Confidante

Against The Grain
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There were two types of people in the world: people who considered themselves a morning person, and people who did not.

Joohyun could no longer think of herself as a morning person. She had stayed up late the night before, wanting to finish a batch of reports before going to sleep. Even though it was a fine morning, she had no desire to get out of bed.

On the contrary, Moonbyul was full of energy. Merrily, she made her way to the Queen’s residence. She wanted to put all that energy to good use, so when she saw that Seulgi was exercising, she suggested that they spar together.

After a few rounds, Moonbyul groaned, though not in exhaustion. “Seulgi, you keep losing!” She complained. “I know you can do better than that. You were the trainee with the best performance and that’s why you got the job as the Queen’s personal guard. Am I supposed to just accept that you would keep losing to me? When I’m the one who’s out of practice? Come on. What’s gotten into you?”

Seulgi put her sword away and sighed. “You know what, I’m just going to say it.”

“Yes, please explain yourself.”

Quickly, Seulgi made a saccade across the courtyard to make sure that the Queen’s maids and the other servants in the household were not within earshot. Only then did she take a deep breath and announce, “the Queen and I...we...we sort of...you know...kissed.”

“What?! Oh, my goodness!” Moonbyul exclaimed. “Finally! It’s been painful, you know, watching the tension accumulate between the two of you.”

“Not so loud,” Seulgi hissed. “I don’t want anyone else to know.”

“Aye, aye, Captain.” Moonbyul giggled. “Wow, this is the best news I’ve heard in a while. I’m so pleased! Hey, how come you don’t look pleased? Was she not a good kisser?”

“It’s not about that!” Seulgi clarified. “I’m just...kind of apprehensive about it. It’s not that she made me uncomfortable; it’s just that...I’m not sure what this is supposed to mean.”

“What it’s supposed to mean?” Moonbyul snorted. “It means you two like each other. What else do you think it’s supposed to mean?”

“I don’t know how I’m supposed to process it or what I’m supposed to do about it. Never in my life had I ever expected to have kissed the Queen, out of all the people in the world,” Seulgi admitted. “Also, yes, we shared a kiss, but so what? What can I expect will result from it? Why in the world would I expect any sort of romantic relationship or commitment to form between a royal and a guard? All I know is that the last time it happened, both of them died, so I don’t want to follow in their footsteps.”

“Well, that’s because they had a baby out of wedlock,” Moonbyul pointed out. “That’s not gonna happen to you and the Queen.”

“Whatever,” Seulgi uttered. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Oh, really?” Moonbyul raised her eyebrows. “Maybe you want to be rational. Maybe you want to think that way. But is your heart just going to settle for that?”

“It won’t lead to anything more, so why should it matter?”

Moonbyul sighed. “Oh, man. You’re stubborn.”

“I’m just telling the truth,” said Seulgi under her breath.

“Well, I don’t want to argue with you, so let me just tell you this: don’t fixate on what you think will or won’t result from it. You’re probably better off thinking about what led up to it,” Moonbyul suggested. “I’m talking about your feelings for each other. I guess I should be glad that at least you’re not denying it.”

“And what would be the point? It happened once, and it was great, but it’s not gonna happen again,” she insisted, even though deep down she wanted it to happen again. She did not even want to admit it to herself, let alone admit it to her friend who, usually, proved to be right in the end.

“We’ll see about that,” replied Moonbyul.

They paused in their discussion when one of the Queen’s attending eunuchs came up to them.

“Captain Kang,” he said. “Master Kang is right outside, asking to see you.”

“He’s probably here to talk to me about the security around the harem,” Seulgi explained to Moonbyul. “I’ll be right back.”

Moonbyul nodded as Seulgi and the eunuch exited the courtyard. Turning around, she noticed that the Queen had finally risen from bed and was having her breakfast. Spiritedly, Moonbyul went up to Joohyun and bowed.

“Good morning, Your Majesty,” she said with mirth. “Did you sleep well?”

“Not bad. I just kind of regret having stayed up late,” replied Joohyun with a shrug. “You seem to be in a good mood.”

“Of course. My friend and my other friend kissed. I’ve been rooting for them all along, so it’s nice to see this development. It’s very wholesome,” Moonbyul commented gleefully.

Joohyun rolled her eyes, but lightheartedly. “I should’ve seen this coming. You two have always been close.”

“Correct, Your Majesty. No secrets between me and Seulgi.”

“Well then, I assume that’s what you two were discussing just now?”

Moonbyul nodded. “So I’ve been meaning to ask, what kind of a relationship does Your Majesty want with Seulgi?”

Joohyun hesitated for a moment. “You’re just going to tell her everything that I tell you here and now, right?”

“Well, I’m sure it’s nothing you weren’t already planning on telling her anyway,” she said with a wink.

“Fine. Just don’t tell her right away because I want to find a suitable time to tell her myself.”

“Alright!”

“What I think is that...I don’t particularly need any sort of formal relationship with her. It doesn’t need to be something that’s properly recognized by the law. I don’t need to have an official consort. I’m fine as long as Seulgi is around me. Unless she wants some sort of title bestowed upon her, apart from ‘Captain’, that denotes her personal association with me. She doesn’t seem like the type to go for that, though, does she?”

“So you know what you’re not looking for. But what is it that you are looking for?”

“I’ve never thought about it…” she admitted. “I didn’t think too much. I just went in for the kiss.”

“I guess it’s understandable that you’d be too smitten with her to deliberate upon it. But maybe you should start thinking about it,” Moonbyul suggested. “This sort of undefined relationship and the uncertainties that come with it could make Seulgi feel apprehensive or uneasy.”

“And you’re telling me this because she wanted you to convey this message to me?”

“No, not really,” she answered. “It’s just that I want the best for both of you.”

Joohyun smiled. “Compared to all the men who call themselves my advisors, you seem to be much more capable of providing sound advice to me.”

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Comments

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dtaylorz
#1
Chapter 14: Ow, what happened with the actress? :o
Jensoo4everlove #2
Chapter 30: Please update Author!!! This is so well written , please don't leave it incomplete😭
Oct_13_wen_03 57 streak #3
update please author nim 🥺🥺
Oct_13_wen_03 57 streak #4
update please author nim🥺🥺🥺🥺
Oct_13_wen_03 57 streak #5
update please author nim 🥺
lalalalisa13 #6
Chapter 1: awesome story! hope to read more soon🥰
Xa1jie11 #7
Chapter 30: Always hwaiting otornim. 👏
hotdog007 #8
heheheh still here authornim 😌😌 waiting with respect pi😎
LassKicker03
#9
Chapter 30: i have a horrible feeling that something bad is going to happen between joohyun and jooyoung. jooyoung's mother is deviously smart in that aspect but i just hope that jooyoung doesn't turn on his sister. thanks authornim for another great chapter
hotdog007 #10
still waiting pi, hope you are doing alright authornim🤩🤩