Once everyone had unpacked their things, the group agreed on going to play at the river not so far. Like in the old time. 

 

 

 

Yena was in the water, playing with Yujin and Chaeyeon. 

 

 

Yuri was laughing at them as Yujin threw Yena in the water... she had noticed that Yena seemed to avoid her a little. Since they arrived here, Yena was busy with the others, merely glancing at Yuri once or twice.

 

 

Yuri frowned a little but her heart didn’t hurt... surprisingly, she wasn’t that much affected by it. 

 

 

"How are your studies going.?" Eunbi asked Hyewon

 

 

Yuri snapped back to the girls next to her. Hyewon sat the farthest from her next to Eunbi. 

 

 

"Good. It’s hard but I manage." Hyewon shrugged; she wasn’t going to admit how she was crawling under thesis and papers. 

 

 

Yuri raised an eyebrow at Hyewon who caught her doing so. She had that small understanding smile as she looked at Yuri’s confused face. 

 

 

"I’m studying medicine in Japan." Hyewon said, knowing that Yuri forgot about this.

 

 

 

Yuri smiled at it with an appreciative nod ... but then a glimpse of the past passed by in her mind.

 

 

 

( 

 

 

They both laid on the younger girl’s bed. Hyewon was now in her first year of high school. Yuri, being three years younger was still in middle school. 

 

 

 

"Unnie, what do you want to do later.?" Yuri asked as she was curious about the future. Since they were young, everyone asked about what they wanted to do later… for her it was hard to answer.

 

 

"Isn’t it to early for you to be asking me that." Hyewon laughed while Yuri huffed.

 

 

"It’s not because I’m younger that I can’t be curious about the future Unnie." Yuri said with a pout.

 

 

"Alright, alright... stop pouting now ok." Hyewon said as she pinched the pout in between her fingers. 

 

 

 

As Hyewon laid back down, looking at the ceiling deep in thoughts, she tried to think of what she wanted to do later.

 

"I want to study medicine. I’ve always wanted to be a doctor." Hyewon said with a determined yet dreamy voice.

 

 

"Oh... but isn’t it long to study ?” Yuri asked... a little worried at the thought of Hyewon going away for so long.

 

 

"It is..." Hyewon mumbled still deep in thoughts.

 

 

"But Unnie I don’t want you to go !" Yuri whined while jumping at Hyewon and hugging her... not wanting to let her go.

 

 

"Hahaha I’m not going anywhere. I’m always going to give you some time." Hyewon smiled as she patted Yuri’s head on her chest.

 

 

"You better not. Who’s gonna protect me from the devil duck." Yuri huffed, still comfortably laying on Hyewon.

 

 

"Come on, Yena isn’t that bad." Hyewon laughed out.

 

 

"She’s annoying." Yuri deadpanned, remembering the duck girl. She shivered at the thought.

 

 

"You two used to be so close before... like two magnets." Hyewon sighed nostalgically. These two used to be best buddies, she wondered what happened, probably some teenage rebellious phase or something, she laughed at her own thoughts.

 

 

"Maybe... but I prefer you. I like you better." Yuri shyly admitted, voice low while she hid her face away.

 

 

"Haha... let me tell you a secret... I like you more than my cousin." Hyewon leaned in and whispered in Yuri’s ear. It was supposed to be just a playful joke... but Yuri’s heart skipped a bit. 

 

 

 

 

)

 

 

 

 

"You always wanted to be a doctor." Yuri said out loud as her memory faded away. 

 

 

 

Hyewon froze at the sentence... Everyone stopped moving as well.

 

 

"Y-you... you remember ?" Hyewon asked... her voice a mixture of panic, worry and a hidden hint of relief.

 

 

"Yeah... just came back." Yuri said with a nod. Everyone looked at her like she grew another head.

 

 

"What ?" She asked when the silence started to worry her.

 

 

"N-nothing... do you perhaps remember anything else ?" Eunbi asked with expectant eyes... a total contrary of Hyewon’s eyes that seemed to be reluctant.

