golden

Golden Hour

 

          The next time the club met up, Chae Young kept her eyes out for Jung Kook. He walked in late, and quietly settled in a corner as he usually did. As usual, he was dressed in a black T-shirt and ripped jeans.

His hair tumbled in wavy locks, framing his sharp cheekbones. His eyes were soft and his grin boyish and innocent. On second glance, he didn’t look as forgettable as she had thought.

They were watching a documentary that day on Salvador Dali. Chae Young settled down next to a senior called Chan Su, the only person she corresponded regularly with from the group. The documentary was well underway when she felt a soft tap on her shoulder. She turned around and looked straight into a pair of deep-set, soft, dark-pupiled eyes. They looked apologetic at the moment as though he was sorry for interrupting.

“I’m sorry but can you please pass me a pen,” said Jeon Jung Kook in almost a whisper.

Chae Young tore her eyes away from his and leaned forward to grab a pen from the shelf near her. Nonchalantly, she held it over her shoulder without turning around. His eyes were like those of a hesitant puppy and it caused a visceral reaction in her to gather him up in her arms and keep him safe. She leaned away from him, as though fighting the urge to turn around and look into those eyes again.

Chae Young thought of mentioning her encounter with Jungkook to Bona, but the opportunity did not present itself for quite some time. Before she could, another club meeting came by.

There was to be a University festival soon and the club had been asked to produce some volunteers to help design the posters as well as paint the photo booths. Because the photo booths required more time and physical work, the responsibility was promptly relegated to the younger students, while two third years volunteered to head the design for the posters. Chan Su turned to Chae Young and asked if she’d be willing to volunteer for the photo booths. Because Chae Young was close only to Chan Su from the club, she felt obligated to agree. 

“Great,” Chan Su said and looking around added, “Then, Jung Kook, why don’t you help her? Not because you are a junior but because you’re really talented and I think your style suits the festival.”

Chae Young did not turn to look but her ears perked up with anticipation.

“Ok,” Jung Kook said softly after a pause.

And Chae Young smiled inwardly.

 

Jung Kook did not talk much even when they worked together. Two more students- Minji and Jung Hwan who were both sophomores, had volunteered to help with the photo booths. This meant that Chae Young did not find much opportunity to be alone with Jung Kook. But soon enough, she was glad for it, because Jung Kook was as terrible a small talker as she. When they met up, they would exchange polite pleasantries and fall into stretched-out silence before someone came and rescued them. Jung Kook would become animated only when they start discussing the designs. Still then, he gave his opinions softly and politely. It took Chae Young three meet-ups to have a solid reason to ask Jung Kook for his number.

Because Chan Su corresponded only with her for updates, Chae Young became the unofficial in-charge of the photo booth painting team. This meant that the others felt obligated to listen when she divided up the work or chose designs. She saw that Jung Kook was, as Chan Su had pointed out, talented. She found herself leaning towards his suggestions and ideas often. While the other two would suggest their own inputs, Chae Young, with her soft tone and her sweetest smile, would persuade that Jung Kook’s ideas were more suitable for the festival. She had to admit that as a woman, one learnt to persuade and entice with sweetness early on.

The days went by in a blur, and Chae Young was nowhere closer to Jung Kook than when the volunteer work had begun. But sometimes when they passed each other around the campus, Jung Kook would walk over just to say hello, and then walk on without stopping to small talk. She liked it. She also noticed that he was in the library often. He was not always studying of course. Sometimes, she’d see him watching movies or napping and once or twice, she saw him playing games. But she liked how often he was in the library.

She was beginning to grow attached to the idea of Jung Kook and did not want to share stories of him with Bona. Or Ye Rin. Or Ji Soo. The rare, stolen moments were for her alone.

She’d notice tiny details about him; like how he’d ruffle up his hair when he was flustered, how he’d wear the same pair of Woodland boots almost every day, and how he’d bite his lower lip when he was focusing on a difficult detail.

But Chae Young refused to think it a crush. She told herself that it was simply a superficial interest. Even if she was suddenly spending a lot of time at the library. And even if she was disappointed on days that he did not turn up. No, Tae Hyung was the one she had a crush on.

***

“Chae Young-ah?”

Chae Young knew the voice even before she turned around. The deep husky voice that was the highlight of her day.

“Tae Hyung-shi?”

He stood tall and handsome before her, his intense eyes light at the moment as he smiled at her.

“I haven’t seen you around lately,” he said as he walked over.  

“Ah yes… I joined a club,” she tried to explain.

“Come, join me for a cup of coffee,” he said, gently steering her by the elbow. Because it’d be weird for her to resist, she complied but slightly moved away so they don’t touch.

Tae Hyung was still attractive of course. Chae Young watched inconspicuously as he added sugar to his coffee and tasted it before adding some more. She was subconsciously thinking of how Jung Kook liked his coffee without sugar when she suddenly caught herself. Why was she even thinking of Jung Kook?

