"Congratulations on your graduation, sweetie! Your Dad and I are so proud of you!"

"Thanks, Mom!"

A smile curved up my lips as I watch one of my classmates share a heartwarming hug with her mother. Her name was Saera; we were not close and not once did we talk to each other unless needed but I felt happy for her.

She was in this hellish place called high school, one of the few students who were at least humanly nice to me. She never helped me upfront when I was bullied, but she would secretly run to tell teachers about it or when no one was looking, give me bandaid for my wounds.

If I was lucky enough and the time allows her, she would quickly place her P.E. uniform in my locker, so I could borrow it whenever my uniform gets torn or wet from whatever foul-smelling liquid poured on me.

There were probably hundreds of times I could have talked to her either secretly or upfront, I could have made her my friend but I wasn't stupid. I could see the fear in her eyes as she helped me and I didn't want to bring her into my painful, hellish world.

Saera's head suddenly turned towards me and I could see her smile become stiff as our eyes met. Her surprised expression softened when I waved at her and she gave me a hesitant smile.

I saw her whisper something to her parents and I froze as she turned and ran towards me. My heart hammering nervously inside my chest as she handed me a medium-sized, black box.

"Please be strong." She uttered shyly "I..uhh...College is different...I mean... it will be different."

I watched speechless as Saera mouthed her goodbyes before running back to her family. As I stared at her leaving the gates of the school with hundreds of other students and their family, I couldn't help but think what it would have been like if I have been brave enough to ask her to be my friend.

Wiping the happy tears from my eyes as I sat on a bench and opened the box she gave me, I smiled at the contents inside it. There were rice cakes and a ticket between a folded handwritten note which I hastily opened to read.

~~
Hi,

I hope you liked the rice cakes my mother made. She was happy to make it for you, so please eat it without worry.

Also, please don't feel offended about the free meal ticket. I don't mean anything bad by giving it to you. I just thought I wanted to share the food at my favorite restaurant. In my opinion, they make the best Beef Rib BBQ. I hope it cheers you up when you're down. The ticket will expire in a month so please go there as soon as possible.

Honestly, I wanted to eat BBQ with you, but I will be leaving immediately after graduation. Our family will be moving to Seoul as it's where I'd be going to for college. If by chance you decided to study there or just visit, will you give me a call?

#011-2013-0612

I have been meaning to tell you, but I guess I was just either shy or embarrassed to admit it. I am sorry for being a coward, for not helping you upfront and for not trying to be friends even when I know how much you needed someone to lean on. I was scared and so I could only help you secretly. 

Please forgive me, Hae Soo.

-Kim Saera
~~

My tears flowed unceasingly after reading the letter, It took every bit of self-control not to sob as it would be embarrassing to do in front of the remaining students and their family in the school grounds.

My blurry gaze landed on a handkerchief and I blinked in puzzlement, I shifted my gaze up and met eyes with the person handing it to me.

"T-thank you-"

"Rin." The girl uttered "Second column, 3rd Seat."

I chuckled as I wiped the tears in my eyes with the handkerchief "I know, you're Saera's friend."

Rin's eyes gazed over the opened box on my lap, her head seemed to ran over countless thoughts in her head before a smile curved up her lips.

"Saera's leaving for Seoul but I'm not." She uttered, "My friends and I are going to have a BBQ party, would you like to come with us?"

My jaw almost dropped at her invitation "M-me?" I couldn't believe what I just heard.

Was I going deaf?

"Yes, you!" She nodded, pulling me up from my seat with a chuckle.

"B-But-"

"Come on, don't be shy!" Rin grinned excitedly as she led me out of the gate "My house is near the school-"

I whisked my hand from her grasp and she gave me a puzzled look as I took a step back.

"Y-your other friends won't like it if I'm with you." I spoke "I-I'm cursed, remember? You'll lose them-"

"You are not cursed." She said, grabbing my arms in surprise. "Don't let those petty words get to you."

The firm look in her eyes shook the worried thoughts off my head and a warm smile spread across my face as I held back the tears in my eyes.

'Don't let those petty words get to you...'

It was the very sentence I kept telling myself ever since the series of misfortune that occurred in my life. Today, it was especially comforting coming from someone else.

__________

The smell of juicy, sweet barbecue meat entered my nose as I stood at the gate of a two-story house. The sound of cheers and party music echoing from the backyard and the colorful, blinking lights dancing to the beat somehow made me sweat in anxiety.

I have never been to a party before, not once, not even the graduation ball everyone had been so excited about. What was I supposed to do now that I have let Rin drag me along?

Will I be able to hold a conversation properly?

What if something bad happens and I get blamed for it?

"What are you doing there?" Rin's voice made me flinch and I stared at her with my nervous wide eyes, unable to speak as my hands tightly held on to the box Saera had given me.

"Hey! You can't be shy all the time." She laughed, pulling me into her world "My friends are your friends, loosen up!"

I coughed, covering my nose before I could inhale more of the mixed smoke from barbecue meat and cigarettes wafting my way. Rin was immediately surrounded by her friends, some I could recognize as our schoolmates from their uniform.

My hands went cold when they looked in my direction, they were smiling, a few waving for me to come nearer. Why were they suddenly so nice to me?

Was it really okay? Me, a cursed person to be with them?

"Hey!" Rin's hands grabbed the box in mine and for a moment I panicked, hugging Saera's gift closer to my chest.

She laughed, placing a hand on my shoulders as she pointed at the far corner where all the other bags from the guests were placed.

"You can put your things there while you're here." She grinned "You can't party holding that, you know?"

"O-Okay."

I trudged my way towards the table, taking the bag off my shoulders in the process. I dropped it with the other bags and carefully placed the box beside it, throwing a hesitant gaze at its direction before letting Rin pull me into the dancing crowd.

The sun was setting and I have drunk maybe three to five glasses of alcohol. I was probably tipsy but somehow I didn't care, I was laughing and smiling a lot as I danced with Rin and the others. I felt happy and thrilled to finally feel included.

For once, I could finally call someone a friend.

"It's good to loosen up, right?" Rin uttered, nudging me softly on the side.

I smiled, placing my pork skewers back o