How could I even say that I like him in that kind of way. He must have been so shocked. Then again when I saw Yeonmi I could feel my heart breaking into thousand tiny pieces.
How could she demand Joon Myeon to go back to her. She left him so why does she even want him back.
And that fool… why can’t he be more clear about her, is it so hard to say he’s not in love with her so there’s no way he’d be with her again. His attitude only makes it seem as if he’s with me only for our child.

I sighed, staring back at the building of his house. All lights of the house on the fourth floor were turned off, except from that one, where Joon Myeon was probably thinking of how to deal with this.
Some part of me wishes he had followed me, told me that he too had feelings for me.
How I wish this actually happened.

What do I even say from now on, do I pretend this never happened, just the same way we pretended back then. Then again I could just demand an answer from him, but how much truth would his words hold. After all I was pregnant to his baby, he would never want to sadden me.
… this is so embarrassing.

I had been walking for a while, so much actually that I had reached a park near the house. In front of me was a small pond on it’s center. Once I found a bench I sat down and though back to all the things said between us.
It was getting cold, thank God I had my coat but my feet were freezing. I had left the house wearing my slippers and now I couldn’t even feel my feet. How the heck can I not be this careful with myself damn it…

I wanted to cry at that moment, all of my feelings had gathered inside me and it was time I had my explosion.

“Why are you crying here in this kind of cold, are you crazy?” I looked at the man sitting beside me. He was pretty familiar despite him wearing a coat over his head.
The Time Controller really knew to appear at the most unpleasant moments.

“Go away you oldie. I’m in no mood to have you criticize me” I wiped my tears away not wanting to see anyone at that particular moment and especially not this man. It only reminds me of my multiple failures in all of my lives.

“Why, what happened?” he got up and stood right in front of me a worried look on his face, as if he actually cared about me.
That’s why I just looked at him and told him everything that had happened.
Every word I spoke to him.

“So I confessed. I didn’t want him going back to that woman.”

“You’ve really done good” I raised an eyebrow at him and he continued “Come on, I already told you to claim what is yours and this is a solid beginning. How else do you expect him to know you two are meant to be?” In a way he was right, so much in fact I didn’t want to admit it.
I had to let Joon Myeon know about my feelings for him, but all this situations is too much for me. How did my past lives even manage to keep him with them.
I must really be lacking a lot of things.

“It’s embarrassing, how am I going to even face him?” He sighed and walked around in circles.

“You know well that in all of your lives he was strongly in love with you. I still don’t understand how he’s so different. Or maybe…” he stopped walking a bright smile on his face, as if he knew things that no man knew, which was true in a way.
“Eun Bi, I think he actually has feelings for you.” I shook my head.

“He would have told me something, wouldn’t he” he sighed once more.

“You know what? For now it’s best you don’t overexert yourself, we wouldn’t want history to repeat itself.” History repeating over and over.
Memories from my second life came back, I wiped the tears forming in my eyes and just looked around to forget all the bad things.

“Hey you know me and Joonmyeon are actually getting married, will you come to see me?” he smiled and sat beside me, his hand on my shoulder.

“Of course I will. Haven’t I always been beside you?” the Time Controller is right. He has always been with me, in good times and in bad times always guiding me whenever I needed help.
Although he’s not my family, as long as I remember him, he’ll always be a father figure.

Actually this is the saddest part about succeeding, we all forget the Time Controller, the man who is beside us for more than anyone else.
I wonder, how does he feel when he sees us but we don’t?

“Eun Bi.” he called my name having my full attention he pointed behind me “I think he does have feelings about you” I followed the direction he pointed at, only to find Joon Myeon running towards me.
I turned to look at the Time Controller but he had disappeared into his gold dust.

I turned to look back at Joon Myeon, he was breathing heavily as if he had run for hours.

“Why did you leave like this?” I didn’t know what to say. So I just looked at his eyes. They were telling me things he wanted to say instead. He was worried about me, but he wanted to pretend nothing happened.

“I needed some air. How did you even find me?”

“I saw which direction you went from the window so I just followed you.” I scoffed. I loved him so much yet he never failed to make me angry at the same time. 
In fact it made me angry that he really