After our island trip, all of us caught cold except Sehun who seems very proud of this fact. “A proof that I’m more well-adjusted to this place than my groupmates.” he declares during a breakfast, responded by Grandma and Grandpa’s adoring chuckle while Yumi, Jinho and I struggle to breathe with our red noses.

          I’m reaching for salt when Sehun also does the same thing, and our hands touch. He takes the salt, and gives it to me first. After the trip, I think we both acted like nothing really happened. Not like something happened either though.

          I think Yumi and Jinho didn’t see the scene of me leaning to Sehun’s shoulder during my sleep because if they did, they would have teased me to no end. But they said nothing, so I guess it’s a good thing.

          It also removes some weight off of my head because it’s been bothering me since. How did I let myself off guard? Why did he do that to me?

          “Nana is spacing out.” Sehun sings, and I’m awake from my thoughts. I shoot him my best laser eyes, and the others laugh. They’re completely used to us bickering like this.

          Days pass and it’s already one day before we leave the village. We don’t have much to do today other than packing, and we plan to visit the neighbors later this afternoon. Grandma informs us to go to the village chief’s house for lunch as he wants to meet us for the last time.

          We’re going to the chief’s house with slow speed, recording the houses, streets, trees, and views for the last time. We’re bringing a framed photo of us and the residents during a village meeting two weeks ago to be given to the chief. We also prepared the ones we took with Grandma, Grandpa and Uncle Yong. We also printed photos of the four of us, to be kept personally.

          We arrive at the house and are confused to see a lot of footwears in front of the entrance, also energetic noises from the house. We peek inside, and see probably half of the whole village squeezing inside the living room of the house.

          “Oh, here are our main characters!” the chief beams to see us, and the others cheer. We thought it was just going to be a relaxed lunch, but with all these people, it turned to be a festival. After eating, we all sit on the floor and the chief relays his gratitude to us and the projects we made. He tells us to come visit anytime, and to call them often.

          Yumi is already a teary mess when we say our final greetings to the residents, and Hyunwoo the energetic kid from kindergarten can’t leave Sehun and me the entire time. He ends up crying when his parents ask him to go home, and we promise to video call him later after we go back to Seoul.

          The residents start to go home, leaving us, Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Yong, the chief and his wife.

          “Aigoo, my babies are leaving too soon.” Grandma softly says with a longing smile on her face. “Can’t you stay a bit longer?”

          Yumi starts sobbing not long after, and we both hug Grandma. I start to feel something on my throat. Hold it in, Nana, hold it in…

          Grandma also sheds some tears, recalling how we remind her of her grandchildren, how we love everything she cooks us but complain on how late we wake up on weekends. Uncle Yong also chirps in, saying the boys sometimes are so messy with their laundry. It’s a tears and laughs filled room at the same time,

          “Promise me to continue being such healthy and lovely kids. Continue your study well, and always be happy. Come see us if you have the time, we’ll always be ready.” Grandpa says sincerely.

          I almost lose myself on this point. I grit my teeth hard, trying to suppress my feelings. No, Nana, don’t cry.

          The room goes silent, and we start scattering here and there in the house. My eyes feel hot, and I think I need to be away from this place.

          “Um—can I go home first? I haven’t done packing.” I say to Yumi. It’s a lame excuse, but I think it’s quite feasible.

          “Oh, now? Let’s just go together!” Yumi whines.

          “It’s okay, I’ll go by myself for now.” I stand up, and without waiting for her response I go out to leave.

          I meet Sehun on the porch, and he looks at me questionably as I wear my shoes. “Where are you going?”

          “Home, haven’t done packing.” I answer a bit too brightly. I hurriedly go, and leave the chief’s house.

          My chest hurts as I walk, and tears start b on my eyes as my lips tremble. I need to be alone stat. I speed up towards the house, and lock myself in the bathroom. I sit above the toilet lid and cover my face with my hands.

