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It was so dark it felt like the world had out.

All the lights had turned off.

The sun in his heart was now scattered leaves.

Sitting on the floor in his room with back against his bed, Jongin had knees drawn up to hide his face. Namjoo had left with her mom. His father was standing guard downstairs, so he couldn’t run out of the house after them.

Jongin had given up.

“I’m sorry,” Dami apologized from the other side of the door. “I was just worried about you.”

“Go away,” he croaked.

Tears were still fresh on his face.

It wasn’t fair.

It wasn’t…

He had liked her.

He had liked her…

It wasn’t fair.

A chunk of his heart had gone missing and it hurt. Quietly sobbing, Jongin hugged himself.

In the morning he refused breakfast. Came down last minute and sat in the back of the car as his father drove them to school.

“Exams are coming up. You two better study hard,” his father lectured the entire way. “Lets not forget, you’re graduating soon, Jongin.”

He didn’t answer and pushed the door open before his father completely stopped the car.

“Jongin!” his father screamed after him, but continued to walk off. Leaving Dami and their father in the dust as he joined the morning stampede into school.

He needed to get to the classroom early. Namjoo may already be there. He wanted to sit and talk with her. Ask her things like had she slept? Did she cry? Had she eaten? Where was she staying?

But Namjoo was not in class. She didn’t come in late either. She never appeared the entire day even if he waited around, walked around, searched outside the school for her.

Namjoo didn’t come to school.

Regret spread through his body.

For the first time, he sauntered home alone. Replaying the many times he had traveled this road with her. Underneath the cherry blossom trees. Joking with her. Talking. Carrying her on his back. Holding her hand and crossing the street with her for ice cream on the other side.

He missed her.

“Jongin.” Jongin perked up, but his heart plunged when it was only Dami.

“Leave me alone.” Jongin angrily murmured and moved further away from her.

“I’m sorry.”

in a breath as fire rampaged him, he turned around, prepared to go off on her. And then…he didn’t.

He was angry. He was upset. He wanted to curse the world. Scream at his father. Blame Dami. But none of that would bring Namjoo back. Not into his life.

Stuffing his hands into his pockets he left her behind as he walked off.

He didn’t do homework at the dining table that evening. He sat alone in his room. At his desk for the first time since Namjoo moved in. Just staring at the math homework. Unable to remember how to solve anything. Not finishing anything before Dami knocked on his door and said dinner was ready.

Jongin ate without speaking to anyone then stalked upstairs in a silent fit. Closing the door to his room again. He sat with his father the following days mutely as they went through the application process to study abroad. Scotland. His old man had prepared everything, laid out the plan for the rest of his life.

See the world he had mulled, but it was just Scotland.

Suddenly in the blink of an eye, everything was meaningless. A world apart he worried, but really, he and Namjoo were being separated by a thousand miles right here at home.

He didn’t even know where she was now and that hurt him the most.

And then one day he saw her slowly trudging through the crowd of students by her lonesome self. Head down. Hands clinging onto the straps of her backpack. A formidable smile spread across his lips as he continued to watch her from down the hall. All the lights lighting back up in his world with every step she took.

Namjoo was still here.

On automatic pilot, his feet moved to go to her. The crowd split up around him in murmurs. Finally, Namjoo’s heavy footsteps slowed when she walked into him and lifted her head up for their gazes to brush.

“Hey.” He greeted.

Namjoo lowered her eyes. He feared she would walk around him and continue after the crowd that had gone.

Instead, she looked back up and returned the greeting. “Hey.”

“I thought you weren’t here anymore.” He said.

“I’m,” she did a tiny shrug, “still here.”

“I don’t see you in class.”

“I got transferred to another…”

“Oh…I didn’t know they could do that.”

“Well…it just happened.”

“Are you going home?” Jongin asked. He turned to walk with her. Exhilarated to be going through motions they’d already done.

“My mom’s picking me up.” Namjoo said.

“Then…I’ll walk you to her car.”

“Ok.” His heart raced faster when the corner of her lips curved up creating a pretty smile.

For a moment they walked bathing in silence. Side by side, and everything about that made him feel full. Feeling the happiest he’d felt in weeks.

“My mom and I moved into a small apartment,” Namjoo told.

“Really? That’s good.”

“How did you do on your exams?” she wondered.

“Better than midterms,” Jongin admitted. “What about you?”

“I did ok,” Namjoo replied.

Sunshine wafted over them as they walked out of the school building. Toward the bench where he once sat waiting for her. Sweet memories.

“The other day,” he confessed, “my dad brought a lady home.”

Shame washed over him when Namjoo peered up at him. He didn’t mean to say Namjoo and his mother weren’t good enough or that Namjoo’s mom was just another lady to his dad.

“I suppose that’s good news,” Namjoo tried.

“I actually don’t want him to get married again.” Jongin said.

Stopping, Namjoo turned to look at up at him. She seemed shorter. A good height to be hugged