※※※※※

Could sorry do it? Could it fix all the things that she had tried dismissing, not feeling the past four years?

This thing, apologies and all, Namjoo just didn’t know. Her mind felt like a ball of yarn too tightly woven together. She couldn’t sort out her thoughts, her feelings, anything.

She was happy, sad, angry all together. Sehun coming home could fix everything, but she didn’t want his presence filling all the holes in her life. It was just complicated like that. Not anything that had to do with a woman or a man. That kind of complicated of tugging and pulling.

It was not like that.

Truly, she wanted to punch his guts. For leaving the day after her birthday and going missing, leaving her waiting. Call he’d promised, but never did. He promised first. But Namjoo could not just thrash him around.

She saw Seulbi first. Being raised by a single father. She felt for Seulbi. At such a young age, how many more things would she have to witness her father go through before she grew up and took hold of the reins of her own life? Too much like the she’d witnessed from her parents. An angry mother. A useless father.

Seulbi like she would have to fill in half the shoes because Sehun would have to work twice as hard when she started growing taller, needing more. And then, would Seulbi have a best friend to sit with under the moonlight; cheer her up?

Namjoo tried not to soften too much when the smell of meat began permeating the kitchen. She had surrendered to a chair at the table. Sehun had dropped off a cool glass of water in front of her, as if quietly saying, sit child while I prepare your dinner.

Namjoo turned the cup round and round and round. Glancing over her shoulder where the voices of some animated cartoon burst out of the tablet Seulbi was glued to. Kids these days and their technologies. Must make life easier for Sehun while he focused on his father duties. The way she often sat in the tiny living room watching television while her father went missing and her mother prepared dinner in the kitchen. Namjoo had always been cautious not to bother her, especially after a long day of work.

Her mother had worked at a match factory. Boxing those tiresome things, standing twelve hours a day on her feet. Then coming home to tend to her and her man child who was never home to help rear their daughter. Instead of dropping dead in the middle of the night her mother screamed at her father, arguing about money, the house, their kid. How nothing gets done around here! In the coming morning, she’d go back to that factory standing twelve hours and repeat.

It was a miracle she had withstood a ty marriage for fourteen miserable years. And then vanished to nowhere.

The only woman Namjoo wanted to make it up to for bearing an awful life. The only friend she had had.

All gone.

There had been no Sehun to lean on. The only person who understood the true depths of her difficulties had not been able to lend an ear, his dumb shoulder, extend an arm around her, or tell her cheesy jokes. She had been left with a useless father incapable of fending for himself. Like a stork had just dropped him on her doorstep. Here, he’s yours now. He couldn’t manage his bills, his bank savings, the food in his fridge, clean the house, do his laundry, wash a dish. Namjoo had had to pick up where her mother left off.

No one knew she had wanted to run away, too. Out of this town. From everything dropped on her. The many times she screamed by herself in the darkness of the night, howling like some wolf at the moon on the seashore.

In the end, she just couldn’t.

Instead she chose to run down a cheap route where she could temporarily forget all for a while. And it worked. On those nights she could feel like she was just a woman living a simple life. The responsibility of her father? Nada. She was just a woman living by herself, enjoying random dates, and going to his place to finish the night. Good stuff.

“I hope your palate is still the same.” Sehun stirred something at the stove. “Or do you take less spice now?”

He peered at her with a playful smile over his shoulder.

“I’m not going to eat much. I’m going out with my roommate later.” Swiping her cup, she sipped on the water.

“Chaeri?” Sehun asked. “The girl with the,” he made a show of drawing invisible s over his chest. Namjoo shot him a warning glare. Grinning, he said, “She’s still here?” Attention back on the stove he laughed quietly to himself. “I thought she would have left town. Why? Does she have a boyfriend here?”

“That’s none of your business.” Namjoo scolded.

“Why not? I’m back.” Sehun pointedly reminded. Glancing at her, he asked, “Does she know I’m back?”

“No.” Namjoo flatly answered.

“Then, let’s all meet up sometime.” Sehun suggested. “You, me, and Chaeri. It’ll be like old times and I’ll bring Seulbi. She hasn’t been around much. I want to show her the town. We could even go to our favorite restaurant.”

Namjoo just looked at him. Not saying.

“Deal?” With a click he shut off the stove. The plates on the dishrack rattled as he tugged one out and scooped the steaming beef on it. Setting it in front of her, he said, “Have a taste. I’m a better cook now.”

He waited. Pressuring her. Giving up, Namjoo lifted the spoon and tasted the well seasoned food.

She just gave a nod of the head. Gladly smiling, he called out, “Seulbi, come eat. Put down your tablet.”

Tottering over obediently, Seulbi curiously stared at her as she approached and climbed onto a nearby chair. Sehun plated her food onto a plastic shatter-free plate with Princess Fiona imprinted on it. He poured water for her in a smaller cup. Peering at Seulbi gladly, Sehun finally sat down next to his daughter.

“Eat slowly, ok?” Sehun her hair.

And Namjoo could tell that unlike her father had been toward her, Sehun really loved his daughter with his entire heart. Seulbi deserved it. Seulbi his daughter.

