| CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE |

Right or Wrong

Baekhyun stared at the handle of the car door as if his life depended on it. He was really going to do this today. His heart plummeted into a mixture of dreadful memories and anger—all over again, like they happened yesterday. All this time, he thought he was ready. He never thought his courage would decay this fast. The numbness that was beginning to form in his whole body was replaced by warmth once again when he felt Jiwon’s hand on his lap. He turned to give her a light smile. “Baekhyun, just know that I’m not forcing you to do this. We can leave if you don’t want—” He put his hand on top of hers and shook his head to stop her from finishing that sentence.

“I can do this.” He sighed weakly. “I need to introduce my future wife to the old lifeless hag, eventually.”

His funny sarcasm didn’t quite work as Jiwon remained frowning. His expression fell once more as he tightens his grip on the door handle, bracing himself to open it. “Okay then, whatever you say.” Jiwon sighed before reaching for the pot of flowers they got.

As soon as Baekhyun’s feet met the brittle and cold grass, he shivered. It could be the fall-almost-winter breeze or it could be her—the negative sensation she still manages to feed into his brain up to this day. Jiwon walked around the car, towards him, and held his hand. “Let’s go?” She gestured him to lead the way. With heavy footsteps, Baekhyun began walking while pulling his fiancée along. As soon as they arrived in front of the tomb stone, Jiwon gasped. “Oh right … it was your birthday.” She recalled as she read the dates written on the stone.

Baekhyun felt the painful lump starting to form in his throat as he fought the urge to look away. He remained silent while staring down at it. He could barely move as if some kind of energy was stopping him from doing so. He had never felt so fragile in a very long time. Jiwon then let go of his hand and bent down to pay her respect before placing the pot of flowers beside the stone. “Your dad told me you’ve only been here a total of two times. First time was the funeral and the second time was your graduation when you were brought here by your family force—I heard that didn’t go well at all.” She turned her head to look up at his frozen and dead expression.

Jiwon couldn’t believe how fragile he suddenly looked. She stood up to level his face again and held his hand tight. “It hurts to see you like this. We can just go. We paid our respect and that’s enou—”

“Eomma.” Baekhyun spoke, his sparkling eyes never leaving the tomb stone. Jiwon felt the pain through his voice, hearing him call her properly like that for the first time felt unreal. “Eomma you see, I’m not as worthless as you always made me think back then. I have two wonderful kids now and I have the perfect woman in my arms, ready to be my wife. They love me and they think I’m pretty ing cool—so bite me!” He suddenly grunted loudly, echoing across the open field. Jiwon’s eyes widen in panic while looing around to check if there was anyone else hearing him. She then gasped when Baekhyun did a light kick right on the stone. “Hey—Baekhyun, calm down. Jesus Christ.” She pulled him away in panic.

Instead of listening to her, Baekhyun only made things worse by flipping his middle fingers right in front of the tomb stone. “ you, eomma. Rot in hell, you chose that. You made me an but goddamn it, I never thought being a good man is actually way cooler—you evil son of a witch—Appa’s happy and getting laid now by his MILF nurse so it! I wish you could die twice so you—” Jiwon had enough and covered his mouth, although he continued to muffle incoherent words right against her palm. “Yah, shut the hell up. Oh my god, I thought we were going to do this properly? Byun Baekhyun, calm the down or I will drag your back in the car and we’ll never come back here again.” She hissed with authority.

Baekhyun pushed her hand away while panting hard, catching his breath heavily after that influx of meaningful talk with his mother. “Oh my god, that felt awesome. Can I do that again?” He palmed his chest and looked at Jiwon with a growing smile.

“MILF nurse? Seriously?” Jiwon asked back instead, finally making him fully laugh in victory. “Wow, I feel so good. I love you so ing much.” He pulled her into a tight hug, ignoring her question. “I’ve released all my anger out and now it feels much easier to forgive her.” Cutting the hug short, Baekhyun kept one arm on her shoulders as he made the two of them face the tomb stone again. “You see eomma, you were not a good mother to me, nor were you a good wife to Appa but … I know that you had a tough life before you even had us. You were only human and as sad as it sounds, I know you only vented all your trauma and anger at us.” Baekhyun sighed as he read out her name in his head, causing a small smile to form on his lips. “Not saying it was right not was it a good enough excuse but … I realized I did that to women too—unfortunately, I ended up being so similar to the woman I hated the most. That makes me … technically hate myself too, right?”

Jiwon stared at him as he talked, even rubbed his back for comfort. She felt proud, she felt relieved to finally see this side of him for the first time. He was letting go, finally. He was healing. He was accepting life the way it was and is.

For the first time, she saw a genuinely confident Byun Baekhyun.

Baekhyun chuckled. “I don’t want to hate myself anymore, eomma.” He looked down to Jiwon, pressing his fingers on her shoulder. “I have my own family to love and take care of. I want to love them the right way so … I am forgiving you and I.” He looked down to his mother again. “Wherever you are—I don’t know where and I don’t want to go into detail of my own opinions about afterlife because Kim Jiwon here might have a different opinion and we might end up in a never-ending debate so let’s just say you’re somewhere or nowhere, just know that I am finally happy and I am doing okay.” Jiwon rolled her eyes but couldn’t help but to laugh. She then wrapped her arms around his waist and kissed his cheek. “Are you ready to go or want to stay longer