“I loved your work at the photo booth,” he said.

“Oh thanks, but that was mostly Jung Kook. He did the lion’s share.”

“Ah… Jung Kook? From the mathematics department?”

“You know him?”

“We stay on the same corridor in the dorm. A quiet kid.”

“Yes, he is. Very talented too.”

“Seems to be.”

“Why don’t you come to the studio tonight? Ji Soo and I are preparing for an interview and we need your help with our English.”

“Cool. What’s the interview for?”

“An internship abroad.”

“Oh… the States?”

“Yes.”

Chae Young could have laughed then and there for how accurate her prediction had been.

“Yeah sure,” she said, suddenly relieved at having received an answer to her suspicions.

“Did you do something to your hair? You look nice today,” he complimented.

But Chae Young was happy to laugh his compliments away.

***

“Recommend a book you like,” Jung Kook said unexpectedly after the small talks had given way to stretched silence again.

“What do you like?”

“I don’t read much, but I’m open to reading what others like.”

His answer made her smile.

“I like Murakami. You should try Sputnik Sweetheart.”

The conversation ended there.

A week later, Chae Young received a text message from Jung Kook late at night.  It simply said, “I will not be listening to an unrequited love song for a long time now.” Without him having to explain that he was talking about the book, she immediately understood. It made her smile. She had not thought that he would even read it. She replied saying, “I hope you meant that you liked the book.”

Jung Kook answered that he did.

She sent a short “glad” to which he responded with a smiling emoji. That was the end of the conversation.

Her friendship with Jung Kook was not as easy as it had been with Tae Hyung, mostly because there was no mediator like Ji Soo. As the semester drew towards the end, the club had stopped meeting up so students may prepare for the semester exams. Her interactions with Jung Kook became limited to the whispered greetings in the library. Chae Young took solace in the fact that he would still be there in the campus when they returned the next semester.

***

But seeing him again came sooner than she had expected. After the end-semester exams, Ji Soo and Tae Hyung were planning to go on a road trip. Ji Soo asked Chae Young to join them. They were driving to Gamcheon Culture Village in Busan and spending a night there. Chae Young did want to see Gamcheon. Also, she was old enough to have some adventures in her life besides a broken heart and a secret crush. So, she agreed.

It was the night before they were to leave that Ji Soo mentioned about Tae Hyung bringing a junior along with them. The boy’s hometown was in Busan and not only did Tae Hyung need a local guide, but they would be giving the boy a ride home as well.

“His name’s Jung Kook, I think,” Ji Soo added.

“Jung Kook?” Chae Young was surprised.

“You know him?”

“Yes, he’s in my arts club.”

“Oh great, then this is gonna be a fun trip.”

***

Chae Young sat in the back with Jung Kook, bags between them, while Ji Soo sat upfront with Tae Hyung. The back-seaters were content with listening to the banters and debates of the front-seaters.

For breakfast, they stopped at a ramen shack along the highway. While choosing their ramens, Tae Hyung tried to caution Chae Young that the one she chose would be spicy.

Before Chae Young could respond, Jung Kook said, in his quiet voice, “Chae Young likes spicy ramen though.”

It caught Chae Young by surprise because she had never told him or mentioned around him that she liked her ramens spicy. While they ate, Ji Soo and Tae Hyung were bombarding Jung Kook with questions and Chae Young was free to ponder about Jung Kook’s casual remark earlier. During the time they were working together on the photo booths, Jung Hwan would usually buy their snacks since he had a bike. They would just text him what they wanted to eat, and he would bring them from the cafeteria. And because she and Jung Kook did not talk much, they had never discussed food, let alone what they liked. If Jung Kook had noticed, he had probably noticed what she ate and how she ate. The thought of it sent a warm sensation through her, but she was also embarrassed to dwell too much on it. After all, it was just ramen.

The journey continued and Chae Young found how much more conscious she was of Jung Kook’s quiet, unassuming presence inches away from her than she was of Tae Hyung whose eyes she met once or twice through the rear-view mirror.

Around the time they stopped for lunch, news reached them that there had been a landslide due to a mining accident and the route they were to take to Busan had been blocked off. The routes would not be open until the next day.

Tae Hyung suggested that they find a hotel to stay for the night. Ji Soo was asking if they would find any in the area since it seemed so remote, when Jung Kook said that he knew a family close by who could allow them to stay.  

The family turned out to be a family friend of Jung Kook’s grandparents. They were a sweet elderly couple whose children had all left home. Because they agreed to take in four youths on such short notice, Chae Young asked Jung Kook if it’d be ok if she offered to cook.

Jung Kook looked at her for a moment and then his eyes seemed to light up as he smiled. “Yes. I’ll help you.”