It was a strangely comforting thought. Seulbi being showered with affection and hearts. She wouldn’t have to witness her father toiling miserably like she had watched her mother every day. Her haggard face, rough calloused hands. So tired she couldn’t even lift her arms up to push back the loose strands falling out of her low ponytail. The exhaustive years had wrinkled her beautiful face with too many lines, every etch their own heart sinking story to tell.

But Seulbi would not have that.

Seulbi would have better.

Namjoo dug into her food furiously. Coughing when the food went down the wrong tube. Sliding her chair back, she thumped a fist against her chest. “Excuse me.” She scurried down the only corridor searching for the bathroom.

Slamming the door, she heaved over the toilet. Coughing, spitting. But the food had settled, a hard, thick block in slowly traveling down. Rubbing her chest to outwait the weighty sensation Namjoo sat down at the edge of the bathtub.

She didn’t want to think. Past was the past, wasn’t it? But the effort was ineffective. Seeing Seulbi made her think about her youth. Seeing Sehun made her miss her mother who had left her in the time he was gone.

Their lives were polar ends and it stung her. This wasn’t any better than when she learned the third year of waiting Sehun wasn’t coming. And she had accepted that.

Her friend had moved on. Settled somewhere and forgot about her. She was just some girl he had grown up with. End of their tale.

But Sehun was finally here and Namjoo could not be happy. She just wanted to blame him for everything. Tell him he had wasted her time. And now she was thirty and she didn’t even want to get married anymore. She didn’t ever want to be with anyone.

A knock on the door and Sehun worried, “Hey, are you ok?”

Rubbing her face, Namjoo stood. She could breathe now that the block in was gone. Unlocking the door, she said, “I’m fine. Just felt a little sick.”

Sehun observed her disbelieving. “The food was bad, huh?”

“What?”

“My cooking. You still think it’s junk.”

Namjoo scoffed. When she turned forward Sehun was grinning warmly. The halfway smile marking her lips crawled back down. Now that they were upfront, she could see him closely. Faint lines edged around his eyes. His jawline was still knife sharp. The mischief in the curve of his lips still present. In a split second they could turn coy as he spat some cheeky pun.

Sehun’s eyes that held so many promises; the glint of a sun rising over the horizon, the soft of a friend sitting at her side, a gaze that only saw her. There, she saw the depth of herself; his best friend, the girl from across the street, one person different from everyone else in his life.

A tale of a tale and many more tales.

Long ago…

Oh Sehun was still the eye-catcher who always made the low of her days fresh and brighter. That, too, was just a story long past.

Kim Namjoo was just her own person now.

She pushed past him. “I can leave after I finish my plate?”

※※※※※

Some feeling pierced him the moment Namjoo edged past. Like he was some disappointment. Like he was a stain she couldn’t scrub out of her floorboard.

Seulbi was waiting for him when he returned. Watching him slide back into his chair and pick up his spoon. He smiled to assure her everything was ok. She beamed a happy smile and kicked her legs under the table, sticking a spoonful of food into . Across from him, Namjoo quietly picked at her plate. Not really eating. More stirring, staring at the meat he had cooked.

“Don’t force yourself.” He said.

Namjoo paused then shoveled a large spoonful into .

It couldn’t be the same after all. Namjoo was different. Namjoo was angry with him. But did you know, I needed to come back, he wanted to tell her. I had to. I missed home so much. I miss the feeling of being with you.

“I’m done.” Namjoo said. She pushed the chair back and stood before he was even ready for it.

“It’s fine.” He turned around to see her headed for the sink. “I’ll do the dishes. If you’re in a hurry, you can just go.”

Coming back his way, she snatched her purse off the counter. Namjoo hesitated after slipping into her shoes. Seeming to tense. When she turned around, she smiled very kindly. “Bye Seulbi. Be good to your dad. I’ll see you Monday.”

Seulbi stared at her with innocent round eyes.

“Say bye.” Sehun prompted.

“Bye bye Miss Namjoo.” Seulbi quietly squeaked.

The door opened then closed.

Why didn’t you call me he still wanted to ask.

Would Namjoo give him the time of day to ever find out?

“I done, daddy.” Seulbi said.

“Good job.” Sehun praised.

Giggling shortly, she grabbed her cup of water and held it to her lips. “Daddy?”

“Hmm?”

“Miss Namjoo fwend?” she innocently wondered.

“Yes,” he answered, “daddy grew up here with her.”

“What bout mommy?”

He shook his head. “She doesn’t live here.”

“Why we come here?” Seulbi stared at him bug-eyed. “For Miss Namjoo?”

Sehun stared back. He didn’t know what to say. His phone on the counter rang, but he didn’t go pick up. He already knew who was calling.

Haewon wanted to know where he was. Haewon would banshee scream, “Where the did you take my daughter?!”

Sehun would not talk to her. He did not want to talk to her. There was nothing anymore. His explanations had been done. She had slacked. She was irresponsible and he didn’t want to keep slamming the door anymore.

He missed home. He missed the peace. He missed the comfort of a friend.

Namjoo who was closest to him. She would be with him. She would stand with him and hold his hand to hold his fort.

