Dongho stayed in the same position all night, slumped in a chair at the table. As the sun came up, outside stayed dark as the storm hadn't gone away. The thunder and lightening were continuing their assault, rattling the windows, but still, Dongho paid no attention.

When a knock came at the door, Dongho finally looked up, standing on weak legs to carry him to the door. It was another police officer. In a flurry of words and suggestions, the only thing Dongho could understand was the fact that he couldn't stay here, in the only home he had known for most of his life. But, was it ever a home?

Homes were supposed to be warm, and happy, the only thing Dongho ever felt in this poor excuse for a home was cold and misery. Maybe it was a good thing he was leaving. But, where would he go? He had no family left, no friends willing to take him in. Nothing.

Dongho stiffly accepted the pamphlet the officer gave him, nodding without hearing what he had said, and shut the door as he began to walk away. Looking at it briefly, Dongho could tell that it was information on some sort of home. He leaned against the door frame and sunk down to the floor, knees tucked under his chin. Would he be safe there? What was this place, really? Was it somewhere he could live and try to be happy?

With an unbearable weight in his chest, Dongho looked towards the only picture that hung on their walls. It was him and his mother, smiling. It was before their grandma died and all their problems began. Now that his mother was gone, would he have to take on even more problems? Dongho didn't know how he was expected to survive if he had to go through anything more.

He stared at his mother, silently asking her why she had taken her own life. He could understand, though, feeling as if there was no other way out, no other way to escape the pain. Dongho had thought of that solution multiple times, but he was too afraid to do it, of course.

He had realized before, but he was damned.

His eyes rested at the hollow of his mother's throat, where a small gold cross laid. He remembered her cherishing that thing, it was a present from her father when she was young. He also remembered the pain on her face when they had to sell it. Through it all, did his mother still believe in God? Did she believe he was just testing her? Did she still pray?

Dongho suddenly thought of those nights when she would come home and curl up next to him, she would always sing a song, waking Dongho halfway. He remembered it to be a church hymn, and then she'd close her eyes, mouth still moving in a silent mantra. Was it a prayer? Did she still have faith even when everything felt like it was working against her?

Tears fell from his eyes at the thought. Praying, what was the point? A lot of good it did her. Dongho tried to stand, but his weak limbs couldn't support him and he fell to his hands and knees, tears splashing onto the floor.

“Please, please, God, if you're up there.” Dongho began, his last resort, his only lifeline, was to pray. “Please, I need your help. I don't know what to do-” Dongho coughed, fingernails digging into the wood. Dongho felt like he was going to puke, “Please...please. I need you. I know I haven't had faith in you recently, but now...now I need some sort of proof to believe in you. You're all I have right now. So...please.”

With more coughs and pants, Dongho rested his feverish forehead on the cold wood of the floor, “Please...” He whimpered before his body shut down and he out.

….

When Dongho opened his eyes again, the pain was still settled into his chest but now it had spread to his lungs and limbs, enclosing his whole body. He sat up, holding his splitting head. His eyes first landed on the window, noticing the storm had gone away and the thick frost on the window indicated a dramatic temperature drop. And, that's when his eyes landed on the paper laying next to the table leg.

He crawled over, picking it up with stiff and shaky fingers. He unfolded the worn paper and felt more tears burn in his throat. A picture of him fell into his lap, but he didn't care about that. What he cared about was his mother's messy scroll on the paper.

My precious Angel,

I guess I can no longer call you doughy, though. You've grown so much, and it makes me happy that through this tough life, you've managed to stay as innocent, and you always look after me. I don't think I've ever thanked you for that. I'm sorry, Dongho, but there are things no one could have protected me from. Don't blame yourself for my decision, son, I did this because I have nothing to live for. Even though I love you more than words can describe, more than you could probably comprehend, there was a point when not even you could make me see the good things in life.

I know what our situation has done to you, Dongho, and it breaks my heart more and more each day when I see how tired and exhausted you've become. I never wanted this for us, you have to understand, but time and circumstance have made us the way we are. My only hope is that now you can be taken from all this, and finally live a life where you're not afraid, you're not starving, and most of all, I want you to be happy.

I know your life will never be completely normal, especially not now, but, even in the most abnormal of situations, happiness can grow. I was happy when I was with you Dongho, every night when I held you in my arms, I was happy. Because I had made and raised someone so precious. Never believe that you're not good, Dongho, because I know your heart. And all you want to do is help in any way you can. Never believe that it isn't good to do anything for the people you love.

I'm sorry, Dongho, I truly am. For leaving you alone like this, but I have faith that you'll be able to go to someplace safe, now. Someplace that you don't have to hurt, someplace I have always wanted you to be.

I'll watch over you, my precious son. I'll never leave you, not really.

There was no signature, just an ink blot where Dongho suspected the pen tip broke due to the pressure she placed on it. The whole paper was littered with spots where the ink had run as her tears fell onto the words. Dongho held the paper tightly, letting his own tears splash onto its surface. “Mom...” Dongho cried, “I love you, mom.”

After he calmed himself down enough to stand, Dongho picked up the paper the policeman had given him earlier, he briefly remembered him saying something about assistance and short term residence. Even though, technically, Dongho could live on his own, he knew it was impossible. He didn't have the means to do something like that, not to mention the courage.

If Dongho had been scared before, it was nothing compared to now, knowing how absolutely alone he had suddenly become. If his mother couldn't do it, how was Dongho supposed to live? Was the world so horrible, and damaging that no one was supposed to go through it completely intact? Was there some way he could possibly shield himself from some of the damage? What was he supposed to do?

