coward

NOVICE (EXO Chanyeol Fanfiction)

A/N: Just a quick side note XD. I promise to write with clarity from now on. I'm feeling down these days but I'll make sure not to let it dampen my mood. Now enjoy this little update~

 

 

Baekhyun sat by the chairs outside of Im Sua's hospital room while her father talks with the hospital staff about her condition.

Upon hearing the news about his daughter, Mr. Im immediately rushed to the hospital, worried sick about his daughter. 

Now, the twenty year-old guy was  caught in a deep thought as his earlier talk with the middle-aged man came rushing back to his mind. 

--

"When she was just a child, Sua was kidnapped." Mr Im explained to the younger carefully. "She was on a field trip that day, and they were on an amusement park. As a young kid, our Sua was very playful and active. Sadly, this character of her was what brought her to danger."

Baekhyun lend all his ears to the narrating man. He might be mad at the man's daughter but he's not that much of a monster to disrespect the man who brought her in this world. 

Nope, a Byun will never do that. 

Mr Im continued. "She was kidnapped without anybody noticing as she was playing with another girl from a different school she met that day." The man furrowed his brows, as if raking his brain, trying to remember, "I can't remember the girl's name, I'm sorry. But Sua told me her name, I believe." Her father smiled embarrassedly and younger copied his movement, mouthing a small 'it's okay' at him. 

"She and the other girl were brought in an abandoned warehouse and were held captive for almost a day, for as long as I can remember."

"The infuriating thing was..."

The college student leaned closer towards the man who ushered him to closer. "The other girl left our Sua and escaped." Baekhyun's eyes widened as his mouth went agape. He was flabbergasted at the newfound information. 

Mr Im smiled bitterly. "Fortunately, Sua was able to escape as well then went to the nearest police station. Ever since then, my daughter has been terrified to the idea of someone leaving her, must be the trauma caused by that dreadful incident."

All of a sudden, the father's eyes darkened and his hands balled to fists. "And whoever triggered her anxiety attacks must be punished gravely." He glared at Baekhyun straight in the eye, unblinking. "I was told that you're with my daughter earlier." 

By automatic response, Byun Baekhyun nodded his head in agreement. "Yes, that's right." Unconsciously, he started feeling weird staring at those dark orbs the man was sporting.

 After a few good seconds of staring down each other, the older tilted his head to the right lightly. "Do you by chance, know who triggered by daughter's anxiety attacks?" 

At his question, Baekhyun felt shiver run down his spine and cold sweat to bead on his forehead. The man looks scary and ready to kill...

"I..." Heck, why can't he answer?

"You..."

"I—"

"Mr Im?" 

It was the doctor that checked the girl's vitals and condition. Hearing the voice, both heads turned to her and she smiled at the two males. She was holding the knob to the hospital room as her body pops from inside. "Im Sua-ssi's condition is stable now." She started, glancing at each other alternately. "May I speak with the guardian?" She asked and the older was quick to step forward. 

"I'm her father." He mused and the kind doctor offered him a small smile. She opened the door wider, "Please come inside."

When the door closed with a snap from the knob, Baekhyun let go of the breath he didn't know he was holding since the confrontation with her father earlier.

That day of February 2013, Byun Baekhyun discovered just how frightening Im Jaebum could be. 

--

The way she acted earlier was very out of the ordinary and he knew by then that something was wrong with the girl.

Though as much as he hates to admit it, the earlier happenings made him realize one important thing; 

Im Sua is a victim too. 

After all, which person in her right state of mind would initiate an ambush to another, right?

Come to think of it, it must be one of the reasons why she hated girls coming closer to Chanyeol. She must be very afraid to be left alone by him, which is quite absurd because Baekhyun knows what his friend feels for the girl is real.

Remembering how he acted rashly in front of her in the library earlier, the twenty year-old brushed his hair back in frustration of his self. He was fast to judge her without even knowing the reason behind all her doings. 

But he couldn't be fully blamed also, whoever would be fine and not mad when he realized a relative of him was harassed and ambushed?

