

She can feel his smile physically grow wide under her hand. Scowling, she rips them away like he had repulsed her.

Baekhyun easily falls into step with her despite her hurried footsteps to get away from him. “Shouldn’t have done that if you were going to chicken out so easily. Who knows?” He gestures playfully. “I might’ve changed my mind.”

Noeul feels tiny goosebumps flare across her skin when he pulls away from her ear. “I want nothing to do with you.”

He considers her words and surprisingly changes the direction of their conversation. “Aren’t you even a little curious as to why I’m here?”

Noeul side glances him as they walk. “Should I be?”

Baekhyun shrugs.

“What exactly did you do?”

“I told Dr. Kim that he was being a massive .”

Noeul surprises herself with an unexpected laugh. But, at this point, she found no point in holding onto resentment, so she pushes forward, “that wasn’t the reason, was it?”

“How'd you figure?”

“I called him a motherer.”

Baekhyun’s lips twitch with something genuine for the first time since they met. “You? Little Miss Teacher’s Pet?”

“Yes, me,” she says, rolling her eyes. “I spent a week on a presentation and perfected it, but he nitpicked it and decimated my triumph in mere seconds.”

His head shakes. “Right,” he says, “forgot that you were an overachiever as well.”

“At least I’m sober half the time.”

“That’s fair,” he replies, running a hand through his hair.

“So?” Noeul announces, clearing . “You still didn’t answer the question.”

“I broke this kid’s laptop because he was typing too loud,” he admits with a scary calmness.

“You don’t sound ashamed.”

He snickers, “he’ll live. Daddy’s money.” He says those two words like they’re anything but a secret. “Besides, the moron was asking for it. He’d known that I was sleeping but was still insistent on slamming down on his keys.”

“You must’ve done something to warrant that, don’t you think?”

“Your faith in me is astonishing, doll.” His remark is dipped and gravelly, sending shivers down Noeul’s spine.

“Maybe you shouldn’t be the bearer of those rumors.”

“Rumors?” He echoes with interest. “What kind of rumors?”

He’s back to teasing Noeul again. . She couldn’t look away from those evil brown eyes. He already knew what people said about him.

They weren’t necessarily bad. He was a walking object, and the double standards didn’t work against him. He was just another uncaring jock that had a lot of meaningless in his group of friends.

“You already know,” she quips, crossing her arms.

“Humor me this, doll. Have I ever once confirmed that they were true?”

Noeul doesn’t understand his question. Okay. Fine. She did on a logical basis. But to process that meant humanizing him.

And humanizing him meant the possibility of being hurt by him.

But he’d gotten his answer clear as day when she’d chosen to purse her lips.

“It’s fine to have your own expectations of who I am, but if I implied that there was more to it and you choose to keep those expectations, what does that say about you?”

When he walks away, he spares her a single glance. He wasn’t coming back.

[a/n] what spurred this on? well, i reread my work from time to time. and i had the urge to edit this. and here we are

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byunbaek_hyun34
#1
Chapter 30: One of the amazing fics i have ever read. It was so much gun and so realistic. ✨❤
Baembi
#2
Chapter 30: wow, i love your writing so much. you depicted all the scenes beautifully and i love how you portrayed all the characters. the way baekhyun and noeul resolved things in the end, they got to be together, and they’re having a baby too! it’s so wholesome. and the way they truly care about being the best they can for the baby and knowing what not to do based on their previous experiences. im crying
Bellalula
#3
Chapter 29: i love this so much i hope you come back for more because I've been binge reading from ephemere straight to this :(( your writing are so good and special in a way it's just IT for me. hope you're doing great
xiuminbaek
#4
Chapter 30: This is so beautiful 🤩. I just know both of them will be a good parents
xiuminbaek
#5
Chapter 29: Hello authornim. I just wanted to thank you for giving us a chance to read this. It's so generous of you. This beautiful story is really teaching me a lot of things. The way you worded them are really beautiful. It took me half of day for me to finish this story. It's never bored me. I just love how noeoul finally come to her sense and start making herself feel important. She finally stop avoiding people who loves her. The build up to her character is really beautiful. Just how she just want to give up at the first place and now she finally accept her life with him. Baekhyun is such a blessing to her. It's the same just like how she's a blessing to him. And then they met junmyeon, sehun and luhan who also changed their whole life. I'm glad she finally want happiness in her life too. I cried a lot when I'm reading this 😂😂. Thank you for giving noeoul and baekhyun the ending they deserve. I love you hahaha. I'm gonna anticipate more of your work too. I love reading it. Thank you so much
xiuminbaek
#6
Chapter 28: This is so unfair to baekhyun. Pleaseeee. I hope both of them will be happy again.
xiuminbaek
#7
Chapter 27: And her best friend gone 😭😭😭😭😭
xiuminbaek
#8
Chapter 24: I hope luhan will be fineee
xiuminbaek
#9
Chapter 23: Oh god. Im so tired of crying 😭😭😭😭😭😭 hELPP
xiuminbaek
#10
Chapter 22: The way she just want to give baek happiness but she's absolutely hurting herself