Title: Perfect

Au: N/A

Tags: fluff, angst

TW: DepresSHON

Prompt: Seungwan wants to come back home.

Wordcount: 1449

Seungwan has always been too kind for her own good.

Saying yes even when she didn't want to, doing someone a favor even if there was nothing for her to gain from it- the list goes on. This is why despite all the hate that Wendy gets from her previous actions from international fans, Red Velvet treasures her dearly and can proudly state that Wendy is the entire backbone of the group. The one who makes them smile, laugh, and overall get through the day.

So imagine the members' anger when they not only found out what happened to her, but the people behind it's response as well? They weren't angry, they were furious. Even then, despite being the one lying on a hospital bed for months, not being able to even chew properly and being so injured resulting in her parents flying from across the world- Wendy remains what she's always been. An angel. Even though she was the person done wrong she was the one who tried to calm everyone down; the one who showed everyone a smile, a laugh, and the one who gave everyone hope that everything will be okay- that everything will go back to the way it was. 

But even perfect Wendy has her tired days. The days when the happy pill herself can't be happy. Watching the other members perform together on stage as four without her made her heart break. There was a spot right there. It was left open for her. But she can't. She can't perform with the people she treasures most as she stares again and again in awe at the massive family they've built over the years. Not being able to stand on stage was taking a toll on her- and it was pretty evident. Who wouldn't start to go crazy? She loved nothing more than to sing; she was Wendy. Red Velvet's Wendy who sings.

She witnesses it all unfold before her eyes. The way Irene exuded the perfect aura, the way Seulgi performed the perfect movements, the way Joy conveyed the perfect expressions, and  the way Yeri managed to tie everything together so perfectly- it made Wendy's heart pound. And that's how she recognized just how perfect the performance was. She felt the same adrenaline she feels everytime they go on stage just by watching a video; That's how amazing the performance was. Wendy clutches the sheet that covered half her body, biting her lower lip as the performance concluded; the only thing heard was the cheering of the pumped audience and the ticking of the clock. The tick-tock once again reminding her how much time she's wasting not going back home.

But at this point, does she even want to go home? They're perfect. Nothing is beyond that- there's no such thing as 'even more perfect'. If she had come back, would it tilt the scale and make everything lose balance? Would it make everything imperfect?  Wendy's trembling hands rise to her face, strands of her hair falling from each side of her petite head as she tried to cover her emotions to no one. She was panicking. Wendy, who's supposed to be the backbone of the group, the happy pill, is too kind for her own good. 

Whenever Wendy feels like her chest is too tight, like she needs to release it somehow, she does what she loves most.

She sings.

There was no beat, no tempo, no piano or backtracks, but Wendy heard it all. She heard it in her head and in her heart.

"I'm in my bed..." She starts, biting back her own sobs. The thoughts of her role in the group clouding her head as she let out each word of a song she connected to in so many levels. Singing was her oasis, anxiety being her unknown limbo. And she was hopelessly stuck in the middle, with no hand to guide her. Or atleast, no hand that she saw. Unbeknowst to her, the door slowly opened, the person opening it thinking that she was asleep due to all the lights outside being off. The intruder stood there, watching the girl's bandaged face contort to every emotion but one with a smile on her face. Her grip on the doorknob somehow tightening at the sight of how the blonde's eyes watered and seing her refusal to let them fall.

Wendy was a hypocrite. Lovingly stating how Red Velvet has Reveluv's backs but she turned her own to herself. 

"What am I now? What if I'm someone I don't want around?" The older girl narrows her eyes, gulping down the lump in as she silently made her way to Wendy- who didn't seem to notice her still. "I'm falling again, I'm falling again, I'm falling..." Just then, a choked sob makes it out of Wendy's throat- her emotions finally exploding out. The older girl hugs her the instant it happened, burrying Wendy's face against her chest. Wendy stops, her small hands encircling their way around her unnie's back.

"U- Unnie..."

"Shh..." Irene hushes, rubbing her back. "You know, I've always been proud of you."

Wendy's hands clutches the back of her unnie's shirt. The blonde opens to say something, but Irene hushes her again, the finality and 'let me finish' imminent in her voice.

"You're one of the most amazing, talented, and bravest women I know. I could say every compliment in the dictionary and it'd still won't do you justice. It's because you're beyond words, Wan. You're already so amazing, so different- yet perfect. I just..." Irene stammers, not realizing how worked up she'd gotten when she'd started her speech.

"It's just that..." She sighs, trying to take a deep breath as Wendy pulls away a bit, looking at her with those innocent, vulnerable eyes.

"I wish you'd finally see yourself the way I see you."

Wendy tries not to choke on her tears, a sob escaping her trembling lips.

Wendy rests her face against Irene's chest, finally letting all the build up pressure out. She detests crying; especially infront of her members- but it'd gotten too much.

"I.. I just want to.." Irene hums, a small smile now on her face as a few streaks of teas run down her face. "Yes? What is it, Wan?"

"I just want to come back home." Wendy bawls, her tears drenching Irene's shirt as she uncontrollably trembled in her arms. Irene's shirt was soft, cuddly, and she smelled of lavender. Her warmth had granted her more comfort than she'd thought, leaving her to cling onto their leader tighter.

"I know." Irene simply replied, trying to soothe Wendy's intense shivering. "I know." she repeats.

After a few minutes, Wendy finally pulls away from Irene, a huge bright grin on her face as a light blush plasters itself on her face. Her chest felt much lighter, like she could take on anything after she had just finally dumped the pressure she'd been keeping inside- she was ready to be Wendy again; albeit a little different. 

"Are you okay?" Irene mumbles as she leans her face against Wendy's hair, inhaling the other's hair conditioner. Wendy hums, closing her eyes for a few moments cherishing the other's presence. 

"I'm okay." 

Irene feels a certain relief, finally backing back with her hands still on the sides of her arms. Just on cue, the door is opened without permission and there three heads immerged with silly grins on their faces.

"Joohyun unnie, Seungwan unnie, we brought fruits from the store. You guys digging in or not?" Yeri whines, stomping her foot in impatience. Irene chuckles, standing up as Joy bickers with Yeri about who gets the biggest apple with Seulgi joining in on the debate. 

Irene glances at Wendy, offering her hand to Wendy. "You ready to come back home?"

Wendy's eyes disappears, turning into the familliar sparkling crescents Irene loved all too much. 

"Yeah. Yeah, I am." Wendy takes her unnie's hand, standing up and walking to the door. She glances back to her bed, a chuckle escaping her lips. 

Somehow, she imagined their fans there, eyes bright as they wait for her. 

Right now, Wendy might not be able to go to her true home, but she has them. 

Wendy enters the living room seeing the annoyed faces of the trio with Irene laughing at them.

They weren't perfect, but then again, so was she. They had eachother. Against the world, she had them.

In a world filled with cruelness and evil, Wendy has them.

Wendy has Red Velvet.

Wendy has a home.