Glad To See Ya

Visions Of Gideon

"How can you not know? You've been at this freak show for more than half a year now? Is this really not bothering you at all at this point?" Sungyeol blares by his side, throwing the wet rag in the sink with animosity.

"By all means, if you have a better idea, I'm all ears. What would you have me do?"

It was all retohrical, of course. No suggestion would make sense putting into action.

"Something. Anything!" comes the aggravated screech.

"Could we not do this now? He's barely able to breathe as it is. Let him save the..." Sungjong aids him to better hold onto the sink.

"...he's been saving enough breaths to ignore the fact he's dying and stubbornly doing about it." Sungyeol verbalizes with slow burn.

He would laugh, even a bitter one if he could muster up anything than loud wheezing at the moment. It was getting crazily annoying to conclude just how bad love could kill you. Literally taking your breath away by clogging your airways with reminders that not a single second passes without emotions feeding the exact chock into them, viciously anchoring into his heart.

How can one explain it's a matter without recourse. How can he let his friends know he will never be able to escape his own body's doing?

Sungyeol will never accept either rendition. For him, it's always black and white.

Sungjong may admit for a bit of grey on the line, but he's still unrelenting in dubious matters of choice.

"I'm not dying,Yeol." he manages a weak reply, happily accepting the younger one's cool attending.

"Yeah, well you're not living, either." the brooding male answers from the threshold.

"Hyung, let's get you checked up, huh? It will ease his worries a bit." Sungjong pleads, helping him keep his footing at bay.

"You're a good kid, Jongie." he finally smiles, hoping to deliver some small amount of hope to his foolish attempt of sugar coating the facts.

"Leave him be, he's made his choice." he hears Sungyeol muttering before the door is shut closed behind him.

He wants to tell him, tell them otherwise, but no matter how veiled, the truth is invariable. And he can't stop it, howbeit painful it is to see his friends witness it.

It's no one's fault. It isn't in the books, hence no cure known for it.

It's terrible, yet worth it. He understands it will be the hardest to digest for his friends, but he's made peace with his hazard.

"I called Woohyun hyung, regardless." Sungjong mentions while he sets a glass of iced water on his night stand. "At least you'll have some sort of professional help around. All he knows is you had an upset stomach." he sighs with sadness oozing out of him."Take some rest, hyung. It was a bit too much this time."he says, picking up some scattered petals.

Silence is soon his next best companion; for the littlest of while, anyway.

Sunggyu tries to ignore the rampage peaking through his deep inhales, but he is all too aware how useless it is.

He feels love engulfing his blood stream and its physical form creating anarchy in such a magnificent pattern, even he himself can't deny.

It burns and it stings while he chucks up petals and buds alike; dark velvety burgundy paints his floor in a huge array. He can barely keep his wits up and he's starting to become restless with the lack of proper oxygen.

Good thing Sungjong isn't here, he'd flip.

He cries out in frustration at his frailty, staggering in hopes of hiding all evidence before Woohyun gets to him.

Tonight might just be the night when he comes clean to him, when he makes the first step to saying goodbye. The thought is excrutiating, mutilating his insides as another spew steals his sanity.

He's a trembling mess by the time he manages to clean all traces of inner turmoil.

The gadget in his pocket chimes with a new message and he dreads to open it, seeing the sender's name. Nothing good ever came out from Dr.Lee's notifs.

He doesn't get to find out what it is. Woohyun is bursting in the apartment drenched and breathless, but to Sunggyu he is the most beautiful presence he could hope and loathe to see.

He takes his time commiting to memory every little detail his eyes fall upon before the latter storms at him, hugging the daylights out of him.

"BS! How can it be Hanahaki? It must be a mistake." he cries and Sunggyu finally understands. "I swear I....Gyu I never once not loved you." Woohyun wails, panting with hurt, while he kisses him with salty lips.

 Sunggyu knows it all too well. He didn't have to hear it; not now, when he feels it in every shaky breath of his own. He almost wishes Woohyun didn't love him, because it ing hurts! All their love is literally killing him from the inside out. But it's honestly his body's fault and Woohyun shouldn't have to feel so guilty.

He can't accept this might be their last hug, kiss, talk,confession.....He made peace with the reason, not the timing of their parting!

"...can, can we sit?" Sunggyu asks in a whisper, sky-rocketing the other's worries.