There is a word called moonstruck. That was the closest to describing how Chae Young felt at that instant when Jung Kook’s face lit up. It caught her off guard. Perhaps also because she had never imagined such an expression on his face. It was so disarming, so pure. Because, she was momentarily fixated with the smile in his eyes, she had to remind herself to respond.

“Ah… ok sure…”

Jung Kook then asked Tae Hyung and Ji Soo to go take a bath and relax, which they agreed to with relief.

Chae Young was not much of a cook, but she had helped at home before. Jung Kook, though admitting that he did not know how to cook, moved about with a surety in the kitchen. If Chae Young was chopping onions, Jung Kook would grate the ginger without being asked to. If Chae Young washed some potatoes, Jung Kook peeled them promptly. How he knew what to do felt reassuring to Chae Young who was a bit nervous about cooking food for their host and most importantly, for Tae Hyung.

Probably for the first time, Jung Kook and Chae Young talked while they cooked. They talked about when they first started painting and what they enjoyed about it. Jung Kook said that he just happened to like both mathematics and arts from an early age while Chae Young said that she started painting after she began to read. Jung Kook had an older brother while Chae Young talked about her older sister. Chae Young asked if he was a Believer. Jung Kook said it was funny she should ask that because he had been an agnostic for a long time. Towards the end of high school, he began to read up, and had only recently reverted to being a Believer. He asked what about him had prompted the question. She said that his style of art suggested something Christian, yet something not too puritanical either. Then they talked about music. Jung Kook guessed correctly that Chae Young likes acoustic music. Chae Young did not guess that Jung Kook was a hip hop and R&B fan. He said he liked how much of personality those genres have even as they are often dismissed as ‘street music’. 

Chae Young was surprised by how much she knew about him with the little they had exchanged in the short span of time.

As they sat down for dinner, Jung Kook was telling their host that Chae Young cooks very well. Even as she was trying to wave away his compliments, it felt as though she had known Jung Kook for a long time and everyone, including Tae Hyung and Ji Soo, were guests to the space she shared with Jung Kook just then.    

***

It rained that night. Chae Young pulled on a hoodie and crept out of the room that she was sharing with Ji Soo. She headed for the front porch to watch the rain but discovered that someone had beat her to it. She knew from the lean, wiry frame that it was Jung Kook even from the silhouette.

“Hey…” she whispered.

He jumped slightly and turned around. “Oh hi… Chae Young-shi.”

“I couldn’t sleep.”

“Me neither.”

Neither of them said anything as the rain drummed on the roofs and the thunder rumbled distantly. Chae Young was fascinated by how loud and alive the rain seemed in the countryside. For miles and miles, both on the ground and in the sky, there were no lights at all. It was a vast stretch of blackness that made her feel so small. It was unlike the city where buildings after buildings would be lit up all night. Here, she felt humbled by the might of the rain. It felt as though the two of them were the only living souls on earth.

She was a little surprised by how Jung Kook did not attempt to make small talks, but she liked it that way; she liked that about him. They stood feeling the rain in silence until Chae Young decided to head back in.

“Good night,” she whispered.

“Good Night, Chae Young.”

She noticed how he didn’t add ‘shi’. Whether it was the rain or the dark vastness, she wasn’t sure, but there hovered something very intimate in that moment, something words and logic couldn’t explain coherently. She smiled as she turned away and she wouldn’t have been surprised if he knew that she smiled despite the darkness.

The next morning, as they met in the kitchen, their host was already preparing breakfast. Tae Hyung walked in, hair tousled, one hand shoved in his pants pocket and wishing them good morning in a husky, croaky voice. Chae Young thought in amusement about how many girls would kill to witness him in that state. But right behind him followed Jung Kook and he flashed her a smile of familiarity, as though they had always been good friends. The gesture touched her, and Tae Hyung’s light just seemed to dim.  

After breakfast, they resumed their journey. That day, Chae Young and Jung Kook talked but in their usual way- slowly and softly. And for once, they were no longer making small talks.

“What are you two conspiring about in the back?” Tae Hyung joked at one point.

 Chae Young only giggled.

The rain slowed down but continued to drizzle, and everyone was praying that it did not worsen the landslide. They stopped for lunch at a highway food shack where the food seemed a bit stale. Because Chae Young did not eat, Jung Kook offered her a bar of nutmeg chocolate. She had not had nutmeg chocolate in a long while because of Koo Jun Hoe, but this time she took it all too gladly.

They had to wait a while at the shack because the rain had steadily picked up pace. When they resumed their journey, they drove slowly. It was towards evening when the sky finally let up. They were along the highway in the middle of nowhere when the first rays of sun broke through. Tae Hyung pulled over because the sunlight was too pretty. It filtered through from behind the clouds- soft, watery, and catching the droplets on the plants and trees, making them glint. Everything was awash in a soft golden hue that made the world seem like an old, nostalgic photograph. Ji Soo ran out of the car, asking Tae Hyung to take pictures of her. As she struggled to find the perfect view, they walked further and further away.

