Chaeyoung arrived at the address written on the piece of paper Jeongyeon gave her. She took a deep breath and her hand trembled the moment she looked up the apartment walls.

“3rd floor. okay.” She stuttered and gulped “here goes nothing...”

She nervously walked into the apartment building and reached the third floor. The apartment has an open hall, enough to see the neighborhood by just walking by. Chaeyoung got off the elevator to see the wide hall and open boundaries, her hand trembled in nervousness as she walked quietly with nothing but the sound of her footsteps and her beating heart.

“3.. 310.. 310..” she mumbled

Sana’s apartment room seemed to be at the end of the hall, the closer she gets to her unit, the louder her heartbeats. 

“Ah.. no.. I am not going to do this!” she grunted and turned around with a halt. It kills her to know Sana was sick because of her... It was her fault... “ah! n-no... I’m leaving!” She continued to walk back and thought carefully with a sigh she turned again. “Let’s get this over with...”

She took a deep breath and walked directly towards her apartment unit- her hand lifted for a knock but she couldn’t make her hand to make the first knock. 

“ahh!” She dropped to her knees and reached out for her scalp— ruffling her hair.

"Just do it... God damn it!" She stood up immediately and lifted her hand once again, but just before she could attempt her first knock the door suddenly opened to reveal a familiar face.

"ah!" She jolted

"C-Chaeyoung?"

"M-Mina?" she knitted her brows thinking that she might have gotten the wrong apartment unit.

Mina tilted her head as she noticed Chaeyoung carrying some plastic bags.

"Are you here for Sana?" She smiled

"Oh.. uh... y-yeah.."

"Where's Jeongyeon?"

"Uh... I think she had something to do."

"I see..." Mina knew what was up, so she willingly lets Chaeyoung in

"Come in.. She's upstairs, the door to the right." Mina uttered

"Oh.. uh... thank you..." she stuttered and walked in their unit.

Chaeyoung anxiously walked up the stairs and turned to the right to see the door right in front of her— She gulped. Mina watched her stood still in front of Sana's door with a smile and shook her head as she just left the cub alone.

The latter took a deep breath and turned the knob of Sana's door— revealing her bright and subtle room, filled with the soft colors of pastel pink. She has a small balcony that radiates the sun perfectly under the view of the neighborhood. Chaeyoung walked quietly, trying her best to not make any sudden noise that could wake her up. She finally got closer to Sana and eyed her for some time.

Her forehead was hot sweat formed at the edge of her hairline from her heat. She lies there so still as her skin radiates the heat from her blood. I refilled the bucket of water with colder water taking the towel on her forehead dipping it in the water. I squeezed the excess water before putting the towel gently back on her forehead. I’ve never seen her so lacking in life and the guilt of her getting sick because of me bites down hard. My finger traced the curve of her jaw. Even in this state she was still drop-dead gorgeous. Her looks were intoxicating. I could look at her all day if I could. One second passed. Then another followed by another, the guilt was eating away at me. A fire burned inside my throat and mind, regret hitting me like a sledgehammer. The events of yesterday replaying in my head. 

‘If you didn’t chase after me you wouldn’t have gotten sick. Pabo’ I clicked my tongue 

‘If I hadn’t run away, you wouldn’t have gotten sick chasing after me’ I placed my hand on top of hers as I looked at her sleeping face. 

“I’m sorry for getting you sick, I’m sorry for hurting you, I’m sorry for pushing you away,” My hand clenched as my feelings came flooding out “I never wanted to push you away, I missed talking to you every day, calling you, checking up on you,” I gritted my teeth hesitant to say what I really wanted to say “I- I really struggled when-,” I felt her flinch in her sleep as she started to wake up

I quickly moved my hand away from hers and stood up from my seat. I got myself ready to leave but Sana was quick to grab my wrist before I could leave. She tightened her grip around my wrist as she tugged on my hand. I turned to face the sick faced girl whose eyes were barely open with a small frown on her face. She tugged on my hand again. 

“Please don’t go, stay with me” 

With her request, my cold and stern facade faded away as I sat back down beside her bed. She closed her eyes and went back to sleep. I stayed watching her changing the towel on her forehead occasionally replenishing the bucket with new water. It was already afternoon and I’m sure when she wakes up she would like something to eat. I got up from my seat and headed towards their kitchen. Mina had left a note on the fridge saying that Momo and her went out together and to take care of Sana. I looked around the cabinets for nothing but junk food and snacks. I sighed at the little assortment of food the girls had. I found a pack of ramen and started to cook it.  

As I waited for the ramen to finish cooking, I felt a pair of warm hands wrap around my waist. I jumped in surprise as Sana giggled into my neck. Her warm breath tickled my breath. 

My heart raced she pulled me closer to her chest pressed tightly on my back while her arms wrapped around my waist. I prayed to GodJihyo that she couldn’t hear my heart racing in my chest. 

“Thank you for taking care of me Chaeyoung” she laid her head on my shoulder not letting go of the hug 

Sana took in Chaeyoung’s scent as the younger stood still letting the older hug her. Sana could hear Chaeyoung’s heartbeat race as it made her race. Sana’s cheeks blushed red at seeing Chaeyoung’s soft side. It was a nice change from her cold self that she put up. But she knew deep down the Chaeyoung she knew when they were kids is still in there. Sana snuggled closer into Chaeyoung as the younger reached for plates placing the food in them. Chaeyoung moved to the table as Sana continued to cling onto her from behind. 

I placed the food on the table, “Are you going to cling onto me all day or are you going to eat?” 

