- Learning about feelings is a process that takes time, especially when it comes to identify them. When Minjoo became Chaewon's world through songs and soft lyrics, she never thought that at some point the girl would become her whole universe.-

______

The process of growing up is all about learning and experimenting. With time, people acquire the understanding of feelings and knowledge of the world around them. It can take some while for some while it can take only a few years for others. Yet, everything starts quite similarly, it always begins pettily, some childish jealousy and tantrums that can for sure traumatise some parents. Then it’s the beginning of more feelings being involved, the like and dislike, the love and hate and the still ever so petty jealousy and pride that animates every single kid. 

"Kim, could you please answer this question ?" 

"Yes-"

"I-"

The teacher asked the kid, forgetting once again how there were two Kim’s in his class. Knowing all too well how hell was about to break loose in his own classroom, the old teacher sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose...And here we go.

"He asked me to answer !" The smaller of the two exclaimed while huffing.

"No ! He asked me to answer, he said `Kim’." The other girl replied just as fervently while crossing her arms.

"I’m Kim you idiot !"

"What did you call me ?!"

"Idiot !"

"You’re the idiot !"

"No you are !"

"No-"

"You-"

"Both of you, out of the classroom !" The teacher yelled over their heated arguments, his booming voice startling the two girls who grew as pale as a white sheet.

"But-"

"She-"

"Now !"

And with that the two 10 years old kids got kicked out of the classroom. In the corridors the two watched as the classroom’s door closed just in front of their nose, their small frame standing there dumbfounded with way too heavy bags on their shoulders.

They simultaneously turned to each other, glaring as they inhaled deeply.

"It’s your fault !"

"It’s all because of you !"

Their glare hardened as they stood firm on their point.

"It was better when you weren’t there." Chaewon mumbled before turning around and walking away.

The Kim’s were rivals, as they had the same last name it was all about who was the better Kim out of the two. It all started when Minjoo transferred to this school just a few months ago... they weren’t made to get along. 

Or at least for now.

____

Teenage time was usually starting around the end of middle school and the start of high school. Kids are now sensitive to the word ‘kid’ and would always groan while spitting out a ‘I’m not a kid. I’m a teen now !’ Before rolling their eyes. 

The only difference was that teenagers knew a little better about the whole idea of feelings yet still didn’t  understand how this whole ordeal worked. Unlike before where children would be upset because of some unexplainable feelings they couldn’t name before, a teen knew the basics of what feelings were and would test their limits. 

Just like how a student would argue back to a teacher because ‘it was unfair ‘ to give them a zero for using cheat sheets in an exam.

As Minjoo entered her new middle school, after changing for the third time in 4 years, she sighed at the idea of meeting new people again and again. 

This was unfair.

Like always she was under the curious eyes of all the prying students who would gossip their mouth off about her for the next 2 months because that was what teenagers liked to do. 

She felt herself stumbling as a guy stuck his leg out just to make her fall. Readying herself for the humiliation of falling down in the middle of the hallways on her first day of school in front of everyone... she never imagined someone catching her before she would ultimately fall down. 

"You moron ! Could you stop bullying others ?" The high pitched voice scolded in disapproval as the girl glared at the guy who suddenly gulped down his loud laughters.

"Now shoo." The girl made a movement of her hand and the guy disappeared in a thunder of laughter and snickers directed to him.

"Are you okay ?" The savior asked while looking down at the girl she just caught in her fall, eyes widening at the sight.

"K-Kim Minjoo ?" 

Yes... it was indeed Kim Chaewon who saved Minjoo from both falling and getting humiliated... Nonetheless it didn’t save her from the prominent blush painting her cheeks as the embarrassment was still skyrocketing.

"I- uh... thanks... I... bye." Minjoo looked down, not daring to meet Chaewon’s eyes.

Minjoo turned around and walked as far as possible with the fastest pace she could possibly walk to… And with that Chaewon stood there just as dumbfounded as four years ago in front of her old classroom ... 

Throughout the week since the day Minjoo arrived, Chaewon would unconsciously look in all the classrooms of her grade, searching for the familiar face that she hasn't seen for almost four years since that day. To her hidden disappointment, no one knew nor saw Kim Minjoo.