He shouldn't enjoy his help to this extent, but he can't do much against the warmth that spreads from Woohyun's arms to his skin, even if the other is still wet from being in the pouring rain. Having him close is strangely clearing his senses; he hears the raging storm outside, and a crazy heartbeat next to him as he is being ushered to the bed.

"Are you OK? Do you need anyth...."

"Stupid, it's you who has to take a shower." Sunggyu cuts in." Go on, I can't have us both sick. I'll be here when you've finished." he begs him.

With reluctance,Woohyun actually complies, but Sunggyu knows best. He probably needs to compose himself before facing an ugly truth. To be honest, he still can't fathom how he put up with the lie so far, seeing how the other is never gullible.

His throat is both itchy and sore, but he puts off the jerk of gladiolus threatening to burst out.

One quick look at his notifs and he grasps the urgency in it: Hyun came across your lab results. Didn't get into details. He's on his way.

Both Dr.Lee and Woohyun were working at the same hospital, though different departments. So much for patient confidentiality.

"He's not a chatterbox, you know." Woohyun steps out of the shower, in only a pair of track pants.

"Did I complain outloud?" Sunggyu wonders.

"You've been alarmingly distracted lately. Unsurprising, I see now." he comes up beside him, silently checking the signs of distress." The lab gave me your results by chance since I was spewing your name on the phone when they asked what patient's I came to pick up. Imagine my surprise when Howon frigging goggled when I inquired about it."

The explanation doesn't ease Sunggyu a bit, even if he wants to at least chuckle at parts of it. He recalls their last conversation on the phone, not even 3 hours ago. Woohyun had definitely been on his way to pick up lab results, booty texting and just in the middle of it, Sunggyu started vomitting, last hearing the latter's loud calling of his name before he turned the gadget off. It wasn't uncommon for Sunggyu to end such calls, because of the recklessness of it all, so Woohyun didn't insist with good reason.

"I'm not apologizing." he looks at Woohyun.

"You really wanna go this way?"

"It's already too ed up, Hyun. How can I make this easier?"

"I'm here with you." Woohyun hurries to give his support, but stops midway.

They stare in silence, but eyes speak tons. Piece by piece, Woohyun sees what his words, his emotions do to them and it's heart breaking to witness his disquietude.

"I don't think you not loving me would've made it any better." Sunggyu finally speaks, reading the other like an open book.

Tears pool into his eyes and he's breathing harder because he needs to get so much out.

"I can't accept.....Gyu...." 

"My own body rejects love. This happens because I love you, not the other way around." he whispers. "I tried thinking how it would feel if you didn't. It wouldn't have made any difference. I can't fall out of love." he confesses, crying soundlessly, like each time he thought this through.

I can only die from it. The unspoken words hang in the air between them.

"We can't give up. There must be something, even if it's an autoimmune form, there has to be....." Woohyun pushes through, holding his trembling hands.

"I looked, I tried....God, I tried." Sunggyu hollers."I put this off as much as I could. No matter what I do, I'll end. And I am terrified I'll do more damage around me, than inside me. I'm the broken one, why do others have to suffer at my expense?"

He receives the strong hug with a dying man's dread. His hiccups soon bring out the beauty and the torment of his sickness, taking Woohyun by utter surprise.

It's a mess of feelings and facts combined in an outbreak and both of them lack the opportunity to come to terms with what this all means.

Soon, it's mostly a blurr of whispered undying love and promisses of next encounters, but the urgency of Sunggyu's state is soon overlapsing the dreams with harsh reality and Woohyun is left to part with a critical patient at the ER station.

He can't stay and wait powerless at the OR doors. He won't.

Howon takes part of his discomposure upon himself, mostly because he fears Woohyun would do something stupid. One black eye is a minimum price, though he sees the other wishing roles would be reversed.

The moment Sunggyu's friends reach the hospital grounds, Woohyun gets his wish with a sickly smile on his bloody mouth( courtesy of Sunyeol). Before Howon is done explaining the uncommon situation to them, Woohyun is already out and about, with no care for apologies or hope for good news.

"We have to find him." Sungjong grabs Sungyeol's arm.

"Let him be for now. Let's go tend to your scratches." Howon offers.

"No...I'm, I'm good." Sungyeol pants, barely registering his bloody knuckles." All this time, I hated Sunggyu for loving a creep who played with his feelings. And it turns out it was hyung all along? How crazy is this?" he screams. "What will become of them, now?" he adresses the doctor.

