BAEKHYUN

"Sehun, can you come and look after Y/n? I can't postpone my recording for the second time." I fastened my seatbelt, getting ready to leave for my recording even when I'm still tired from the flight.

We had to go back right after the burial since I'm being scolded for rescheduling the recording of my new songs. The passing of Y/n's grandmother was unexpected, thus, prolonging the time we have to stay there when we only came to visit her.

As much as I don't want to leave Y/n now that she's sad, there's nothing that I could do but let her rest and leave her to Sehun - who had comforted her more than once.

"Where is she?"

"She's just in her room, crying."

"Hyung... What did you do this time?"

"I did nothing, Sehun! She lost a loved one, what do you expect for her to feel?" that came out angrier than intended. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath to calm down, reminding myself that Sehun knew nothing and I can't blame him. I'm just frustrated that I couldn't or more like I don't know how to cheer her up, it felt unfair that she did a lot to comfort me when I was having a hard time, but I can't even think of one thing to make her feel better.

"I didn't know, hyung. I'm sorry."

"She doesn't want to talk about it that's why she didn't tell you. Y/n hasn't been talking since the funeral and refused to touch her phone."

Sehun sighed from the other line. "Chanyeol hyung and I will be right there."

I hang up and mindlessly threw my phone on the seat beside me. Shock surge in me in a matter of second as I gasped. "I'm sorry-" but then I remember that Y/n is currently not on her usual seat to join me going to my schedules. I thought I accidentally hit her with my phone.

Having the remaining half of the day to spare, I managed to record two songs and the rest will follow. They had to cut the recording short considering that I just came back from another country and only had a short time of rest. A progress is all we needed to accomplish for today.

"What's my next schedule?" I asked, stretching my arms as soon as I got out of the isolation booth after recording the last song.

"I don't know, why are you asking me?"

My eyes rolled and stilled on the side while I'm processing my own question that I accidentally asked to the producer. "That was supposed to be for my manager. I forgot she's not here with me today."

Trails of restraint giggles from the staffs were heard shortly after I said those. I spared them a confused glance, making them stop.

"I guess that's it for today?"

Once dismissed, I left SM, drove off and soon found myself strolling around the mall, still wondering which store should I go in to get something that may console my manager. I have been thinking even before flying back home, but there's nothing in my mind. How do you cheer someone up who's grieving? Do I give them something they like or say encouraging words?

As I'm not really good at comforting through words, gestures had always been my way and I mostly go with hugging. That usually is effective to everyone else but Y/n. She seems to be a different kind of person that I still have to read thoroughly for me to know how to precisely respond to her emotions, needs, actions and such.

Like how she exerted a lot of effort to make me feel better, I'll be doing the same and I won't ever go home until I get something to give her.

I stood in the middle of nowhere, lost and bewildered. Should I ask for help? As much as it's embarrassing, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and reluctantly dialed my brother, Baekbeom. Since he knows, he's the only person I could trust for matters like this.

"Hyun? What's up?"

"Hyung... When you fight with sister-in-law, what do you do to make up with her?"

Though Seoyul and Siwoo could be heard happily screaming in the background, the hint of teasing in the way he chuckled was evident. "What did you do to your manager this time?"

"I didn't- seriously why is everyone assuming I did something bad to her?"

"Because you were," that left me speechless. I know that I wasn't a good person to her from the beginning, but as what she said, it's either people change or people wanted change; I wanted both.

Which is why I try my very best to make up to those times I treated her bad. After these waves of unexplainable emotions hit me upon knowing I've been hurting a fan, change occurred - in terms of me as Y/n's idol and to our relationship at work. I wanted to restore how she'd see me before getting the job as my manager, how she looked up to me as her favorite singer. And maybe... A little more of what we currently have for each other, a change of relationship?

"And to answer your question, I'd apologize to your sister-in-law."

"I thought you are the romantic type to give her something, I was trying to get some ideas." he whistled at that. "Don't get me wrong. My manager lost a loved one and has been sad that she couldn't work. I want to cheer her up."

"Well, I don't have any idea too. Apologizing and consoling are different. The least that I could tell you is to give her something that instantly reminded you of her when you saw it. I mean, your manager likes you, it would mean a lot to her."

"Thanks, hyung." and the call ended.

Now I'm back to wondering, what are the things that reminds me of her? Seeing my phone that she bought me, I can't get her the same as the one I gave her is still as good as new. A car? No, she didn't know how to drive. A puppy? We have Mongryong. A blanket? Since she likes wrapping herself in them. Eomma just gave her one. I want to give her something that she haven't gotten from someone before.

"Baekhyun hyung!" a poke on my back interrupted me, it was Jongin, who looked like he just bought new sets of Lego for himself to play with. "I rarely see you going out, what's up?"

"Jongin, what's a thing that may console someone grieving?"

