Heads up! Messy chapter... again but the next update will follow afted a few days :)

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Seulgi thought everything was going fine. She was sure she made the right decision to ask Eunae to be her girlfriend and albeit the confusion and the reason why she did so, she knew it was for the best... for the better of everyone including herself- her mental state of mind... and probably her heart.

She was also hopeful for her parents to comeback with great news, probably with the contract they wanted for so long with a company they've been trying so hard to get and beaming faces even with tired eyes and jetlagged bodies.

The dance practice was going so well, too. She haven't danced yet infront of Irene, which she'd told the older to nevermind her plan with Mrs. Lee and for Irene to just focus on what she's being taught. She didn't know when she'll show her another side of her that no one else knows but it was going according to plan and she'll just cross the bridge when she gets there. But until she's far and safe from the dance performance, she'll put it in the back of her mind.

Her life seemed to be taking a turn for the better. But Seulgi's life never been this good and she was skeptical with everything. Once things turn out in her favor, she'll find herself spiraling down the drain the next moment she blinks. So there was this nagging feeling that it was just too good to be true.

The moment she was slapped by the harsh reality was when she opened the door excitedly; her smile was ready and arms opened to welcome them home with her smile being returned or she'll find them all crying out of joy... was far from what she saw once she saw the crestfallen expression, tired and weary eyes. But what broke her heart most was the smile her parents were sporting. It was forced... their bottom lips were shaking and they were trying so hard not to cry infront of her and weep for failing.

All three of them stood without moving. Mr. and Mrs. Kang have the smile that shows they're keeping it all together but they're barely holding on and Seulgi with her forced grin, yet her eyes shine with unshed tears.

Right then and there Seulgi knew that it didn't go well... that whatever her parents wanted her to do should push through and Seulgi had no other choice but to comply.

"Seul, where are you?"

The voice from the speaker of her phone asked. The device was pressed on her ear and the warmth permeated in the half of the side of her face which was a total contrast of the other side which was almost too numb because of the cold.

If she was on her right mind, Seulgi would've transferred the phone to her other ear since the device was becoming excessively hot and it bothered her but the thing was... she wasn't. She just held it near and didn't speak, nor ended the call.

"Hey," she heard again. "Where are you? We couldn't reach you and now you're not answering me..."

The voice felt too far and too muffled to understand but she knew whose it was, she knew but her mind wasn't processing things properly that all she could do was to close her eyes and take a deep breath and continue walking.

"Bear..."

"I'm okay." She finally mumbled under her breath. "I'm okay... I just- I just need time, okay?"

Time wasn't the only thing she needed but the other person doesn't need to know about it.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. I'm safe. I'll text you soon, yeah?"

Safe... but not okay. Safe... but for how long?

The line went quiet for a moment but Seulgi's mind was again not on the call or the person who's calling her but on the bright glow of the neon sign outside the familiar establishment.

Nothing changed much. It was still the same as the last time she went there. There were people going in and out while holding a lighted stick or a half empty bottle of beer and some were swaying while trying not to trip on their feet. There was also the thrill inside her heart upon feeling the familiar thrum of the beats that's reverberating from the inside of the bar.

"Seulgi?" 

"Yes?"

She heard her sigh. "Be okay. Please."

"I will. Don't worry too much, Jo Eun Ae. Bye."

She pressed her phone to end the call and pocketed the device. Seulgi rubbed the side of her face which was warm and raked her hair using her hand. Breathing through , she saw a mist emerge from it and her eyes then travelled to the line outside the bar. 

She started walking towards the end of the line and stood to wait for her turn. But the coldness of the night was starting to become unbearable that she was having second thoughts about proceeding to drown in the music or maybe some alcohol (she's a lightweight but the troubles she was shouldering at the moment wasn't so she needed all the help she could to lessen the burden even just for a moment.)

It was too cold and her nose was starting to get red while her hands were deeply shoved inside her gray hoodie trying to keep it from being frozen when an arm yanked her away from the line and started to drag her towards the entrance.

Too taken aback, it took her awhile to protest but when she did, she tugged her hand but to no avail. 