"I haven't thought it through, guess I stalled too much for anyone's liking." Howon admits. But, this can't be good for Woohyun, either. Losing Sunggyu will..."

"The you mean losing him???" Sungyeol turns beastly on him."Hyung will come out alive from this!"

"We don't know it." Sungjong weeps.

"He put up with this circus, he'd damn better survive a stupid surgery." he roars, fists shaking at his sides.

His bluff is soon called by Howon, who pats his shoulder in comfort.

"Even so, it will only mean Woohyun will become affected as well. Surgeries remove flowers and feelings alike."

It's a shattering image to see the pain and sorrow mirrored on Sunggyu's friends' faces at the oncoming resolution.

"I'll go look for Woohyun." Sungjong states, after brushing the tears away.

"Who the hell invented Love, anyway?" Sungyeol chokes out, crashing on the waiting seat.

"We'll figure something out." Howon says, more as a self reflection.

 

Five years after

"Hey, sorry to pin this on you at the last minute, but....I have a favor to ask."

Bright, shinny eyes smile at him with the innocence of an angel in disguise.

"Pinning already implies you expect me to do whatever you need. But, sure, ask first." he plays along, driven by nothing more than curiosity.

"Perks of being the shop owner." the guy winks with loud giggles on the side. He's used to it, by now, he thinks. 

"You're lucky I like you." comes the disbelieving shaking of his own head. No matter how much he tries, the other will always have this power over him. Had he ever been this indulgent?

"You tolerate me because I write good checks." the answer comes like flash.

"Point taken. So, what problem are you facing that you need me to do extra work?" he finally gives in, making himself busy with a few wires to build the pillar of his new arrangement.

"You're gonna charge me double, huh? Fine." the other clicks his tongue, obviously curious about what he was up to this time. Truth was, they were playing this game often enough to know it was more charade,than anything. But the other did stand by his words and always compensated him for over chores.

"Kidding."

"Mhm, I'll pretend to believe you. Anyways, I am swamped with 2 receptions and I kinda need you to look after the shop today." he gets into the haze of  his reasoning, the thing one dreads every now and then. "Now, don't get all crazy. It's probably not a very busy day and I've already set the cashier to be double checked through my phone. What could go wrong?" the man takes the most honest guess, which in retrospect only spurrs cringe in him, almost at the expense of his finger.,while busy cutting the wires to their fitted length.

" Need I remind you the last failed attempt at me playing your part?  How could you even consider it twice?" he emphasizes, gently putting the scissors down.

"It's this or you deliver the arrangements to both receptions." the shop owner dead pans.

"Consider it done." he goes right into it, without second breath.

"Which one?" 

"The deliveries, of course." he grunts almost childishly stomping his foot. Sometimes he feels the owner is a kid himself and he's just playing along.

"You're a life saviour." the other chirps, handing him the bindings he was searching without looking.

"Why do I feel like I've fallen into a trap?" he accepts the props, narrowing his eyes at the prospect.

"No idea." the owner raises his shoulders unabashed. "Anyways, here are the addresses. Be sure to make a grand impression."

"I'm not that great with high heels." he answers by habit. They have this game of mocking the high nosed and certain acts of theirs.

"Now, that's an image I won't easily erase from my mind. Ok, go amaze!" the owner makes a 'Pow' sign of fireworks. He's sure in his head, that's exactly what happens most of the times.

"Yes, queen." he takes a bow.

There might have been some not so appreciative adressings towards him lacking man qualities, but that was just stupid talking. And parodies were fun when you played with the right partner.

Contrary to what people saw, they really did get along just fine. He'd been lucky enough to lend this job at the flower shop, nearly a month after his discharge. Not like he had anything better to do since he was an absolute clueless being after he woke up. Not his fault his brain decided to go on a long holiday. He had felt so cooped up in the hospital, everyone testing and trying all therapies available, that one day he bounced out.

He discovered he couldn't do much with himself, but he definitely had a skill with flower arrangements, so after a short class, he found himself nailing the best job ever and never regretted it since.

