Yerin P.O.V. 

A robot voice interrupted the silence through the invisible and digital wall’s speakers: 

« Choi Yuna Game over. » 

Again this was only a lie to cover the reality: it wasn’t game over but life over. Another one leaving our cruel World.  Another innocent young person who didn’t deserve her fate. 

This was the world we were living in. Yet, there could have been other way than sacrificing 40% of the youth through a deathly survival game. I hate that word: this is not a game. We are not toys … yet, that’s exactly how the powerful elders treat us. To the public eye, we are contributing to science and progress. In reality, we are a way of entertainment: the media broadcast what they call « a reality show » for the elders not to be bored at home. To the public eye, we are put in that big stadium to improve ourselves, learn and above all to reveal our true self.  In reality, there is no fair rules except the law of the strongest. Nothing honorable, no ethics, no values, … no humanity. 

The system goes like this: when a child reaches his seventeenth birthday - he has six month left before joining the Stadium. Then he has to survive in there until his eighteenth birthday. If he is lucky enough - no I mean strong enough - he will be part of the 60% who manage to make it through alive.

According to statistics, the Stadium process has enabled the reduction of the population growth in a « promising no satisfying way ».  Scientists and politicians are very proud of this achievement - again this is a quote from a study. Those are not my own words. 

Originally, I wasn’t supposed to take part in the Stadium process but I managed to convince its creator: my father.  Actually I couldn’t understand why after hearing only good things about it from him, I was forbidden from joining the process. Plus all my childhood friends and classmates were enrolling at that same time. I blackmailed him to call into question his great scientist career if he didn’t change his mind. He finally let me even though I was now eighteen years old. At that time, I admired him: I guess I had been brainwashed by all the studies praising him. I wondered if I had a heart at that time though: I mean the studies were clearly stating that the process could regulate the population. Why have I never wonder how? There is not many way of regulating a population … 

Sadly, that wasn’t the only terrifying fact I realized once I joined the Stadium process. It was like a zoo. We were treated as entertainers … To me, science cannot be mix with entertainment for the mere reason that life is not a joke.  Yet - and I don’t want to believe that this is entirely my father’s fault - the media took advantage of it. I guess it was again a win-win situation for both parties: scientists could have their funds and the media their TV rate. 

On top of the death rate, I was scared by the process outcome. I already have an idea of who was going to survive. Even though, I knew none of them - since I was one year older.  It is always the smarter ones but in a bad way. The kind of individual who stabs « friends » in their back. Those are often the same kind  of person who takes care of their body in a selfish way. They have muscle and a certain type of intelligence … but still their essence is bad. Mark my words:  I’ve witnessed several cases all resulting in an unfair death. I am not afraid to claim it: The Good Die Young. 

In that big stadium, there were buildings or should I rather say ruins. That was scary comparing to the city we grew up in. There was no technology. There was nothing to help us … We had to find our own way to survive as if everything in there was designed for us to fail. We have always had robots … now we have to use our own hands. If only that was the only difficulty … No in order to increase the death rate, they got the diabolical idea of putting diverse traps here in there. There are too many to describe them all. However, they all have in common to not destroy our body - which is ironically funny. Isn’t the purpose of getting rid of us? Why protect our body from harm? Indeed, they « only » kill us from inside since we become unconscious. Then a robot would appear to take away the lifeless body. I wonder what they do to it. Are parents even aware of what their children become? From what I know the Stadium process is recent, it is 10 years old. That’s still terrific now that I think about it: 10 years during which the youth or rather the Good Die Young.

I went back to reality once I realized I have been unmoved for too long. The place was desert, I even wonder if there are many players left  - yeah player that’s how we are called - since after all this is just a game for the elders. I looked up at the fake sky, they even chose the colors’s grey - the designers are not that cruel after all. It is ironic of course. I was surrounding by buildings. I felt sleepy so I was looking for a place where I would be able to close my eyes. You’re surely wondering why I don’t feel stress, why I have no fear. Well now you’ll know:

« Yerin, be careful there is a trap on your left. » - I heard my father’s worried voice in my hidden earphone. 

At first, I thought that every one had someone’s warning them of all traps. But then, how could people still die? Plus, only my father and a few other designers know the traps by heart. Unless they would provide a map with them all. Which would never happen since this is against the purpose of the process. Death is the purpose.

And again my father chose that I wasn’t part of it. That I wouldn’t contribute to it. In game words, this is called « cheating ». However, what can I do? I can disobey … Maybe the death of his only child would serve him a lesson? Maybe my death would enable the rescue of thousands of others. Don’t get me wrong I am not considering myself as a hero. Whatever my thoughts, my actions are still selfish since so far I have only saved myself. This may be my fourth days in the Stadium but I already knew too much. 

I walked towards the building in ruins on my right. Father said that it was a peaceful one. 

« Yerin you already know if you want to leave, you can. Do the gesture as I told you and I will show you the way out. »

I already heard that statement nth times. Yet, I didn’t want to be privileged - knowing the traps location was already enough - I wanted to witness everything through my eyes … all the cruelty, the unfairness, … Only then will I choose my faith. I am still wondering how the survivors can leave a peaceful life after that but I already have my answer: those who survive are the selfish ones - because this is required to survive in there. There is no use helping others. The faster people die the faster the game is over because that would mean reaching the 40% death rate faster. 