 

 

"No... just few memories of my childhood with Yena and Chaewon. Oh I remembered about the picture in my room to." She said truthfully. She didn’t see why she should hide this from them… 

 

 

 

 

 

________

 

 

 

It was soon dinner, Eunbi and Chaeyeon had cooked for everyone and they all ate happily with laughter and loud banters. They were doing a barbecue outside on the wooden tables. 

 

 

"Drink it ! Drink it ! Drink it !" They all cheered for Yena to chug down her glass of beer and soju. 

 

 

Yuri was sat next to her and Hyewon... the girl was a little reluctant but sat down when she saw that she had no other choice.

 

 

 

 

Yuri laughed when Yena finished her glass with a loud ‘ah’ as the burning of the alcohol down made her frown. 

 

 

She felt movements next to her and just noticed her plate being refilled with some meat. She looked at Hyewon in surprise and confusion.

 

 

"Eat it, it’s your favourite." Hyewon simply replied with no apparent emotion on her face. 

 

Yuri saw through it... she saw Hyewon’s feelings behind her emotionless face. The small panic and worry. 

 

 

"Thank you." She smiled at Hyewon who just nodded a little relieved.

 

 

 

 

 

Everyone had drunk a little by now, some totally wasted while others were slightly tipsy. 

 

 

"I’m sure Chaewon can’t lift me up." Chaeyeon said with a laugh while Chaewon turned red at the accusation.

 

 

"Yah I definitely can !" Chaewon said while standing up ready to prove her point.

 

 

Chaeyeon stood up as well and waited for Chaewon... everyone laughed at the sound of Chaewon grunting as she tried to lift Chaeyeon up. She successfully lifted her but only slightly and for approximately 5 seconds only. 

 

 

They all laughed at Chaewon who was now embarrassed as she couldn’t prove Chaeyeon wrong in the end. Yuri leaned back while clapping her hands as her stomach hurt from all the laughing. She accidentally leaned on Hyewon in her laughing fit. Only realising she did when she felt the body tense up suddenly. 

 

 

She pulled away quickly and tried to shrug the electricity coursing through her at the contact.

 

 

 

______

 

 

Yuri couldn’t sleep, the memories and events of the day were keeping her awake. Yena was sleeping soundly next to her. The image of Hyewon was haunting her mind and she couldn’t get her off her mind. 

 

 

Memories of today and the past still replaying in her mind like a broken tv... 

 

 

Yuri started wondering how close she was to the girl, how much she meant to her before... from her memories, Hyewon seemed very important to her. Even more than Yena. 

 

 

With a groan she ruffled her hair in frustration, her memories were finally coming back but she still felt like something was missing... something very important. Her heart screaming at her to remember. The same heart that seemed to malfunction every time she thought about Hyewon.

 

 

She stood up, she needed to get some fresh air and probably a cup of water as well. Yuri didn’t even thought of Yena next to her and didn’t care if she was making noise. Yena was passed out anyway and Yuri had too much in her mind to care.

 

 

 

Going down stairs she went to the kitchen and grabbed herself a cup of water. She looked outside the window, looking at the forest being illuminated by the moonlight and the stars shining brightly above. 

 

 

She wanted to take a walk. So she did.

 

 

The air was fresh and cold, yet, not uncomfortable. It was just what she wanted. Something cold enough to cool off her overheating mind.

 

 

She let her legs walk her, making her go through a small and hidden path in between the trees of the dense forest. The sound of the night louder than her thoughts... she arrived at a clearing and frowned at the sight of someone sitting down the grass... looking up at the moon above them...

 

 

 

She must have made some noise since the girl turned around in search of the source of the disturbance behind her. Her eyes meeting Yuri’s.

 

 

"Why are you here.?" Hyewon asked, a little surprised at Yuri’s arrival.

 

 

"I could ask you the same." Yuri retorted, not backing down. 