Minjoo was like a ghost that no one ever saw nor knew about. 

xxx

It was during one of these late nights in the middle of the cold spring that Chaewon would usually be staying extra hours to study peacefully at the library and to prepare herself for the upcoming exams. She wasn’t that good of a student but she tried her best, biting at the end of the pencil secured in between her fingers and looking intently at the pages with a frown present on her face. She had her earbuds on and was just transported in a world full of the mellifluous melody in her ears and math formulas dancing around in her mind. 

With a sigh she stood up... it must have been hours since she came here. It was time to go home now. 

With a small huff she stood up, taking off her earbuds and walking to where she had taken the book in the first place. She was still humming the last song she was listening to as she mindlessly tried to remember all the formulas..  

‘Right... so delta is b^2 - 4ac ....  or was it -b^2 -4ac’ 

She groaned when she realised that she didn’t remember the formula as she was still hesitating on whether it was a minus or just a positive factor. Lifting the book and gently placing it on the shelf, she froze in place when a loud noise came shredding the peaceful silence of the library, effectively surprising her. 

The light flickered, on and off, until another thunder came booming from above and finally engulfed the library in the scariest of the darkness. 

Chaewon couldn’t breath as the sudden lack of light made her shiver and tremble, she only noticed the loud pitter-patters of the raindrops strongly hitting the window. The rough wind made the window frame shake. 

Life has left her body as she fell down while covering her ears, trembling like a dead leaf in the wind as she crouched down. The light suddenly illuminated the dark place for a fraction of second making her paler by the second. She could almost feel her body giving out  as another thunder broke through the silence, no matter how hard she was trying to muffle her ears. 

She was hardly breathing, her fast inhale didn’t match the exhales, in no way they could match the psychotic pace of her heart playing a dreadful melody in her ears. It was too fast. 

Light. Dark. Noise. Trembles.

These were the only four things that Chaewon could understand of the situation. 

Fear. Panic. Terror

These were the three things Chaewon could feel in this moment as she felt herself crying, it hurt to even breath.

Warm. Comfort.

Those two were the thing Chaewon least expected to feel as she was crying harder while choking on her tears.

Minjoo.

This was the person she never thought would make her feel safe in this moment of anxiety bringing with her the two unexpected feelings... but she doesn’t dislike it. 

"Shush, hey... it’s okay..." Minjoo said comfortingly as she passed an arm around Chaewon’s shoulders. 

Chaewon tried her best to look at Minjoo in the eyes, but they were clouded with tears making it hard for her to distinguish the girl’s features. Minjoo wiped the tears away with her soft, warm gentle hands and her faintest of a touch.

As the light tore the sky apart once more behind Minjoo, Chaewon could only look at the girl who was trying to comfort her... 

"Breath... slowly... like this." Minjoo said again, her voice masking the loudness of the rain outside. The younger girl took Chaewon’s hand to her chest and emphasised her breathing for Chaewon to match.

Unconsciously, Chaewon started breathing slower, her mind finally calming down as her heart went just like her breathing… it calmed down.

Without knowing, Minjoo sat next to the crying girl, drawing small circles on her shoulder in a slow and comforting pace. Chaewon laid her head on Minjoo’s shoulder, closing her eyes as she tried focusing on calming herself. 

In a matter of minutes, her heart was at a normal pace and she could finally breathe again without feeling it as if she was stretching her lungs out while inhaling. 

 

Another thunder shook her to the bone and made her flinch in horror... freezing once again at its loud noise.

She felt something poke her ear, sound... there was sound other than the library’s silence, the constant hits of the raindrops and the loud drumming thunder startling her to the core.

Her mind was elsewhere, transported to another place full of the music notes and instruments. Music was in her ear, making the rain only a background thought as she dived in this world offered to her. 

She threw a glance at Minjoo who was sitting next to her, an arm around her shoulders still drawing circles against the sleeve of her uniform. 

Minjoo only showed her the other earbud and urged her to put it in her other ear as well... silently, Chaewon wasn’t under the storm anymore... she was in a whole new universe full of music and melodies. 

While she was elsewhere, her mind wandering far away from the pitched black library, Chaewon only admired Minjoo’s face as the thunder lit the room enough for her to analyse her face for a second or two. 

Minjoo had her eyes closed, head against the shelf behind them and a tranquil expression on her face... Chaewon mimicked her. Closing her eyes and letting herself be submerged in the music.

