For You

Seesaw

For You by (G)I-dle

Yerin POV

I sit at the river late at night by myself. I've been here for hours now alone soaking in the night's peacefulness. Sinb has been with Yoohyeon a lot more recently. I try not to look for updates but they're constantly posted everywhere. Those people that once supported the idea of us now support Sinb with Yoohyeon. As much as it hurts I feel like I should do the same. Yoohyeon can give her what she wants. The relationship that I wish I could give Sinb. I just wish she could be with Yoohyeon and at least be around me.

Maybe distance is what she needed to move on but all it's done is drawn me back to her. Eunwoo often wonders why I always seem distracted when I'm with him. I've had to lie to him constantly because there's no way I can explain everything to him. Recently I've found myself thinking about the night in the van. Sinb told me everything and I couldn't accept it. Sometimes I think I should've let her continue to ignore me. At least then she's still be promoting with us. Even if the members try to hide how much they miss her I know they do. 

They try to hide it to save my feelings but it doesn't matter because I already place the blame on myself. Because my thoughts and words were contrary I lost the one person I love more than anything. I’m still regretting now. She left because I couldn’t say what I wanted to convey. So please meet in my dream. At least then I could see you. All I've wanted ever since that not was to be able to see you again. Seeing you with Yoohyeon has made me selfish. 

I wish I could've explained at that time, but I couldn’t keep up my courage. I couldn’t do anything for you. I wish I had the courage to tell you how I truly feel because I feel so much more than I let on. I wish I could've done more for you but I was too scared it wouldn't be enough. 

If I had the chance to tell you everything again I would tell I can’t live without you. I would tell you that I love you. I wish I had to take whatever I said that made this gap so empty. Sinb, there is no one like you. No one but you. I would tell you that my love for you will never stop because no one can stop it. Because my love is you.

Even if the feelings are distressful I'd take the opportunity to be hurt again if I meant I could truly tell you how I feel. I would promise that someday we'd be together without fears but if that promise doesn’t have any meaning then I'd take your rejection. I'd take your rejections a million times if it meant you knew how I truly felt. I'd do it if it meant only memories stay in my mind of how I was honest with you. 

Nothing solves this emptiness in my heart knowing that you've moved on from me without hearing my side. I should've told you the first opportunity but something in me believed there would be a second chance. No matter how I try to forget I now know that was my only opportunity. 

Nights I come here I try to forget all the mistakes I made that hurt you. Even when I closed my eyes, I still see your face as you told me you couldn't do it. The tears in your eyes. The pain in your voice. The years of holding back finally released only to be rejected. 

With my eyes closed, I could hear the footsteps. I open them and see an old couple walking by me. I give a gentle smile as I imagine how it would be if it was us instead. I feel my stomach light on fire at the image I only see in my mind. I see us together in public without fears. The happiness we've desires finally granted. The world around us is empty because I only see you.

I see us together growing old next to one another. We smile at each other as I tell you.

"I can’t live without you. I love you" Only warmth left between us because the hard times have passed. "Sinb, there is no one like you. No one but you. No one can be over you. My love is you."

But my dream is suddenly brought back to reality when I remember Yoohyeon. Part of me wants her to leave but I know I can't do that. All that I ask is someday, if there is anyone else other than me please don't forget me like I do. It may take me a while to accept you with her but I could never accept a world where you've forgotten me. So if we have forgiven each other only once let's meet again

Even if it isn't me that you end up with I can’t live without you. Even if you don't love me, I love you. Even if you replace me, there is no one can replace you. For me it will always be you. My love for you will be immortal. No one can bury it. My love is you.

Hwang Eunbi no matter what the future holds my love is only for you. Whether I am able to give to you without the fear of consequences or not. Although you may not feel like my heart only beats for you just know that it does. I know that I'm a coward for how I handle my feelings and I wish I could overcome that. As much as I wish it was me who was receiving your love, I at least hope that she does the things you want her to. I hope she isn't like me with her actions. I hope that she loves you as much you deserve to be loved. 

A/N

We finally know how Yerin feels... Anyone else heartbroken. These two are so sad in this story but I promised a happy ending so just wait! Please comment and upvote. I started a twitter au version on my au acc @/daddyeunji and if anyone wants to follow my real twitter acc it's @purplebjh thanks for reading until next time! I want to apologize for anyone that is waiting for other ship chapters... Since I've made this one such a long story I would like to finish it before starting other one/multi shots because it's easier to write the story if i don't try to think of other stories at the same time. please wait for my to finish this shot because i promise other ships will be included in this fic!

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Comments

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Incarnadinejourney
#1
Chapter 17: Thank you for the update author-nim. Can't wait for the epilogue.
Kamiyama_Hime
#2
Chapter 17: Thank you 4 updating, author!
I’m so happy they finally will have an official announcement!
But also I don’t want this story to end TT
I enjoyed it so much!
Gfriendfangirl
#3
can we get a M rated epilogue...hehe
SinRin03
#4
Chapter 17: I hope it's real and they really announced that they're in a relationship haha but who am I kidding.. I miss this story authornim thank you for updating
D2kalang
#5
Chapter 17: Amazing story
wnsr_28
#6
Chapter 17: Aww!!!! They came out!! And you updated!!
Incarnadinejourney
#7
Chapter 16: I missed this story, I wish you stay safe and healthy author-nim.
YeEun86
#8
Chapter 16: Welcome back authornim!! This update is so cute and fluffy. Thank you!!
Kamiyama_Hime
#9
Chapter 16: Author, you are back!
Thank you for updating! I missed this story so much and I was waiting for this date chapter so much!
They are so soft and cute :(