Author's POV

Tomorrow exam period would be starting. Chaeyoung really work hard, she studies every night. She know her class is full of smart people. She doesn't want to be in the last place. 

Finally exam is over now, and guess what?
Chaeyoung got a good grades, she's really happy. But it's not over now.
Exam period is over, that's mean school sports competition is started soon. 

And Chaeyoung, she got chosen to join the volley competition. 
Jeongyeon choose her, she said Chaeyoung has an athletic body so she must be good at it. 
Chaeyoung can't say no, she doesn't want to disappoint everyone. She never done something for her class, maybe this time she can help.
But one thing that really made her frustrated.

She never know how to play a fricking volleyball.

Chaeyoung knew she would just be a burden for them. But she's trying to cheer herself up. She tried to think positive and not to worry that much. But, it's not working. She really nervous.

I know i should reject it that time.
Actually the other reason why she didn't reject it, is because she's afraid everyone would talk about her secretly. 
She's afraid they would spreading bad rumors about her. 
She's afraid would really end up alone for the rest of her high school life.
She never want it to happen.

Tomorrow they would start practice.
Chaeyoung need to sleep now, but she's too overthinking. She can't sleep. After calming herself, Chaeyoung start to feel better and a few minutes later she fall asleep.
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It's morning already Chaeyoung wake up before her alarm start to ring.
She quickly get ready and prepare for the training session. She go downstairs, and like always her mom is still cooking. After finished her food, she go towards her school. They would practice in there. Jeongyeon would teach them, she's really an expert in volleyball. She played it since she was 7 years old. And already win a lot of trophy.

Chaeyoung arrived at her school, she can saw Somi waiting in front of the gate. Somi turn at her direction, and start waved at her.

"Chaeyoungie" she called her with a smile on her face.
Chaeyoung run towards her direction.

"Is everyone here already?" She asked.
"Jeongyeon and Nayeon already inside, Momo and Sana they still on their way. Let's go." Chaeyoung just nodding.

They go to the volleyball court. They can see Nayeon and Jeongyeon sat at the ground. They waved at her.

"Chaeyoung-ah, Somi-ya good morning. Are you ready to play?" Jeongyeon approach them with an excited face.

They start practicing after everyone arrived. Jeongyeon really teach them well. You can see it, she really want to win. They start with service, it's really important because you need to do it every time the game start. 

After a few hours Jeongyeon said they will take a break. Everyone sat down feeling exhausted, except Chaeyoung she still practiced by herself. She's afraid she would just be a burden, so she needs to work harder than them.

Jeongyeon saw her still practicing despite feeling tired. She walking towards her direction.

"Chaeyoung-ah, you can stop now. It's okay to take a break, don't overwork yourself." Chaeyoung stopped and turn her head, staring at Jeong. Jeongyeon gave her a strawberry milk.

"Here, drink it. We would continue again soon." Jeongyeon smiled while patting Chaeng's head. Chaeyoung replied her smile and take the strawberry milk.

"Thank you Jeongyeon." Jeongyeon just nodded and walk away, Chaeyoung joined the others and take a break for a while.

Huh... my hands really hurts.
She looked at her hands, it's full of bruises. 
She glanced at the strawberry milk that Jeongyeon gave her before.
Jeongyeon really kind to me.
I need to practice more, so wouldn't disappoint her.

After break time they start to practice again. It's afternoon already, they finished practice today and start to prepare to go home.

"Good job everyone, see you tomorrow." Everyone start to bid their goodbye, and heading back home.

Chaeyoung take a bus by herself. After arrived at home, she quickly take a shower and rest on her bed. She quickly drifting to sleep.

One weeks later the School Sports Competition is starting. Chaeyoung practice everyday but she's still nervous, her anxiety won't help either. Tomorrow is the D-day, she can't sleep for several reasons. 
First because she's nervous and second because her whole body is aches. Her hand really full of bruises, it's even hurt when you touch it. When the ball hit her hand, honestly it's really really hurt. But she still managed to bear it.

I hope nothing bad happen tomorrow.
Please god, let us win this time.
She start to close her eyes.
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The next morning 

Chaeyoung already at her school now, she really prepare for today. She wake up early, she even bring her breakfast and eat it on her way. She decide to practice a little bit more. When she tried to do 'service' it doesn't go well. She didn't hit it strong enough, so the ball didn't reach the opponent area. 
It's because all bruises on her hand. Her hand felt hurt if she hit the ball strongly.

What...
I can't play like this, we would end up being a loser.
Her anxiety start to get worse. The only thing on her mind right now is the worst thing that can happen.

"Chaeyoung-ah are you ready? Let's go, it's our turn now." It's Jeongyeon.

Her team is ready, everyone already in there. There's so many people watching them. Chaeyoung doesn't like it. Her body trembled, it's feel like she's going to get a panic attack. 

Everyone already on their position, The referee blew his whistle. Everything is okay now, their opponent wasn't really good so it's not that hard. Now it's Chaeyoung turn to do service, she's really nervous.

Calm down Chaengie, it's okay
You can do it.
Chaeyoung inhale deeply, and do the 'service'. The ball bounced really high and then fall right beside Chaeyoung.

Noo.... no...
I messed up
She glanced at Jeongyeon with an apologies face. Jeongyeon just smiled at her and mouthing 'it's okay'. But she can hear the audience laughing at her. 

It's hurt...
This is what i feared.
I'm scared people would laugh at me, and that's happen now.

The match ended, they win because of Jeongyeon. Chaeyoung really feel bad, because she can't even do 'service' properly. Chaeyoung sit in the garden alone. 