If I reckon well, so far five players « lost the game » - again this is an euphemism. Yet, this is only the fourth days. We have six months to hold on.

Two weeks passed and I think I understand now why the game has never lasted more than two months. A few days in there were already enough for me to think about giving up. I guess the same for others: some players even influence others towards traps so that it ends faster. I witness one player doing that to another. Tiredness and hunger trigger off the « perfect deadly combo »: careless so you fall into traps easily and emotionless inhumanity in other words you’re even willing to provoke the death of others. 

Now I wonder if all the weak people were already gone. Is there any good person still here? You’re surely wondering if I will do anything to make the situation change. Well I am kind of an antihero because I don’t act … my rebellion remains at the thoughts level.

Then I encountered someone … the first person I knew and surely the only one. In fact, that day I wanted to explore more since I knew that my father would protect me. Yet he kept saying « walk away ». I have been listening to him all this time. He kept me in area where he said that there was no danger. However now I just didn’t want to stay there because I knew that I would miss the whole experience. Yet, he was so persistent that I became curious and doubts started building up. Maybe was he hiding something else from me?

I arrived into a building and for the first I heard something else.  A crowd. 

That’s how I discovered a new place: this was a fighting arena. I arrived at the very moment where a player put the other one K.O. The crowd was screaming like some animals. From their face I could label them as those bad ones. It was their way to get rid of the good ones fast I guess. I am aware that there are good people who are strong and could put them K.O. too but often those good ones don’t fight and die because they’re selfless - so when trying to save another. 

« Game over! » « Game over! » - The crowd was screaming and now that I think about it even my dad screams got higher. 

« Leave Yerin! » - Yet, this was merely a game fight.  I didn’t understand his reaction …  until I saw the K.O. player state. He was unconscious but contrary to the trap's effect there were lots of bruises and blood. He was beaten to death. He then was put in a trap:  a hole in the wall. 

« Hey guess what there is a new one! » - I heard a female voice screamed. Suddenly a silence echoed as I lifted up my eyes … all eyes were on me. They didn’t even look human at this point. 

« Why not making her fight again someone of her league for once! Because those fights aren't long enough and I am sure we can arise her bad side. » - The same player added.

« Put her in the waiting cell! » - Another screamed suddenly. I guess I was so shocked that I couldn’t even recall what happen. I only know there was many screams among them those of my hopeless dad. And now I was thrown in a cold cell.

« Don’t worry you’ll win easily. Well only if you’re willing to fight in the first place. Tomorrow.» 

I was left alone after that. I couldn’t even hear my dad. I guess he gave up on me. Now I had to fight, I still don’t understand why they said that it will be easy. I won’t be against one of them - it doesn’t mean  that I would win easily. Plus, winning would only make me a bad one - that’s what they wanted too - yet, I have been impartial this time. I wasn’t good nor was I bad. Is it worth it to stay loyal?  

I then heard someone cough and realized that I wasn’t alone. Someone else was in the cell next to me. I could see her through the bars. She was sat again the cold wall - hugging her knees. Her face hidden against them. She looked so vulnerable. She was shaking too.

« Hello, do you want my jacket? » - I offered. Yet she silently shook her head weakly without lifting it. 

« Don’t be afraid you can look at me. » - She did but I could see fear in her eyes. Yet, I was frozen because I knew her. 

« Eunha? » - She suddenly looked terrified. « It is me Yerin … You used to visit us with your parent when were younger. Do you remember me? » 

She nodded shyly and a glittering infectious smile grew on my face. 

It has been a long time since I’ve last seen her. She really grew up into a beautiful girl. Well she always had been cute but there was something beyond that just indescribable. I can only tell that it warm my heart. She looked more comfortable now and she even had a small smile. How long was the last time I have seen a smile that genuine. Yet, I also saw how she was still shaking because of the cold. I got nearer the bars.

« Come here take it. » - I handed her my jacket. This time she listened. In the action, we accidentally touched each other hands. I froze at the contact … her skin may be cold but it was the warmer I have ever been in contact with. It was so soft. At that very moment, we both looked into each other eyes. 

That’s when I recall some flashback. 

The reason why she and her parents were often visiting my house. At that time, my dad told me to play with her while he was talking with her parents. That’s how, we spent many times together throughout the years. However once I recall having to ask my father a random thing. I approached his office and my curious self just couldn’t help but eavesdrop their conversation. 

« Your daughter is sick. She is very fragile. » - My father started talking.

« Are the test positive yes or no doctor? » - Eunha’s mother cut him. 

« Sadly she can’t be cured. » - He confessed. « However this doesn’t mean that she can’t be saved. So far, her body responds well as the illness has not been triggered. That’s why she is clearly gifted. Some would claim a miracle. Even my cartesian self would wan to agree since all my scientist career, I have never seen such wonder. Studying her case could bring so much to  science. »

An awkward silence before my father resumed: 

« Of course this is not the right time at all. You don’t have to worry about her. Your daughter is very strong. » 

In fact, she was. The proof was that she there  in the flesh in front of me seven years after. However something made me boil inside. Why was she here whereas her health was at risk? My father knew it … why did he allow her to be sent here! 

« Are you okay? » - Eunha’s soft voice brought me back to her. I guess I looked angry and I really was. She had worn my jacket. She was holding the bars in front of her with her hands. I looked into her eyes … she was worried. 

« Don’t worry I am gonna get you out of here. »

« I was not worried about myself … but about you. »

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