Sana loosened her grip as she dragged her feet taking a seat in front of Chaeyoung. Sana picked up her chopsticks while eating ramen watching Chaeyoung intently as she ate hers. They ate in silence but it wasn’t the usual awkward atmosphere there were surrounded by. It was a comfortable one as they enjoyed each other’s presence eating together. I took their plates washing them in the sink. 

“Are you feeling better now?” 

“Yes! Especially after you took care of me” She beamed as she wrapped herself around me again 

I didn’t resist and just let Sana hug me as we sat together on the couch. “Chaeyoung I want to go to the park” 

“Okay, go wash up first” 

After a few minutes, Sana came out of her room in clothes ready for their outing. I was leaning on the doorway scrolling on her phone waiting for Sana. I looked up from her phone and saw Sana her breath taken away. This is my first time seeing her in casual clothes. She looked mature and feminine; wearing a light brown cardigan with a white blouse and black jeans. Her beautifully soft, limpid brown eyes sparkled with bliss when she smiled at me. Sana took my hand leading me out of the apartment and towards the park.

They arrived at the park and were sitting on a bench watching the little kids play on the playground. 

“I can’t believe that it’s been five years”

“Yeah, we were really small back then” 

“You’re still small Chaeyoung” she joked teasingly and I could only roll my eyes at her comment

Sana’s eyes were taken away when the sound of a small ring coming from a bell. Her eyes followed the bikers as she wanted to ride a bike. She tugged at my arm like a kid wanting to buy a toy. She pointed at the bike her eyes sparkled at the sight “I want to ride a bike”  

“Before I left, you still couldn’t ride a bike”

“It’s okay I’ll just ride on the back while you bike” 

“What? That doesn’t sound safe no way” 

I tried to put up a strong front, but it melted instantly as Sana pouted with her puppy eyes eager to ride a bike. I ran my fingers through my hair in defeat “Fine, stop pouting it’s not cute” 

I swiftly stood up from the bench leaving Sana behind as I stomped towards the rental bikes. I paid for the bike taking it off the rack swinging my leg over the bike hoping on the seat. Sana followed behind and took a seat on the back of the bike. 

“Are you sure this is safe?” 

“Yeah, we did this all the time when we were kids” 

I scolded myself in my head we shouldn’t do this we aren’t kids anymore. What if she gets hurt she is still sick? Sana wrapped her arms around my waist. She shook her head of its thoughts and took off on the bike. Finding her balance we went at a steady pace biking around the streets. Sana held on tighter to me as I picked up the speed. A smile crept on my face as she dug her head into my back. I could feel my cheeks blush but I kept my head fixated on the road not wanting to crash. 

I biked towards the riverside the scenery whizzing by us in blurry lines. The wind-cold on our skin as our hair waved in the wind. I stopped by a bridge on the riverside putting my foot down. I got off the bike first then helped Sana off. I placed the bike on the floor. Sana immediately took my hand and pulled me towards the bridge. She looked down at the water then back to me. Her face shined so perfectly as the sunset rays hit her face. Her eyes staring into mine. We weren’t saying anything but her eyes telling me everything I needed to know. Her lips bear a resemblance of a smile, just enough to show her enjoying this moment. 

“Let’s make a wish” 

“What are we 10?” 

“Here take this and toss it into the water,” She handed me a coin 

She held onto a coin tightly in her hand ‘I wish for Chaeyoung to open up to me’ she wished before tossing the coin into the water

“What was your wish?” 

“It’s a secret,” Sana winked “your turn” 

I reluctantly looked down at the coin that rested in her palm before clenching her fist 

‘I wish for you to notice me’ she wished before throwing the coin into the water

“Chaeyoung give me your phone?”
 

“No” 

“Why not? I won’t do anything,” Sana pouted as she kept tugging at my arm
 

“Fine” I let out a heavy sigh as I handed her my phone

She let out a small laugh “You only have four contacts on your phone?” before punching something on my phone

“I don’t need more,” I said defensively taking back my phone from her. I looked down at my phone screen she had added herself on my contact list.
 

“Feel free to call me whenever,” She held up a peace sign before dragging me along the riverside

We spent the rest of the evening at the riverside looking out at the sunset. The river had shown the first signs of ice but where it flowed free it reflected the bands of red and black that rippled in the wintry wind. Above the sky was ablaze with fiery rich colors with the sun setting in the horizon. But for all its brilliant flame and warm rays the air remained frigid with a hint of snow to come. We exchanged casual conversation catching up with each other. A lot of things have happened in 5 years. How Sana met Mina and Momo, her struggles and wishes. However, I didn’t really share what happened to me during the 5 years I was gone. If needed I would only tell irrelevant stories and just let Sana blabber on as I listened intently to her stories. 

“Chaeyoung I forgive you” Sana faced me I could see the change of facial expression as her gentle smile turned into a shaky one 

“For what?”

“Nothing, I just want you to know that I forgive you” 

‘What does that mean? Was there a hidden message behind that?’ I decided it would be best to not push on the subject. I sighed focusing my gaze on the horizon. ‘Whatever it is, I know she has good intentions, that’s how you’ve always been’ 

 “Chaeyoung I hope you will show this side more,” Sana laid her head on my shoulder “You don’t have to act tough I know you Chaeyoung, I know how sweet and caring you are. I hope you can open up to me” 

‘But you don’t, I want to tell you everything but I can’t’

I hummed in response to Sana. Laying my head on top of her’s both gazing at the setting sun on the horizon.