“Oh, you guys just got here?”

Turning his head in an instant, as if he had just heard the angel’s voice, Kyungsoo met eyes with Yerin who was now striding to them. He couldn’t even hear Inyoung telling her mommy that they had dinner before driving home, basically explaining on behalf of him about why they just got to the apartment. He’s always been a master in hiding everything inside of him but if he were to be honest, every time he meets eyes with her or just merely have her existence close by, his heart skips a beat, or probably a thousand more after that. She’s beautiful in her formal work clothes, she’s always been beautiful in his eyes, that’s one thing that he plans to keep to himself forever – as much as he hates it.

Her ponytail is loose and pieces of hair falls finely around her face and at the back of her neck. Kyungsoo felt very tempted to push them behind her ear but that thought disappeared as soon as his eyes focused back on how red her face was, specifically her eyes and nose. “D-did you cry?” He couldn’t help but ask, keeping a monotone despite the increasing concern within himself. “Oh my god, no. I think it’s just allergies, it came out of nowhere.” Her nasal voice confirmed her answer almost immediately. She started talking to Inyoung about her day while opening the front door with her keys. Kyungsoo just stood behind; thoughts and possible caring sentences circling his mind but none of them would actually tumble out of his mouth, he knew for a fact.

He has never taken care of her while she’s sick. Not ever. Today, it’s just allergies but usually, it keeps her all night so he’s still worried.

Every time she is sick, he wishes he could just put their situation aside for a moment and just be there for her. So badly. He wants to do so many things but he’s afraid that it’s going to be ‘too weird’ or ‘awkward’ when he has made things clear between them years ago. “Hello? Are you coming in or you need to go?” Yerin’s question interrupted his deep thoughts. “No, I should get going. I got a call from work. I need to go back.” His respond formed with hesitation despite that he was telling the truth. He got called on the way here. “Oh, okay.” Yerin glanced down to Inyoung and her hair. “Baby, say bye to your Appa.” She instructed the kid who gladly did so and hugged Kyungsoo around the hips.

“I’m so happy to see you today, Appa!”

“Me too, sweetie.” Kyungsoo bends down to plant a lingered kiss on the kid’s head before standing up straight again to look at Yerin. He wanted to give a get-well-soon message to her but he held it in. “Just in that’s not an allergy and you’re actually getting sick, don’t let Inyoung catch it, you know how bad she gets sick.” He warned instead earning a quick nod from the woman. After bidding her father a goodbye, Inyoung ran into the apartment to play. Yerin on the other hand held onto the door, still waiting for Kyungsoo to actually walk away after she had said goodbye. “What?” She decided to asked since he hasn’t moved an inch yet.

“Do you have a date this Saturday?”

Yerin’s chest pounded at the sudden question. “Hu—W-why?” She stammered a one-word sentence, weirdly enough. Kyungsoo adjusted his suit while clearing his throat. “No, just—I’m wondering if I could take Inyoung for a couple of hours. I’m looking for a new place where we could stay on our weekends, probably somewhere that’s a little bit away from the busy areas and maybe a real house would be better.” He informed in detail. “Oh, nice. Well, Baekhyun’s going to be here for the tutoring but I guess you could take her after. But what does that have to do with me having a date or not though? You’re taking her, not me.” Yerin asked back in complete confusion. Kyungsoo was actually just curious and he really wanted to know, she hasn’t told him about any dates lately so he was starting to get worried that she finally found someone good and kept it from him. His already troubled mind got even more troubled by the mention of this teacher’s name whom he just had a small ‘feud’ with earlier, the guy didn’t really fight back but it was still a feud for him.

“Don’t worry, you can go on a date with that teacher when I take Inyoung. Isn’t that just perfect?” He blurts out, tension rising in his chest. “That’s what I was wondering ‘cause you probably do that with him all the time after every tutor.” He planned to keep the last sentence in his head but failed to do so earning a face full of disbelief from the lady, making the tension between them grow even worse.

She looked away while massaging her throbbing head. “Oh my god, are we going to do this right now?” Her voice was tired and upset. “Whatever. I don’t care.” Kyungsoo grunted before finally walking away. Yerin breathed in, a heavy one, before making an attempt to explain. “Kyu—why do you always walk out like this without hearing me out? No, I’m not going out with him and what is it even to you even if I do, huh?” She asked in frustration. Kyungsoo’s heart crushed as her voice got farther and farther away. He wanted to hear more assurance, he wanted to hear that there was never going to be anything between Yerin and Baekhyun but he was afraid, especially from her last add-on question at the end.

“You’re unbelievable.” It was the last thing he heard her say before the loud thud the door created when it closed. He got into the elevator and instantly, his body felt weak and his back landed on the mirrored wall. Fights after fights. That’s all he can do to interact with her longer, other ways aside from picking up fights would show too much of his real emotions that he’s been trying to hide for the longest time. He’s afraid to even be in good terms with her because he knows it will only make him fall for her even more. For him, keeping this cold tension between them will maintain the distance he has built, like a wall.

The wall that is always on the verge of breaking just by the mere thought of her.

He loved her, he still loves her and he will always love her. That is his biggest problem. By now, he expects to feel okay with the thought of Yerin dating someone else but so far, he hasn’t done a very good job at being okay with that. She has every right to do so, she has every right to be happy and fall in love – happiness and love – the two simple things he can’t even give her. He knows he’s being selfish by being so difficult every time seeing other people comes up as their topic of conversation, but he couldn’t help it.

After getting into his car, he gave in and phoned her. “Hello.”

Her voice was muffled, he immediately caught on it though,