From a distance I could already see the contours of Jisoo's home and immediately my excited, almost hectic pace slowed down by itself. 

At first, after I had left Sehun's house, I couldn't find my way around the strange environment he lived in, had lost all sense of orientation again and was almost about to bite my own because of my haste and just turn around. But even before I could get further annoyed with myself, maybe even lost my way, I had fortunately found my way back to the main road, which was still very busy, so that it was now easier for me to orientate myself at least halfway.

From then on, Jisoo's house was only a cat's jump away, as I noticed surprisingly. But exactly from that point on, the last, final meters that had to be overcome and which now separated me from my new life, began for me at the same time. And somehow it made me feel as if I was in a medieval gauntlet. With every step I took, my heart weighed several tons heavier in my chest, and with every meter my fear increased dangerously. 

I knew why I was doing it, I also knew why I had to do it, but there was still that little bit of cowardice in me that wanted to stop my plans at all costs and that tried to push me against the direction I had decided on. It was as if I was now walking down the road of my life as I moved closer and closer to the home of Jisoo. But just before I reached it, the road suddenly split into two forks. The first led into a bright, light-filled corridor where I had nothing to fear and which represented my entire life so far. 

So if I chose this path, I could turn back at the very last minute and continue my life as I knew it without any problems. The other fork, however, was dark, cold and incredibly scary - at least that's how it felt to me. It was also the turnoff that led directly to my friend's house and if I should actually decide to go this way, I did not know where it would lead me in the end. What would become of my life - how much of it would change? My future, in any case, lay beyond the dark path, I knew that. 

I could feel it from the depths of my soul and yet there was that cowardice in me. And the fear that tried to persuade me for the obviously easier of the two ways. That fear that wanted me to pull the emergency brake again and cowardly and thus flee from all changes. And for the tender moment of a moment I was even briefly willing to let this cowardice guide me. But then... then I remembered Sehun. That impudent and yet wonderful jerk for whom I felt so much and through whom I regained all my long-forgotten hope. 

Through him I had learned that sometimes it was worth taking the plunge into cold water, because even if I decided to take the seemingly easier, brighter and less dangerous way, at the end of it all that awaited me was a big room full of emptiness. And if I had reached this at the end of my life, I would look back in me full of pangs of conscience, loathe myself for my cowardice and die without ever really having lived - I was sure of that. Because what was it called again? Appearances are deceptive, aren't they? And so did this seemingly uncomplicated way. 

That's why I had to choose the dark path, no matter what, I had already done it. Even if I did not know where it would take me, let alone how much it would change my life, I was quite sure that at the end of this path there would be no dangerous monsters, no daring traps, no room full of emptiness waiting for me. No, at the end of the dark path there was only Sehun and his tender, warming embrace, for which it was always worth taking this step into the unknown. 

With all my courage and all my hope, I finally overcame this last hurdle and plunged with fervent determination into the darkness of the veiled fork in the road. Shortly afterwards I pressed the button of the bell when I arrived at the locked door of Jisoo's home. My breath suddenly became hard and shaky, while muffled sounds, as someone echoed through the room with echoing steps, penetrated through the door from the inside. My cowardice sent a queasy feeling into my stomach and screamed at me again and again in desperation to turn back on the spot. 

But it was too late - a soft beam of light crept out of the house when Jisoo finally opened the door a crack wide. Now there was no turning back. The time of change had finally, finally arrived. »B-Baek?«, I heard the confusion in her voice. I looked up and immediately met the questioning look of her brown eyes, which carefully glanced out through the gap in the door. But I couldn't resist them for a long time and so I lowered my eyes nervously to the ground. What could I say now?, it shot through my head in panic, overflowing with sudden thoughts. 

Damn it, I should have at least come up with some approximate wording in advance. I used to do that whenever I was faced with difficult situations: I would go through different possible scenarios in my mind again and again and think about which reactions would have been the most appropriate at the given time. But now my mind seemed to have let me down, while every muscle in my body was cramping and an uncontrolled tremor was running down my arms. I took a sharp breath, tried to calm myself down and direct all my thoughts towards Sehun and my intention.

Sehun, I thought desperately and in the next moment I could see his shadowy figure in my mind's eye. He stretched out his arm towards me, smiled encouragingly and immediately an undreamed-of wave of warmth and confidence flooded through me. It was as if a heavy chunk fell from me, which took away some of the tension. I nodded gratefully before I finally turned my full attention back to Jisoo. »Hey.«, I greeted him in a fragile voice and nodded embarrassedly on the wide sleeve of my shirt. »Sorry I'm late.. can I come in?« A second of hesitation passed, then two, with Jisoo checking me out top to bottom.

Uncomfortably, I shifted the weight in my legs. »This is very bad right now.«, she said evasively, and suddenly avoided looking me straight in the eye. »Or did something happen?« »Yes.. ahm.« I stuttered confusedly. »I really need to talk to you, Jisoo.« »What's so important that it can't wait until tomorrow?«, she kept printing. Was it my imagination or was she trying to get rid of me? She used to be happy every time I came to see her, but now? Now her voice sounded sharper, almost dismissive. What was going on there? Did she know why I was here? Or did my senses just play a dirty trick on me?

»I want to explain that to you, but I can't do that between the knots - so please let me in.«, I asked her urgently and slightly anxious, as I had to confess. »I can’t.« Jisoo evaded me again. »I… I have a visitor right now.«, I paused and looked up at the sky. I did not know exactly what time it was, but the fact that the sun had set quite a while ago must have made it 'very late' by now. The night sky was overcast, but the clouds were so thin that the moonlight penetrated them as a faint silver glow. 

So who was visiting Jisoo at this time of day? Could it be the same person who made him leave school yesterday in such a conspicuously unremarkable way? And most importantly, why wasn't I allowed to go in? »What…« I started and turned my eyes back to Jisoo, who seemed to be hiding behind the dark brown front door in front of me. »What kind of visit is this?« »Well.«, she replied stretched out and immediately I knew that she was deliberately hiding something from me. »That's so... Well…«, she cleared . »Jisoo? Where did you put the T-shirt?«, suddenly another male voice came from inside her house, vaguely familiar to me. 

Jisoo then lost all her facial features, while she gave me a caught look. I, on the other hand, froze into a pillar of salt. A boy was with her? »I'll be right there.«, she called back before she pushed herself faster than a torrent through the open crack of the door and closed it again behind her. Breathing quietly, she finally leaned her back against it. I did not only get to see her eyes, but her whole appearance and had to realize with great astonishment that Jisoo was only dressed with loose-fitting jeans and a belly-free top that could also be considered a bra

In addition, her hairstyle seemed more untidy than usual, while everything about her seemed jumpy and completely confused. It really didn't take a genius to put one and one together. »Are you hiding something from me?«, I said to her with a delay and almost laughed out loud. Ironic, isn't it, this whole situation right now? Jisoo gasped in shock. »Does it look like what it looks like?«, she asked in horror when she hadn't missed my look at her. »Because that's not how it is at all!« »Is it? I growled and crossed my arms in front of his chest. »I can't wait to hear the explanation.«

It was strange what feelings surrounded me at that moment. On the one