He was still mad at the woman because of what she caused Aemi, but what could he do? He's not that much of a monster to not feel pity for the girl inside the room, lying on a hospital bed. 

He could still remember want she told him earlier amidst having breathing difficulty.

"Don't —"

"...Don't tell my father you t-triggered my a-a-anxiety a- attacks."

She must know her father really well that's why she advised him not to admit his fault. 

Finally, Baekhyun leaned his back on the chair as he released a deep sigh. He promised he'd avenge Aemi but how could he do that? When clearly, Im Sua was a victim in this crazy world as well?

Only time would be able to tell if his relationship with his cousin will be able to go back to the way it was before.

After all, she was healed and happy all because of him. 

He just hope it's soon, or he'll die in despair not being able to tell her about his feelings. 

--

Byun Aemi was restless. Her heart, that is.

She had been feeling like this for over a month now, she desperately wants to talk it out with somebody but she was afraid of being judged and getting involved in the situation. And for the first time since forever, she found herself yearning for her parents' presence when it was her decision to lock herself away from them. 

Weeks since she started seeing a therapist to cure her trauma, the girl made the decision to live separately away from her parents. She reckoned that if she wants to heal fully, then she needs to remove everything that causes her negativities. 

But right now, after the news about the incident erupted, Byun Aemi found herself sleepless at nights, afraid to close her eyes in case the last image of her would come to her mind, giving her nightmares, and the sound of the gun shots making her feel cold shiver on her spine. 

She hopes that someone would come and save her this time, just like a few months back. 

In the middle of her deep thinking, the intercom to her unit sounded, signalling someone's presence just outside the door. She knew very well who was behind it, but what caught her in confusion was the fact that he didn't punched in her passcode. 

It was simply her parents' anniversary date. 

Nevertheless, the girl stood up then walked towards her door to open it. 

Upon opening it, Aemi's eyes widened immediately, tears b her eyes. Standing before her, just outside the door, stood the person she needed the most, who happened to be absent from her life because of his university schedules for almost three months. 

Baekhyun had a very solemn look on his face and upon seeing his cousin, he smiled at her. 

However it didn't reach his eyes. Aemi was so used to seeing his bright and wide smiles that she couldn't help but wonder if he was broken too, just like how she was broken and damaged, beyond repair. 

Without thinking much, Byun Aemi threw herself towards the older, hugging him for dear life as she wailed like a small child, releasing all her pent up frustrations bottled inside her. 

"I h-have wished for y-you to come," she choked on her words, her arms tightening around his neck. As a response, the guy s his arms comfortingly around her waist, tightening his hold as he felt like crying too. 

He was conflicted and he doesn't know what to do rather than hug her and cry along with her. Whatever happened earlier, he doesn't know if it will break them apart or make them closer together, though one thing's for sure...

He needs to tell Aemi this and be honest with her. 

Byun Baekhyun is here. And Byun Aemi knew that she was once more saved. 

--

Sitting down on her bed, Baekhyun fixed his gaze onto their joined hands, beads of sweat on his hairline. He couldn't maintain eye contact with his cousin knowing fully well his view in this matter drastically changed. 

Feeling that there's something bothering him, Aemi shook their hands together. "Oppa," she urged him to look at her eyes and when he did, she offered him a small smile. 

The guy, however, immediately looked down, feeling all the more guilty at the way Aemi was looking at him. 

Right now, she looks at him like he's the only one she needed. 

But later, He knows that she will look at him like he's the most despicable creature in this world. 

Call him selfish but he wants to savor this moment with her because he knows for sure that everything will change after this meeting. 

"What's wrong?" She whispered and it took every ounce of courage from Baekhyun to not break down and cry in front of her. 

Instead, he removed his hands from her, before cupping her nape, directing her body to rest against his, engaging her in a warm and desperate embrace.

Desperate for her forgiveness. 

He went to rest his forehead on the crook of her neck as he felt the tears coming. 

But he held it back. 

Because he's in no position to cry.