The ride to the first ceremony went smoothly, that he even indulged himself a moment of freshing up with some rainbow flavoured ice drink set around the garden. It looked childish, but also very welcomed in the hot summer day. Some commotion stirred his curiosity, that he found himself following the loud cheers. Apparently, the folks invited to the wedding were offered some playtime before the serious business and they were trying out different gigs around the park next to the hall. Ladies were screaming happily, most likely at one of the men shooting arrows in hopes of winning some cute stuffed toy for them. The moment one of them rolled the sleeves of his shirt up, they went wild.

"Well, too much is too much. That's my cue to bounce." he dusted his pants, ready to amaze again.

Not even five steps away from there, someone cried out his name, stopping his walk.

"Hyung! It's you, isn't it?" a lanky dude came running to him, panting from the effort.

"I'm sorry, I...." he stuttered, looking sideways in hopes he didn't address him.

"Don't you remember me? It's Sungjong." 

Talk about amazing. The dude had lavender shaded hair and his entire outfit screamed Rock, as opposed to his checkered shirt and loose jeans with pin strapped cap, something kin to a  Mark Twain's character.

"Oh my God, wait till the others see you. We've been looking everywhere for you." the guy rushed to take his hand.

"Uhm, you clearly have the wrong person. I'm just here for the flowers." he points with his thumb to his back where the van was parked. "I really don' think we run the same circle, or universe for that matter." he chances another stare of the obviously top fashion wear.

"No, it's you. Just....I guess you've never fully got back to us." he mutters, biting his lips. "You've changed, yes."

"Listen, I should get going before I'm charged for delaying the ceremony. Flowers don't just pop out and make themselves presentable, you know." he turns on his heels, but comes to a stop when he's met with  a pair of glossy eyes.

There's so much pain in them, it makes his heart ache. Without realising, his hand is itching to rub on his chest to ease the sudden tension, but at the same time all he wants is to stare into those teary eyes and lose himself to the passion beyond the sorrow on the surface. They seem to have broken a promise and found retribution; it's a caroussel of emotions that takes him to the edge and into the whirlpool of it.

"Let me guess, you're emotional because I look familiar, right?" he tries to wake up from the daydreaming.

The one in front of him tries to inhale and seems surprised he's able to do that, but soon gulps down the impression and his lips with nervousness.

"It's the allergies, actually." he coughs, rubbing at his chest in the same manner he wanted to do before.

Oddly, his mind seems to connect some invisible dots that make all his reactions intimate. He's fascinated by the prospect, but also jittery; which is more than he felt since his discharge.

"In that case, we better part soon. I'm bad for you." he shows off the flower shop pin with his ID. The hurt etched to the other's face is more than he cares to acknowledge. "Well, congratulations and, I'll be off doing my...job."

He's a bit curious why he'd suddenly turned clumsy, but he's busy enough to put all that in the back of his mind.

"Wait, can I ask something?" the lavender haired guy hurried after him.

"If you can walk and talk, sure. I'm really behind schedule. I gotta be somewhere else in less than 2 hours." he says, grabbing 3 sets of garlands and rolls of silky ropes.

He doesn't mind the chat, but he's still feeling closely watched, like he's some villain.

"I'm Sungjong, by the way."

"Yeah, I remember you saying that the first time." he admits, making himself busy and trying his best to ignore the retreating back of the teary one.

"Aren't you going to introduce yourself, too?"

"Why does it matter? Not like we're gonna bond or something. I may look like someone you know, but I assure you I've never ...."

"Maybe you just forgot." Sungjong whispers.

He's getting annoyed for some reason and before he knows it, he flares-up .

"Listen! I'm not very sociable to begin with, but this whole thing is getting out of proportions. I'm just here for the flowers and that's all you need to know. I don't want my employer to get in trouble because I couldn't keep my mouth shut, but I won't back down when I feel cornered."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to." Sungjong apologizes. "You really remind me of a dear friend we lost."

"What's lost can't be replaced." he huffs, tying a strong knot around a bunch of flowers.

"Not so easy accepting." the other exhales, slowly stepping back.

"That's your problem." he growls.

"Still, glad to see ya, hyung."

The rest of the time he doesn't get assaulted, except for maybe some litlle kids wondering what he was up to on the arch. But the distraction is welcomed.

He leaves the place faster than he ever planned, anxious to get away, but fails to notice the clandestine presence at the back of the van. It's only when he gets to his next stop that he's met with a pastel fluff of tulle in the midst of one box of white pink gladiolus.

To say he was startled it's an understatement; his heart did double takes.

"Oh my...what are..."