"H-Hey!" She started to protest at the person but the words died on her tongue when she saw the familiar black hair and red lips.

"Why are you waiting there?" Sunmi hissed without looking back.

Seulgi was beyond baffled. Why was she being dragged? Why were they skipping the line?

"B-Because I wanted to go in?"

Sunmi only chuckled at the obvious answer. When they reached the entrance, the bouncer only gave way to them which made some patrons that were still in line groan and protest. However, a piercing glance from Sunmi shut them up.

Man, she whistled in her head. This girl was still as fierce as ever.

Tugging the hand on her arm, she tried to remove the grasp but Sunmi was taller, leaner and stronger than her, leaving her no choice but to stop her struggle and let herself be dragged away.

They didn't have to look for a table for long because there was an empty one near the bar aisle (which was weird because everyone seemed to be looking for one but that table remained unoccupied but Seulgi brushed it off since she only came here to spend time and drown in the strong beats blasting from the speakers and not worry about anything else).

Finally, her arm was released and Sunmi blew hot air on her hands which were trembling from the cold. Seulgi's own were still tucked inside her hoodie, safe and slightly warm.

"Gods, Seulgi. Why did you have to wait there in that freezing cold weather?!" Sunmi scolded her, making her slightly jump from her seat.

"Shouldn't I have? Isn't that how you're supposed to get in?" She asked unsure.

The older only shook her head and sighed. "Look," she started. "You're allowed to go in and out whenever you please. I mean whenever. Okay? Understand? Get it?"

"Why?"

Sunmi's dark eyes gleamed in the strobe lights passing by them and a smile was on her lips when she simply said, "Because."

"Why?" Seulgi repeated. 

She wasn't sure if Sunmi was only kidding her. Because how can she do that when she doesn't even have that privilege? And who was Sunmi to say that to Seulgi?

"Gods, stop asking questions. I haven't seen you for a long time so drinks on me. Be right back though. I need one on my own."

She stared until Sunmi's form disappeared in the crowd and she felt herself slump on the table. Seulgi closed her eyes for a moment and concentrated on the music that seemed to drown away all her thoughts.

The song was New York by The Chainsmokers and she started to calm down just a little bit. It was the right choice to go here, she thought. The music calmed her heart and cleared her thoughts and she could feel her sanity being reeled back in with the help of the ambiance of the place and the vibrations in her body from the rhythm of the song.

Before deciding to come here, her body was like floating in a place she couldn't reach and her mind was so disconnected with everything around her that she couldn't tell which was which anymore.

Even the voice of Eunae seemed distorted and her heart felt like lead when she answered the call, remembering that Eunae was her girlfriend and she deserves to know her state.

Her steps felt light and heavy at the same time while she walked. Seulgi, despite being so out of it, knew that driving wasn't a good idea so even when the place was a little far from their home, she decided it was better to travel on foot.

The air and the time spent walking alone could even give her the clarity and solace she was looking for.

A clink of glass on glass brought her back and she raised her head to see Sunmi holding two glasses. She slid the fancy glass jar towards Seulgi and drank on the other. "One for me and one for you." 

Seulgi raised her brow and shook her head, pushing the drink back towards Sunmi. "I don't plan to drink tonight. Or maybe not yet, atleast."

"Oh, sad." Sunmi looked anything but. She was even smiling devilishly when she pushed the glass back. "But they say that you shouldn't refuse a free drink from a friend."

"A friend?"

"Uh huh." Sunmi flashed her another smile before glancing near the bar. With her red lips, she pointed at the woman who was talking to the bartender rather... closely. "Your friend gave me that drink, saying that it's non alcoholic so feel free to enjoy, I guess."

Squinting her eyes at the friend Sunmi mentioned, she tried to figure out who the person was but the smoke and the strobe lights hindered her vision which didn't help her poor eyesight.. All she could make out was a gray hoodie like her own and black hair.

"Who?" She asked Sunmi when she couldn't figure who it was. It was just making her head and eyes hurt.

Sunmi drank from her glass again before she answered. "The one who you thought was the devil incarnate."

The devil.

"Irene?" Dubious, she looked at the girl again who was still talking to the barten