Not now. Not ever.

Byun Aemi was caught off guard by this sudden move, this would probably be the most intimate touch he initiated because let's face it, she was always the one to initiate intimate skin ships with her cousin because she trusts him so much. 

He must be very broken for him to find sanctuary with intimate touches right now.

In response, she caged the shaking guy in her embrace, patting his back, soothing him out of his confliction. She smiled as she rested her chin on his shoulder when she felt him calming down. 

She was so focused on her misery that she forgot Byun Baekhyun was human too and can be hurt. She was so focused on the fact that she was always the victim that she forgot this guy in her embrace needed saving too. 

So for once, she choose to be the one to save him this time. 

"It's fine, I'm here." She whispered as she could feel the tears stinging her eyes. Never would she have imagined him to be broken like this. "What's wrong?" She continued rubbing his back, cooing at him as if she was talking to a toddler who had his lollipop stolen from him. 

Baekhyun's hold on her tightened. 

It was now or never.

"Im Sua," he started and her hand that was rubbing her back stopped. He heaved a sigh when he felt her hands stilling, gripping on his shirt ever so slightly. He was one step closer to breaking her. 

"I think she's a victim too." He ended and for a few good seconds, none of them dared speak until his cousin was the one to break the hug. 

Baekhyun trained his gaze at her lowered head finally, worried of what her reaction would be. 

"Aemi—"

"get out..." she spoke in an undertone, her hands shaking on her lap. 

Baekhyun reached for her hands, "Aemi-yah—"

"I said get out!" This will be the first time ever that Byun Aemi raised her voice at someone else. And she never expected that it would be Byun Baekhyun, the guy who she trusted the most, would be the cause of it. 

Everything was preposterous! How could his view in this matter change? A few months back he promised her he would avenge her but right now, he was telling her nonessential things.

What Im Sua did was obviously unforgivable and yet, she immediately gained Baekhyun's empathy.

"Aemi, I'm sorry —" The older tried to apologize. He knows every damage has already been done but he still hopes that things would be fixed. He finally felt the tears fell as he looked at her brokenly. 

"Get out! before I call on the police!" Aemi screamed her anger as she stood up, glaring at her cousin menacingly. "You're no different from them," she gritted her teeth as her breathing becomes ragged. 

When she started having difficulty breathing, Baekhyun knew it would be worse if he stay any longer. Reluctantly, he stood up from her bed before turning his heels towards the exit to her bedroom. 

But before he could come out, he spared her one last glance, his eyes broken. "I'm sorry, Aemi-yah."

Byun Aemi remained rooted on her spot even when her bedroom door shut close. However, when she heard her front door closing afterwards, signalling his departure, the eighteen year old girl finally dropped down to her knees, buckets of tears leaking out from her closed eyes. 

She thought he was different but the meeting today proved otherwise. 

Her phone rang from her bedside table but she paid no heed. 

It was most probably him again, bugging her just like he used to this past month. 

After all, he would just act the way like how her cousin did. 

And just like before, Byun Aemi found herself back on square one again. 

--

Few weeks after Sua was released from the hospital, she started going to university once more. 

She sat by her usual place in the library, as she wait for her boyfriend to come and pick her up. Being jailed in the hospital for almost two weeks, Chanyeol promised to bring her out on a date the first thing when she come back to school. 

She lifted her gaze up from the book she's reading when she felt someone's presence in front of her. Thinking that it was her beloved boyfriend, the side of her lips curved upwards by automatic response only to drop instantly when she saw who was the guy facing her. 

Byun Baekhyun was looking down at her with a solemn expression on his face before he sat down on the seat across her. Awkwardly, Sua's gaze went back to her book as she fiddled with the sides of the pages. 

She never liked looking weak in front of others and now that this obnoxiously loud guy knew about her secret as mentioned by her father before, she couldn't stand being snark with him.

"I'm sorry." 

Her eyes widened upon hearing the word. She thought she went deaf for a moment. 