"Where is Gyugyu?" is the first thing she asks him, once he spotted her. "I made this for him." she shows off her rusty braiding attempt of a wreath.

"Kiddo, how did you get in here?" he murmurs, petting her head in hopes of calming himself." Your mom must be going crazy by now. What am I gonna do with you now, huh?" he takes a sit beside her, smiling fondly at her makeshift.

"It's ok, she's busy getting pretty." she laughs whole heartedly that even him can't resist. "Did you see Gyugyu? I want him to wear this. I put a lot of love in it." she tries to whisper, but comes out loud enough.

"Oh, did you now?" he feigns surprise.

"Yeah, he can't love, but I know it's a lie."she pouts. "He loves me tons and he makes me giggle and he's so funny when he doesn't cry. Why do grown ups cry?" she looks at him.

"Uhm...I guess because they hurt. Or they miss someone." He gets a sudden flash of the guy with the allergies and it bothers him.  "Probably your mom is crying right now. We really need to get you back." he tries to evade the discussion.

"Mommy cried when I was born. I saw it in the video. I think she was scared I looked so ugly." she mulls over.

He bursts out laughing without a care and she follows suite. It's the nicest feeling and he's grateful. But, he needs to be adult about it.

"Kiddo? What's your name. I need to get in touch with your folks before they go mad with worry. I'll try and wrap this fast, but I think it's best if they come fetch you." he calls Dongwoo for info, leaving him to deal with the news.

"I'm Sohyun." she says, soon after clamping her hand doen her tiny mouth with scare."I'm not supposed to talk to strangers." it dawns on her.

"You really shouldn't. Much less get in their van. It's very dangerous." he pokes the tip of her nose." Well, I'm Woohyun." he shakes her hand,to give her assurance he's not a bad person. "And you, young princess are in for a bit of fun before your parents come and get you. Wanna help me with the flowers?"

"Princesses fall in love with knights who protect them."

"I guess that's how the tales say it." Woohyun admits, amuzed.

"Can you love my uncle, instead? I will be most grateful." Sohyun bows her pretty head at him.

"I'm sure he will manage without your sacrifice."

"No, he doesn't want to anymore." Sohyun fidgets with her flower wreath. "He cries when people are asleep. I asked my dad and he said he is healthy now, so he must be missing someone, right?" she looks for validation of her thinking.

Woohyun is lost to the familiarity of her words. It's like she wrote down what he felt earlier, but the two weren't probably connected.

"Well, I can't promise, but I'll help you one way or another. Now, will you join me?" he asks her, waiting for the girl to find her balance before she jumps into his arms.

"I can't promise, but I'll help." she chuckles merrily.

The next hour is the happiest he's ever experienced in his life. Well, part of it that he still remembers, anyways. He may have acted a bit too harshly, cutting ties with all the 'past', but he felt it was the right thing seeing how his memories were lost and he needed to get by in time with the present.

Sohyun is the second person who allows him not feel bitter about his choice; he had a gift and he was enjoying sharing it, to bring joy to others. The little girl is a fountain of jubilation that he couldn't deny brought him smiles.

He's almost yeilding to her childish request, but he keeps things grounded. 

People around seem to fancy her and he gets good vibes that help working faster. He does, however mind he has to repeat their lack of acquaintance to them. It's surprising to find, deep down, he'd love to be part of her life.

His phone chimes with news that Dongwoo finally got word from the other place and that they're comming to fetch her.

"Looks like the fun might be over." she pouts." Gyugyu will not be happy."

"Anyone who loves you would be scared to death if you went missing. Try and not do that, ok?" he puts a gladiolus crown on her head. "Pretty." he smiles.

"Uncle has a whole book of pressed petals like these. It's very important to him, but he never tells me why." she huffs.

"Well, one of their meaning is remembrance. Maybe he wants to  keep a dear memory." Woohyun chances.

"Hyun-ah." a distressed shout is breaking the moment, causing Woohyun to close his eyes with the oncoming ring in his ears.

He barely registers arms brushing his shoulder in the act of hugging the little girl.

"Why are you sush a daredevil? You gave us the scare of the century." the man's voice is shaking.

"Gyugyu! You came!" she chuckles with renowed joy in her voice." I'm ok, Woohyun took care of me." she says, while the other is checking every single patch of her. "Look, he made me this. Isn't it pretty? It's like your book."

It doesn't take much for Woohyun to understand the impact her words have on him. The pregnant pause is enough testimony.