 

 

"Touche... come here." Hyewon turned back to whatever she was looking at in front of her, patting the spot next to her.

 

 

 

Yuri just sat down next to her. Wordlessly looking at what Hyewon was looking... the sky and the stars.

 

 

"How did you come here.?" Hyewon asked, not looking at Yuri’s direction once.

 

 

"I don’t know... I just came here I guess." Yuri replied. It's true, she had no memory of this place, her feet walked her there by themselves.

 

 

"I see." Was Hyewon’s only response.

 

 

 

The silence engulfed them. It was awkward but they both knew that there were words left untold. As if muted revelations were kept hidden under the sound of the forest. 

 

 

"Did I use to come here ?" Yuri asked, breaking the loud silence in between them.

 

 

"No... it’s my place. You just happened to follow me once." Hyewon replied, still looking at the moon above them.

 

 

 

 

( 

 

 

Yuri knew something was wrong with Hyewon. She was quiet but not like usual. She was always good at hiding her emotions but this time, Yuri could see something was wrong.

 

 

It was holidays and like always, her family invited Yena and Hyewon to come along with them. Hyewon was acting normally throughout the day but Yuri could see the sadness in her eyes. 

 

 

It has been 2 weeks now. She wanted to ask but she was also scared to know what was troubling the older girl. 

 

 

She sensed the quiet rustling of the blanket, the weight next to her slowly going away... she knew Hyewon left the bed. Like every night since they arrived at the house. 

 

 

 

Like every other night, she followed her through the forest. Silently and quietly she walked behind Hyewon. 

 

Like every night, she watched Hyewon sitting down in the hidden clearing not so far... looking at the moon and the stars, sobbing her sadness away. 

 

 

Tonight however, she took a step closer and accidentally, a branch broke under her foot. She froze and hid behind a tree. 

 

 

 

"I know you’re here Yuri." She heard Hyewon say... 

 

 

Embarrassed, she walked out from behind the tree while looking away. She didn’t dare to look at Hyewon.

 

 

"Come here." Hyewon said while patting the place next to her.

 

 

Yuri did as she was told and sat down next to Hyewon silently.

 

 

"I’m sorry Unnie. I didn’t meant to follow you I-" Yuri apologised in panic, she didn’t want Hyewon to be mad at her. 

 

 

"It’s okay. I must have woken you up earlier. I should be the one apologising." Hyewon cut her off.

 

 

Yuri didn’t tell her that it’s been 3 days since she followed her every night... that she knew Hyewon was going out to cry at night. 

 

 

 

"Why are you here Unnie.?" Yuri asked, finally going straight to the point.

 

 

"Crying to the stars." Was Hyewon’s answer.

 

 

Silent... everything was silent after that. Yuri wondered why Hyewon would be crying. Since the girl started high school, Yuri felt like she grew distant and she didn’t like it . 

 

 

She heard Hyewon sob next to her. 

 

 

"Unnie... I don’t know why you’re crying but you know that I’m always here for you." Yuri carefully said.

 

 

"Thank you." Hyewon smiled at her, a tear rolling down her cheek.

 

 

The night was chilly but not uncomfortable, it was rather comforting, the wind coldly hugging them and the night singing for them.

 

 

"Yuri-Ah... I hope that one day, you’ll find love." Hyewon suddenly said. 

 

 

Yuri thought about it... love... it was a complicated word for her. The word love was a complexe idea in itself, a warm feeling of affection, as well as a shivering suffering all at once. 

 

 

"I have you Unnie. I don’t need anyone else." Yuri replied with a smile. When she thought of love, Hyewon was the first image popping up in her mind. 

 

 

"Hahaha... me too Yuri. I only have you." Hyewon laughed at Yuri’s cute answer.

 

 

"But what I meant was that I hope that the person that you love returns your feelings." Hyewon explained. 

 

 

Yuri felt a small sting in her heart, how could she tell Hyewon that she meant her words. That she only needed Hyewon in her life.