______

The next day,  Chaewon had chased Minjoo down in every nook and crannies of the school... only finding her in some secluded corner of the library they were in the night before. She gulped down as she was standing behind the reading girl... 

"Uhmm." Chaewon faked a cough as an attempt to gather the girl’s attention but to her surprise, Minjoo didn’t even move an inch. 

"Uhmm." Chaewon tried again... a third time and even a fourth but still no reaction.

She slightly bent over and looked closer, finally noticing the earbuds in the girl’s ear blasting some random songs. With a sigh she took the seat next to the girl and as expected, Minjoo didn’t even bother looking at her. 

She was drowned in a world full of dreams and imagery accompanied by the sound of the bass and the sweet lyrics. Minjoo wasn’t anywhere near this world. She was elsewhere. 

Chaewon admired her focused expression, her eyes carefully scanning the strings of words, a strand of hair out of place and her emotionlessly repetitive movements of her hands when she had to turn a page. 

With a swift motion, Chaewon stole the earbud nearest to her and put it in her own ear. Almost laughing at Minjoo’s surprised and almost scared face... instead Chaewon simply closed her eyes, listening to the unknown song as she could feel Minjoo’s burning gaze on her. 

Minjoo would have been upset in a normal place as her world was rudely snatched away from her, but as she looked at Chaewon closing her eyes next to her, she almost smiled... instead of doing any unnecessary interaction, she went back to her book, she still had one earbud left... it was enough.

She could share her world. 

______

"About what happened at the library..." Chaewon started... It was already late in the night but unlike the day before, it wasn’t raining.

"I won’t tell anyone. Don’t get the wrong idea, I just did it because you helped me on my first day, it was just my way to not owe you anything." Minjoo replied simply... but they both knew this answer was all but truth.

"Right. Thank you though." Chaewon looked down at her shoes, pensive all of a sudden. About what ? Only her would know... 

She felt something poking her hand, the cold touch was enough to make her look up. The sight of Minjoo handing her one earbud surprised her greatly. The girl had a white hoodie over her uniform... Chaewon had a black one. 

Silently, she put the earbud in her ear.

No words were needed when all she could hear was the drum and the bass of the song, her world didn’t necessarily need words.. just a melody and sweet lyrics were enough. 

As they waited for the bus to come on this chilly spring night, they were both drowned in a bubble made of music and beats.... 

_______

"Aren’t you bored of staying here doing nothing ?" Minjoo asked one day, she was reading a book as usual with the new addition of Chaewon sitting next to her with closed eyes, an earbud securely in her ear.

"No." Chaewon simply replied, not even bothering to open an eye.

"Why do you stay here with me ? It’s been 2 weeks." Minjoo questioned while closing her book, turning around to look at Chaewon. She didn’t understand why she was still here and it has been bothering her since then.

"Because it’s calm here." Chaewon shrugged.

"I told you I won’t tell anyone about the storm incident." Minjoo sighed, still not getting why Chaewon would stick with her.

"Never said it was related." Chaewon opened one of her eyes and looked at Minjoo sideways.

"But-"

"You’re not a bad company. That’s why." Chaewon cut Minjoo off who was about to retort with her own sigh.

"What ?" Minjoo blurted in surprise.

"I said you weren’t a bad company and I also like your music taste." Chaewon explained while sitting up and facing Minjoo.

The silence made the sudden staring contest even more intense, both analysing each other’s face and all their details possible... soft music in one ear. 

"How about we go walk a bit ? Aren’t you tired of reading ?" Chaewon suggested while grabbing Minjoo by the arm and making her stand. Effectively breaking this staring contest.

"W-what ?" Minjoo stuttered.

"Let’s go eat something, I’m hungry." 

And with that, the two girls walked out the library where the silence reigned, to the busy outside world. Filling their worlds with more sounds and more of each other.

_____

The start of high school was just another step further in the process of learning. Minjoo and Chaewon no longer found their presence a simply nice company... they became necessary in one another’s life.

Minjoo, the ever so shy girl who would attract idiots trying to bully her was now protected by the brave Chaewon.

On the other hand Chaewon needed a safe world to come to, this world was in the form of Kim Minjoo and her ever so long playlist of music.

They may not know about how nec