"How could you not see her in the van? Why hold her up here, didn't you think we'd be frantically looking for her?" the assault doesn't fail to come.

"Gyugyu...he didn't..."

"First of all, don't pin your mistake on me. She wasn't mine to keep an eye on." Woohyun tries to hold himself from roaring. "Secondly, some of us are still working on the clock and can't afford to play chaperone. Thirdly, I didn't have your contact, since I filled in today for my boss who I understand explained things to you as soon as you answered your damn phone." he growls.

"I..."

"Check you facts before you come and accuse strangers of kindnapping."

"Woohyun, don't be upset. Uncle was scared: right, Gyugyu?" Sohyun molds her tiny hand into his.

"Don't wonder off, princess. Your...uncle can be scarry when he's scared." he pinches her cheek.

"Wait. I wanna thank you. Sohyun can be a handful, but..."

"She a precious girl. Don't lose sight of her, again. Not all strangers are kind."

"You're not a stranger." the other casts his eyes down.

"Triggering allergies at first sight does not count for acquaintances." Woohyun snickers.

"No, I guess not."

"Come to think of it, we're surrounded by flowers as we speak. Why aren't you..."

"Uncle isn't allergic to flowers." Sohyun adds.

Woohyun feels like a joke. His temper is short, but he can't scare the girl like that. He wants to punch the guy, but thinks differently on second tought. He's just a stranger, no point in starting a ruckus because of him.

"It's best we part ways." Woohyun recomposes himself.

"Most probably, yes."

"Wait." Sohyun yells after him, scurring off from her uncle's arms to get to him."Does this mean you can't keep your promise?"

"Sorry, princess." he bends down on his knees."Seems like we're bad for each other."

It's heart breaking to see her tears, but better to be honest than feed her lies. He has a strange feeling the guy in front of him is more affected, but it only annoys him further.

"Sohyun, let's go. Mom needs her flower girl. We've bothered Hyunnie enough."

"What did you call me?" Woohyun frowns standing up again. 

"Uhm, sorry, just a habit." the other avoids his eyes."We'll be going, now. Thank you, again." he says in a hurry, picking his niece up and getting her into the car.

"Habit implies you've done this on a regular basis." Woohyun throws at him.

He doesn't buy this lie. It's at the tip of this tongue and it's disturbing, but he feels robbed of something of great value.

"In case you failed to notice, her name contains 'Hyun'. It's perfectly logical to be calling ....." the man starts the engine with urgency.

"You didn't adress her like that. Stop running away!" Woohyun hurries to grab onto the vehicle's front door.

"We're late for a wedding. If you'd just let go." he pushes hard at his hand,turning to strap Sohyun in her seat.

"Gyugyu, is this him?" he hears the girl weep as the man fumbles with the seat belt.

They both stand still under her gaze.

"Who is she talking about?" Woohyun find himself pressing the matter."Who the hell are you?!" he jumps into the car."I'm not moving a muscle until I get answers.You've been acting creepily around me, it's like having a ghost on my shoulders."

"Get out. I don't.."

"Drive. We can talk at the wedding." Woohyun presses.

"Weren't you busy over here?"

"Stop stalling, wacko."

"Gyugyu....are you ok?" Sohyun downright cries outloud.

"Princess, I'm sorry, I'm just trying to make your uncle make sense. I don't mean to hurt him."

"But you do. You ALWAYS do!" she shrieks, slapping his hands and running out of the car.

"Hyun-ah!" her uncle chases after her, followed by a disheveled Woohyun.

How did things get so hectic? He can feel the other's anguish like it's his own. And it's about so much more than a cute girl running away from them. Woohyun is scared he might've scratched the wrong secret chest.

"Princess! Stop, please."

"Sohyun-ah!!"

Woohyun finally gets hold of her, barely out of harm's way, hitting the back of his head in the process. He doesn't feel the pain, rather remembers it like a long forgotten dream. It scares him, because he feels invaded with such strong longing and grief, it's nothing he ever encountered. Flashes of dark velvety burgundy petals swarm his mind. A sickly version of Sohyun's uncle is smiling at him, but it never reaches his eyes. His eyes are the saddest he's seen.

"Hyunnie! Woohyun, do you hear me?" the voice slowly penetrates the veiled memory and he opens his eyes with a start.

