⚠️ WARNING ⚠️

THE STORY IM ABOUT TO TELL IS JUST A JOKE AND IT’S REALLY DUMB…I WROTE THIS ABOUT A YEAR AGO FOR MY FRIENDS WHO ARE THIRSTY FANGIRLS. PROCEED WITH CAUTION. YOU. HAVE. BEEN. WARNED.

Once upon a time, there lived 7 different men. No, not men, ing little s who like to ruin people’s(mostly ARMY) lives. Anywho, the seven boys names were Seokjin(aka Jin), Yoongi(aka Suga), Namjoon(aka RM), Hoseok(aka j-hope), Jimin(aka Chimmi), Taehyung(aka V), and finally Jungkook(aka Kookie).

Jin~

* Oldest

* Can cook

* Is a mom

* Worldwide handsome

* Face of a ing god

* Deserves better

Suga~

* Acts all tough but is a soft little

* Sleepy grandpa

* When active you better watch the out bcs this man will rap, dance, and sing circles around you

* Hot guy who can play piano

RM~

* Smart little er

* The definition of daddy

* Would be the one that if you are at dinner with your parents and you say “daddy can you pass me ______” he would give you it not realizing you are talking to you dad

* Hot and cute at the same time

* Wrecks everything even that p***y and d**k

J-Hope~

* Will destroy you with his dance moves

* BEWARE OF HIS HIPTHRUST

* Is a dom, don’t @me

* Ball of ing sunshine

* Can rap but also sings(listen to spring day)

* Deserves better

* Sprite

* Cutie

Jimin~

* Shy but lowkey freaky

* Seriously this man is a little er

* Probably gay

* Also a great dancer

* Hits notes higher then stephen hawking IQ

* Fine af

V~

* HAS DESTROYED MY LIFE

* Will go from I’ll have her home by 8 to she calls me daddy

* Voice is as smooth as a buttery yeast roll

* Funny/weird/cute/y

* Will ruin your life, please stay clear

Jungkook~

* Youngest

* Nice face, nice bod, HAS ING ABS KFKWOJDNE

* Seems cool

* This boy can do anything

* Voice is 10/10

* Rumor has it, his golden abs have blinded people

Nobody knows the origin of these disrespectful little sausages who I love with all my heart but some believe God sent them down as a form of population control since there hip trust can kill any unsuspecting victim. Now that we know a little bit about the 7, why don’t we get into the story?

One spring day, all 7 of the boys were at home. Taehyung, Jimin, and Jungkook were sitting on the couch playing games, J-hope was hiding from Suga since they were playing hide and go seek, and Suga was asleep in his room(gave up looking for j-hope as soon as the game started). This of course was like any other day in the house of BTS. Now you must be thinking that I forgot about Namjoon and Jin right? Nope, I didn’t. Those two were in the kitchen because Joonie boy is a thirsty little hoe and wanted the Jin’s D so he asked him if he could help him learn how to “cook”. Jin being the angel 👼 he is said of course.

Tae, Jimin, and Jungkook continued playing whatever they were playing until they heard a loud noise coming from the kitchen, followed with Jin screaming “ Namjoon don’t go so hard.” All three of them paused at that. Hoseok came out from his hiding place and rushed into the living room followed by Yoongi who had woken up a little bit ago. The 5 of them were completely still waiting for the next movement/sound to come from the kitchen.

“Ohhhh that taste so good,” Namjoon moaned out followed by a noise of something being repeatedly jerked(I couldn’t think of a word)

“Go harder and faster,” they heard Jin say and then the noise became more frantic and fast.

“Like that?”

“Yeah just like that.”

“Joonie be careful putting that in there, it’s quite big.”

Taehyung, Jimin, Hoseok, and Yoongi all gave each other the “look” while Jungkook was jungshook and disgusted.

This continued for about 20 more minutes then small moans and groans could be heard through the house. Jungkook had enough of the grossness and decided to go into the kitchen, get Jin and Namjoon to stop being dirty, and continue gaming(we all know his freaky just wanted to see some action). Even though the other 4 protested, he decided to still go in there. Hesitating a little, he took a deep breath and threw open the kitchen door.

“Guys can you-what the ?”

The other 4 followed Jungkook in only to stop dead in there tracks red faced. Nothing could prepare them for what they saw.

Jin and Namjoon were sitting in the kitchen eating burgers, sausages, hotdogs, rice, and cookies. (I couldn’t think of anything 🤷‍♀️)

“Hey guys!” Namjoon states with a mouth full of food. The 5 boys stood in the door way dumb founded. All the noise they heard was just Jin coaching Namjoon on cooking.

“What’s wrong?” Jin asked as the boys still stood there lost for words.

“We, we though….”

“We heard moans and…”

“The noises were loud…”

“Namjoon being the thirsty dude he is…”

“WE THOUGHT YOU TWO WERE BANGING!! WE THOUGHT YALL WERE GIVING EACH OTHER THE D,” Jungkook screamed over the other 4 boys who were trying to form words.

Namjoon and Jin looked at each other for a split second and started dying of laughter.

"You thought we were what?” Namjoon laughed out as tear started to fall out of his eyes.

“Why would we have with you guys in the house?” Jin questioned also in tears. Again, the other boys were silent.

“Plus, Joonie boy and I haven’t banged in a good bit. The only person I’m banging right now is Jimin and that’s only on the weekends,” Jin laughed out as he exited the kitchen.

"Yeah that’s, wait what?” Namjoon asked as he processed what Jin just said. Leaving the boys to give each other, the look