15

Minjoo,

When was the last time I wrote a letter for you? I know it has been years, several years, since I ever did something heartwarming for you. And I will be honest, I thought financially supporting you in everything you do and want, giving you all the things you need, all the materials I bought for you, were enough. I thought those showed my love already, and I…

I was ignorant of the fact that you, rather of receiving material things, want me to be with you more. It was my fault, in the very beginning, I didn’t know until we reached this point. I have given it a lot of time and thinking, considering all of the things that had happened, including those when we were still in college.

I should’ve given you more time, I should’ve expressed you my love in a different way that money isn’t involved. I should’ve supported you by being present on those special occasions instead of just giving you the allowance you need.

I failed to treat you according to what kind of person you are, this incident showed that despite all the years that we’ve been together, I still don’t know you until today. I love you, all I want is the best, but yes, I was too dumb to realize what the best is, for you.

I was too focused on making a better future, and failed to recognize and appreciate what I have in the present. If only I was able to balance career and my life with you, I’m certain… none of these will ever happen.

It’s not your fault, things didn’t start because of you, but because of my shortcomings. Don’t blame yourself about everything. I appreciate that even after what happened, you’re still wishing for my happiness, and does things to keep me going, but…

I won’t be happy if I won’t be able to take you out of this prison as an innocent person. And I want to settle things between us after this, so please, I trust you to cooperate with me and be truthful. I need you, Minjoo.

And I still love you.

Don’t be afraid, I’m here.

There’s no sad ending here, just trust me.

I believe this time will last forever, just hold onto me tightly.

Truly and still yours,

Ahn Yujin

Entering the courtroom, eyes of the people inside darted on the woman whose hands are locked, being guarded by a set of security. It never felt so nerve-wracking for her, to see an inmate making her way towards the defendant’s table, until it is her wife, Minjoo, who she’s seeing.

Without a word, Minjoo went beside her defense lawyer-slash-wife. Their eyes locked for a very small period of time, and Yujin felt drying in an instant. She gulped, flushing the stone forming in , and was about to speak, “I… trust you.”

She’s not sure whether her wife heard her or not as there was no response. And although it felt like Minjoo is uninterested, she still gripped on her hope and waited. Sitting beside each other, it felt empty, heavily empty.

Things are in their wrong places, they are on the wrong spot, and after realizing her mistake, Yujin can’t do anything but to admit and own up. Yes, Minjoo cheated, but as for the truth, after the talk with Sakura, she didn’t… She suddenly forgot the anger and hatred she had towards Chaewon and Minjoo.

Her pride was stepped on, her dignity is still on the ground, but having to know her mistakes…

Yeah, it doesn’t matter who did more, but where it started.

“Hey, Yujin, why is it taking so long?” From the back where the crowd is, Yena, whisper-yelled.

Yujin turned to her friends and answered, “The prosecutor is still not here, even the judge.” Yena nodded, while Chaeyeon is noticeably eyeing Minjoo who’s not bothering to look anywhere, keeping her eyes down on her lap, where her locked hands are staying.

Yujin and also Yena, turned their attention to the inmate and felt their chests tightening.

Still, unbelievable, amusing in a very negative way, to see the embodiment of perfection, wearing a prisoner’s uniform, having her hands handcuffed, and being viewed as a sinner, cheater, and a murderer.

The heaviness started to devour them, but even before it could swallow them completely…

“Minjoo…” Yujin broke the silence and even…

Held her hand, squeezing it lightly, caressing the back with her thumb…

“It’s okay, just remember what I told you.”

Eyes down on their hands, her own pair is feeling that warm palm Yujin has, that soft caresses her wife does, this is it – one of the things she misses. Watching the sweet action, and processing the words she heard, a memory from a day ago flashed…

“We will leave you for now, Ma’am.” The guards bowed not only towards Yujin, but surprisingly, towards the inmate as well.

“Take your seat.” Yujin instructed while pushing her chair closer to where the inmate’s spot is.

Minjoo sat and watched Yujin a little bit, eagerly moving, like she’s rushing, or anticipating something. In a few moments, Minjoo placed the envelope full of papers of evidences and other more information, down on the table.

And the defense lawyer, instead of initiating the discussion, or opening what they should do, just stared at the envelope before bringing her eyes up to her wife’s dimmed orbs.

A millisecond as she looks at her wife, she heard a slight, a very faint, but emits so much tiredness, or more like… releasing devastation kind of sigh.

“I’ve studied everything and wrote some things I noticed, it’s in the envelope.”

A smile shaped in Yujin’s lips, it worked…

Her small effort did.

“Okay, thank you.”

“I don’t know if everything will be helpful, I just wrote them down just in case.”

Yujin nodded while opening the envelope, picking all the papers inside, “It’s okay, your willingness helped me already.” She smiled, and even let out soft chuckles.

Silence…

And Yujin was already expecting that, but who was she before?

Who was this puppy before? How do people view her before back when they were still students.

She used to be so goofy, right?

She smiles and jokes even at those times when it should be heavy.

She’s just…

Taking herself back.

That one Minjoo loves.

“I will read these later, for now…” she tilted her head and looked at her wife once more, “I need to brief you on what’s going to happen in your trial.”

There, it got a little heavier again and the lawyer noticed the worry embracing her client-slash-wife, so she,” Don’t worry, you’re innocent, we’ll be able to get through this. Just listen to me…”

Minjoo nodded, weakly, she did. The unsettled issue they have as a married couple was set aside, and priorities were set. For now, they have to fix this mess first.

“I am still not aware of who the prosecutor against your defense is, so I’m not sure about the capability and skills. But what I’m sure about this…”

“They will still question your knowledge in the medical field, your connection with Chaewon, the time no one knows where you are, which was suggested to be the same time when the chemicals were injected and your motive.”

“You are most likely going to be asked by questions which answers are a yes, or a no only before going on to ask you questions to find loopholes in our set of evidences.”

“Now, remember what I told you before?”

“Do not respond with irrelevant answers. As much as possible, just answer yes or no and I’ll take care of the others. And don’t panic if you’re they are grinding you with questions, remember…”

“Always remember, you’re innocent.”

Right, she’s innocent…

And, “I’m here.”

“I’m just here, we’re here.” Minjoo’s walls are again, being crushed, just this simple touch together with these soft words coming out from her wife, already make her feel vulnerable.

Minjoo’s lips parted, not to reply but to let out a sigh. Letting herself loosen up, composing her whole being, preparing her toughness, in order for things to be in accordance to what Yujin is planning.

“The thing is…” Here it goes.

“Even though I can and want to get you out of here as soon as possible, there are a few things I still need to find and the time given to us was still not enough.” There was a pause in Yujin’s word as she hesitates, but Minjoo got it already, and gave Yujin an expression which indirectly says, ‘Go ahead’.

“I might need you to stay here for a while, because, like Sakura-unnie and Eunbi-unnie, I will lack in resources if your case will be closed without us finding who it is. I can’t leave it without being concluded, I also want to help to chase justice for Chaewon-unnie’s death.”