"...memory." he gasps, looking into the same pair of eyes, only they're attached to a healthy built. A sigh of relief escapes his trembling lips.

"Woohyun." Sohyun cries her little heart out. "I'm sorry, I didn't want to hurt you. Please be ok."

"m'okay." he slurrs, patting her head. "Don't cry. Are you hurt anywhere?" he checks on her, vision a bit out of focus.

"Howon, I need your help." he hears the other on the phone while his shaky fingers fidget with the bloody mess in Woohyun's mop of hair. "It's Hyun. He,uhm...he hit his head. I don't know what to do." he sniffles."Hyun-ah, keep talking to him, Ok?"he pleads. "Please hurry." he begs once more.

"We're not really strangers, are we?" Woohyun gets a weak hold of his left hand.

"It's best we stay that way." the reply comes like a memorised line. "Are you feeling like throwing up? What about your vision?"

"What's your name?" Woohyun mumbles, hating he can't see as clearly as he wishes. "I keep getting visions of you, like riding a subway; it's making me dizzy. This isn't the first time we met."

"Sunggyu." Sohyun tells him through hiccups.

The letters play inside his head in patterns of dark red and blissful kisses, whispers of love and mourning of what it stole.

I have loved you, touched you, kissed you........... for the last time.

He's deep under a pile of memories that refuse to resurface at full intensity, like they're keeping some greater evil at bay.

"Please hang on, please. Woohyun, keep awake. Let go of the visions. Anchor to the present." Sunggyu's voice is chanting the mantra."Help's on the way. Just hold on for a bit more." He feels the pressure on his head and the sting is good at making him break out of the haze.

He can make out Sunggyu's silhouette, hugging Sohyun close as he is being rushed into an ambulance and pays as much attention as he can muster to the oncomming questions. He doesn't know how, but he feels the answers are vital to checking his state.

He wakes up a bit hazy, but fully functioning as they relay. He doesn't remember how he got here and it's irritating they keep asking him if he really doesn't know his doctor or the hospital he's at.

"Ok, Mr.Nam. Once your friend gets here, you're good to go. Just take it easy, no heavy lifting and no overworking oyurself. Anything changes, you can call me directly and I'll have you checked up asap."

"You're not flirting with me, now...Dr.Lee?" he reads the card.

"I wouldn't dare."

"Isn't it supposed to be against hospital regulations? That means there's another reason you won't go for it."

"Ever the witty Hyun."

"What are you keeping from me?" he frowns."You seem awfully familiar and at ease with me."

"Glad to see ya."Dr.Lee smiles.

"You're the second person to tell me this."

"I gotta go, rounds and all...I just wanted to bid goodbye."

"Why didn't he come to see me?"he asks the doctor on his way out.

"...?"

"Sunggyu. The one who called for the ambulance. I wanted to thank him."

"It's ok to be still a bit fuzzy. You were at a wedding reception when you fell and hit your head. One of the guests saw you and called the hospital.We don't usually ask for names, but the person who inquired about your health afterwards had to leave the country shortly after, probably why he didn't visit."

"Hey, ready to go?" Dongwoo stucks his head inside just as the doctor is at the door.

"Yeah."Woohyun rumages the news.

"U ok? Need me to support you?"

"Nope. It's like riding a bike. One step in front of the other, right?" he smiles reassuringly.

"No more deliveries for you, mister. You end up spewing nonsense."

"Oh, do you think you can give me a lift? I wanted to check on something."

"Sure. Where to?"  Dongwoo offers.

He's met with an adult version of Sohyun when he reaches his destination, welcoming him inside the manor. Apparently, the little munchkin was on a field trip, but she was very happy to meet the one who rescued her little one. So, Dr.Lee wasn't sticking to the real facts; just like he thought.

"Sunggyu? Oh, he's away. But I can give you his contact, if you'd like." she offers along with a cup of tea.

"Truth is I don't know why I'm here. Maybe to check on Sohyun and apologize, I must've caused quite the trouble, that day." he admits

"Can't say it was too bad. As a doctor's wife I am all too aware things wouldn't  always go as planned. But it was a memorable day with all the commotion,yes." she chortles cutely.

"I don't follow."

"Oh, you don't know? My, how evasive can Howon be."

"Howon...as in Dr.Lee?" Woohyun sips a bit too much that he almost chokes.

"Yup. I'm surprised neither told you  about this." she hands him a napkin.