 

 

"Did someone break your heart Unnie ?" Yuri asked instead, grabbing Hyewon’s hand in hers. 

 

 

"Yes... it’s not her fault though. She loved someone else." Hyewon revealed with a sad smile. She remembered how she felt when Sakura told her she loved Chaeyeon... she had buried her feelings that day... but then everything started to hurt since 2 weeks now.

 

 

"Have you confessed ?" Yuri asked slowly as she played with Hyewon’s fingers.

 

 

"No." Hyewon laughed bitterly.

 

 

"Unnie ! You should confess ! Who knows maybe she’ll return your feelings." Yuri exclaimed.

 

 

"She’s already dating someone now." Hyewon explained. Sakura was dating Chaeyeon for 2 weeks now... and somehow it hurt her even more.

 

 

"Oh... " Yuri stayed silent after that. She was thinking of a way to make the older girl smile.

 

 

"Unnie, I’ll give you all the love you need." She said suddenly as she gave Hyewon a warm hug.

 

 

"Haha Yuri you’re the best." Hyewon laughed as she reciprocated the hug.

 

 

"I know I am." Yuri joked. 

 

 

 

"You deserve the best Yuri. I’d fight anyone hurting you." Hyewon said as she fondly looked at Yuri.

 

 

Yuri laughed although part of her wanted to say that Hyewon was the best so she didn’t deserve anything else.

 

 

 

"Let’s stop thinking." Hyewon suddenly said as she pulled them both to lie down on the grass. Their eyes looking up at the stars shining down for them. 

 

 

"Unnie, don’t cry to the stars again." Yuri said as she looked up to the bright lights illuminating the dark night.

 

 

"I won’t anymore." Hyewon replied as she squeezed Yuri’s hand in hers.

 

 

 

 

)

 

 

 

 

Yuri felt a tear roll down her cheek. The memory tearing her heart apart... the feelings coming back... yet, she remembered how Hyewon looked that night, the fond smile on her lips... 

 

 

Yuri thought about it... Hyewon may not return her feelings. That’s maybe why the others didn’t want to mention the other girl. That must be. 

 

 

"Why are you crying ?" Hyewon asked next to her.

 

 

"I’m crying to the stars." That was Yuri’s reply... making Hyewon know that she remembered this. 

 

 

Hyewon’s breath hitched at the familiar reply... but she composed herself quickly and decided to go along the flow.

 

 

Yuri was still thinking about it... she had feelings for Hyewon in the past... what happened next. Did she confess, did she keep them to herself, did Hyewon break her heart...

 

 

So many questions.

 

 

"Yuri-Ah... I hope that one day, you’ll find love." Hyewon suddenly said... 

 

 

So Yuri did get her heart broken... she assumed so at least.. It would explain a lot. Yuri stayed silent as her mind was racing, her heart tearing further apart at the thought of Hyewon rejecting her. She hoped she would never remember. 

 

 

She didn’t want to remember this.

 

 

"Let’s stop thinking." Hyewon pulled her to lie down on the grass and as expected, her eyes were filled by the sight of the stars shining, pushing her thoughts away... 

 

 

"Yuri-Ah... don’t cry to the stars when they are shining for you." Hyewon said one last time as she also looked above them to the same lights. 

 

 

 

 

_____

 

 

 

Yuri avoided Hyewon after that, she didn’t want to remember or to feel her heart breaking again. She didn’t want to remember anymore. It hurt so much to do so. 

 

 

She finally understood why the others always avoided talking about Hyewon, it was probably to protect her from the heartbreak... 

 

 

She spent a lot of time with Yena. Her girlfriend was confused as to why Yuri was so clingy suddenly but didn’t question it either. Hyewon also was missing most of the time. Yuri spent her time with Yena but something in her heart had shifted… it wasn’t the same anymore. 

 

It’s been 3 days since their talk. It’s been 3 days since she cried to the stars. 

 

 

They were staying a