A friendship with feelings involved is very hard. There are times you find yourself verging so close to the breaking point. Then there are times when you are ready to throw hands around the other. It’s extremely tough not to just strangle your friend who sits in front of you bragging about his relationship with your crush.

It’s tough being in a friendship with feelings involved, especially if they are feelings of hidden rivalry.

Sana, was always the centre of this silent war. No one denied it but we both hated each other. He is undeserving of her, Mark. But it’s wrong to say that I am. His remarks were always wrong and drove me to the edge, but I couldn’t defend Sana. You see I wasn’t on the couple side; he was.

“Hey Tzuyu, lend me a pen please?”

It was the same voice which Mark always referred to as shrill and painful to his ears. It wasn’t though, her voice was indeed loud but it could be gentle at times when she wanted it to be. Her voice was comforting and had a cute sound to it but was also followed by seductive tone. Weird but not painful.

“Clingy”, he said.

“Sweet.” I thought.

“Possessive”, he said.

“Insecure”, I thought.

Our ideas never matched. He took her habits negatively and always was after changing her. Never could I have thought he’d date her. He seemed to dislike everything about her but well isn’t this little full of surprises.

Since the first day of dating, Mark had made it his duty to come back to our shared dorm room and explain to me every details of their date. And every day, I’d sit there and curse myself for having to approached him first in the cafeteria.

He knew about my feelings for Sana. There was no doubt that he knew. It wasn’t his huge smirk that he had on that gave this information away. As it was I, me, myself who had informed him about my miserable feelings.

It’s suspicious how he never failed to explain to me each date that he had with her. The details that he emphasised on triggered me and he