"And I'm even more intrigued why would they keep it from me that they know each other."

It was time for the lady to be surprised, though she seemed to ponder things.

"Wait here a bit." she asks, scurrying off.

Not a patient man, he finds himself lurking around the huge library adjacent to where they sat, but soon he's met with a whirlwind of squeals.

"Hyunnie!!!!!!!!!!"

He barely stands grounded before the affront Sohyun is. She seems like she just ate a bar of energy, going around in circles and trying to update him on things completely alien to him. He has to take a seat after a few good minutes, almost tripping over a book on the side of the reading table.

"Huh, Gyugyu's book." she gawks." Quick, put it back. He'll know someone touched it." she urges.

"It's just a book, princess. What harm can...."

"No, this is his super favourite one. He treasures it more than anything.You know, like I told you when he cries. I saw him hug this tiiiight in his arms." she gestures, holding onto his arm for better emphasis."And then, he will fall asleep and wake up all better."

"Well, it looks like a scrapbook."Woohyun flips it over.

"What's that?" she jumps on his knees, already foreseeing an adventurous outcome.

"Like a journal, or just a book with memories and all you loved and treasured at some point."

"Wow, I wanna have one, too. Can we maybe take a peek, for inspiration only." she tests the waters.

"You really are a deredevil." Woohyun laughs, complying without remorse.

He feels like he's intruding, yet walking down memory lane.

Travel receipts, theatre tickets, maps circling down to various places some of which had a photograph of the scenery. Song lyrics, scraps of music sheets, handmade guitar picks, puns and journal entries. He was reading him bit by bit, a literal open book. The ending was full of dark, dried petals and a single gladiolus petal coated in resin sealing a small book safe.

He doesn't know what drives him to break the seal, but the finding is an even bigger question mark. Inside he finds a lab result on Sunggyu's name: Autoimmune Hanahaki Diseaseand just underneath it, an old selca of him and Sunggyu before going to see a Play Bill Phantom of the Opera.

His lungs fail to help him digest the information and he stammers in a frail attempt to keep sane.

"That's why he cries your name...." Sohyun looks at him with sadness.

"Mr.Nam, I've looked everywhere for you. What...Oh, Hyun-ah, you're back. I see you've already greeted..."

"Mommy." she rushes to her mother's arms with big fat tears streaming down.

"What happened, Sohyun-ah. What's wrong?"

"I need to get out of here." Woohyun runs for fear he'll faint otherwise. "Please, excuse me."

He doesn't get far. Dongwoo is close to him, engine running, but someone stands in between. And Woohyun is lost to insanity. He can't recall one single moment he read in there, but somehow he feels they shared every single one.

He believes he's downright stupid at this point, because he can't comprehend what went on, why were they worlds apart, yet still so near.

Sunggyu is walking slowly as if afraid what might happen. He stands grounded, not daring to come near to him, either.

"I don't remember any of it." he rasps.

"You don't have to." Sunggyu replies.
"Didn't I love you?" he gulps.

"So much, that I couldn't fall out of it. And it was killing me." Sunggyu says without wasting a breath.

"That disease....how are you alive?"

"Because you forgot." Sunggyu discloses.

"Do you resent me for it?"

"Not more than you might do me."

"How can I, when I don't even know you?" Woohyun bluffs.

"That's good to hear." Sunggyu smiles bitterly.

"Were you ever gonna tell me?"

Sunggyu gets closer to him, staring him down, but only this. He doesn't even chance a small touch and it breaks Woohyun to pieces for some reason.

"I'm really glad to see you're ok, Hyunnie. Take some rest, you've been pretty shaken up."

"You're afraid." Woohyun concludes.

"Terrified, to be honest. Because I do remember and I do know you." he confirms.

"This isn't the one you lost that's speaking. You know ." Woohyun points out."And frankly, you've changed, too. Feeling lost in familiar surroundings shows how much you did change."

"And how did you come up to this conclusion?" Sunggyu looks at him with uneasiness.

"You stopped being you. When was the last time you updated your scrapbook?"

Woohyun knows the exact moment he's got the other under his spell. They might share a crazy fate, but he feels bound to Sunggyu.

Second chances don't come cheap.

He's more than ready to take the leap.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Simran20 #1
Chapter 1: This was such an intense story.
The plot seemed really different. Happy that they got united at last. Thankyou so much for the update author nim.