          I burst into tears, letting out the clogged emotions I’ve held until now. I might not look like it, but I find it hard to face reality that I’m leaving this village and its warmth really soon. All the places, the people, the memories…

          I hate to show myself crying to other people, and I spend a good five minutes crying to my heart’s content inside this bathroom. Yumi and the others can come anytime, I need to at least be in my room when they arrive.

          I exit the bathroom, and see a pair of legs a few feet in front of me. Sehun is standing next to the table in the dining room, and he looks a bit taken aback to see me in this state. He’s not saying anything, but keeps a close eye on me. I decide I need to walk away fast, and starts moving with my eyes fixed to the floor.

          I stumble near the kitchen sink, and Sehun rushes to my side. “Are you okay?”

          My head is dizzy, and I can’t react. I let out a slow ‘yeah’ and try to walk but I can’t move.

          I end up crying again with my head down, and I’m so embarrassed to have Sehun face me in this condition. At least the others are not here… It’ll be just better if no one sees at all.

          Sehun puts one hand to the back of my head, and pulls me towards him. “Aigoo, there, there.” he pats my hair repeatedly. That makes me cry harder instead, and I realize I might make his shirt wet with my tears but I don’t seem to care about it right now.

          “Don’t cry, Shin Nana is strong.” he says softly as he slips a laugh. After some time my heart starts to feel at ease. He takes a step back, and meets my eye level. He grabs a few sheets of tissue from the table and helps me wipe my face without a word.

          “Are—are Yumi and Jinho here?” I ask between my tears.

          “No, they’re still walking.” Sehun says, assuring me. “Feeling better?”

          I hesitantly nod. Sehun scans me for a second, then heads to the door. “I’ll stall them before they enter.”

          I sniff, and see Sehun going out. I look at his back, with a slew of things starts floating on my mind.

*

          That night after dinner, Sehun and Jinho is doing final checks with us before going back to Uncle Yong’s house. “I’ve reserved tickets for the three us, we’re going to be ready at the train station at 9 AM.” Jinho says, checking his phone.

          “Three?” Yumi furrows her brows.

          “Ah right, I’m not going back together to Seoul with you guys.” Sehun announces.

          “Oh?” that escapes my lips, and Sehun turns to see me.

          “Yeah, I’m going to Chuncheon to visit my family.”

          I slowly nod. He’s not going with us apparently… I blink twice, trying to keep a straight face. Why do I feel slightly disappointed?

          “Don’t get too upset, we’ll meet at school.” Sehun says, looking at me. I throw him a towel I was folding, and he catches it in time. Yumi snickers like a proud mother, and Jinho shakes his head. “Yeah, it’s better this way, unless we want a fight to break down in the train.”

          The next morning, we’re finally leaving the village. Grandma and Grandpa is also coming with us to the train station, with a car driven by Mr. Kim, a close neighbor.

          Sehun’s train is arriving half an hour after ours, but he isn’t entering the boarding lounge with us so he could talk a bit longer with Uncle Yong and the others who brought us here. I’m silently observing as I see Yumi cries in Grandma’s embrace, and I get my own turn of hug. “Sweet, sweet Nana. Grandma loves you. Come visit anytime.”

          I bite the insides of my lips, and force myself to smile. I look down to the ground, and someone touches my shoulders.

          Sehun offers a high-five, and I accept it with a smile. “See you later.” he says as he shakes my hand in the air for a few seconds. I nod, and the three of us go to board the train.

          I’m getting on the train with heavy steps. Yumi sits beside me, and I look at her vacantly. “Why are you here? Aren't you sitting with Jinho?” I mutter jokingly.

          “In case you feel lonely.” she says, and puts her head on my shoulder. I scoff, and shake my head while Jinho laughs across our seats. The train starts moving and it starts to really get on me that I’m leaving. I look through the window, seeing the passing rice fields and trees outside. I’m going to miss this view. I’m going to miss the life I’ve had for this past month.

          I close my eyes, and for some reason there’s someone’s face I see in this darkness.