Hands shaking, and feeling incredibly venerable, Dongho made his way out the door, wrapping his thin cotton coat around his thin body. The cold was harsh and unforgiving, causing Dongho to quake at even the smallest of breezes. He couldn't help but hope that, maybe, another snow would fall, encasing the world and making it new again.

By the looks of the sky, Dongho saw, it just might snow again.

Coming to the address on the pamphlet, Dongho examined the grounds, it looked like an old school, but restored. It seemed to fit, Dongho enjoyed escaping to school after all, hadn't he? He walked the long entrance way, up the concrete steps, and opened the large doors. He looked around, he could see kids roaming about, playing around as it was too cold to do so outside. Some looked at him and smiled softly.

A new arrival.

Dongho knit his eyebrows together, feeling unsure. What was he supposed to do here? Would he have to live with all these kids? Would he be allowed to still attend school and do after school activities? Would he have a curfew?

Dongho never had a curfew before, he thought with longing. Curfews were something so completely normal, he had never had normal. But he wanted it so much it ached.

“Hello, are you looking for someone?” A soft female voice asked from behind him, startling Dongho.

“U-uhm, yes. I need...a place to stay...” Dongho bowed, suddenly ashamed in front this beautiful woman.

“Oh, then you must come with me.” She smiled. Dongho nodded and shuffled after her.

They passed rooms, former classrooms, and Dongho saw glances of sleeping forms. Some children, some his age. Were there really so many orphans and people just like him? He really wasn't alone. Never before had he felt something to be so completely true before. As they headed to what Dongho assumed to be the old main office of the school, he grew nervous.

What if he wasn't allowed here?

“Shin?” The woman knocked lightly on the open office door, “we have a young man to see you.” Shin looked up from some paper work and smiled. Dongho's eyes widened, no one ever seemed so happy to see him, yet at the same time, Dongho sensed a deep sadness in Shin's eyes.

“Hello, sir, I'm Shin Dongho.” Dongho bowed low.

“Please, just call me Shin.” Shin stood to shake Dongho's hand. Dongho's beautiful slipped from the room as Shin beckoned Dongho to a chair. As Shin sat down, he sighed, “So...Dongho...what brings you here?”

Dongho twisted his hands together in his lap, looking at his digits. He had to tell the man, otherwise he would be turned away, right? As Shin reassured Dongho he could take his time, Dongho closed his eyes and suddenly, his mouth began moving. It spoke on its own of everything he had gone through, his feelings, his thoughts, his loneliness, everything. Even the things Dongho hadn't ever told anyone else, stuff he hadn't realized himself.

By the middle, he had tears streaming down his face, and by the end he was sobbing so hard he wasn't sure he was understandable. “So, please...please, I need help.” Dongho finished, not having looked at Shin once.

“You are always welcome here, Dongho.” Shin choked out. Having listened to the whole story of Dongho's life, he couldn't hold back the tears that filled his eyes, “We will help you.”

Dongho felt so relieved, he began crying even harder. “Thank you, thank you so much, sir.” Shin moved from the other side of his desk to sit beside Dongho and comfort him, just a few simple pats on the back, Dongho doubled over, trying to ease some of the pain in his chest, which seemed to seep away slowly as he cried, knowing he was safe now.

Once he calmed down enough to breathe normally and talk, Shin began explaining what he would need to do to stay here. Just some paperwork, and then the rules. No contact exchange, no bullying, no stealing, physical fighting, words were okay, as long as they weren't put downs because letting out yours feelings was normal and healthy. It was the normal kind of thing, the things you would expect to be the rules at a school.

Shin explained the kids who lived here all came from different backgrounds and situations. Some had mental disorders, some were abused, abandoned, most needed therapy, which was provided by the institution if needed. Dongho only had to ask if he wanted to talk to a therapist. Shin explained that there were schedules, set times for homework, meals, showers, all that, and yes, even a curfew.

He would still be allowed to attend his normal school, of course, and would still be allowed any after school activities, even the tutoring Dongho had taken up. He was allowed to keep his part time job, even. But, Shin mentioned, not everyone were allowed the same privileges, as some of the kids needed special attentions. Shin mentioned a girl who therapy, special meals, and constant monitoring, though he didn't reveal what mental disorder she was suffering from.

Dongho nodded and soaked everything in. Though he thought it would be a pain to even be told when he was supposed to shower, he knew it was better than the Hell he would face if he hadn't come. He felt so relieved, so unburdened, for the first time in a long time he couldn't help but think that maybe this was a fresh start.

“Go grab anything you need from your house, clothes, books, schoolwork, if you need any help, just come back, and I'll get a few people to help you.”

“It's okay, I don't have much, really.” Dongho said, eyes red and voice scratchy.

As he made his way back through the corridors, he looked around, something strange growing in his chest. Something that felt like... home? Warmth flooded through his body, and he realized that for so long, so, so long, he had been cold and dead inside that this strange sensation of being home startled him.

As the doors closed behind him, Dongho realized that it had began to snow like he thought it would. Though the sky had looked dreary before, it was suddenly bright, and shining white. The snow fell gently around him, and he closed his eyes, tilting his face up towards the sky. Before he even realized, a small smile was making its way onto his lips as, despite the snow, the warmth he felt increased to a gentle burn.

He could swear he felt arms wrapped tightly around him, but as he opened his eyes and no one was there, he knew he had been mistaken.

I kind of wish Kiseop's chapters were next, I had the best sudden burst of inspiration for them after listening to Evanescence 'Tourniquet'.

See what kind of music I have to listen to in order to write this story? All depressing emo stuff I used to listen to. *goes to iTunes and puts on KPop*

Anyway, Kevin's is next, I might have to do a tiny bit of research for his part, so, though it won't be terribly long, I might take a moment on the next update. ^-^ Please look forward to it.