Never in her entire life had somebody apologized to her aside from Chanyeol that she was flabbergasted by the idea. Her eyes shot up to stare at his regretful expression and she could feel the tears building. 

"No," She choked down a sob by biting her lower lip. "I'm sorry." 

She looked down on her lap and that's when she broke down finally, hot tears streaming down her face. 

She has never thought that another guy aside from her boyfriend would be able to treat her normally despite her shortcomings. 

And she was grateful to Baekhyun for that.

--

Aemi told Baekhyun some more. So much more than what the guy could recall. Some things that he couldn't quite comprehend. By the time she ended her confession, the older's palms felt cold as the throbbing on his rib cage was loud enough for the whole world to hear. 

He felt as if half of him died when she told him something he never knew happened involving his cousin. 

"How—" he cut himself off because he felt like he was going crazy just by thinking. 

"Oppa, I'm sorry..." Aemi wailed like a little child as she cover her face using her palms, conflicted with her self. "I'm sorry." Her voice came out muffled by her hands. 

"How could you be selfish and not tell them about this?!" 

Baekhyun was mad. Beyond belief. 

He could even feel the clattering of his teeth as he tried his best to control his anger. 

Byun Aemi was a coward, he knows that for a fact already. But he doesn't know she was this selfish to the extent of hiding the truth just because of her cowardliness.

Six years ago, it was her who kicked him out of her unit. But right now, in his state of anger, he was more than willing to get out of her unit in his own free will. 

And he did. 

But before he could come out of the door ultimately, without sparing her a glance he spoke. "I'm sorry, I'm no different from them." 

And her unit door closed loudly. 

--

Five hours since Baekhyun left her, Aemi was situated on the bed, gripping her phone tightly. 

She doesn't want to do this anymore. She doesn't want to submit to her fears anymore. And just like what he told her earlier, She was the only one who can save her self. 

And if she really wants to heal, she must do this thing that's on her mind since the moment he left her. 

Everything might be absurd but she wants to try even so. 

With that thought in mind, she opened her contact folder, searching for the achingly familiar name. And when she did, she didn't hesitate to press the call button. 

Sorry. The number you have dialed is currently unattended...

~end of chapter 24~

A/N: Sorry I haven't dropped the biggest bomb yet hahaThough I did drop one of the biggest hints actually XD. Have you guys seen it? Try to go back a few chapters back and try to read again haha. 

Also, I (kind of) dropped some hint to Baekhyun's further development so I hope I didn't disappoint. Anddddd

Who's the him Aemi's referring to? You'll know very soooon so be patient for the next updates okay? 

NOW FOR THE MAIN THING....

HAVE YOU GUYS WATCHED BYUN BAEKHYUN'S CANDY???? I was—ddkfnfkgsnsfkfnfn (hahhahaha dont mind me I'm just being crazy again!!!!!) I like how he pronounced the word chemistry in there, so cute! 

also, the mature cinnamon and dorky mint lines really suit Baekie as he could really be both! (like really guys, you know what I'm talking about) He might be a puppy but he knows how to handle EXO's concepts every comeback. Every single time. 

Just a small note haha. I just learned how to use the REPLY button but it's not always working in my phone! asdfghjklcbncb

It's byebye for nowwww hahhaha

P.s. My mom's pushing me to eat now, so yeah~

 

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laidbacknewbie
A chapter's under editing!!! \(^.^)/

Comments

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Cass_Addiction19 #1
<3
ninefinity13
#2
Chapter 20: Work with —
ninefinity13
#3
Chapter 19: Fighting always!!! You're doing fine
Nicky09 #4
Chapter 20: Such a great story, can’t wait for the next update!!
yeolmyheart
#5
Chapter 12: me!
im still here!
yeolmyheart
#6
Chapter 11: ooo she finally knew!
yeolmyheart
#7
Chapter 10: whoa ?
finally he met her hahahahaha

and now yeol knew there was something wrong about her
yeolmyheart
#8
Chapter 9: i just finished reading this aaaaa omg
cant wait to see more XD