Chae Young walked around to the side of the car where Jung Kook was leaning against the vehicle and watching the sky.

His face also glowed golden as though she was looking at him through a vintage filter. His skin was lit up and she wondered if he never had pimples as a teenager.  

Again, neither said a word as they stood there silently taking in the view and the golden sunlight. The chirpings of birds were slowly and steadily ringing across the sky.  

If the rain felt as though they were the only two souls on earth, the golden sunlight felt as though the earth had come alive for them.

For Chae Young, the two moments she had shared with Jung Kook felt as intimate as the time Jun Hoe had put her hand in his coat’s pocket and they had shared an apple-flavored gum.

And she felt it then, as they were absorbing the golden hour- a tiny inkling, that somehow, she would love Jung Kook fiercely.

***

 It was late in the evening by the time they reached Busan. Jung Kook had arranged their stay at a friend’s house rather than book a hotel. The place was just outside of Gamcheon. They were so tired out from the journey that right after dinner, they headed straight to their rooms.

At around midnight, Chae Young was woken up by the long, drawn-out, haunting melody of a violin. She laid there for a while listening to it. When she sensed that the source seemed to be moving further away, she scrambled out of bed. She opened the window, but the source seemed to be from the other side of the house. Earlier, Jung Kook’s friend had taken her to the terrace because she wanted to hang up her wet clothes. Now, she slipped out the door and tiptoed up the stairs. Sure enough, the sound of the violin was much louder on the terrace. As she ran to the railings, she finally saw the source. A man with a beret pulled low over his face and dressed in suspender and pants was playing it at the corner of the street.

Chae Young watched fascinated. Was it a theatrical act? Was it an experiment? Was it a love letter?

She shivered, excited at witnessing something so whimsical. Just then, she heard footsteps come up the stairs. She whipped around to see Jung Kook walk through the door.

His face broke into a delighted grin on seeing her. “You again?!”

She chuckled. “Yes, me again.”

He walked up to where she was standing. “Woke you up huh?”

“Yes. Who’s he?”

He shrugged. “It happens once a while,” he explained. “The place is home to artistes. The residents are used to it.”

“What haunting music,” she said wistfully.

“I know. It’s beautiful.”

A night breeze made Chae Young wrap her arms around herself. Jung Kook took off the cardigan he was wearing and put it around her shoulder. She protested but he insisted that he was fine. Chae Young secretly did want to keep the cardigan on, and the gesture warmed both her heart and her cheeks. She pulled it tighter around her, catching a faint whiff of a fruity scent.

Neither said anything until the violinist began to move away from the corner of the street.

“We keep finding each other, don’t we,” Junk Kook said as the melody started to recede.

She chuckled. “Yes, we do.”

“I like you,” he said.

The way he said it without any ceremony and without any apprehension as though he was talking about the weather confused her.

“Oh… thank you? I like you too,” she said uncertainly.

He chuckled. “Um, I mean… I think you are more than you let on. And I admire that.”

Chae Young was glad that it was dark as she could feel her face burn despite the chilly night breeze.   

“Ah…” she chuckled awkwardly. “I’ve never heard that before.”

A pause followed her dismiss.

“I- I mean I noticed when we were working for the university festival. You lead well and is firm with your decisions,” he said at length, “but I initially assumed you would be soft and… well, easily overpowered.”

She laughed at this and admitted, “That is probably the nicest compliment I’ve heard.”

“It isn’t just that,” he continued. “I think you’re really smart too, but you don’t show it. And I- I find it… admirable.”

Chae Young blushed furiously, but kept her composure as she responded, “Gosh, that’s a lot to take in. Um, thank you. I think you’re incredibly talented too and you often don’t let that on. I also think that’s- really admirable.”

At this, Jung Kook broke into soft laughter. Relived, Chae Young also joined in.

“I would like to hang out with you sometimes,” Jung Kook said finally.

She smiled. “I would like to hang out with you too, sometimes.”

And like any other time, they said nothing as they stood together watching the night sky in the disappearing melody of the violin.
 

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Comments

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rosiepark_ #1
Chapter 2: so cute!
RParkSJ #2
Chapter 2: ❤️ I love the pace of this story. It’s soft with hints of intensity … a tiny inkling, that somehow, she would love Jungkook fiercely.
justcrazy #3
Chapter 2: I love this. Very sweet
Haxelite
#4
Chapter 2: Thats really cute.
So glad i read this :)
keiik0
#5
Chapter 2: Aww. So sweet ♡
youknees_ #6
Chapter 2: That was so sweet ?
wink99 #7
Chapter 2: This is really beautiful <3