Dear Diary,                                                       

Date: Tuesday, August 6th, 2019

     Hi, I can't say I'm used to this.. Writing my feelings in a journal and all. Seems pretty cheesy. But I have come to realize that I can't keep these feelings in my chest anymore. For a while I have tried to ignore them, and for a while it has worked. For a while I tried speaking to friends, some that no longer speak to me the way they used to, and some that have just completely distanced themselves from me for reasons unknown. So technically... I have no one to talk to. See I am a very anti-social person. Not to a point where I'm rude of course, but I tend to nit pick on the friends I make. Who I can trust can be counted on only one hand, and even then thats too high of a number. But I am capable of starting conversations with others easily. Of course, the topics are never anything serious. 

      So here I sit, ready to start from the beginning, to start from where it all started. I sit here ready to write down how this person has become for whatever reason, be it fate, coincidence, or just a cruel bittersweet occurance, such an important individual to me. My question here is, will you be interested enough to listen? Or will you also abandon me like my friends have done? 

      I guess I have no choice but to see the outcome. At the very least, my story gets told, the weight will be off my shoulders. Who knows? Maybe I'll feel better, and maybe, just maybe... I'll be able to help someone in my similar situation. Join me on this whirlwind of emotions. Of this--sadly--one sided love story. Bear with me though, this one goes deep. Without ever really hitting the bottom. And maybe in the end, I'll find a way to cut our red string.