He could rely on her strength. She had always been so strong.

He missed her the most. And he had thought about her every day.

Are you married now he wanted to write so many times. Hoping the answer was no. I’ll come for you.

Instead, he crumpled every letter up. Sometimes they went missing from his desk. And when confronted, Haewon threw a rage with him every time. Breaking a plate or two.

Seulbi didn’t understand these adult things. Sehun wanted to protect her. He wanted to give her a good life, and home was where she could have it. Surrounded by the good people he knew.

And Namjoo was the first person he thought of.

But it didn’t appear like she felt the same.

He had waited for her to come looking, like she always did. But she didn’t. And now he was here. For her.

“Daddy likey Miss Namjoo?” Seulbi probed.

He ruffled her hair with a grin.

※※※※※

“Seriously?” A familiar voice complained. Upon a blast of evening breeze, Chanyeol turned around from the bar counter he’d been leaning against. Grinning coyly when he recognized Namjoo and her roommate crossing the room toward a window table.

Through the window a firelit sky was brilliant against the backdrop of a sleepy city. But here, the noise was rampant. Men cheered when the baseball team scored through the three television sets hanging off the ceiling.

“Bacon and cheese fries, too.” Chanyeol added to his order when his glass of beer arrived. The bartender nodded with an irritated raise of the brows and stalked into the back. The crash of a finished beer bottle came from his side. Another bartender tossing a drink into the garbage beneath the counter before serving another to a different patron.

A mix of alcohol wafted through the air. Everyone on some high. Most cheery, glad for the weekend. Burning of the rest of the night with a relaxing drink. Meeting up with friends, finally. Enjoying some downtime, because Saturday meant hangovers could be slept through. The wives could take care of the children.

The dim glow of the lights set the calming atmosphere. A stage many welcomed. On the far side younger men were gathered around pool tables, trying to impress the ladies. But Chanyeol did not have to put that much effort into getting any attention. He already had his eye on someone.

“Thanks.” He winked at the bartender, slapped down two twenties, grabbed his drink, the bowl of fries, and whirled around marching toward the table he’d set his eye on. “Hey ladies,” he greeted setting down the snack. “Hungry?”

“Chanyeol!” Namjoo’s friend squealed in delight. Her eyes went all sparkly on him. She was a squeamish one. If only Namjoo was like that.

“Hey.” He greeted her. “Can I sit down?”

“Oh, of course!” She slid over making room for him. Cunningly sitting down he slyly smiled at Namjoo across from him. Her gaze was flat as ever. Unimpressed. As expected.

“Bad evening?” He chirped.

“Oh, long day. She wasn’t feeling well, so she left work early.” It was Chaeri.

“I have something that can help you.” He flirtatiously said hinting at what Namjoo knew best.

“Do you?” It was Chaeri again, eagerly leaning forward, peeking into his face.

He lay his eyes steadfast on Namjoo. Waiting.

“I have to go to the bathroom.” Namjoo excused. Sliding out of her bench she pushed through the packed room, edging toward the back. Chanyeol stared after her.

“So, Chanyeol…” Chaeri started.

“I forgot. I should go pick up my other drink.” He slid his beer toward her. “This is for you.”

“That’s so sweet of you!” She beamed giddily.

Getting to his feet he also shoved his way through the crowd. He found the washrooms right away. Women’s next to the men’s. Hovering around patiently and then through the door he heard the sound of an air dryer humming. As the door opened, Namjoo halted and stared up at him.

“Finished?” he asked. “Come on.”

“What are you up to?” Namjoo demanded when he snatched her hand and dragged her toward the exit.

“Let’s go on a walk.” He told, smiling mischievously.

The starry sky burst overhead as he pushed the glassy exit open. Orange sparked at the end of a cigarette nearest a boarded fence, the smell blanching the air. Several males were sharing a hushed conversation, never minding the couple leaving the bar. Already assuming where that man and that woman were going.

“Chanyeol,” Namjoo sharply warned, tugging on her hand, but he held on tight.

“A walk, I said.” He pulled her closer, nearly tucking her hand into his jeans pocket. Namjoo nearly leapt a step bumping into his arm.

She peered around the empty streets filled with glowing lights. “We’re outside. Let go.”

“Oh?” he asked. “So, I can only touch you when you’re in my apartment?”

Namjoo scowled.

“No one’s around. Why do you care?” Chanyeol mused.

“Then you can let go.”

Leaning down he breathed into her ear, “I don’t want to.”

Her stare was menacing, but it was enamoring. Namjoo always putting on a fierce front when in fact she was just the girl next door who loved children. She was the first one who came back for him after their first night together. Now he didn’t want to let her go. Clothed or not, he liked her either way.

Namjoo tried squeezing her hand out of his again. “I’m not going to your place tonight.”

“We’re going on a walk I said,” he repeated then gentler this time, “we’re just walking.”

Namjoo frowned up at him. He lessened the strength of his hold testing, hoping she wouldn’t pull away.

She didn’t and he was happy.

***uh-oh, there is something Sehun hasn't told anyone

***and Chanyeol :))))))

***I shed a weird tear this chapter xDDD