He pushed his lips up and squinted his eyes. "I don't know. But puzzles like these can help sorting out your mind." and he showed me the paper bags he's holding, containing the box Lego.

I rolled my eyes and it unexpectedly caught a glimpse of something that instantly reminded me of Y/n. "Right..." I whispered. How did I not think of that when it's her most favorite. "Strawberries."

"What?"

I ignored Jongin and walked towards the store where I saw the strawberry pillow that could be seen from the glass window. And that's not the only strawberry thing sold in there, I'm sure Y/n would like to see this place.

"Strawberries, Y/n likes them."

I stared at Jongin. "How do you know?"

"We're closer than you thought." he bobbed his shoulders. "And I know who you wanted to console. Sehun told me why EXO-SC can't rehearse today and it's because they're looking after Y/n. I hope she's fine now by the way, losing someone is beyond painful." Jongin takes a closer look at a stuffed strawberry keychain.

"As much as I wanted to personally give this to her, I still have to make a dance for your Japan debut." he pulls one keychain and hands it to me.

She sure does have a lot of male friends who cares for her...

----

A widely grinning Chanyeol is the first thing that has to greet me once I got inside my apartment after a long day. "Where's Sehun?" I asked, walking past him to drop the things I bought for Y/n on the couch and then go straight to the kitchen to prepare the foods I ordered along the way home.

"He's at Y/n's. He has been there for a while now." his voice hinted teasing and when I looked back at him, he was trying not to smirk. "Who knows what they talked about or did."

I exited the kitchen and proceeded to the bedroom without saying anything, kind of annoyed with Chanyeol's presence, especially when he follows me to my room to lean against the doorway with his arms folded.

"Sehun and Y/n have been good friends, you know? He's always a good comfort to her when you make her upset." he says as a matter of fact. One of my hand subconsciously curls on the hem of my shirt that I was about to take off, regret washing over my entire being yet again as I get reminded of how I was to her back then.

I'm trying to live forgetting that part of our lives by making up to those times I was an to her. He knows that, why is he trying to make me feel bad right now?

"Anyway they'll make a good pair. That's why I ship them."

I snapped my head and shot him a glare. "Say that again."

"I ship them," he answers bravely, his lopsided grin widening too much for my liking. "Aren't you being a little too harsh to your manager? Let her love, Baek."

"She's my fan."

"But that doesn't mean she can't have a life of her own. What our fans had for us is platonic love, Baekhyun." he walks further inside the room and I'd follow his movement with my eyes until he's standing behind me. "They get overwhelmed with that emotion and think that they're in love with us in a way that they mistook platonic love as romantic."

Is he saying... Y/n's just overwhelmed that she's interacting with me everyday? That what she's showing me is not everything, and there will be more once she finds that romantic love to someone that is not me?

"One day, they will find the love they seek, and we'll just be a fragment of their memories. They'd be looking back, giggling and cringing to those times they thought they're in love with us and realize the difference between now and then." he reached for my shoulder. "Y/n's life doesn't revolve around you. Cut her some slack, she's been putting up with you since the very beginning." with one last squeeze on my shoulder, he leaves the room, closing the door behind him.

I was left wondering where this peculiar stinging in my chest came from. Chanyeol's words? I didn't like knowing that maybe what Y/n felt for me is that platonic love. It would have been better if I didn't know what she actually has and I never knew that there's two types of love fans could feel towards their idols. They just love me and that's it, no figuring out if they're seeing their future with me or with someone else.

Right... She's dating France.

So, when she professed her feelings to me, she didn't really mean it? Y/n only bravely said that she likes me, for being overwhelmed with the amount of interaction we could have in a day. Now she's stepping a foot on the stage of her fangirl life in which she is finding that romantic love to someone, leaving me to stay as a mere memory of her fangirl life.

Then that proves Chanyeol's judgement is wrong. He thought I'm being harsh to Y/n because she's my fan and it appeared like I never allowed her to get a life of her own, but she's dating.

With my hands curling and lips pursed, I strode towards the door. "I wasn't 'harsh' to her," I said as soon as I'm out of the bedroom, making Chanyeol turn his head to look at me. "I just don't want you to get her fired by shipping her to Sehun. I never imprisoned Y/n to only set her eyes on me just because she's my fan. In fact, she's dating."

"Huh?" his huge eyes blinked, disbelief taking over them and he slowly walks up to me. "Y/n's dating someone?"

"A foreign, young business man that goes by the name France." I frowned. "They met at France when we went there for my Privé-related schedule."

"That very handsome model of your clothing line?" Chanyeol gasps after I nodded to confirm that. "Damn, she's something else."

But he suddenly whimpers, as if in pain, and clutches his shirt leveling his heart. "My ship... I feel so much pain in my heart." and fakes an ugly crying sound. "Sehun, my man, you lost." he drops on the floor on his knees and lowered his head, eyes closed as if he just got defeated in a war.

Our gazes whipped to the door when we heard the password being entered. Sehun ca