Why can't i do that?
I already practices everyday.
I even still practiced when they take a break. 
I'm such a loser, i can't do anything properly.
Her eyes start to getting teary, she really disappointed because of herself.

Chaeyoung trying to steady her breath, and wipe her tears. She doesn't want to looked weak. 
Tomorrow they have to play again. But Chaeyoung already decided something.

I won't play again

Chaeyoung going home early, she said to them that she wanted take a rest.
Chaeyoung lying on her bad now, still thinking about what happened before. She still can hear that sound. How everyone laughing at her. She can't bear it again, her tears start to flowed. She cried, letting all her frustration out. 

Feeling useless, unwanted, nothing.
It's really hurt.
She just keep crying until she fall asleep. Her eyes got swollen, her bed sheets is wet because of her tears.

Morning has come, it's already 08.30 and the semi-finals would start right 30 minutes from now. Chaeyoung is still sleeping right now, her whole body aches. She wake up when her phone start to ringing. 

Who's that....
Chaeyoung rubbing her eyes and start to sit down. She grab her phone.

JeonSomi is calling 

Uh... should i pick it up?
No....
I don't want to
Chaeyoung put her phone back, she waited until it's stop ringing. All memories from yesterday start to playing inside her mind. 

I hate myself.
Chaeyoung hug her legs and buried her face on her knee. Her phone start to ringing again. She glanced at it.

Unknown number is calling

Who is this?
Chaeyoung got curious and decide to pick it up.

"Hello, Chaeyoungie"
Chaeyoung stay silent.
"Chaeyoungie it's Momo, i know you are in there."

"Momo... what's wrong?" Chaeyoung said hesitantly. She can hear Momo sigh on the other side.

"Chaeyoungie where are you?" Momo said softly.

"Still at my home.." Chaeyoung's voice is so small, she's afraid Momo would be mad.

"Chaeyoungie i know it's because what just happened yesterday right? I know you feel bad because of it, but running away from your problem isn't right."
Momo said softly, she isn't mad.

"Momo.... i don't want to play again. I would just be a burden, my hand hurts i can't hit the ball properly." 

"Chaeyoung... i believe you can do it. Please we need you, we can't play as 5. We would get disqualified. I know you get hurt when everyone laugh at you, but you don't want to disappoint us right. Show them you can do better."

Chaeyoung start to think about it.
Momo is right...
But i'm afraid i can't do better...

"Chaeyoung please just for today, i beg you. The semi-finals would start soon." 

After a few seconds of silence she finally spoke.
"Okay Momo, i would do it."

"Thank you Chaeyoung."
She quickly hang up after saying a little 'okay'. She start to run towards the bathroom, she take a shower and go to her school. She doesn't even eat her breakfast, she doesn't want to be late. 

She finally arrived at the gate, she inhaled sharply before get inside her school. She walks towards her class, when she got inside Momo ran towards her.

"Chaeyoungie you come." She said while smiling. Chaeyoung just humming and smiled back.

She glanced at Jeongyeon, she's staring at her. Jeongyeon give her a smile and a 'you can do it' hand sign.
They start to prepare and go to the volleyball court. There's so many people in there, more than yesterday. Chaeyoung start to feel anxiety again.

They got into their spot, and the game started after whistle sound. Their opponents today is different. They really look like an expert. It's scared Chaeyoung even more. 

The game just started and they already lost 3 points. But they managed to catch up, thanks to Jeongyeon and Momo they really good at this.

Chaeyoung can't concentrate because it's too crowd in there, she dozing off a few times. She doesn't realize the ball is heading towards her. She can't catch it, they lost 1 point again. She glanced at Jeongyeon.

"It's okay Chaeyoung, you can do it." Chaeyoung smiled after hearing it. 

But things not going smoothly, it's happen a few times. Chaeyoung really disappointed of her self. She tried to catch it but didn't end up well. She really hate herself. She can hear everyone start whispering something while looking at her. 

It's the last time, whoever get this point they would be the winner. 
And... it's Chaeyoung's turn to do the service. 
She glanced at Jeongyeon with a worried face. Jeongyeon always cheering her up from the start but she keep disappoint her. She looking at the ground, and inhale deeply.

I couldn't disappoint her again.
Chaeyoung start to get into her place and prepare herself. She hit the ball with all the strength. 
And...
She failed, it didn't reach the opponent area. 

We lose...
Because of me..
I'm useless...
Chaeyoung can hear the whispering sound start to get loud, she can hear the hurtful words. 
She glanced at Jeongyeon, she didn't angry.
But you can see it, her face full of disappointment.
Jeongyeon looked away, avoiding Chaeyoung's face. 

Everyone start to walk towards the winner direction. Chaeyoung can't hide her tears. She excuse herself and quickly go inside her class.

She grab her things and quickly walk towards the door. She don't want to be seen by anyone at this states. She doesn't want to looked weak. She covered her face with her hand, while walking towards the gate.

But she stopped her step when someone blocked her way. She can't look up or her tears would fall. But then she heard a familiar voice.
Someone that she missed a lot.

"Chaengie wanna go out together?" It's Mina.

Chaeyoung bring her face up, and meet Mina's eyes. Her tears start to fall.

"Mina..." It's the only thing Chaeng said, before she hug her.
Mina rub her back. She can feel the pain too.

Chaengie...
Please don't cry.
It's hurting me.
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Mina, you came in the right time. When i need you the most, thank you.
Again...
-Chaeyoung 

Hello my dear readers, how are you?
So, do you like it? Did you cry because of it? Please let me know? Don't forget to comment below. See you soon.
-🐦Arzi